Jason Voorees Biography Flash a weekly Biography.
Well, hi. You’re listening to the Jason Voorees Biography Flash—the only podcast brave and/or sleep-deprived enough to comb through the internet, your Twitter draft folder, and the weird corners of Reddit just to keep you abreast of every cough, grunt, and machete swing from Camp Crystal Lake’s most famous (and only?) resident. I’m Marcus “Marc” Ellery. And, full disclosure: If you were looking for someone less biased than a man who owns at least three hockey masks and refers to his houseplants as “the great stalkers,” you came to the wrong place.
Let’s start with the big news, because 2025 is absolutely the year of Voorheesian Renaissance—or, as my therapist calls it, “unhealthy fixation.” First up, the big digital crossover event: according to multiple gaming sites, Jason Voorees is now officially hacking and slashing his way through the Battle Pass of Fortnite’s Fortnitemares, thanks to an update that went live in time for this year’s Halloween. And let’s be real, there’s something deeply poetic about a man who couldn’t even swim in the movies now dominating both land and water in a game that turns all of us into cannon fodder. The “Jason Voorhees Medallion” is up for grabs, apparently granting you the kind of silent killer perks I wish my ex gave me. Defeat him, and you unlock sneaky abilities you can use to terrorize other players—or, you know, just finally prove you’ve got what it takes to survive in the Voorhees-verse. The Internet, naturally, is melting down over the skin’s details—reactive blood splatter on the hockey mask, machete mythic weapon—typical Tuesday.
But wait, it’s not just Fortnite. Call of Duty: The Haunting just rolled out, and according to their own official blog, you can now stalk your teammates (or enemies, if you’re feeling charitable) as Jason Voorees himself. There’s a “Slash Deathmatch” mode where two lucky winners each round get to wield that iconic machete. And, for the tactical crowd, there’s even a “Tactical Jason” Ultra Skin—perfect for those times you want to look good while you’re terrorizing a map. The event is packed with horror icons, but to be honest, I think we all know that Jason is the true MVP. The real kicker? This is all thanks to the newly launched “Jason Universe,” which is apparently the official rebrand for the franchise. So, as of now, the Voorhees family is, officially, a cinematic universe. I never thought I’d see the day where Jason’s more marketable than the cast of Friends Reunion, but here we are.
Of course, nothing brings the memes like good old-fashioned cinematic canon warfare. According to Bloody Disgusting and CBR, Freddy vs Jason is having a streaming renaissance, with HBO making it a marquee title in their Halloween lineup. The debates are raging: “Who would win in a fight?” “Do dream blades beat machetes?” “Does Jason ever sleep?”—you know, the big questions. Meanwhile, the “Crystal Lake” TV series—remember, this is a Pamela Voorhees origin story—keeps simmering in production hell, but honestly, I can’t wait to see what kind of hot mess we get. The budget is reportedly so big, it could buy a dozen summer camps.
On social media, Jason’s trending every Halloween, but this year, it’s not just nostalgia—the gaming crossovers are sparking new memes, from “If you see Jason in Fortnite, just log off” to “Me watching my friend get Jasoned in Call of Duty and pretend it’s fine.” There’s even a minor controversy about whether a reactive, bleeding mask is “too much” for kids—because, apparently, being bludgeoned to death by a cartoon bus was fine.
On the actual new-film front, Horror, Inc. is promising a new movie and video game, and… honestly, at this point, just take my money. The only thing hotter than Jason’s reboot status is the legal drama over the franchise rights, but that’s a story for another episode—if I can work up the courage to actually read 45 pages of legal documents, which I can’t.
Thanks for tuning in to this episode of Jason Voorees Biography Flash. If you want more deep dives into the utterly ridiculous, deeply weird, and sometimes actually meaningful corners of fictional celebrity, please subscribe. Never miss an update on Jason Voorees—or, you know, any fictional character with the decency to haunt a franchise for decades without ever signing an autograph (or a union card). For more incredible biographies, just search “Biography Flash” wherever you get your podcasts. Until next time, keep your back to the wall, your machete sharp, and your therapist on speed dial.
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