Inside Out Theory

This is a part two to my last conversation about women in leadership.

Let's not miss the point.

It's not about who I'm talking about it.

It's about the fact that this is an experience our young dancers are happening, period.

Let's not get hung up in the gossip, please.

Let's instead be aware of this behaviour, and ask ourselves how we can be a part of the solution.

Too many people will not actually hear what I'm really saying.

But if you do hear me, and want to be a part of the solution, then let's talk about it.

C x

Let me be clear.

I've witnessed and heard of far too many young dancers be bullied, put down, belittled, and made to feel ashamed for their dreams, choices, bodies, voices, thoughts personalities, and level of talent or skill, by adult leaders and/or educators that they look up to and learn from.

It's very disappointing to hear about this behaviour from adults, leaders, and educators in our community that should know better. Because most dancer sI've spoken too are too afraid to speak up, and because it now feels disrespectful to have this conversation behind closed doors, I thought it would be most appropriate to be honest about my opinion in hopes that it could lead to positive change.

From one leader to another, please be accountable for your actions, be proud of what you say and how you say it, and be aware of the responsibility and impact that your words have on these young dancers.

I promise to do the same.

We are all learning.

C x

This has been a long time coming.

It may also be my best work yet.

As per usual, it's emotional, raw, and full of equal amounts of epiphanies and f-bombs.

This will either make no sense, or shake you to your core.

You are enough, exactly as you are.

And I finally figured out how to truly believe that.

Let me know what happens...

C x

This one is messy. 

I needed to speak through some thoughts so I could find clarity. 

I didn’t have the answers, but I find them.

Yes, it gets emotional. 

I talk about singing, my ‘dream’ show, the fear of creating your own work, rejection, the grief that comes with growth, feeling too big or too much for this world, the need to be chosen, picking yourself, and so much more. 

This is a lesson in vulnerability.

Enjoy.

C x

This episode is based on questions and queries that came up during one to one sessions that I just thought were too invaluable not to share. 

Here are the questions we discover together, in real time:: 

“What did I train for? I’m afraid of wasting or running out of time.”

It’s important to note that you’ve all been taught the same tools, yet you’re all a very different machine…

You were trained skills, but you weren’t trained on how to be you. 

We fear afraid of running out of time when we’re not focusing on the right things. 

If you’re afraid of wasting time, you probably are…. ooooooofff.

“Who do you want to be? The one who has everything that everyone else wants, or the one that has everything you want?” 

There is more than one way to win this game…

“I’m lost.”

You can’t be found until you’re first once lost. 

Have a listen. It’s a gooder.

I dedicate this to anyone and everyone who has ever joined me for a one to one. 

C x

This episode is based on questions and queries that came up during one to one sessions that I just thought were too invaluable not to share. 

Here are the questions we discover together, in real time:

“I don’t feel like I’m disciplined enough to deserve getting a job, and I’m not putting in the work.”

You don’t necessarily need to change what ow how you’re training, but the intention behind your training needs to change. You’re putting in the work, you may just not putting in the right work. 

Please remember that we’re all participating in this industry in a different way, for different reasons, with different intentions. Which, fundamentally, will mean there are many different definitions of success.

“I haven’t changed or grown enough.”

You are conditionally (instead of unconditionally) loving yourself. Reward the action, not the outcome.

“What did I train for? I’m afraid of wasting or running out of time.”

This one is a monologue… just tune in. 

Have a listen. It’s a gooder.

I dedicate this episode to anyone and everyone who has ever joined me for a one to one session. 

C x

This episode is based on questions and queries that came up during one to one sessions that I just thought were too invaluable not to share. 

Here are the questions we discover together, in real time:

“How do I define my vision?”

You’re struggling to define your vision because you’re trying to to define it, not discover it…..

“How do I feel strong enough to not feel scared of success?”

Your strength comes from admitting that you’re afraid…

“How do I force myself to be successful?”

The more you you are, the more successful you’ll feel.

“How do I make creative work pay?”

Not being paid doesn’t make you a failure.

“To become successful feels like an uphill battle.”

You’re doing a million things to distract yourself from acknowledging the fact that you’re not doing the one thing you’re meant to do. You do this so you don’t feel like you’re just ‘coasting’ through life. This is how we avoid feeling mediocre, when in reality, doing a million things instead of one thing is how we become mediocre. 

Have a listen. It’s a good one.

I dedicate this episode to anyone and everyone who has ever joined me for a one to one session. 

C x

Somewhere in the midst of a rant about the power of Taylor Swift, following the first viewing of the Barbie film, came a free flowing diary entry where I discovered what it means to be free within the pursuit of true and utter fulfilment, which eventually became this episode.

Honestly, strap in.

Some highlights to note:

Being your best isn’t consistent, which was discovered when I reflected on the journey I went on from 'needing to be the best', to 'I'll just be my best', to ‘you’re probably not at your best if you’re always at your best, because you've stopped growing'. In fact, maybe there is no best, there's just whole or not whole.

I also reflect on the consistent struggle of being ‘too much’ for people, and how the fear of not being my whole self is now more terrifying than the opinions of other people, which is freeing in itself.

Last but not least: “The only way to experience true, internal fulfilment, is to be full.” Chew on that one for a while (insert brain-exploding emoji here).

C x

One of the best pieces of advice that I ever got was, 'They always hire the right person for the job, not necessarily the best person for the job."

Nothing outside of us can heal something that was created on the inside. If it was created on the inside, it has to be healed from the inside. Therefor, nothing outside of us will ever make us feel like we’re good enough.

How can I have ownership over what I already do really well? Is fulfilment a simple matter of knowing you’re the only person who could do it? Not to everyone... but I think it is to me.

Your superpower is the one thing that, if discovered and practiced with ownership, will lead you to the people places and things that will provide you with the sense of fulfilment you’ve been searching for. 

We often discount our superpower(s) because we’re too busy wanting something else that, at the end of the day, isn’t actually a superpower, it’s a skill. We also discount and downplay our superpowers because a superpower is natural. But because it’s so natural and easy, we don’t feel like it’s anything special because we didn’t spend out blood sweat and tears cultivating it.  

Perhaps the path to fulfilment is honing your superpower. 

There is a lot of reflection in this episode. This is the episode I most needed to hear, so maybe it will be similar for you too. I think fulfilment comes from being fully YOU.

Your thoughts are always welcome...

C x

In this episode, we speak about a new way of approaching your relationship with the thought or belief ‘I’m not good enough’. We offer a new perspective, a new way of combating this belief, which is, to simply not allow it into your thoughts at all. Completely minimise it from your thought process at all. Confused? Too good to be true? Have a listen, because I think we’ve been sold a ‘solution’ that kind of feels like fighting fire with fire…