it’s nothing. I’m fine.

What happens when the ground shifts under work you've built for over a decade? Kim Harris, founder of Distinctive Voice Consulting, doesn't have just one answer — she has several.

In this conversation, Kim takes us through the full arc of her career: two decades of facilitating equity and inclusion training for organizations, nonprofits, and civic groups across the country, and what it's meant to navigate a landscape that's changed dramatically around that work. But this isn't a story about loss. It's a story about range. Kim has spent years building alongside her DEI practice — coaching first-generation student-athletes and their families through the confusing world of college recruiting and scholarships, guiding people through life transitions with the same steady presence she brought to her ministry work in grief and divorce recovery, and lending her voice — literally — to audiobooks, corporate training, and broadcast work shaped by decades on air.

We talk about what it takes to hold that many threads at once, how her own life — growing up in Los Angeles, living overseas, working internationally — shaped her gift for helping people bridge difference, and what she wants every client to feel in the very first conversation, no matter which door they walked through to find her.

If you've ever had to rebuild what "your work" means without losing who you are in the process, this one's for you.

Learn more about Kim and her work at distinctivevoiceconsulting.com.

SHOW NOTES

What happens when the fight is technically over, but you don't feel like you won anything yet?

Your partner wants to talk about the relationship. Again. And something in you just... closes. You're not trying to be cold. You're not trying to hurt anyone. But the more they push, the more you need space — and you're not entirely sure why.

In this episode, Amy Prieb, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, turns the lens on avoidant attachment — the style that gets the least sympathy and is probably the least understood. If you listened to last week's episode on anxious attachment and thought "that sounds like my partner," this one will help you understand what's happening on the other side of that dynamic.

You'll learn where avoidant attachment comes from, what it actually feels like from the inside, and what growth looks like when closeness has always felt more threatening than safe. Spoiler: it doesn't mean you don't care. It means you learned to need less — and that made sense once.

You sent the text. They haven't responded. And now you're spiraling — replaying the last conversation, checking your phone, wondering if you said something wrong. You know it's probably fine. But knowing that doesn't make the feeling stop.

If that sounds familiar, this episode is for you.

Amy Prieb, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, breaks down anxious attachment — what it is, where it comes from, and how it quietly runs the show in your closest relationships. You'll learn why the reassurance never quite sticks, what protest behaviors actually are, and why you're not too much — your nervous system just learned to work overtime.

This isn't about fixing yourself. It's about finally understanding yourself.

You know that low hum of pressure — successful on the outside, but something feels off on the inside? Mindset coach Mindi Huebner has spent her career helping high-achieving women name exactly that gap, and in this episode, she joins Amy to talk about what's actually underneath it.

Mindi is the creator of the 24 Karat Identity framework, and her work lives at the intersection of subconscious beliefs, self-worth, and success. Together, she and Amy dig into the "achieve to be valuable" programming so many women are running without realizing it — and what it costs us in our closest relationships. Because when you're performing connection instead of receiving it, even the people who love you most never quite get to know the real you.

They talk about why you can't strategy your way out of an identity problem, what shifts in a woman's relationships when she stops proving and starts belonging, and how rest became something structural in Mindi's life rather than a reward she had to earn. Mindi also brings her signature blend of practical, no-nonsense coaching and unapologetic intuition — and yes, the crystals come up.

If you've ever felt like the capable, together one who's quietly exhausted from holding it all, this conversation will feel like someone finally saying the thing out loud.

If you've ever listened to this podcast and wondered where the music comes from — this episode is for you. Joel Dobbins, the musician behind every note you hear on It's Nothing. I'm Fine., joins Amy in the studio for a conversation about music, meaning, and what it's like to build a life around something you love.

You may remember Joel from an earlier episode, where he and his wife Emily talked about holding the joy of parenting alongside a world that so often feels like it's on fire. This time, it's just Joel and his guitar. He shares the role music has played in his life — as an outlet, an anchor, and a way of staying connected to himself and the people he loves — and then he does something we've never done on this show before: he plays several songs live, right there in the studio.

There's something about live music that gets underneath words. Whether you're a musician yourself, someone who processes life through songs, or you just want to finally meet the person whose melodies have been keeping you company all this time, this one is worth listening to all the way through.

