Journal Gently: Helping Introverted Women Find Healing After Grief, Hurt, and Trauma

(There are a few technical glitches in here. I apologize in advance!)

What wounds do you carry around with you?

I have scars on my arm from a childhood disease, places where the skin is darker than the rest. For you, it might be a physical scar from an experience that left you scraped and bleeding. 

Or it might be something deeper: a fear of close relationships, the ever-present sting of betrayal, the feeling like you don’t belong.

On today’s episode I speak with Russell Joyce about how God can use these wounds in our lives to bring both freedom and healing.

Russell is the national director of church planting for The Foursquare Church and senior pastor of Faith Center in Eugene, Oregon. He’s also the co-host of the Same Jesus podcast. But today I chat with him as the author of his book, His Face Like Mine. 

The foundational story of the book has to do with the fact that Russell was born with a rare craniofacial disorder where the left side of his face was not formed. And as he works through the scars from that—physical, emotional, and spiritual—he discovers how God meets us in our wounds and sets us free. 

Russell and I talk about the gift of repentance, how journaling has played a role for him and how it can play a role in your own healing journey, and at the end, he shares some words to those who are walking alongside people who are healing.

This is a sacred conversation, my friends. So settle in and ask God what He has to say to you through this episode today. 

Kari

RELATED RESOURCES:

·       Russell’s book, His Face Like Mine (Amazon affiliate link)

·       Russell’s website (access his monthly meditation)

·       Russell’s Instagram

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

Do you ever have one of those moments when you know, beyond a shadow of a doubt, that God has laid something on your heart?

Maybe it’s an idea.

Maybe it’s a truth from His Word.

Maybe it’s a calling.

It is these things that I often write down in my journal. These words from God that I want to remember and hold onto and keep thinking about.

Well, I have experienced this recently, and today I want to share with you about the most important thing in my life right now. This episode will be a bit more reflective than usual as I share some of my own thoughts and ideas about what is stirring in my heart right now. And if you’re willing, I’d love for you to email me and let me know what God has placed on your heart in this season.

Kari

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 31: Why You Can't Let Failure Stop You From Reaching Out

·       Episode 35: Job the Encourager: Strengthening Those Who are Weak

·       Episode 46: Run to Win: Encouragement As We Enter the New Year

·       Episode 108: Just Because Something's Hard Doesn't Mean It's Wrong

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

Music by DappyTKeys

C.S. Lewis wrote, “You can’t see anything properly while your eyes are blurred with tears.”

And tears often come when we lose something or someone that was very important to us. The truth is, grief is something we all experience, especially when we lose someone we love, but even when we experience other loss, like the loss of a job, the death of a dream, and the end of a marriage.

Journaling can be such a helpful way to process some of these complex thoughts and feelings that often come after such a loss. Because of that, I want to review five guided journals designed specifically for those experiencing grief. 

Like last time, when we looked at guided journals for depression and anxiety, I’ll share more about each one and how it is created so you can discern if it might be a good fit for you or a friend of yours. And along the way, you’ll glean some tips and advice for journaling through grief.

Kari

>> Grief Journal Prompts

http://lovedoesthat.org/griefjournal

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

RESOURCES MENTIONED: (Amazon affiliate links)

Grief Journal: Navigating Difficulty After Loss, by Amanda McNeil

Grieving the Write Way, by Gary Roe

Even in Darkness, by Morgan Cheek

52-Week Devotional Journal for Grief, by Debbra Sell Bronstad

How to Carry What Can’t Be Fixed: A Journal for Grief, by Megan Devine

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 50: Gritty Faith in the Midst of Grief with Prayer Artist Jessy Paulson

·       Episode 55: Reflection and Journaling as a Lifelong Practice with Business Strategist Elizabeth McCravy

·       Episode 102: Sitting with Others in their Grief and Loss with Grief Coach Julie Lynn Ashley

·       Episode 142: [Journal Reviews] Guided Journals and Devotionals for Advent

·       Episode 154: [Journal Reviews] Guided Journals for Depression and Anxiety

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

Isn’t it funny how, once you get settled into a good routine, something will change that makes it out of whack? 

