Emily joined me today to talk about her loss of grieveing of her grandad, and incredidly close friend. Talking about grieving someone young and processing loss in your 20s from some in their 20s is a conversation and experience is something that is hard to talk about, Emily was so brave to open and be real on the episode. I am extremely proud of her strength and not just for turning up for the podcast, but for turning up for herself.

For anyone that needs this...

dating has always had its challenges, communicating is a whole different story. I am seeing myself grow much more confident in telling people who I see how I feel and effectively seeking people who can align with my needs. Does this always work? Of course not!

SO I DID AN ULTRA MARATHON

i am so unbelievably excited and proud that I did an ultra marathon. I’ve been training for this since January and me and my friend Liam completed it. our journey took us from Manchester to Liverpool and in seven hours and six minutes we completed that journey. Running has always been my mental health saviour kept me grounded and made me exactly who I am and made me strong and sharing this journey is so important. I hope this is inspires anybody who is thinking of taking up running, you can do hard things!

I struggle so much more these days when I experience a 'real autistic moment'. Because I forget. Because I manage so well. I craved to be like 'everyone else' so now that in adulthood same thing I couldn't do as a child I can do now. I find I get so upset with myself more because I can manage it better. 

I am forever feeding the inner child Martha to be 'like everyone else'. 

Blog post - ⁠I ran out again⁠

This might be one of my favourite episodes. It can be hard to find the right words for me, my inside voice can be so eloquent and then facing a microphone, even I lose all my meaning sometimes.

I found this episode flowed more than normal. The Saturday struggles I've always felt, my binge update (still such a hard topic to talk about) and staying in your lane with self-development.

I felt quite raw a few episodes ago, needing to step back and look after myself has helped me feel more comfortable to show up.

ALSO* I have some new blog posts on the original - Martha's Mind

My lovely guest, Tudor, came into the space and shared his inside voice about moving countries and experiencing loneliness. The differences in how other countries talk and approach mental health chats and Tudor's appreciation for sleep!!

So I am one week from finishing my masters. I feel the cloud of purpose sink in over me again. I felt this when I came back to the UK a year ago. Not having a purpose in life is a really subtle but intense feeling. It grabs you by the ankles, as you tr to wake up and get going. Having the extra weight on your every move of 'what do to today?' was the reason I did this masters in the first place. It was the reason I started this podcast!!

I am scared again.

Before you all *sigh* that you think this is about running. It is. But its more than that. For anyone that is starting out, let me tell you, running isnt really about running. And if you think it is, listen to this.

It was only because I was writing in my journal. yes we need private moments for ourselves. but I think if we don't ever share those real vulnerable (and yes uncomfortable) feelings, how can we connect to feel less alone? So I am taking the first plunge knowing and hoping others feel the same too.

Peaches has been my friend for a very long time (the exact amount said in the episode!). And when I first met her everything was normal. She became increasingly very ill. She developed Crohn's and as a result, her life changed. Peaches discusses navigating early teenagehood with a chronic illness, how she manages her condition and what life looks like now for her.

Peaches also has a podcast - Branching Out Podcast