Divorce Dialogues

How to Reduce Conflict & Save Money in Divorce With Andy Heller


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So, you’d like to take the high road in your divorce, but you’re afraid you’ll get screwed in the process.
If you ask Andy Heller, that is a flawed way to look at things. In fact, he contends that there’s a positive correlation between conflict and cost in divorce.
And you can save money and protect your health and wellbeing by letting some things go and incorporating empathy into actions that affect your ex.
Andy is the author of Take the High Road: Divorce with Compassion for Yourself and Your Family, a roadmap of best practices to make divorce easier for you, your children and your former spouse.
In the book, Andy leverages his personal experience with divorce and background as businessman and real estate investor to communicate practical strategies that replace battleground tactics with a healthy, supportive process that works for all involved.
On this episode of Divorce Dialogues, Andy joins Katherine to share the business skills that helped him navigate divorce effectively, like presenting two offers in a negotiation and using the timecard tool in high-conflict situations.
Andy explains why you shouldn’t criticize your spouse in the company of your children (even if your ex is criticizing you!) and explores how to cultivate patience as your kids adjust to new circumstances.
Listen in for Andy’s insight on communicating with your ex-spouse as coparents and learn how to reduce conflict and save money by taking the high road in a divorce negotiation.
Topics Covered
How his experience of divorce inspired Andy to write Take the High Road
Why you actually save money by reducing the number of conflict points in a divorce
The benefit of focusing on the outcome you want vs. making your ex pay
Why you shouldn’t criticize your spouse in the company of your children (even if your ex criticizes you)
What business skills Andy recommends to help divorcing people coparent effectively
Andy’s strategy of presenting two offers in negotiating an MSA
How to offset the concern that you’re compromising too early in divorce negotiations
Using the business tool of the timecard in a high-conflict divorce
Andy’s advice on communicating in coparenting with questions and deferring to your ex for solutions
How to cultivate patience and help your kids adjust to new circumstances
Connect with Andy Heller
Take the High Road to Divorce:
https://takethehighroaddivorce.com/
Connect with Katherine Miller
The Center for Understanding Conflict: http://understandinginconflict.org/
Miller Law Group: https://westchesterfamilylaw.com/
Katherine on LinkedIn: linkedin.com/in/kemiller1
The New Yorker’s Guide to Collaborative Divorce by Katherine Miller: https://www.amazon.com/New-Yorkers-Guide-Collaborative-Divorce/dp/0692496246
Call (914) 738-7765
Resources
Take the High Road: Divorce with Compassion for Yourself and Your Family by Andy Heller:
https://www.amazon.com/dp/1940013941/ref=cm_sw_r_api_i_VTQAP10J5N8HJ8MAYJ49_0
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Divorce DialoguesBy Katherine Miller

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