Inside Social Work by Marie Vakakis

May 18, 2022 Healthy Boundaries

Boundaries are the limits we set with other people, which indicate what we find acceptable and unacceptable in their behavior towards us.

Elements of trust - from the work of Brene Brown.

Using the acronym BRAVING

Boundaries

Reliability

Accountability

Vault

Intergtriy

Non-judgement

Generosity

Healthy boundaries are cruicial components for self-care.

Some of the advantages of healthy boundaries include having good mental health, good emotional health, avoiding burnout and being a positive influence on others behaviour.

Consequences include stress, wasted time, financial burdens and relationship issues. Whether it's in work or in our personal relationships, poor boundaries may lead to resentment, hurt, anger, and burnout. A lack of healthy boundaries can negatively impact all areas of someone's life.

Boundaries help us take care of ourselves by giving us permission to say NO to things, to not take everything on. Knowing our boundaries and setting them are two very different hurdles to overcom

Know what they are

Start by working out your limits.

Remind yourself of the benefit of sticking to them

Be assertive and Communicate them

Communicate them often, frequently and clearly. This is your responsibility

People can’t read your mind. This make take practice to implement.

Try the following or other similar situartions to practice setting boundaries and being assertive.

Did the barrister get your coffee order wrong? Ask them for what you actually ordered.
Is a family member intruding on your dating life? Say that you'd rather talk about something else.
Is a work colleague pushing his or her work onto you? Remind them that it isn't within your scope, you are busy with your own work, and direct them to someone who will be of better service.
Did a friend do something to hurt you? Ask them to meet you for lunch and explain why their words or actions hurt you.
Someone inviting you to an event and you’re too busy to attend? Let them know ‘’Thanks for thinking of me, but I'm going to say no this time.”