Your child finally starts sleeping through the night, but then they start waking up super early. Or you dedicated nights for your quiet time, but then your teenager decides to use that time to chat with you before bed. Or you theme out your work days, only to have appointments or sports or something interfere. And so you go back to the drawing board to modify your routine and make it work for you.

Not everything in life requires a major change. Sometimes it’s just changing something simple, something small. But sometimes it is, indeed, bigger than you anticipated, and you have to adjust what you are doing.

We’ve been going through some more life changes recently, and today I wanted to share a few of those with you, as well as how I’ve been re-evaluating what that means for me.

Kari

>> Join the Courageous Care Book Club Call

http://lovedoesthat.org/bookclub

RELATED RESOURCES + EPISODES:

·      Episode 103: 6 Strategies to Manage Overwhelm, Stress, and Change

·      Episode 60: When Seasons Change and You Have to Make Adjustments

·      Episode 24: An Example in Spiritual Discernment and Decision Making: Going "All In" With Love Does That

·      Episode 77: Three Prayers for Discernment: Making Difficult Choices in Difficult Seasons

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

Something that I have often struggled with as an adult is making new friends. It’s easier when you’re younger and in school. You see your classmates every day or kids from youth group each week. You’re given opportunities to interact and see if there is someone kind of like you that you could be friends with. Talk with. Hang out with.

But as an adult, time for friendships seems more limited. While we, of course, have others at church or Bible study we can turn to for fellowship and prayer, it still feels hard sometimes to find those to simply do life with.

And so we feel lonely. Left out. Like we don’t belong.

And that is part of what drew me to Sarah Westfall’s book, The Way of Belonging.

Sarah has so beautifully written about this feeling of loneliness and how to find a way to belong—or, rather, to make space for others to feel welcome and safe.

Imagine you’re sitting down with us as we ask some honest questions about what it looks like to live in community with others.

Kari

RELATED RESOURCES + EPISODES:

·       Sarah Westfall’s website

·       Sarah’s book, The Way of Belonging (Amazon affiliate link)

·       Episode 66: [Written Spiritual Direction Session] Loneliness

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care 

Music by DappyTKeys

Several years ago, my family and I got to raise a tiny caterpillar. For weeks, we hunted down milkweed to feed it. We watched it grow. And we saw it create its little chrysalis.

We even got the blessing of watching it come out of the chrysalis, and caught most of it on video. It was such a beautiful moment.

While our little pet didn’t have any major trouble, we’ve all heard, I’m sure, that if you try to help a struggling butterfly out of its chrysalis, its wings will never be strong enough to fly.

Well, there are times when that happens for us humans, too.

When we see someone who is struggling, our first instinct is often to jump in and help, but sometimes we do this to the other person’s detriment. It seems only a seasoned encourager knows when NOT to help. In other words, they know when to let the person do it for themselves.

While it appears heartless, selfish, or insensitive, it is really a deeper love than one might imagine.

Ecclesiastes 3:1 says, “For everything there is a season, a time for every activity under heaven.” It’s followed by several examples. Perhaps the most relevant verses here are: “A time to embrace and a time to turn away… A time to tear and a time to mend. A time to be quiet and a time to speak.”

These things are all good–in their own time.

So, when is it a time to help and when is it a time to refrain from helping?

Let’s explore that together here on the podcast today.

Kari

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

RELATED RESOURCES + EPISODES:

·       Jay Holland article/episode: Boulders, Backpacks, and Boundaries

·       Book: Being There, by Dave Furman (Amazon affiliate link)

·       Episode 43: When Helping Hurts: Establishing Boundaries When Caring for Others with Counselor Nicole Fryling

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

Music by DappyTKeys

A new app popped up on my phone with one of the latest updates, and it's a journaling app! Did you get it, too? Did you try it? What do you think?

I confess, even though I do some digital journaling (which I’ll talk about later in the episode), I haven’t tried any sort of journaling app yet. But I know there are several journaling apps out there. 

Have you wanted to check them out? Are you worried about the confidentiality of any of these apps? Do you think it might be cool to categorize your journal entries so you can find connected topics?

