Hilary and Abby are baaaaaccckkkk!!!
This episode, we wrap our heads around the 2024 election.

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I'm usually annoyed with "trigger warnings" as I think they're overused in modern times and people need to buck up and be a little less soft in general, but this episode actually warrants one. 

Today, Hilary and I talk about the tragic recent case of the woman in Massachusetts who murdered her own children, ages 5, 3, and 7 months. While we mourn this horrific event and loss of innocent life, we contemplate how it's actually not as shocking as it should be, given the lack of support and high levels of stress that many American women face in the postpartum period. This woman was clearly suffering from postpartum psychosis when she took her children's lives and attempted to take her own. It's important to not just vilify her but to look at what may have led up to this tragic event, so that similar events can be prevented in the future.

We discuss our own personal experiences of what made this time in our lives hard and what actions can be done on a personal/social level as well as the larger societal/government level to make this challenging time of life more manageable. The bottom line is that if we take care of our mamas, our babies can thrive as well.

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We're talking about Mother's Day today! Hilary just had her first ever special day with baby A, and I must say, her partner nailed it. Abby spent the day without her children and with her own Mom, which was a great way to actually relax! Abby shares the story of her worst mother's day gift ever (tip: don't give her something else that poops or she has to keep alive), and I give some tips to partners/spouses/baby daddys on how to treat the Mother in their life right on this day.

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Hilary's baby is now 3 months old and is experiencing what some may call a "sleep regression." Meanwhile, the World Cup just ended with Argentina beating France, leading Abby to share her personal struggle with unconscious biases against certain accents.

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In this week's episode, we discuss our experiences with postpartum depression and parenting while feeling depressed.  It takes some real super woman strength to dig deep and find the energy and patience needed to parent and love your child the right way when your own mental health isn't at its finest. 

True to form, we veer off topic into lighter subjects at times, talking about the woe of getting photographed next to your best looking girlfriends (Hilary ponders, "Am I a worm?"). Abby recounts when she got back on an antidepressant last year and experienced some negative side effects, including promptly losing control of her bowels in the middle of the work day (to put it nicely). 

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Abby talks about how she finally decided to start this podcast, after years of thinking about it and never acting on it, comparing it to when she got the courage to insert her first urinary catheter into a patient while in nursing school. 

Hilary is suuuppper pregnant and about to give birth, so Abby (mom of 3) provides some tips as she leads into the big day. 

1) Your pregnant vagina smell will eventually go back to normal 
2) Don't hold too tight to your birth plan--goal should be healthy and alive mama and baby! 
3) Be prepared to love your child way more than you love your baby daddy

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In this episode, we talk about the numerous challenges moms face during the first month after giving birth, such as breastfeeding difficulties and your own body's recovery. We also dive into how you make the decision on whether or not to circumcise your baby boy, a topic often fraught with high emotions! Hilary shares details of her own birth story, and Abby reveals her own personal rule about sex after giving birth.

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As Hilary enters into her 3rd trimester and her baby is measuring small, we discuss the stresses and perils of prenatal testing. 

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In our first episode, meet your hosts Abby and Hilary, who recount the history of their 20+ year friendship and what led them to want to start a podcast together. Starting as two 18 year old college freshman from Tennessee trying to find our way in Charleston, South Carolina, up to today as two 40 year old moms living across the country from each other,  we find ourselves just trying to maintain our friendships, sense of humor and sanity as we navigate work, motherhood, relationships, our changing bodies and so much more.

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