I Have No Idea What I’m Doing

I talk about the regret I feel surrounding the final month of Mom’s life and Grandma’s life, along with what I’m doing to stay in decent mental health headspace, and I try to take a moment to appreciate the hard work I’m doing and finding the confidence to believe in myself. I read a poem I wrote called, “I Dream About Dying,” and I urge people to write in with their struggles during the pandemic.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

If you want to share your sad life-happenings that feel invisible, especially because of the pandemic, you can email me at [email protected].

Feel free to follow the podcast on Twitter: @IDKPandemicPod.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

I talk about some heavy stuff in this one. Missing Mom, feeling the dread as March approaches. Crying over apples and sudden grocery-related memories, followed by feeling weird with strange, out-of-place grief. I mention reading The Perks of Being a Wallflower by Stephen Chbosky – if you read it, be ready for some heavy content in that book. I also talk about other things, but these are the highlights that I remember. I also read another email from a listener!

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

If you want to share your sad life-happenings that feel invisible, especially because of the pandemic, you can email me at [email protected].

If you don’t want to follow me for some reason, but you want to listen to this podcast, you can keep up with the podcast specifically by following @IDKPandemicPod on Twitter. It will be where I post podcast stuff exclusively without all the other stuff I like to tweet about on my own account.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

This one is about finishing Spider-Man/Deadpool, watching some shows(!!) – one of which is Peacemaker, which I might accidentally call Peacekeeper? (Sorry, it’s because I like The Hunger Games and mix up the words sometimes.) – and grief and letting go and sharing this podcast feeling a little less awkward. I have a listener email to read that I didn’t read this episode because I have big migraine threatening to swallow me whole. I wanted to do the email justice, and today, I don’t think I could have done that. I will read the email titled “Sunshine Patriots” on next week’s episode instead.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

If you want to share your sad life-happenings that feel invisible, especially because of the pandemic, you can email me at [email protected].

If you don’t want to follow me for some reason, but you want to listen to this podcast, you can keep up with the podcast specifically by following @IDKPandemicPod on Twitter. It will be where I post podcast stuff exclusively without all the other stuff I like to tweet about on my own account.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

This one is about writing, a new stage of grief, the booster shot and how it’s affecting my self-care, what I’m doing to deal with emotional pain from the holidays and birthdays and how I could be doing something better about that probably. Reading comics and coming up on finishing a comic series I’ve been reading for a few years now and considering what I’ll read next as far as comics go. I also talk about how hard hometown visits are now, despite being incredibly homesick for the people, the place is difficult to be. I’ve also received the very first listener email, so I share that as well, and then I ramble about it a little bit.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

If you want to share your sad life-happenings that feel invisible, especially because of the pandemic, you can email me at [email protected].

If you don’t want to follow me for some reason, but you want to listen to this podcast, you can keep up with the podcast specifically by following @IDKPandemicPod on Twitter. It will be where I post podcast stuff exclusively without all the other stuff I like to tweet about on my own account.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

I talk about the booster shot, my birthday, writing and participating in creative activities, but mostly, I talk about reading and some of the stuff I’ve read recently or over the last year, because my jaw hurts and I feel quiet on the inside.

In this one, I also unveil a new feature of this podcast. So, there’s also that. You’ll notice there’s an email address and Twitter handle at the bottom of this description. This episode also contains some rules of engagement concerning how to interact with that information. Also, I think in the episode, I say the Twitter handle is the exact same as the email address, but it's not. The true Twitter handle is @IDKPandemicPod and it's hyperlinked below. 

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

If you want to share your sad shit, you can email me at [email protected].

If you don’t want to follow me for some reason, but you want to listen to this podcast, you can keep up with the podcast specifically by following @IDKPandemicPod on Twitter. It’s not up and running just yet, but it will be where I post podcast stuff exclusively without all the other stuff I like to tweet about on my own account. So, you know there’s that, too.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

This one is all about Betty White, Mom’s birthday, and Harry Potter. Oh! Aaaand the anxiety I'm experiencing about the impending booster shot. Also, a general fear and anxiety about death and people I love and care about dying. Just lots of death and difficult things, and doing things despite those feelings.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

Wow, I talk a lot in this one! I talk about how Christmas went, how big and heavy the struggle has been to get through the week after Christmas as well, and what we plan to do for Mom’s birthday weekend. I also talk about the pandemic and other people losing people, how that makes me feel. I talk about the 2022 Goodreads Reading Challenge and the goal I set for myself. I talk about all kinds of things in this one. Be warned all around.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

I talk about how I plan to help myself make it to Christmas and through the rough days in January, what I’m trying to focus on my energy on, and trying to get to better versions of myself beyond mental illness and physical ailments. Mainly, I talk about how much it sucks that Mom’s gone and how traditions have to change because the old ones hurt or have become impossible, because of my newly identified gluten trouble.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

This one is about trying to not be so depressed, and what I did in order to try getting out of the depression. I talk about the pandemic, mental health, Christmas, and how I’m feeling about all of it. I really do focus on trying to climb out of the depression, although I’m still highly depressed.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr

I’m lucky I even recorded this one! Depression and grief have been kicking my butt, and I talk about that. I also share a journal entry, because I’m so sad and tired.

As always, I swear and talk about a lot of heavy stuff; you've been warned.

I haven’t made time to participate in the Reedsy Prompts challenges lately, but I’m still including the link to that and my Twitter.

Reedsy Prompts Profile: Here (https://blog.reedsy.com/creative-writing-prompts/author/cassie-poormokhtar/)

Twitter: @cassieprmkhtr (https://twitter.com/cassieprmkhtr)

If you want a link to all my links: drum.io/cassieprmkhtr