Inspiring Marriages

web: www.inspiringmarriages.net

email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_field_texas

Marriage:  

·  A man and a woman

·  Physically and emotionally intimate

·  Working together in a shared life to help each other realize their visions and dreams

·  Walking with God to fulfill their callings and goals

4 He answered, “Have you not read that he who created them from the beginning made them male and female, 5 and said, ‘Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? 6 So they are no longer two but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6 ESV

“Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. Genesis 2:24 ESV

dâbaq, daw-bak'; (Hebrew): a primitive root; properly, to impinge, i.e. cling or adhere; figuratively, to catch by pursuit:—abide fast, cleave (fast together), follow close (hard after), be joined (together), keep (fast), overtake, pursue hard, stick, take.

The idea of a marriage being free from outside influences suggests creating a strong, resilient bond between spouses that isn't swayed by external pressures or opinions.

Mutual respect is essential for any successful relationship. It serves as the foundation for trust, understanding, and love. This means treating your spouse with dignity and consideration, valuing each other’s opinions and feelings. Both parties should feel heard, appreciated, and supported, fostering a strong bond between them.

“Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her,”  Ephesians 5:25 NASB1995

 “But [However; In any case; or To sum up] each one of you must love his wife as he loves himself, and a wife must ·respect [reverence; v. 21] her husband.”  Ephesians 5:33 EXB

Mutual respect is a key component of a healthy marriage. When it's lacking, relationships can suffer, and couples may experience: 

Dismissive behaviors: These can include belittling your spouse ignoring their feelings or making sarcastic comments. 

Loss of communication: Disrespect can lead to a loss of emotional intimacy and communication. 

Stress: This can prevent people from functioning in their daily lives. 

Conflict: When couples can't resolve differences, it can lead to anger and frustration, which can further erode respect. 

Mutual respect can be improved by: 

Understanding what respect means to your spouse 

Accepting your spouse's differences 

Agreeing to disagree on issues without holding a grudge (to a point)

“Do two walk together, unless they have agreed to meet?  Amos 3: ESV

Active listening

Speak kindly

Validate each other’s feelings

Apologize

Avoid blame

Practice gratitude

Be honest

Treat each other with dignity and respect

Friendship Builder:

Go on a mini-marriage retreat

web: www.inspiringmarriages.net

email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_fields_texas

Marriage:

• A man and a woman

• Physically and emotionally intimate

• Working together in a shared life to help each other realize their visions and dreams

• Walking with God to fulfill their callings and goals

“He replied, Have you never read that He Who made them from the beginning made them male and female. And said, For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and shall be united firmly (joined inseparably) to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let not man put asunder (separate).” Matthew 19:4-6 AMPC

“Then Adam said: “At last! One like me! Her bones were formed from my bones, and her flesh from my flesh! This one will be called ‘Woman,’ for she was taken from man.” For this reason, a man leaves his father and his mother to be unselfishly attached to his wife. They become one flesh as a new family! The man and his wife felt no shame, unaware that they were both naked. Genesis 2:23-25 TPT

“Attached to” : dabaq (Hebrew): “in his wife” – “to follow hard after” or “attaching oneself to another as an act of unselfishness”. The opposite of looking out for yourself.

Opening the Lines of Communication

The idea of a marriage being free from outside influences suggests creating a strong, resilient bond between spouses that isn't swayed by external pressures or opinions.

Open and Honest Communication: Maintaining honest and open communication between spouses to address any external pressures or concerns and to strengthen the relationship.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue…” Proverbs 18:21 KJV

“Therefore, putting away lying, “Let each one of you speak truth with his neighbor,” for we are members of one another.” Ephesians 4:25 NKJV

The Foundation Of Love: Why Communication Is Key In Marriage - The Healthy Marriage

When there is a lack of open and honest communication, the following may happen: relationship breakdown, emotional disconnect, lack of understanding, increased conflict and loss of trust.

Communication is more than just exchanging words. It is about understanding each over on a deep level.

Your spouse MUST be given the right to speak up without penalty. Always better to say something than to not especially if your spouse doesn’t see it.

