Let’s Encourage One Another was born in March 2021 as a ministry out of my work at Love Does That. The purpose of Love Does That was really to reach out to women who were hurting or grieving—and teaching you to reach out to them, too.

But the podcast is not where I started. In fact, spiritual direction is not where I started, either.

As we near the end of the year, I’ve been reflecting on the journey that God has taken me on, from starting as a sympathy gift shop as a side hustle to leaving my position in children’s ministries to serving now as a spiritual director and running the Journal Gently program.

I’m going to do something a bit unusual today and actually share pieces of my story at Love Does That through the podcast interviews I’ve done. Because if you listen to them in chronological order, you can hear what has changed since the beginning and what has stayed the same.

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Quick Link to All Podcasts: http://lovedoesthat.org/featured-on (will be updated as I’m on other shows)
• This is Legacy Podcast, episode 33: How to Help Someone Who is Hurting
• Handmade CEO Podcast, episode 49: How to Create a Business Supporting Others
• Christian Woman Leadership Podcast, episode 149: How to Give and Receive Encouragement as a Leader with Kari Bartkus
• Grant Writing Simplified Podcast, episode 41: Serving Through Ministry-Based Business
• The Care Ministry Podcast, episode 11: The Power of Standing with People Who Are Struggling
• Live It Out with the Planning Woman Podcast, episode 125: Incorporating Journaling Into Your Quiet Time with Kari Bartkus
• Halfway There Podcast, episode 284: Kari Bartkus and the Friendship of Jesus
• Bible Study Made Simple Podcast, episode 32: Imaginative Prayer with Kari Bartkus
• A Season of Caring Podcast, episode 145: Processing the Grief of Caregiving
• Episode 6: The Message That Ignited Love Does That
• Episode 24: An Example in Spiritual Discernment and Decision Making: Going "All In" With Love Does That

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30.)

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

Today, I would like to walk with you through a mini Blue Christmas service. While many churches offer these services, traditionally held on December 21, I know that not everyone does, nor can everyone attend.

And, let’s be honest, sometimes we’re not quite ready to name our losses in community with others yet. We’re still trying to come to grips with what has happened.

A Blue Christmas service is designed especially for those who have experienced loss or are suffering or lonely during the holiday season. It recognizes that not everything is “merry and bright” during Christmas. And that’s okay. We can name our losses and grief before God and meet Him in that place, even as we cling to hope that Christmas brings.

So this is what this episode is going to look like: I’m going to lead us through a short Blue Christmas service here on the podcast. I would really encourage you to find a quiet place where you can sit with God. It might be helpful to have a journal, to write down your own thoughts or things that you might hear from God during this time.

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Episode 42: Offering a Blue Christmas Service to Honor the Loss and Cling to the Hope
• Free Resource: Blue Christmas Planning Guide
• Advent Resource: When Your Silent Night Feels Empty
• The Care Ministry Podcast episode 11: The Power of Standing with People Who Are Struggling
• Excerpts of prayers taken from various places; find details on the blog post for this episode
• Background music by Dappy T Keys (YouTube Channel)

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30.)

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

In case you haven’t noticed it, we’ve kind of had a theme going on these past few weeks, and that is finding God in the silence.

So when I saw Celia Miller’s Advent devotional called Be Still & Know and have been reading about her own journey into silence and stillness, I invited her back to the podcast to share with us.

We talk about how Celia was introduced to the spiritual practice of silence, her initial response, ways we can incorporate silence into our daily lives, and why silence with God can be so powerful.

Kari

MEET CELIA:

Celia resides in Greenwood, Indiana with her husband, Max, and two furbabies, Henry and Hattie. She’s an avid pursuer of good storytelling and loves to spend her free time getting lost in a good book or movie. Celia is a writer and blogger who aims to help you cultivate an intimate relationship with the Lord by giving you the tools you need to slow down, seek still moments, and behold God’s presence with you in the everyday. She’s the author of a Bible study titled, You Are Beloved: a 21-day study on how to root your identity in the love of God, which is available now exclusively on Amazon. If you would like to connect with her, check out her blog at https://celiaamiller.com or go say hello on Instagram at @celiaamiller.

