Laws of Abundance

Recipe Card (can be a visual of an actual recipe card for blog or content on website)

Preparation: Take stock of your current situation to know where you began.

1 Full cup of gratitude

2 hours of meditation

6 spoonfuls of daily practices (x2)

A hearty handful of boundaries

A sprinkling of laughter

Stir Clockwise while smiling and holding a vision of living a life you enjoy.

Repeat for no less than 10 weeks, then revisit your current state, your vision, and account for progress. Celebrate your accomplishments and continue until you allow purpose to set in.

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Making a recipe card like this might sound kind of funny for something as ephemeral as Joy or living a Joyful Life. But what if Joy wasn't something elusive? Most of us chasing Joy think of it like the wings of a butterfly. Something beautiful that you cannot touch. And like those wings, if you do touch them, they are destroyed.

What if it was something you could actually touch and not only feel its tangibility- but build beneath you like the firm foundation of a house? I'm here to tell you that you can, and the recipe is quite available to you with a little bit of commitment to the discipline of the practice of know thyself.

First to my butterfly wing analogy, the reason many people think Joy and enjoyment are elusive, and that experiencing joy (like touching butterfly wings) destroys it, is because most people are chasing Happiness. Happiness is an external fleeting thing that depends on factors outside ourselves. And the other side of the Happiness coin is sadness. Take, for example, you place all your expectations for happiness on a relationship with a significant other. And you are in that relationship and everything is all perfect in your life because someone loves you and accepts you and wants to do things with you. This is Happiness you say. Then one day that person says I'm leaving, or that person dies, or that person changes because of some factor outside of your control and the relationship ends.

Now you are sad. You are sadder than you ever were before the relationship because for awhile you had The Thing you thought made you happy. And in a way you are right. You touched the butterfly's wings and it couldn't fly anymore, and it died. Now you have no more feeling of Happy - you have the memory of it, the longing for it. But you no longer have it so that

attachment to this past state of Happy you lost now makes you Sad because it is draining your today (like a leak in a boat).

I watch this play out with my partner every time he speaks of his past fiance who left him because he stopped fulfilling her narcissist needs. He has this attachment to that belief in that with her, when he was in the peak of his health, in the peak of this happiness having all these activities with this other built purely on external circumstances that He was Happy. And maybe he was Happy. For a moment, because he bought her the right ring, he took her to dance in the right place, he provided everything she needed so that she could get on her feet, save for a house, make a down payment and leave him when she didn't need him anymore. And then his Happy came crashing down, when the lie was revealed and she left him because his usefulness to her ended - putting him in a pit of depression that caused him to harm himself with alcohol and other choices due to the severe sadness felt after the high of Happy.

Now today, he isn't in that depression anymore, we are in a healthy relationship of exchange co-creating together, but I can still see that attachment to a past version of himself when he believes he was Happy. Because in that past he had health (and no liver disease) and he had for this brief moment some combination of external factors (fleeting as they were) that made everything "Perfect." So now, this attachment to a past version of himself when he was quote/unquote Happy inhibits his ability to fully experience his present moment and the amazing life he and I are creating. He is working on it, and acknowledges his attachment challenges, and having physical limitations is a real obstacle,- which is why finding our inner source of Joy (and thus resilience) is so essential.

Ok, let's talk about Joy again and how it is different from Happiness. Joy is not ephemeral and intangible. Further, Joy is not Happiness. Happiness is external and its opposite is Sadness. So the happier you are, when the source of that happiness leaves you the sadder you get. It is cause and effect and the hermetic principle of rhythm. One extreme always swings back to the other like a teeter totter or those sets of silver balls that click on your desk.

Joy is built in your life from within and is not dependent on external factors.

My recipe card is not facetious. It is true. Just like laying a foundation and building something - you go through a specific set of actions consistently with commitment to yourself for the sake of yourself, and you can build a joyful life and create a tangible indestructible foundation of joy in your life such that when something awful happens you have the resilience and fortitude and unshakable joy in your life that you will recover and likely thrive in spite of the awful thing versus being thrown in a pit of despair and sadness.