NOT saying something is the same thing as NOT speaking the truth

Understanding Communication

1. Active listening – respect and understanding

2. Use “I” statements

3. Seeking to understand

4. Be aware of non-verbal cues, tone of voice, facial expressions

5. Build companionship with open dialogue and meaningful activities

6. Conflict resolution – avoid blame, open to compromise, seek help

Benefits of Communication

1. Enhances intimacy

2. Builds trust

3. Aids in conflict resolution

Watch a marriage teaching together on Youtube

(22) XO Marriage - YouTube

web: www.inspiringmarriages.net

email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_fields_texas

Marriage:

• A man and a woman

• Physically and emotionally intimate

• Working together in a shared life to help each other realize their visions and dreams

• Walking with God to fulfill their callings and goals

“And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.” Matthew 19:4-6 NASB1995

“At last!” the man exclaimed. “This one is bone from my bone, and flesh from my flesh! She will be called ‘woman,’ because she was taken from ‘man.’” This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one. Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame. " Genesis 2:23-25 New Living Translation

The idea of a marriage being free from outside influences suggests creating a strong, resilient bond between spouses that isn't swayed by external pressures or opinions.

Establishing clear boundaries with family, friends, and work to ensure that these relationships support rather than undermine the marriage.

“Watch over your heart with all diligence, For from it flow the springs of life.” Proverbs 4:23 NASB1995

“Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.” Proverbs 4:23 NIV

a. You may have to separate from family/friends who actively attempt to sabotage your marriage

b. But at the same time you can’t cut off spouse from family/friends (unless they are destructive)

c. Never have intimate/secret conversation with someone of the opposite sex

d. You cannot spend time alone with a person of the opposite sex

1 Thessalonians 5:22 KJV “Abstain from all appearance of evil.”

e. Your spouse must be given the right to speak up to you if he/she sees a dangerous boundary violation

Web: www.inspiringmarriages.net

Email: [email protected]

Music: @joseph_fields_texas

Marriage:  

·     A man and a woman

·     Physically and emotionally intimate

·     Working together in a shared life to help each other realize their visions and dreams

·     Walking with God to fulfill their callings and goals

 “And He answered and said, “Have you not read that He who created them from the beginning made them male and female, and said, ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh’?  So they are no longer two, but one flesh. What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate.”  Matthew 19:4-6 NASB1995

“Haven’t you read the Scriptures about creation?” Jesus replied. “The Creator made us male and female from the very beginning.”   Matthew 19:4 TPT

“Jesus answered, `Have you not read this? From the time God first made people, he made them a man and a woman.” Matthew 19:4 Worldwide English (WE)

Commitment: Exclusivity signifies a mutual commitment to each other, fostering a deeper sense of trust and security. It means that the couple agrees to prioritize each other in their romantic and emotional lives.

o   Never threaten to leave

o   Communicate effectively

o   Learn your spouse’s love language

·       

Intimacy: An exclusive relationship allows for a unique level of emotional and physical intimacy, where spouses can share their deepest thoughts, feelings, and experiences without concerns about outside interference.

o   Pray regularly together

o   30 minutes of focused communication every day

o  Don’t wait until the last possible minute to get ready for bed

o   Schedule dates and physical affection

Trust and Loyalty: Exclusivity builds a foundation of trust and loyalty, which is crucial for a strong and lasting relationship. It helps spouses feel valued and supported in their journey together.

o   Follow through on your promises even to your own hurt

o   Honest communication (when you said x, I felt y)

o   Be consistent

o   Admit mistakes

Focus on the Relationship: By being exclusive, spouses can focus on developing their relationship and working through challenges together, rather than being distracted or divided by outside influence.

o   Battle difficulties together

o   Think of your spouse when making decisions

o   Work together on things: kids, pets, housework, yardwork

Shared Goals: Exclusivity often aligns with shared goals and values, including those related to family, finances, and life plans, creating a cohesive marriage.

o  Talk about your dreams and aspirations

o  Create goals together

o  Encourage each other to grow

Website: www.inspiringmarriages.net

Email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_fields_texas

Wife: Invest in Your Husband: Physical Affection 

And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Ephesians 5:2 ESV 

And walk in love, [esteeming and delighting in one another] as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a slain offering and sacrifice to God [for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance. Ephesians 5:2 AMPC 

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). Ephesians 5:21 AMPC 

Wives, it is time for us to walk in love toward our husbands at a new level. We know that the Bible teaches us to love one another, but, we can tend to let the faults or imperfections of our husbands bring them lower in our esteem. We are the number one source of encouragement for them on this earth as their partner in life, so we cannot allow ourselves to hold onto anything that undermines our respect for them. God gave us to our husbands to refresh them and build them up in a unique way and to meet needs that no one else can meet. 