Music, creativity, and connection — with a live soundtrack.

"Grow up, Josh. You're being an asshole and I won't have it." Amy actually said that — and privately, she was afraid she'd married a monster. She hadn't. But it took years, a Hold Me Tight® workshop, and couples counseling to figure out what was really going on.

In this episode, we tell the whole story: Josh growing up as a missionary kid who absorbed the message that he was unimportant, unlovable, and last on the list — and how that old wound showed up in our marriage wearing a disguise. It didn't look like hurt. It looked like anger, jealousy, and ultimatums. And it landed squarely on Amy's own raw spot: the fear of being abandoned.

We replay our worst pattern in slow motion — the trigger, the protest, the counterattack, the round-and-round — and share the moment we finally saw that the cycle was the enemy, not each other. If you've ever looked at your partner mid-fight and thought "who ARE you?", this one's for you.

You'll learn what a raw spot is, why anger is often a question in disguise, and how to spot the cycle running your own relationship — because you can't fight an enemy you can't see.

Grab Amy's free guide: The Cycle Running Your Relationship and How to See It Clearly → amypie2.gumroad.com

Show Notes

Amy Prieb, LMFT, is an Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT) specialist practicing in Bellingham, Washington.

Joel and Emily are in their thirties, raising two little ones, ages 5 and 7,  in a home built around intention, gentleness, and a whole lot of love. Emily studied sociology and women's studies, and that lens shows up everywhere: in how she parents, how she grieves, how she makes sense of a world that keeps getting harder to explain. Joel is a musician (yes, that's his music you've been hearing on this podcast — and we'll do a whole episode with just him soon).

But today, I wanted them both. Together.

Because what they're navigating right now isn't one thing. It's a beautiful childhood and a heartbreaking news cycle, happening at the same time, in the same body, on the same Tuesday. It's gentle parenting and real disagreements. It's community and isolation. It's joy that feels almost guilty and grief that doesn't go away.

We talk about the childhood they're trying to build for their children. About what happens when parents don't agree in the moment. About how much truth you tell a small child about a country that's changing. About whether you can raise kids to be empathetic and brave without robbing them of their sense of wonder. About what this moment is doing to their marriage — and where they find each other inside all of it.

This one is tender. It's real. And if you're a parent carrying this same dual weight right now, I think it might feel like a deep exhale.

What happens when 700+ women over 50 put on bloomers, hit the court, and refuse to be invisible? You get the Granny Basketball League — and apparently, you get one of the most quietly revolutionary communities in the country.

This week, I'm sitting down with Barb, the founder of the Granny Basketball League, and Corrie, a player who found something there she didn't know she was looking for. We talk about how a league built on 1920s rules (no running, no jumping, two dribbles — and yes, the bloomers are mandatory) has become a lifeline for women navigating the second half of life.

We get into the origin story — how Barb's father's memories of early women's basketball in Iowa sparked something that grew into 53+ teams across the country. We talk about what those "gentler" rules actually do for women's bodies and spirits, why the "granny" framing might be more liberating than it sounds, and what it means to be seen, to play, and to belong when culture keeps telling you it's time to step back.

Corrie gets honest about the part of her that was nervous to show up — and what she found on the other side of that door. We talk about friendship, bodies, purpose, and the weird magic of a parking lot conversation that changes everything.

If you've ever thought that sounds amazing, but not for me — this episode is for you.

www.grannybasketball.com

Katie went speed dating. The men were older than advertised. One of them slipped her his number anyway — against the actual rules. And somehow, this became the perfect jumping-off point for everything.

Michelle and Katie — two women in their 40s navigating the wildly weird world of midlife dating — are back for round two, and this episode goes deep. They talk about what it actually means to love yourself before you look for love from someone else (spoiler: it's not just a bumper sticker), how emotional self-regulation is the skill nobody taught us and everybody needs, and why building a secure attachment with yourself is the real foundation under every relationship you'll ever have.

They also roast the apps. Extensively. With joy.

And yes — by the end of this episode, they will have half-seriously proposed starting their own dating service. You'll understand why.

In this episode:

If you're dating after divorce, re-entering the dating scene in your 40s or 50s, healing your attachment patterns, or just trying to figure out who you are before you find someone to be with — pull up a chair.