So let's walk through this recipe.

1. Gratitude - One Full cup of gratitude. "Thank you for everything you have given me, everything taken away, and everything I have left."

Gratitude is cultivated by practice but it bears the best possible fruit. Scientific studies show that it rewires your brain creating new neural pathways such that it shifts your perspective. Story after story shows people not only surviving awful situations but thriving through them because they have gratitude.

So you MUST have a gratitude practice to create a joyful life.

1. Meditation - clearing the mind and connecting to source. We must clear away monkey mind so that we can know who we are and what we actually want free from the trappings of all the shoulds and programming of the collective consciousness.

Meditation is a learned practice as well, and there are so many methods - active, passive, moving, silent - they ALL HELP. Every single one of them. The key is you must do it. Study after study shows meditation as a game changer in anyone's life who applies themself to it. Same as gratitude it creates new pathways in the brain that allow stillness and new ways of perceiving and being which all equal new thought patterns and ways to access our joy.

The recommended daily allotment of Meditation is two hours a day. But commitment to a meditation practice, even if a few minutes a day is an essential element to a Joyful life.

1. 6 Daily Practices - I call these Rituals that help you learn how to manage your own personal will and power. Your will to not be pushed and pulled by the forces external to you for good or ill.

In my practice as a Guide in the Lineage of King Salomon with the Modern Mystery School International we teach Spirituality as a science. When you take the Empower Thyself Class & choose the path of Initiation we give you six daily practices to complete every morning and evening that combined with meditation will provide you the means to strengthen your will and thus understand how you are choosing or not choosing (i.e. exercising your will) in this life and how that is adding up to the fruits of what you see around you.

For me the six daily simple practices gave me the means to understand how much of other people's stuff I was taking on as my own. I learned by doing the daily practices that I didn't need to take on these things as my own. So I was able to energetically learn how to hold my boundaries without guilt or shame so I was able to let go of so much that was not serving me and start to consciously choose things that bring in more enjoyment to my life. It empowered me to no longer be a victim of my subconscious (i.e. to get out of my own way).

1. Boundaries - which brought me a hearty helping of boundaries. Initially, like everything else I'm talking about here had to be practiced until they became real and more natural for me to set.

Boundaries take will. They take the desire to set them. They take an acknowledgement and a discernment that we do not have to engage with the drama others put in front of us on giant platters. Boundaries take an acknowledgement that even though we can do it, it doesn't mean we should.

Boundaries are not walls that block everyone out. But they are an acknowledgment that you do not have to take on the thoughts or ideas of others or do everything that they want you to do.

One can start by putting boundaries on your time. Time blocking for meditation, for exercise, for fun time, for family time. These are something you can fake until you make them because practicing will give you the results to realize you can. And the first time you set a boundary it will feel weird and uncomfortable, but it will result in something freeing, releasing you of the other things pulling on your energy.

1. Laughter is a practice that brings lightness to your life. It truly is the best medicine. So find ways to laugh at the world, ourselves, together and with others.

Laughter has always been a natural instinct of mine and I've been lucky enough to surround myself with those who have phenomenal senses of humor. But also my teachers I have chosen Know laughter is an essential practice for a joyful life. So they purposefully add it as a tool to their teaching style because of the light it generates from within a human being.

So, actively seek laughter. And practice laughter. Especially if times are tough.

1. Clockwise to stir it all together.

Clockwise is the energy of building. So I say always work your magick by stirring in a clockwise direction. This makes for great recipes in the kitchen as well! Blend all of these practices together holding a vision for what you want to have more of, or what you want to experience.

1. Visual to pick a direction. If you do not know where you are going you are never going to get there. If you are always running away you are never going toward anything. And you have to pick and visualize a destination to get there.

So, an essential element of having a joyful life is visualizing some aspects of what that enjoyable life looks like. So you can actually start moving towards creating that. What are some things/aspects/characteristics of that life that you can start taking action toward by using all the other tools I just discussed?

