In the Loop with Andy Andrews

On this week’s episode, Andy discusses a listener question: I’m making an effort in positive personal development, but my spouse is not ready to do the same. What do you do until they’re ready, or how do I continue to nudge them in the right direction without being “pushy” or making them feel inferior?

This is a huge source of confusion is marriages. We all grow at different…

• Rates

• Times

• Areas

Confidence or Arrogance?

• Don’t brag about the improvements that you are making.

• It is hard for a spouse to listen to someone whom they perceive as arrogant.

• What you are doing speaks louder than anything you could say.

A good marriage is a work in progress. If you and your spouse were exactly alike, one of you would be unnecessary.

Questions for Listeners

Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

What is it about you that other people would change if they could?

• I’m not saying we should live our lives according to other people.
• What I am saying is if you look at your life, business, family, and want people to believe what you believe, it really helps if they like you a little bit.

What if 25% of people were not comfortable with swearing? If you’re a business person, would you be okay with having 25% less business just because of the way you talk?

• I had a friend who wanted to quit cursing around his boys.
• He decided that he would pay a quarter every time he did.
• It made him more aware of his words.

The other day one of my boys had a look on his face, and I could tell something was wrong. I asked:

• Can you do anything about it?
• Since you can’t do anything about it, how are you going to deal with it?
• Since you can see an end to it, you can either put a smile on your face or walk around looking sad for the next two weeks.
• What I’m trying to do is not just tell him what to do, but explain why this is something that he needs to learn.

People can sense when something is wrong, but most people aren’t going to say anything to you.

• When you’re older, this can be something that affects you getting hired, promoted, or given new opportunities.

People will never change long term just because you say so. They will change long term when you…

• Provide proof beyond a reasonable doubt of what’s in it for them.

Back in the ‘80s when I was doing comedy, I was booking more shows than just about anybody, and was even given the award as campus entertainer of the year.

• I’m not saying this is brag on myself, because I know I was not the funniest comedian.
• The difference was that, before and after the shows, I hung out with the students who were booking me and developed friendly relationships with them.

Questions for Listeners

Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
• E-Mail: [email protected]
• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week's episode, I talk about the surprising benefits of spending time alone.

Why is it important to spend time alone?

• Spending time alone is the best way to concentrate my thoughts.

• It’s a good way to stimulate creativity.

• If I can wake up before my family and refrain from checking email, my phone, or turning on the news, I can have amazing results.

This isn’t so much about being alone as it is about spending time with my boys, but while driving the boys to school, I reach my hand back and say, “Hands!” and we pray for…

• Teachers

• Friends

• Mom

• Our day

Sometimes, it’s necessary to leave the house in order to be alone. Here are some of the places I go:

• The woods are a great place for me to get away.

• I’ll go alone to a cabin sometimes and spend several days by myself.

• Most of my novels are not written while I’m at home.

• The water is not a particularly good place for me, as I’m always wondering what is in the water.

As much as you may be thinking, I wouldn’t say that I am alone a lot.

• It doesn’t have to be for long periods of time every single day.

• It’s important to make a habit of finding at least small portions of the day during which you can be alone.

We also had an interesting question come in: would I rather spend a year alone in a box, or 15 years alone in a hotel room? Tune in for my answer!

Questions for Listeners

Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week’s episode, I address the difference between being decisive and impulsive.

More people fail at what they attempt because of an undecided heart than any other reason.

• They’ll talk to their friends.

• Then talk to their family.
• Finally, they’ll make a decision.
• Then they’ll ask if they should have waited longer to make a decision.
• Then they’ll take the decision back.
• Life then becomes an ongoing analysis.

The question you need to ask yourself before making a decision is…Is this a wise thing to do?

• This is one of the best questions in life and one of the best questions to teach your kids to ask.

• It reveals what is ahead of you.

• If you’re asking if something is wrong, you’re going to rationalize the situation and keep pushing the envelope on what is “technically” wrong.

Andy Stanley states that direction determines destination—not intention.

• Intention has no power.
• Imagine how I would sound if I said, “I can’t believe Polly is treating me this way after everything I intended to do.”

The difference between being impulsive and decisive is wisdom.

• An important piece of wisdom is seeking out divine guidance.
• I count on being divinely guided.

What is wisdom?

• A deep understanding of principle.
• 3/4 of a principle gets you nothing; you must understand all aspects of the principle.

