In My World🌍💕

Jumping forward from the previous episode, I detail what this year away from recording has looked like for me and what my future looks like now because of it. We celebrate Love, compassion, patience and perseverance and what they can do for us when we give them time. Recorded 11 months after ‘Evolution is scurry’ this episode is an answer to that cry for help. To that cry for growth and change even though it wasn’t easy. I truly have learnt ‘new lows take you to new highs’ but I am beaming with gratitude. The pains and frustrations acting as fertiliser for my wants and now birthing a beautiful new space to bloom in. Uploaded from a place where I am harvesting all the beauties I have managed to produce I understand what a blessing time can be x

Change is often uncomfortable but Evolution can be scary! In today’s episode I go over themes like self doubt, fear and the long term effects of burn out. Our dreams and goals are often used to propel us forward but sometimes the weight of fear and perfectionism can have them hold us back. We can want change but the grip hold those cyclical thoughts and sabotaging behaviours can have on us is something we dont give ourselves enough credit or time to overcome as frightened habitual beings. Its already hard getting out of bed and facing the world when you dont want to but no one talks about how much harder it can feel to get out of bed and face the world when you DO want to! Back 11 months on what was only the beginning of some real scuRry evolutionary events in my life, This is a peek into a world ending and really through having this conversation, a new one beginning. Seeing and saying these feelings so clearly was the start of something new and really important to admit because it was in others doing exactly this that I started to grow x

Helloo~ I am back! after a year away with an episode from last year! Ahaha and I am just hit with revelation after revelation. This winding process that is this journey can really bring so much to our face that we never would have thought we’d see and I’ve found the best way to cope with this is to listen, be present and take accountability where I can. Accountability for my behaviour and outlook towards myself and those that I was unaware of towards others! I think the most healing understanding that I’ve come to realise with this episode is that we are only ever trying our best and working with what we have. That means some steps will be missed and our friend vulnerability will be our guide and foundation! I would run away from seeing myself so clearly but now its all I want to see. Even though this was Me a year ago, I still felt to share ~ x

I never understood this in primary school but I gave it a go anyway and that lead me to codependency, self abandonment and unhelpful attachments🥴 when I looked at this phrase through the loving gaze I now have for myself I realised that if I just flip it, its fine! Others still get love, care and respect but not before I receive them from myself! How do we expect to give something we ourselves are not familiar with? I could not teach something I had not learnt? This new rule of thumb has laid stable footing for more relationships that are healthy, full of of love and aligned with me and us at core.

This conversation with myself is detailing the beauty of growth and how its never lost~ I remember this thought being revolutionary for my healing and innerstanding and has been one of my most important and supportive pieces of Divine advice I’ve given myself. As I’ve grown I adore the power of the subconscious and inner world where nothing I experience, learn or know is ever lost but instead stored forever even if deep in the depths of my soul when I am yet to venture. I have had epiphanies and awakenings! That have changed my life and then been promptly forgotten the next day :P and absolutely wanted to skin myself alive for what felt like taking 9 steps back, being negligent of my spiritual property or just not serious but when I realised that even if its not at the forefront of my mind or soothing my heart, baby its somewhere and when its time it will come back again to be understood. “If I thought it once I can think it again” has been my motto for 3 years in regards to this and you know I take it like your teacher telling you that by the end of the semester, you will be learning this. I know what topics I will be covering but I havent learnt them yet but will when it comes up and its my time to understand them~ no need to rush the syllabus, reading ahead will do nothing when I dont understand the information and knowledge that proceeds it. Progress is saved, where you are in the journey is safe and you are always where you are meant to be🌹🌱

Wherever our mind rests on who we are, how we came to be that way and what purpose each of those things serve within us - I know there is no other way I’d rather be now that I know that I couldn’t be who I am in this moment without each and every part of me. Something that takes love, support, growing and shrinking is the most perfect thing of all because it possesses the moving and glorious energies of life. As we release polarity and embrace our duality, we meet at oneness and the true perfection of the well rounded whole ~

The penny finally dropped on what Divine timing is and that has opened up a world of abundance~ I am no stranger to patience fatigue and the brewing of spiritual resentment when in the *‘process of receiving’ feels like foreverrrrrrrr BUT when this realisation opened my eyes, the peace that soothed my aching body and longing heart was unparalleled and it brought with it my deepest desires. We often think holding onto an idea of our desires or wishes is what will bring it to life. We are told to keep the vision, make it clear and if you want it you’ll have it but that sometimes paralysing fear of not receiving that desire is what creates resistance between you both. You wanting from lack aka not having it instead of wanting from abundance because its already yours if you want it. This is linked to my S1E2 “your wants want you” episode~ have a listen to both :) things will come when you are in a space to receive them not in a time we think suits best. Time isn’t even real! When you understand everything you can conceive belongs to you and flow~ they will meet you. Breathe, release the wish to divine, to life, to God, what/whomever and know it is yours and watch. You just might get it sooner than you think 😉💛 **(I put it in quotes because really we are receiving all the time and technically there isn’t like windows of abundance, we are always abundant but there are periods that feel particularly transformative, have cyclical endings and are brimming with anticipation)

Big, Bright and Bold and its about time I as well as you for yourself, see it🥂 no more being a giant in a small house, this world is ours and this Earth is my home and now I choose to run around it free and unbound by the barriers and bonds I put myself in~ our grand life awaits and it starts once we see who we are and get what we know we want. Radical self love is the best super power and I’ve grown 3 times my size just embracing it.

This episode I close off this season with a triumphant bang, really sealing off all and what I could think of with the Friend that can feel like a foe, Change. What changes have been happening for me, choice and its power in change and personal liberation. It may be something for you and if so, now is the time🤍

Halloo~ I am back🥺. In this episode today I am talking about the pains of purpose, stressing over my under-sharing of my oversharing and wanting to be the best damn light I can be. I dive deep on me diving deep and actually how I increasingly found it difficult to, despite being a chatty patty. I used to be “My journey this” “The path that” “Just have a good day this” but over time what were my quirky diary sessions on my IG story or candid little esoteric conversations were now becoming cosmic mumbles or often silence. I found myself after losing myself by BEING myself and publicly, without inhibitions or worries but with self imposed pressure, everything changed. The gift I gave onto the world, my expression of creativity and contribution became stifled and the pain of this, argh. Not nice and I know its relatable. Feeling like your expression doesn’t fit, isn’t good enough, wont compete or keep up or just cant come out. Its okay though because whatever you share and bring into the world is your gift AS the gift that you are and everyone NEEDS it. All I ever wanted was to be the star I know that I am and not American idol or Oscar award winning star, I mean a bright source of love and guidance and FINALLY I think and feel I am again~ who knew chit chatting could become so hard! Its the thing I’m best at! Loool~ This episode I really strip back my sharing style to a more authentic expression and really just cuddle up, get cosy and talk with you or at least talk and y’all can listen. Maybe you’ll feel encouraged to share again too~