And eventually after practicing all of the above in sets of 10 weeks or 3 months you are going to find yourself feeling not only joyful but purposeful.

Last but not least in my recipe I note to Prepare by taking stock of your current state. This will allow you to know your progress when you make it. Which you will.

For the six daily rituals and practices that help you build your will and to Know Thyself as the divine powerful being that you are you can access these by receiving the life activation and participating in the Empower Thyself Class & Initiation. If you are local to me visit my website calendar on angellatterell.com to see my next offering or call or email me to set up an appointment to chat about them further. If you are not local to me, do the same and I will connect you to a guide in your area who can work with you.

Meanwhile, anyone can practice gratitude with paper and pen and start a meditation practice. I have tools for both including a workbook and frequent Wednesday evening meditations online that are completely free.

If you want help with anything - I can help with that! Reach out anytime and let's get you moving forward to create your recipe for a joyful life!

"Critical thinking is the ability to analyze, evaluate, and reason through information logically. It's about questioning your and others' assumptions, recognizing biases, and seeking evidence before forming conclusions.

Wisdom, on the other hand, transcends simple logic. It calls upon the spirit, not just the mind. It seeks the Light — the knowing of a matter. It discerns the unseen and weighs the good of every situation beyond mere logic.

Truth is only ever found in immutable reality, but what often serves us better is understanding — a deeper grasp that wisdom provides, aligning with the eternal rather than chasing fleeting facts." – Sovereign Ipsissimus Dave Lanyon

In the past year, I had a hip replacement, got engaged, moved into a new home with my fiancé, and walked with him through the ups and downs of his liver disease. I continued running a law practice, took the Florida Bar exam — twice — and wrote two books. At the same time, I continued my mission as a Guide in the Lineage of King Salomon, initiating those ready to walk the path of progression.

People say if you want something done, ask a busy person. I might just be that person. But for the first time in my life, I also had to let some things go. I quit some commitments. I stopped doing things that no longer aligned with the quality I expect of myself or the service I offer others. Because when everything piles on, even the strong have to reevaluate.

So this year, I chose to attend only the required Professional Integration Days (PIDs) with the Modern Mystery School International, — not to pursue more training, but to honor my current bandwidth. I came in feeling a mix of pragmatism (yay, boundaries!) and a little FOMO over not diving deeper into the higher-level teachings.

But from day one, something was different. This wasn't just another "recert." It was real Light, real Teaching — the kind that delivers weeks' worth of transformation in just a few days. And one of the biggest insights that landed for me?

On the surface, it seems simple: take action, get results. That's Hermetic Principle #6 — Cause and Effect. Action leads to reaction, which leads to outcomes. Kabbalistically: Idea → Thought → Plan → Action = Result. Magickally: you place the ingredients in a container, add the right energy, and something new is born.

But here's the nuance: you can accomplish a lot through sheer will. But at the end of the day,do you have anything meaningful to show for it? Have you gained wisdom, or just collected gold stars?

If I had focused only on being a good lawyer, I'd probably be a partner in a firm by now,and miserable. I'd have achievements and accolades, sure. But a hollow life. Thankfully, something deeper stirred in me,a knowing that just being "successful" by society's standards wasn't enough.

I wanted more. I needed joy. Fulfillment. Purpose. And when I didn't have those things, I numbed the ache with food, alcohol, and distraction. Some people thought I should be grateful and settle. But I couldn't. The mundane was never my calling.

We don't come into this world with an owner's manual that tells us our purpose on page 42. We fumble, experiment, search. And if we're fortunate, we encounter someone with a key,someone who helps us fumble more efficiently, and begin to uncover our own answers.

From a young age, I knew there was something greater. As a little girl talking to Jesus in my heart, I felt it. That drive led me to Catholic confirmation, then to studying Buddhism, and later to a degree in Philosophy. All gave me glimpses, but never the full picture.

