Send Me Questions on Attachment

On today's episode, I'll be discussing the red flags in Christian relationships, but specifically on observing how you and the person you're dating relate to one another. Oftentimes, we are so used to behaving the way that we do in relationships without realizing how we may be harming the other person and even ourselves by not being aware of the negative ways in which we relate.

If you want to know how people “truly are”, see how they respond when they’re under stress or when they’re given power.  This is crucial to observe in dating relationships.

To help us understand what this can look like in Christian relationships, I provide some biblical advice to implement to counter what John Gottman calls the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: 
- First, I discuss some obvious red flags that lead you to leave the relationship immediately, 
- then, we discuss some more subtle red flags, and 
- lastly, we discuss Gottman's Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse: criticism, contempt, defensiveness, and stonewalling. 

Scriptures used in this episode: 

• Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear. – Eph. 4:29
• A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. – Prov. 15:1
• A fool gives full vent to his spirit, but a wise man quietly holds it back. – Prov. 29:11
• By pride comes nothing but strife, But with the well-advised is wisdom. – Prov. 13:10
• Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” – Eph. 4:32
• But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, - Gal. 5:22
• Be completely humble and gentle; be patient, bearing with one another in love. – Eph. 4:2
• When pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom. – Prov. 11:2
• Before a downfall the heart is haughty, but humility comes before honor. – Prov. 18:12

If you have any questions or comments on this topic, please  email me at [email protected].

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My mission is to provide Christians with content on how to address spiritual and mental health issues within the church. In fact, I often address shame and its effects on relationships within the church. 

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MY HOPE FOR YOU
I hope these episodes bring you closer to Christ and encourage you in your walk with Him. Meditating on Scripture, Being committed to prayer, and Seeking Christian community are all essential to helping us learn more of who He is and who He made us to be.

ABOUT ME 👇
I have been a Christ-follower for the last 20+ years of my life, and have seen the Lord's grace, strength, and faithfulness through it all. He led me to pursue a degree in higher education and has given me a gift for the field of counseling.