What qualities would the best books on adoption have inside them? Don’t worry - it’s not a trick question, so if things like “diversity”, “living with 2 families”, or “what being multicultural means and why it’s perfectly okay” came to your mind then you’re on the right track!

Now, let’s say you ask Google, “What are the best children’s books on adoption?” Chances are you’ll be reading synopses all about, “how long we waited for you”, “how much we wanted you”, or “how much we loved you before we even met you,” and while those are all sincere and important qualities you want in any adoptive parent, they are slightly beside the point - the one being adopted; what is the perspective of the adoptee?

On this episode, we chat all things literature with Claire, who is studying race in children’s literature, to be exact, at Central Michigan University. Join us as we talk about the presence of race in children’s books, why adoption material seems to always be about the parents and never the kids, and what we can do to change that. Listen now.⁠

Community. One word that has many meanings to many people. Here, at I’m Adopted, Now What? ‘Community’ means adoptees supporting other adoptees! So we’re back for another adoptee podcast collaboration on this week’s episode!⁠⁠

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We’re joined by co-hosts Addison & Libby from Adoptee Meets World, a podcast that dives into the Chinese-American adoptee perspective, to talk about… you guessed it! All things adoptee. From the desire to blend in with your friends when you’re a child, to the emotional rollercoaster of a heritage/homeland trip, from how proactive or avoidant parenting strategies can impact one’s identity, to the idea of “real asian” - be it those with immigrant parents from an asian country, the exclusive behavior of one asian group to another, or the experience of Imposter Syndrome/the Authenticity Dilemma where you yourself wonder if you’re really “asian”… We talk about all this, and more, on today’s episode, so listen now!⁠

Did you know that a baby’s brain absorbs information faster in their first 3 years than at any other time in their life?

No, not the kind of information that helps you distinguish the difference between left and right, up and down, or right from wrong (though many babies can, and do, begin to learn these basics during their first years)… I’m talking about learning information through observation, and take it from someone who spent a lot of time studying them in school… a baby’s brain doesn’t miss anything.

For a lot of parents, this is great news! Instead of teaching a child good manners the same way a teacher explains to a student why Jane has 2 apples left to sell after Adam bought 1, a parent can actively model what good manners look like and sound like. Instead of reading about it in a book or learning about it in a classroom, a parent can model that behavior, allowing the child to see it, in real time, on repeat.

The flip side of this indiscriminate information superhighway is that children often pick up on negative behaviors, too. Manners, sharing, teamwork, and respect are just a few values children are exposed to through passive observation. So, what happens to society when new generations of children are observing a growing rift between those who hold different values on subjects like racism and diversity? On this week’s episode, Sophia and I deep dive into all things racism; how being exposed to racism at different ages can impact how one thinks about race, about their own personal identity, and how Sophia’s study of eastern cultural anthropology has shifted her mindset altogether. Listen now.

We’ve spent a lot of time on this show discussing minority adoptees; what their origin stories are, how it feels to be adopted by people of a different race & culture, and who the future version of their present selves will be… but what about those who are not transracial adoptees (meaning both adoptee and adopter are of the same

race)? Join us on today’s episode where Simon, the podcast’s first white male adoptee, discusses just that.

We’re taking a leap across the pond in today’s episode, where we are joined by Simon Benn, a UK coach for adoptees looking to thrive. He talks about what life has been like as an adoptee in the UK, and shares a story with us, about how discovering the history of his favorite childhood teddy bear at age 40, lead to a complete reevaluation & reconstruction of his own identity. Listen now.

Have you ever played Two Truths and a Lie? If you haven’t, the rules are pretty simple: you state 3 facts about yourself and 1 has to be a lie while the other 2 facts must be true. Then, people have to try and figure out which fact is the lie.

It’s a common ice breaker game people play during employee retreats, summer camp, and the occasional birthday party. The things people choose to lie about are also fairly common: the existence of pets, how many siblings you have, a weird allergy, or whether or not you traveled to this cool place where a crazy thing happened to you (hint: that’s usually not the lie). But what probably isn’t so common is using your identity as part of the game. “I don’t speak Chinese” when people assume you do or “my parents are white” when people assume they’re not. Alia, one of the guests on today’s show, is one such people.

On this episode, I chat with Alia and her co-host Aimee from the Somewhere Between podcast where they too, talk with others about the concept of identity, and how our experiences as adoptees create ripple effects we feel our whole lives. Listen now.

✨BONUS EPISODE✨: The whale adventures continue this week as we visit the Arctic in search of Beluga Whales and their cousin, the Narwhal. Although they are relatively close relatives, they rarely ever cross paths with each other. So, what happens when a lost Narwhal stumbles into Beluga territory and he's discovered by a gang of young male Belugas? It may not be exactly what you'd expect.⁠

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Find out and listen to the podcast's 3rd bonus episode now!

We probably all know someone who knows someone who has that bad tattoo of something they can’t remember in a language they don’t speak. Now, imagine you cross paths and they ask you to translate it for them as cross their fingers and hope it says what it’s supposed to. They’re asking YOU because you look like you know if “Hermano” in Spanish really means “Brother”… But unfortunately for them, you don’t know Spanish, so they are S.O.L. (*shit outta luck, in case you didn’t know).

On this episode, we chat with Mattie, the podcast’s first adoptee who identifies as transgender and the inspiration for that short story above. Mattie talks about how they’re learning to weave together their adoptee and transgender identity, both in New Orleans and in an ongoing pandemic. Feeling disconnected, being a “bad asian”, & the importance of giving yourself grace - all that, and more on this episode. Listen now.

✨BONUS EPISODE✨: There are more than 90 species of whales, dolphins, & porpoises (known collectively as "cetaceans”) in the world. From the enormous Blue whale to the tiny Hector's dolphin, they exist in nearly every sea, ocean, & major fresh water system on Earth, and their variety is endless. Some have teeth to eat food while others rely on their baleen filter-feeding, some thrive in salty waters while others prefer fresh-water rivers, some communicate through song and others by whistling, some eat other large mammals and others only eat krill, some are smooth, some are bumpy… the list goes on and on!

But what does this have to do with a podcast all about adoption and identity? Well, I’ll tell you - whales adopt. That’s right! There are documented cases from around the world of different whale pods adopting other whales. The specific species and culture of those adopted don’t seem to factor in, as further observation of these groups indicate that empathy plays a main role in the adoption of stray whales into other pods. On today’s bonus episode, we talk about all things whale and reveal just how much whales and humans have in common; adoption is only the start. Listen now.

We’ve all heard the term “somewhere between” before. Whether in reference to an arrival or departure destination, when talking about our mood, or even when it comes to how hungry we are on a scale of “starving” to “food coma” - people find themselves “somewhere between” something, all the time. But, if you live in America and you’re a person of color, then you’ve probably heard it most when it comes to discussions of identity. You’re “somewhere between” American and Asian or “somewhere between” white and black or “somewhere between” speaking English and Spanish… So what does being “somewhere between” really feel like?

On this episode, I catch up with the Sisters of China, and ask them this very question. From feeling guilty about not being “white enough” to balancing self-reliance with asking for help, from managing expectations and the idea of perfection to dealing with abandonment trauma - we get real & get deep, as we talk about it all, so listen now.

✨BONUS EPISODE✨: Let me tell you about the time I ended up in the woods, deep in the middle of “Nowhere” Connecticut, surrounded by a bunch of Trump supporters…

As promised, my first bonus episode, where I get real, get deep, & get personal. Listen now!