CONNECT WITH CELIA:

• Website
• Instagram
• Advent Devotional: Be Still & Know: Seeking Still Moments in God’s Presence This Advent Season (E-book)
• Article: Reflections from The Hermitage: A Guided Silent Retreat
• Article: Living Unhurried: An Invitation Into Contemplative Prayer

OTHER EPISODES + RESOURCES:

• Episode 63: Using Christian Spiritual Practices to Draw Closer to God with Blogger and Writer Celia Miller
• Episode 91: When God is Silent: Experiencing His Presence in New Ways
• Episode 92: Practicing the Holy Hush Instead of the Holiday Hustle: Intentionally Inviting Moments of Deep Silence
• Advent Resource: When Your Silent Night Feels Empty

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30)

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

Renee Leonard Kennedy wrote a book called After the Flowers Die: Encouragement for Walking Through Life After Loss.

Through her writing, she shares with both honesty and some humor about various aspects of grief that she has experienced through the loss of loved ones.

Renee and I talk about the difference between coping with grief and processing it, we talk about what it might look like to postpone grief and how to find the time to actually grieve our loss. And we also talk about what Bible reading and prayer might look like for someone who is in that place of hurt and mourning.

And there’s one more idea she talked about that I really want to emphasize before we get started, and that is that there is a time to process grief on your own with God and there’s a time to start sharing it with others. I truly feel we need both.

So as you sense God leading you to share with others, to tell your story, trust Him, too, to lead you to the right person to share with, whether that’s your spouse, a best friend, a counselor, or spiritual director. God will help you find that safe and sacred space to be heard and to have another bear witness to your story.

Okay, without further ado, here is my conversation with Renee Leonard Kennedy.

Kari

MEET RENEE:

Renee Leonard Kennedy’s non-fiction debut, After the Flowers Die: Encouragement for Walking Through Life After Loss, is a loving and practical guide through the turbulence of grief and legacy. Renee has made it her lifework to strengthen the bonds of community through shared stories, empathetic understanding, and a healthy dose of humor. Renee lives on a farm in North Carolina, where she draws inspiration from her brood of blended, birthed, and adopted children, and her faith in God.

CONNECT WITH RENEE:

• Website
• Twitter

OTHER EPISODES:

• Episodes 9 and 10: Supporting a Friend Through Grief (And Walking Through It Yourself) with Karen Altizer
• Episode 50: Gritty Faith in the Midst of Grief with Prayer Artist Jessy Paulson
• Episode 55: Reflection and Journaling as a Lifelong Practice with Business Strategist Elizabeth McCravy
• Episode 91: When God is Silent: Experiencing His Presence in New Ways

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30)

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

In this month’s bonus episode, we are going to explore the practice of imaginative prayer.

Imaginative prayer is allowing God to help you enter into a Bible story by visualizing it, using your five senses, imagining that you are there, watching it all unfold in front of you.

Or maybe God leads you to enter in as one of the main characters of the story. That happens, too.

Today, with Thanksgiving right around the corner, I want to go through the story of the grateful leper with you.

Because to me, it demonstrates how we all have different responses when God moves in our lives. And it raises the question of, do I take the time to thank God for what He has done? Do I even acknowledge it to myself?

Kari

BIBLE VERSES + RESOURCES:

• Luke 17:11-19 MSG
• Episode 32, Bible Study Made Simple with Eva Kubasiak

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

I’m not going to go on and on about the busyness of the season or why our culture has set up this way. You know what it’s like. You know the pressure you feel.

You also know that one of the things we miss out on when we’re caught up in the holiday hustle is that it leaves us with little room to pay attention—to what we’re doing, to the people we’re with, and to what God is doing in our lives.

Are you willing to give that up?

Imagine replacing hurry and anxiety with peace and joy.

Imagine having the space to recognize what is stirring within you instead of feeling like you have to shove it back down again because you’ve got to get on to the next thing.

Imagine actually experiencing God’s presence as you celebrate Christmas, Emmanuel, God with us.

What might that be like for you?

The truth is, you don’t have to subscribe to the idea of the holiday hustle. You can practice the holy hush, instead.

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Episode 91: When God is Silent: Experiencing His Presence in New Ways
• Holy Silence, by J. Brent Bill

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30.)

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

When we go through difficult seasons like grief or anxiety or illness, we can find ourselves asking so many questions of God:

Why did this happen?

What am I supposed to do?

You said You’re good, but this doesn’t feel good.

You said You’d give me Your peace, but I don’t feel Your peace. I feel turmoil. I feel anger.

And we ask these questions whether we are the ones who are struggling or if we’re the ones loving a friend through a difficult season. It’s hard to see those we love struggle, is it not?