Questions for Listeners

Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
• E-Mail: [email protected]
• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week’s episode, I give the inside scoop on my short story Socks for Christmas and also do a live reading of the entire book.

In this reading of Socks for Christmas, you will hear a childhood story about how the gift of socks is one of the greatest reminders I have for being grateful.

I love talking about the inside scoop on some of these books, and to see the way that people use these stories to help others.

In the picture below, Jan Burch in Key West, FL, organized a Sock Drive with her ladies club.

On the cover of Socks for Christmas, that is my sister Christie and me on Christmas of ’68.

• I was nine years old

• Christie was four

On page nine, that is a picture of me at May May and Granddaddy’s house on Christmas morning.

On page 12, for Christmas Eve we would have a birthday cake and sing happy birthday to Jesus and it was always great. My family still does that.

On page 21, that is a picture of Christie in Dothan, AL. This was the same year that she was “Little Miss Sunbeam” on the Sunbeam float in the Peanut Festival Parade.

I also love the pictures of the different popular presents at the time

• Matchbox Cars

• Operation

• Candy Land

• Rock ‘Em Sock ‘Em Robots

If you order Socks for Christmas from AndyAndrews.com, they all come with a CD of Andy reading the story. All copies ordered before Tuesday, Dec. 17 2013 will be autographed.

Questions for Listeners

Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week’s episode, I explain what a personal board of directors is, and how you can create one for your life and/or business without spending a dime.

I realized that most major companies and great speakers had a group of people that keeps them on track.

I thought to myself, why can’t I have a board of directors?

• My first answer was because I didn’t have any money

• However, you don’t have to pay someone to be on your board of directors…if they don’t know they’re on it!

I want to find people who are….

• Better

• Smarter

• Wiser

• More productive

What’s important?

• My children

• My writing

• Speaking

• Finances

• Health

Mentally, I went though the people I loved and knew. I wrote down the people with long marriages or who were financially successful. I then started going through people who were in newspapers and were easy to follow. I called this group my board of directors.

This is a life application of the decision, I will seek wisdom.

I have 30 or 40 people on my board of directors.

First thing: Make a list of important things in your life. Attach names to those things.

Questions for Listeners

• Do you have a question? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!
  • Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
  • E-Mail: [email protected]
  • Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
  • Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week's episode, Andy announces a new host for In The Loop, and the events leading to the publishing of The Butterfly Effect.

Be sure to visit check out Andy Traub's latest eBook The Early to Rise Experience and visit AndyTraub.com for more information.

In the middle of the night during a hurricane, Andy received a phone call from General Foglesong in Afghanistan.

• He wanted Andy to find proof that every life matters and could make a difference to the world.
• The Air Force's suicide rate was higher than the general population's suicide rate.

Andy's interest in the Butterfly Effect, also known as the sensitive dependance upon initial conditions, led him to reverse engineer the life of Norman Borlaug, who is credited with saving the lives of over 2 billion people.

• Andy found that Norman's life was steered in its direction due to others' actions in the preceding years.

After hearing Andy tell the Butterfly Effect story live, Zig Ziglar told him that he should make part of his speech into a book.

• When the book was initially turned down by Thomas Nelson, the online publishing company Simple Truths picked it up.

• Over the course of the next 18 months, the book was picked up by two more publishers and became a success.

Never look at the "No's" as a final answer. There is always a "yes."

• Even while things are not going your way, keep a smile on your face and don't get frustrated.
• You don't know where things are going, and you need to keep doing what you think needs to be done.

Questions for Listeners

• Do you have a question for Andy? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week's episode, Andy discusses his passion for cooking and the steps to make his most famous dish.

When did Andy start cooking?

• He started with breakfast foods at an early age, moving from toast to eggs and bacon.

Was Polly skeptical about Andy being a good cook?

• She was delighted because chicken and rice was the only thing she knew how to make. Since then, Andy and Polly have worked together, and they both help prepare dishes.

Why does Andy like cooking so much?

• He loves to eat! What does he love to eat? The answer is, "Yes!"

Andy's blue ribbon recipe for his famous chicken and dumplings.

• Start the night before with a whole chicken in a pot of water. Add salt and pepper, cover the pot, and bring it to a boil. Once the water boils, put the pot in the oven at 250 degrees and let it sit overnight.

• The next morning, stir the pot and take out a cup or two of the broth. Strain the broth, add salt, cover it, and place in the refrigerator for later.

• Take the pot out of the oven and remove the chicken to cool. Strain the rest of the broth until it is clear and free of all the chicken particles.