What stuck with me from that academic journey was my advisor, Mr. West, who told me:

"These people,CEOs, world leader,they have degrees in philosophy. Logic and reasoning can take you anywhere. The others are just hoping someone will tell them what to do."

And he was right. That skillset carried me through law school and beyond. But critical thinking alone doesn't lead to fulfillment. For that, we need wisdom. And true wisdom doesn't live in textbooks.

I had no idea why I went. I had no plan to be an energy healer,I was a lawyer, a senior project manager. Where was that going to fit in? But something called me. And when I came home and gave my first Life Activation, everything changed.

It changed her life. And that changed mine.

In that moment, I discovered something far beyond the mundane: I had the power to help someone heal. To step into more joy and wholeness. And for the first time, I felt real fulfillment. The kind that isn't logical, but undeniable. The kind that propels you forward through every obstacle.

My partner at the time left. My home no longer felt like home. My job felt empty. The distractions lost their pull. So I did what felt right, I kept serving. I did mystic fairs. I gave rune readings. I coached. I opened my own business. I started teaching. And though my calendar was packed, my heart was full.

Service became my soul fuel.

I chose the Ritual Master path. Learned new modalities. Served more people. And when I saw the power of initiation changing lives, I knew: I couldn't keep it to myself. I had to become a Guide.

With each step, I became a bigger version of myself. Not because I wanted to be "bigger" — but because I had to grow to hold the energy of the work. To live the magick. To be the living embodiment of the teachings. Not as a performance,but as a demonstration. A beacon.

Grateful. Fulfilled. Wise.Not because I know everything, but because I've been willing to act, fall down, reflect, realign, and keep going.

I've learned that fulfillment lives on the other side of service. That wisdom is forged through aligned action. That getting things done isn't just about doing,it's about doing the right things, in the right order, for the right reasons.

This isn't just productivity. This is purpose-driven, soul-aligned action.

And that is how we become wise.

Need help refueling your actions with the right flame? I can help with that. Reach out to me and lets align your path with your purpose!

Our current circumstances are the result of the fruits of our choices.

Yes, the news may say this about the President and his administration doing that, and everyone has opinions. But what are you doing with your life?

Are you making choices to better yourself? A student called me the other day, upset and angry at the world, spouting, "There needs to be more light!" And I said, "Then you need to become THAT light."

I told them that being angry and negative is just adding more anger and negativity to the world.

They heard me and applied for the Ritual Master path in the Modern Mystery School. They then chose to work on themselves to bring more light and higher vibrations to this world. We need more light, but it can only start with first bringing this light to the darkness of our hearts and daily lives.

Are you making choices for yourself to better yourself? Turn off the TV and the radio, get off social media, and sit with YOU for a second. What do you want? What brings you joy? What unburdens your heart? Do you want to make your home, neighborhood, and family more peaceful? Do you want to be less stressed out? Do you want more abundance? Do you want purpose? Or do you want to enjoy tea in the morning while listening to the birds without racing your mind? Do you want to find your proper, indestructible, happy place?

We all have a choice. Even if it is a situation in your life where you feel the odds are against you and all directions appear to be rivers of poo. YOU still have a choice. The Choice can be to continue and sit in misery or we can choose how to face adversity. And we can also decide how we face the possibility of JOY within our actions.

I once lived a life where I constantly chose to limit my joy. Because of my belief system, it had to be hard to produce results (as in non-enjoyable). Now, hard work is important, but not at the expense of your health and family and living a joyful life. We also cannot sit back and wait for things to knock on our door and for others to create happiness and abundance for us. We must take personal responsibility and action toward our goals.

But that doesn't mean choosing the path with the most painful obstacles or the path you have deemed "responsible" is the best.

I once chose a seemingly "responsible" path to become an attorney. I didn't choose this path because I was excited about the work. I chose it because it was good, honest work that I knew could be well paid for, and I had the necessary skills. I knew I would be good at it if I could achieve it. So, in a way, I didn't choose to be a lawyer - I chose a path of achievement. Thus, when I completed my law license in Minnesota at 23, I looked around and said, "Is this all there is?".