Today, I wanted to explore that idea a little more. What happens when God goes silent? And how might we actually experience the very real presence of God in that silence?

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Poem: “Dark Night of the Soul,” by John of the Cross
• Article: “My Experience with John of the Cross’ Dark Night of the Soul,” by Bill Gaultiere
• “And the Holy Spirit helps us in our weakness. For example, we don’t know what God wants us to pray for. But the Holy Spirit prays for us with groaning that cannot be expressed in words.” (Romans 8:26 NLT)
• “…a time to be silent and a time to speak.” (Ecclesiastes 3:7 NIV)
• “Continue to throw everything in His direction.” (Sarah Westfall)

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30.)

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

Back in September, we went through a 4-part series about posturing our hearts to hear from God, and each heart posture started with the letter R. 

The first R was ready. We talked about getting ready to meet with God—creating a physical space to have some time alone with Him but also creating an inner space and preparing our hearts to hear from Him.

The second R was recognize. We talked about recognizing God’s voice, His presence, His invitation to you in that moment. What does God have to say to you?

The third R was receive. This was about receiving that truth, that promise, that invitation from Him. Accepting it, believing it.

And the fourth R was respond. We want to respond with obedience. Was there something God invited us to do? Did we do it? Did we demonstrate our trust or faith or surrender somehow?

But while I tried to be practical and specific, I know that sometimes, these things can be hard to understand unless you have an example to flesh it out a little bit.

I also know that one of the things you all ask about a lot is knowing if you’re hearing God’s voice or not. How do you know it’s Him? How do you know it’s not your own thoughts or even the enemy trying to trick you?

So when I experienced something recently, I knew I wanted to share it with you because it would demonstrate what I mean by some of those heart postures.

Here’s what happened…

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Episode 82: Posturing Your Heart to Hear from God, Part 1: Ready
• Episode 83: Posturing Your Heart to Hear from God, Part 2: Recognize
• Episode 84: Posturing Your Heart to Hear from God, Part 3: Receive
• Episode 85: Posturing Your Heart to Hear from God, Part 4: Respond
• Episode 24: An Example in Spiritual Discernment and Decision Making: Going "All In" With Love Does That

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God (Save $30 with seasonal code LDT30.)

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

On a recent trip, I realized there are plenty of ways to reach out to others even when you’re far away—whether you’re on vacation or with a family member who had to travel for medical treatment, or any number of reasons. Or maybe it’s a loved one who lives too far from you for you to be able to see them in person.

And today, I wanted to share some of those long-distance encouragement ideas with you.

Because I know you. And while there definitely times we need to completely unplug from others and find refreshment in the Lord, there are also times when we need to reach out and let others know we care, even when we can’t be there in person.

So what might encouragement on the go look like? Here are some ideas…

Kari

RESOURCES:

• Episode 88: Helping Others When You Have Limited Resources
• Article: 92 Ways to Encourage and Support Others
• Training: Courageous Care Masterclass: Learning how to C.A.R.E. for others

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection

I’m sure there are times when a friend of yours is going through a difficult season, and you really want to help. You feel like this is something God has called you to do and you’re eager to show her how much you care.

But then you start going through your options:

Maybe you can spend some extra time with her. But you're too busy with family and work and volunteer commitments to really offer her much of your time.

Maybe you can send her a care package. But the budget's pretty tight this month and you don't have a lot of extra to spend. Even though you want to.

Maybe you can make her a special gift instead. But your creative energy is completely depleted, even if you did have a chance to sit down and craft something.

So how do you come alongside your friend when you're short on time, money, and energy? Well, that is going to take some prayerful discernment, my friend. Let's talk through some options.

Kari

BIBLE VERSES & RESOURCES:

• “Dear brothers and sisters, I urge you in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ to join in my struggle by praying to God for me. Do this because of your love for me, given to you by the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:30 NLT)
• Episode 2: Discerning Who to Encourage
• Episode 27: The Cost of Caring for Others
• Episode 32: Using Pockets of Time in Your Schedule to Encourage Others
• Article: 92 Ways to Encourage and Support Others

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>> Free Journaling Workshop: 3 Ways to Encounter God on the Pages of Your Journal

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalingworkshop

>> Journal Gently: An 8-week program designed to help you process grief and trauma with God

http://lovedoesthat.org/journalgently

>> Written Spiritual Direction: Recognize God’s presence in your pain

http://lovedoesthat.org/spiritualdirection