Remember two days ago when you sat down to a meal and thought, "Hmmm...this would really be better with a foon." No? But it's the shark of cutlery. Not like that other hybrid, that's just an example of putting two perfectly good things together and making a sub-par third. Benji called in sick. But lucky [...]

Erica Aren doesn't think time makes sense or that anyone can explain it. And that's because it doesn't and they can't. At least not after listening to Hollywood's theories and interplanetary census concerns. Benji has seen some Star Trek and Max has read some books. Remember : 1) People in space live longer. 2) Aliens [...]

Tiger? Octopus? Horse? If you had to be eaten alive by an animal, which would you choose to chow down on you? Meredith Murphy wants to know. Is it better to go in two bites or a thousand? Are we on land or in the water? Remember (Don't mind the technical blip around the 20 [...]

Audrey Philips (aka Tawdry Hipburn) wants us to name an animal for each letter of the alphabet. So Hollywood talks smack with Keanu Reeves on his chest. Max gets stumped by E. And Benji is outstanding at drinking out of cups. Remember : 1) Barbiturates count. Cattle and dog breeds not so much. 2) Raccoons [...]

Happy New Years! Making y'all think and laugh is something we really enjoying doing, so from the bottom of our shallow and empty hearts, thank you. It's 2016! Would you rather have good soup or bad sex? That's what Chandra Kleinhans wants to know. But it's not that simple - How long has it been? [...]

Jay Seevers has a question about technology - is the good worth the bad? We don't know. We're too busy singing songs... Hollywood is scared of video games. Max doesn't know how to use the internet. And Benji is the Candyman. Remember : 1) The combustion engine is a lot like sit-ups. 2) The world [...]

In honor of the new Star Wars movie... How do you feel about sex robots? Long time fan, photographer, and sexpot Tawdry Hipburn really wants to know. Hollywood is worried about the human seed bank conspiracy. Benji wants a perpetually disappointed wife. And Max doesn't want to get elecrtocuted in the shower. Remember : 1) [...]

If alcohol were illegal and marijuana wasn't, how would things be different? What would happen to bars? What about frat parties? What would the commercials be like? That's what Tim Mahon wants to know. Max has never seen Police Academy. Benji loves Christmas. And Hollywood is a liberal radical terrorist. Remember : 1) No one [...]

We aren't smoking 'em but we are talking about 'em, sort of. Cousin Brian wants to know about the aesthetic value of trees. But we're more interested in if Steve Urkel killed the catchphrase. Max actually says something funny. Hollywood is all hopped up on Mountain Dew. And 14 year old Benji wasn't picky. Remember [...]

This one is for Winston...... How do you tap in euphoria when you need it? How do you turn all your bad feelings into good feelings? Does Back to the Future 3 count as a western? Amy O. wants to know. At least about two of those things. Benji is throwing more than Young Guns [...]