1) Decorated your body with 5 or more tats.

2) Took 14 Senators to task.

3) Sustained injuries in both urban and natural environments. (*Brownie points if you were hit by a truck while falling down a mountain.)

4) Hired a cop to train your dog.

5) Oversees the most respected, beloved, lambasted, and loathed newspaper in the nation.

I am not implying that Jill Abramson, the Executive Editor of The New York Times, works in isolation. It would be impossible to deliver such a critical resource on so many platforms across continents without a gifted team of journalists, editors, technologists, videographers, photographers, graphic designers, copywriters, printers, and the good Samaritans who deliver papers uphill both ways. Still, managing all of these moving parts is a feat in and of itself, especially in the digital age.