Jeff and I love being each other’s best friend. We would rather go somewhere together than with any other friends that we have. Wives, you can take an interest in one of your husband’s hobbies or activities. If he loves going to baseball or football games or watches them on TV, then join in and learn about the game and cheer for his favorite teams. 

“Men want to be best friends with their wives.”-Jimmy Evans 

“Your husband will never be as open with you as when he’s having fun with you.”-Jimmy Evans 

We have great times of conversation when we are just doing something for fun. I have actually learned new things about Jeff while we were driving around or enjoying an activity together. 

Wives, we have the gift of making a house into a home. Some call it “the gift of nesting.” Even if you didn’t realize it, the comfortable surroundings and decorative touches in your home make it a peaceful haven for your husband. It is so helpful for him to come home to find order rather than chaos. He deals with plenty of stress factors out in the world, so help him to relax and be refreshed when he comes home. 

Of course, it is not entirely up to us to keep the house clean and take care of the children. Men can do their part to get things organized and help with housework. But, when we do recognize that he needs support at home, there will be less stress on your relationship. You can even tackle those projects together. 

website: www.inspiringmarriages.net

email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_fields_texas

And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Ephesians 5:2 ESV

And walk in love, [esteeming and delighting in one another] as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a slain offering and sacrifice to God [for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance. Ephesians 5:2 AMPC

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). Ephesians 5:21 AMPC

Wives, it is time for us to walk in love toward our husbands at a new level. We know that the Bible teaches us to love one another, but, we can tend to let the faults or imperfections of our husbands bring them lower in our esteem. We are the number one source of encouragement for them on this earth as their partner in life, so we cannot allow ourselves to hold onto anything that undermines our respect for them. God gave us to our husbands to refresh them and build them up in a unique way and to meet needs that no one else can meet.

As women, we go through many phases of life and experience many changes in our bodies over the years. Even if we think we are no longer as attractive to our husbands, they still see us as beautiful. Men usually have more drive for physical intimacy than their wives, but we can meet our husband’s need by committing to have regular time together. You can both discuss what works for you as a couple so that each of you are satisfied with intimacy in every area: spiritually, emotionally, mentally, and physically.

If you have factors that are affecting your health or your ability to have physical intimacy, then discuss these things with your husband. It is much better for him to know what is affecting you. It will give him the opportunity to adjust his expectations. The most important thing is for both of you to be considerate of each other. When we do, we can “esteem and delight in one another” as Ephesians 5, verse 2 says. It is so much better than having one or both of you constantly disappointed or frustrated.

Marriage Builder:

Visit a state park

Web: www.inspiringmarriages.net

Email: [email protected]

Music: @joseph_fields_texas

And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God. Ephesians 5:2 ESV

And walk in love, [esteeming and delighting in one another] as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a slain offering and sacrifice to God [for you, so that it became] a sweet fragrance. Ephesians 5:2 AMPC

Be subject to one another out of reverence for Christ (the Messiah, the Anointed One). Ephesians 5:21 AMPC

Wives, it is time for us to walk in love toward our husbands at a new level.

We know that the Bible teaches us to love one another, but, we can tend to let the faults or imperfections of our husbands bring them lower in our esteem. We are the number one source of encouragement for them on this earth as their partner in life, so we cannot allow ourselves to hold onto anything that undermines our respect for them. God gave us to our husbands to refresh them and build them up in a unique way and to meet needs that no one else can meet.

The man who finds a wife finds a treasure, and he receives favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22 NLT

Honor and Respect

Wives, be subject (be submissive and adapt yourselves) to your own husbands as [a service] to the Lord. Ephesians 5:22 AMPC

Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. Ephesians 5:22 ESV

Submit (Webster 1828) - To yield, resign or surrender to the power, will or authority of another

Not like an enemy surrender. No one loses here.