Let’s take a look at some questions you can ask yourself to discern if a digital journaling app might be a good fit for you, and if so, which one you might want to try.

Kari

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 137: 3 Easy Ways to Journal When You Don't Know What to Write About

·       Episode 146: Introduction to Journaling: Creating Your Own Journaling Routine

·       Episode 153: Can 5 Minutes Journaling Really Make a Difference?

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

In preparation for homeschool next year, I’ve been pre-reading some missionary biographies that we’ll be using for our history curriculum. And in the one on Amy Carmichael, it shared several times when she would spend the day in prayer, seeking the Lord on one question or another.

For example, should she build a house for the Bible study she led with the “shawlies”? Should she and her group of children move to this city or stay where they were? Was it time to build a nursery for the babies? 

There are times when we might feel called to spend the day in prayer, too—seeking an answer for a specific question, like Amy Carmichael did, or interceding for a friend of ours, or even just wanting to be in God’s presence in preparation for a difficult season ahead.

But what does it really mean to spend the day of prayer? How do you go about it? Where do you go? What do you do? What does it look like?

It is my hope to offer you some practical tips and suggestions today so that you, too, might spend a day in prayer with the Lord.

Kari

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 56: How to Create a Personal Spiritual Retreat (And Reflections on My Own)

·       Episode 83: Posturing Your Heart to Hear from God, Part 2: Recognize

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

When you are going through something like betrayal, depression, or deep grief, it can be hard to talk about what is going on inside of you. And I dare to say, there are times when talking doesn’t actually help the situation.

I remember when I struggled with depression in college, and every time I talked about it, it just seemed to make things worse. I felt alone. I felt like no one understood. I felt like I should be able snap out of it and move on.

Talking was not helpful to me. Have you been there?

There are times when, for some of us, talking about an experience we’ve been through just doesn’t seem to help. And it is to those specific situations that I will speak to today. What might cause this? And what can we do in situations like those? 

So please keep the context in mind, and let’s ask God to guide us through this conversation and lead us to what we need to know. 

Kari

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 49: Finding Your Stretcher Bearers: The People Who Can Help Carry You Through a Difficult Season

·       Episode 51: Who Can I Trust? Distinguishing Between Safe and Unsafe People When You Need Help

·       Episode 133: Can You Just Sit With Me? A Conversation About Grief with Natasha Smith

·       Episode 154: [Journal Reviews] Guided Journals for Depression and Anxiety

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys

When you are struggling with depression or anxiety, it can often feel heavy. Overwhelming. Hopeless.

The worries and fears you carry around can impact every aspect of your life. The sadness can overshadow every other thing around you.

I know, because I’ve been there. Have you?

And in addition to counseling or coaching or seeing a doctor, journaling has also proven quite beneficial for those experiencing depression or anxiety. There’s just something about getting things down on paper that allows you to express what’s stirring inside of you, to release some of the heaviness, or to adopt a more playful or curious attitude about something that feels very serious and heavy. 

So today, I want to review five guided journals designed specifically for those experiencing depression and anxiety. I’ll share more about each one and how it is created so you can discern if it might be a good fit for you or a friend of yours. 

Kari

>> 5-Minute Journaling Session for Anxiety

http://lovedoesthat.org/anxietyjournal

RESOURCES MENTIONED: (Amazon affiliate links)

Depression Relief Journal, by Maggie C. Vaughan

No Worries, from Bella Mente Press

My Anxiety Journal, by Sophia Joyce

Put Your Worries Here, by Lisa Schab

21-Day Prayer Journal for Anxiety and Depression, by Dr. Garrett Nogan

RELATED EPISODES:

·       Episode 122: Feeling Anxious? Try This 5-Minute Journaling Session

·       Episode 123: A Conversation with Marla Beech: Journaling as a Daily Practice

·       Episode 135: Identifying Signs You're Not Doing Well (And What You Can Do About It)

·       Episode 142: [Journal Reviews] Guided Journals and Devotionals for Advent

·       Episode 147: The Flip-Out Rule in Journaling

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 ways to encounter God on the pages of your journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Grab your copy of my Courageous Care book

http://lovedoesthat.org/care

Music by DappyTKeys