• In a separate pot, mix 2 cups of plain white flower, 1/2 cup of oil, and 1/2 cup of the broth from the refrigerator together into dough. The leftover refrigerator broth can be poured back into the other pot of broth.

• Use a rolling pin to flatten the dough. It will take a couple of tries to determine the thickness that you prefer the dough at. Use a knife and cut the dough into strips that are six inches long and one-and-a-half inches wide. Bring the broth to a boil and add the strips.

• Now turn to the chicken and pick out the pieces that you want. Rinse them off and add to the boiling pot of broth and dough. The chicken will cause the broth to stop boiling. Once it boils again, turn off the heat and let it sit for 30 minutes.

• Serve it in either a bowl with added broth, or on a plate with just the chicken and dumplings.

Young men need to learn how to cook!

Questions for Listeners

• Do you have a question for Andy? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week’s episode, Andy answers a listener question about the best way to communicate with teenagers.

Listener question:

• When my daughter was 12, her three best friends moved away. Around that same time, another friend decided to tell her everything people didn’t like about her. We’ve been trying for the past three years to empower her again. She is now at a new school, but can’t seem to break out of the “new girl” frame of mind. What do we do as parents to break her out of this rut?

The most important thing you could do at this time is to be friends and talk to her. Really talk to her.

• Sometimes you will have to talk about why you are talking to her.

• A lot of times, kids this age tend to go to their room and put up a do-not-disturb sign.

• In spite of this, you still must talk to them.

It is important that you don’t teach your kids what to think, but how to think.

• We see this problem in our schools, but we tend to ignore it at home.

• Many parents sadly miss the opportunity to have long conversations with their kids about why they believe what they believe.

Kids will have conversations with you if they don’t think the answer will be a lecture.

• Giving kids the reasons and thought process behind the things you believe will create much more productive conversations.

• You need to be vulnerable sometimes and reveal that you recognize that you don’t know everything.

This is not to say that you should stop being an authority figure.

• You don’t need to be on “equal footing” with your child.

• But these conversations will allow you to teach your child how you arrived at these positions.

• Like it or not, at some point, your children will decide what they will believe, and you will have no control over it.

Questions for Listeners

• Do you have a question for Andy? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!

• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY

• E-Mail: [email protected]

• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews

• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews

On this week’s episode, Andy answers listener questions on transitioning out of a corporate job, gaining wisdom, and overcoming fears about things you can’t control.

Listener Question #1: Which stories and biographies have had the greatest impact on you, and how do you read these stories in a way that allows you to gather wisdom from them?

• If you want to know what books have had a huge effect on Andy, look at what he has written.
• For example, the historical figures in The Traveler’s Gift were all people whose stories had an impact on Andy during the time he was writing the book.
• One of the things that is most important to gathering wisdom is to simply acknowledge that you are actively seeking it.
• You have to ask for wisdom to receive it. Remember, God was delighted when Solomon asked for wisdom.

Listener Question #2: Is there one book in particular that would be the most helpful to someone who is trying to go from a corporate job to something different? What do you prescribe to someone who is stuck and wants to move?

• A lot of the answers to these kinds of questions are going to be in Andy’s upcoming book that will be released October 1, The Noticer Returns.
• Andy’s recent video blog, How to Start a Business from an Idea, might get you started in the right direction as well.
• People change when two things line up: What’s in it for me? Proof beyond a reasonable doubt.
• You must acknowledge the benefits that are there for you, and then you must be aware of the steps that have proven to work for others.

Listener Question #3: How do you control the fear of losing a valued relationship, such as a marriage?

• Fear can be overcome with a logical answer: fear is not from God.
• Generally, smart people are the ones who have a problem with fear. People who aren’t smart seem to have no problem with fear.
• If you remember that fear is not from God and that you are a smart, creative person, then you have to conclude that fear is a misuse of the creative imagination that has been put inside you.
• You cannot control the people you value in your life at all times. So you have to give those concerns about things you can’t control to God.

Resources Mentioned on This Episode:

• The Noticer Returns by Andy Andrews
• Early to Rise by Andy Traub
• Platform by Michael Hyatt

Questions for Listeners

• Do you have a question for Andy? Call in and your question might be featured on the show!
• Phone: 1-800-726-ANDY
• E-Mail: [email protected]
• Facebook.com/AndyAndrews
• Twitter.com/AndyAndrews