When I was single, the Lord showed me how to regard Jesus as my husband: to look to Him for leadership, advice, direction, and companionship. I adored Jesus and didn’t want to do anything apart from Him! Once I married Jeff, I learned to transfer that honor to him as my husband. I submitted myself to his leadership and respected his ways of thinking and decision-making.

When a wife can show honor to her husband as she would to the Lord, he knows that he is a leader and has confidence to move forward in life. However, a lack of respect from a wife can be devastating to a man.

We need to tell our husbands how well he cares for us and for our children. We need to encourage them when they have challenges to overcome without telling them what to do. With our support, husbands can seek God for answers to problems and be confident in taking action.

Website: www.inspiringmarriages.net

Email: [email protected]

Music: @joseph_fields_texas

“God will never be mocked! For what you plant will always be the very thing you harvest.”  Galatians 6:7 TPT

“And let us not lose heart and grow weary and faint in acting nobly and doing right, for in due time and at the appointed season we shall reap, if we do not loosen and relax our courage and faint.”  Galatians 6:9 AMPC

Others words for sow: planting, investing, enriching

Our role is to be a faithful sower.  Leave the results up to God.

“Death and life are in the power of the tongue”  Proverbs 18:21 NKJV

“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,  gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.”  Galatians 5:22-23 NASB1995

Husbands, buckle up! It's time to dive into an exhilarating journey of love and service toward your wives. Picture this: every action, every response overflowing with genuine, sincere, and passionate devotion. It's not about what she does or says—it's about your unwavering commitment to love her fiercely, to serve her with all your heart, and to respond to her needs with utmost care and dedication. This is more than just a role—it's a thrilling adventure of selfless love, where each moment spent loving her becomes a testament to your deep and enduring commitment. So, gear up, husbands, and let your actions speak louder than any words—because loving and serving your wife passionately is the ultimate adventure of a lifetime!

Address her basic needs and keep in mind her primary love language.

Imagine this scene: in the quiet of the evening, with soft candlelight casting gentle shadows, you take her hands in yours, gazing deeply into her eyes. With a tender smile, you whisper those three magical words: "I love you." You don't just say it; you make her feel it in every syllable, every breath. But it doesn't stop there. You continue, expressing your heartfelt gratitude for having her by your side, as your wife. You speak of the warmth she brings into your life, the strength she inspires in you, and the security she wraps around your heart. Your words are like a love poem, painting a picture of appreciation and adoration that envelops her soul. In that moment, she feels safe—safe in your love, safe in your commitment, safe in the knowledge that you cherish her beyond measure. And as you hold her close, whispering sweet assurances of love and gratitude, the bond between you deepens, and romance blooms anew.

a.  Communicatedirectly and honestly.  No mind games

b.  Bereliable.

c.  Respect her opinions, feelings and choices

d.  Include her when you are making decisions

e.  Know how to admit mistakes and ask for forgiveness

Your wife needs to know that she’s more to you than just a sex object and that you’re connected to her on a higher level than just sex. The more non-sexual soft affection women get, the more sexual they become.

hint: hold her hand, neck rubs, foot rubs, stroke her hair, touch her arm when you talk to her, rub her shoulders, rub her back, hugs, etc.

Jimmy Evans says, “Women don’t want headlines. They don’t want grunt and groans. She connects to your world and your heart through communication.”  She doesn’t want facts, she wants to know how you feel. Men, your wife isn’t wired like you are.  Everything is connected.  Hold your wife.  Talk to her. Her heart will open to you and to intimacy on a level that you haven’t experienced before.

Throughout history, women have often been relegated to second-class status. However, with you, that narrative changes entirely. Jimmy Evans says that women want their husbands to be the loving initiator in these areas:

Children

Romance

Finances

Spiritual Matters

Initiate conversations in these four areas.

