Author Beth Pinsker shares her experience overcoming the challenges of financial caregiving based on her book “My Mother’s Money.”

Most people imagine estate planning, inheritance, and beneficiaries when they think about aging. But today, more and more adult children are also facing something much harder: stepping in to manage their parents’ finances when those parents can no longer manage them alone.

Financial caregiving doesn’t happen on a schedule. It happens suddenly — often without warning — and almost always under stress. This week on the Retire Today podcast, author Beth Pinsker joined the show to share her personal journey caring for her mother’s finances and what she learned through the process.

Beth’s story is a powerful reminder that caregiving isn’t just medical or emotional work. It’s also financial work — often overwhelming, always important, and usually invisible. 

Her experience shows exactly why retirees and their adult children must plan before a crisis begins.

For Beth, caregiving didn’t begin with a long decline. It began with a spinal surgery. Her mother was 76, independent, and expected to bounce back. Instead, complications piled up, recovery stalled, and suddenly Beth found herself sitting at her mother’s desk facing “a stack of mail” and realizing she was now responsible for keeping her mother’s entire financial life running.

“It wasn’t planned. It wasn’t expected. It just became necessary.”

Bills needed paying. Insurance forms needed submitting. Premiums were past due. And her mother — once meticulously organized — could no longer manage the tasks she’d handled her entire life.

This is the emotional heart of financial caregiving:
You’re still the child, but suddenly you must act like the adult.

For years, Beth advised readers to get  power of attorney as if the document solved everything. But when she needed to use a POA for her mother, reality hit hard.

“The two sheets of paper are absolutely essential, but they mean nothing in your hands.”

Banks refused to accept the document. Appointments took hours. Institutions demanded impossible requirements like raised-seal originals from states that don’t even offer them. And government agencies — IRS, Social Security, Medicare, VA — each required entirely separate authorization forms.

Her conclusion is vital for every retiree and adult child:

Caregivers need to pre-authorize access, complete institution-specific forms, and have a system in place before there’s a crisis.

Beth spoke to dozens of caregivers for her book My Mother’s Money, and she said every single one cried in her interviews.

Why?
Because caregiving is hard in a way that combines emotional strain, logistical chaos, and relentless responsibility.

As she put it:
“Everybody reached their breaking point over something… there is going to be something that trips you up.”

Even an elder-law attorney — someone who spent 30 years designing estate plans — hit a breaking point trying to locate a medallion signature guarantee for his mother’s account. If the professionals struggle, imagine what everyday families face.

Financial caregiving is exhausting and complicated. But it also deepens relationships, clarifies values, and often becomes one of the last loving acts a child performs for a parent.

If you’re caring for aging parents (or expect to someday), start the conversation now:

Beth’s story is powerful because it’s honest. Caring for someone else’s finances is messy, emotional, and often overwhelming — but with preparation, it can be manageable and meaningful.

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About the Author:

Jeremy Keil, CFP®, CFA® is a financial advisor in Milwaukee, WI, author of the bestseller Retire Today: Create Your Retirement Master Plan in 5 Simple Steps and host of both the Retire Today Podcast and Mr. Retirement YouTube channel

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