Web site: www.inspiringmarriages.net

email: [email protected]

music: @joseph_fields_texas

“Consider the birds – do you think they worry about their existence? They don’t plant or reap or store up food, yet your heavenly Father provides them each with food. Aren’t you much more valuable to your Father than they?” Matthew 6:26 TPT

Speiro (spi’-ro) To sow, scatter, seed

“As long as earth exists there will always be seasons of planting and harvest, cold and heat, summer and winter, day and night” Genesis 8:22 TPT

“The sower sows the word” Mark 4:14 NKJV

“The farmer plants God’s message in people [The sower sows the word].” Mark 4:14 EXB

The concept of sowing and reaping is deeply rooted in biblical wisdom. It emphasizes that our actions have consequences, both positive and negative. Here are some relevant Bible verses on sowing and reaping:

“Do not be deceived, God is not mocked; for whatever a man sows, this he will also reap.” Galatians 6:7 NASB1995

Throughout history, this verse has often been interpreted negatively: "whatever a man sows, that he will also reap." This interpretation suggests that negative outcomes are a direct result of bad behavior, akin to the concept of karma. But stand on this verse for a bountiful harvest.

‘Give, and it will be given to you. They will pour into your lap a good measure—pressed down, shaken together, and running over. For by your standard of measure it will be measured to you in return.”” Luke 6:38 NASB1995

“Here’s my point. A stingy sower will reap a meager harvest, but the one who sows from a generous spirit will reap an abundant harvest.” 2 Corinthians 9:6 TPT

Remember, sowing love, kindness, and forgiveness in relationships can yield a beautiful harvest. Whether it’s in marriage or any other connection, our actions matter

How We Sow (Plant) in Our Marriage:

The Five Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman

https://5lovelanuages.com/

What are The 5 Love Languages?

1. Acts of service

2. Receiving Gifts

3. Quality Time

4. Word of Affirmation

5. Physical Touch

Understand this: in a marriage relationship what you invest into the relationship determines what you'll receive from it.

In simpler terms, how often are you investing in your spouse each week?

How often do we pick up the phone and text our partners, "When God created beauty, He spent the entire day crafting you"? Or “you are absolutely beautiful.”

How often do wives text their husbands and say, "When God made men of God, He blessed me with the best man alive"? If these are the seeds we're planting in each other's hearts, then that's exactly what we'll harvest in return.

Tell each other often how grateful you are. And why.

True love always asks, "What can I do for you?" It's selfless. Lust, on the other hand, asks, "What can you do for me?" True love goes to great lengths to benefit the beloved, no matter the cost. If you desire the best from your spouse, you must speak the best into them. Speak into your spouse what you want to see in them.

website: www.inspiringmarriages.net

music: @joseph_fields_texas

email: [email protected]

“Then God said, “Behold, I have given you every plant yielding seed that is on the surface of all the earth, and every tree which has fruit yielding seed; it shall be food for you;” Genesis 1:29 NASB1995

KJV: “herb bearing seed” “it shall be for meat”

Voice: “food and nourishment”

Eseb (eh’seb) : herb, herbage, grass, green plant

akla (ok-law) food:—consume, devour, eat, food, meat.

“Look at the birds in the sky. They do not store food for winter. They don’t plant gardens. They do not sow or reap—and yet, they are always fed because your heavenly Father feeds them. And you are even more precious to Him than a beautiful bird. If He looks after them, of course He will look after you.” Matthew 6:26 VOICE

“Consider the birds– do you think they worry about their existence? They don’t plant or reap or store up food, yet your heavenly Father provides them each with food. Aren’t you much more valuable to your Father than they?” Matthew 6:26 TPT

“Consider the lilies, how they grow. They neither [wearily] toil nor spin nor weave; yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory (his splendor and magnificence) was not arrayed like one of these.” Luke 12:27 AMPC

“…won’t he provide for you the clothes you need – you of little faith” So then, forsake your worries! Why would you say, ‘What will we eat?’ or ‘What will we drink?’ or ‘What will we wear?’ For that is what the unbelievers chase after. Doesn’t your heavenly Father already know the things your bodies require? So above all, constantly seek God’s kingdom and his righteousness, and all these less important things will be given to you abundantly”. Matthew 6:30-33 TPT

1. There is no “his money” and no “her money”. Although there should be a line in the budget where each of you get fun money.

2. You have to be in agreement in all financial matters (one flesh). If one of your kids asks to go to McDonalds, “go ask your _____” should never be an option.

3. We have to pull together for the common goal as a team.

4. Invest in Financial Peace University

Financial Peace University - Ramsey (ramseysolutions.com)