I didn't like being a lawyer.

But it was a hard-to-achieve and honorable profession, so I dove in head first, working myself to almost a full head of grey hair and chronic fatigue by age 27. I was well paid in a successful profession and ultimately miserable, but to the world, I was "successful." Inside, I was full of anxiety and despair. I began drinking every single day to manage the deep-seated anxiety and dissatisfaction from the weight of other people's problems.

So, I chose to run away from it. I left Minnesota and ran to Seattle, Washington. I thought life on the West Coast would be different, that lawyers there would be different, that everything would be different. But wherever you go, THERE YOU ARE. I was still me, and instead of choosing my joy, I kept choosing the path of what the world told me success looked like. I needed a change and began searching for a new career.

It wasn't surprising when I found myself taking the job as a project manager. Yes, it was a new career, but it was still wholly based on achievement, and I was ready to put on my work boots and fully (get things done) again! And I was good at it. I got the same sense of accomplishment and superficial pride because I was doing lots of work - but it was other people's work. Not my work. I was drinking less, but still too much. I was at least meditating with my Buddhist practice regularly. I achieved a state of OK, of just getting by, of occupying myself with the mundane. But I was still choosing to suppress my joy because I was ignoring my motivations for living.

I was on the path of what I SHOULD do out of fear and scarcity and programming - and honestly, a complete unwillingness to face my negative ego that kept me a codependent functional alcoholic pretending that this is what life should be.

Then, I found something that opened my eyes so wide that I couldn't continue to ignore my power to choose joy. I found access to my source of power, my will, my courage, my higher self. I found the ability to articulate what I enjoyed and what I wanted to create for myself. It was there all along, but I had buried it deep and ignored it for so long that the sound of my desire, intuition, and clarity was foreign, hidden, and masked to myself. My negative ego was louder - the voice said, "That's stupid. That's a waste of time. That is mumbo jumbo superstitious nonsense." But then the voices began to fade once I took the risk and CHOSE to try the tools offered to me on the Path of Initiation within the Lineage of King Salomon as taught to me by my guide in the Modern Mystery School International.

I am so fortunate to have had a good friend who chose to keep inviting me to try this path for years. Five-plus years, to be exact. First, we were roommates, and then we were neighbors. She kept inviting me to do these weird things, and this class was called Empower Thyself. And I thought, "It costs money, and it's two days, and it's silly spiritual bullshit that isn't going to help me with anything." But actually, it was exactly what I needed to do to break out of my programming. What is the definition of insanity? To keep doing the same thing the same way and to expect different results. That is what I was doing, making me tired and miserable.

I am grateful to my friend who chose to stick with me and keep inviting me to this path because it took me a while to choose it. But when I took the leap and received a life activation and attended Empower Thyself, I learned daily practices that could help me see clearer, dampen all the shoulds, and hear my true self when I said, "I want and desire to take this action, for the sake of my joy." I received an initiation that increased my willpower, so I had more strength to start making healthy choices like meditation over happy hour and complaint sessions with friends and colleagues. Choices like yoga and working out to move my energy rather than eating a crescent to push it deep down within. I started making choices like travel and taking trips to write about my experiences and the food I encountered for the pure joy of it. I spent my money on myself instead of my codependent relationships (and trying to make other people happy).

And I started making more money. I saw a way to use my skills as an attorney to help people the way I enjoyed. I started introducing people to the tools of the mystery school lineage and offering Life Activations, which positively impacted me and those who chose to receive the energy healing modality I learned to perform. My life started to take on meaning. I was no longer getting by and surviving.

I gained resilience, and my cup overflowed with joy—so much joy that I could share it with others.

Choice.

We all have a choice. Free will is the fundamental principle of our existence as humans. We choose our reaction to the world. We choose our actions. We decide how we spend our time and energy creating and who we are around to experience that creation with.

I acknowledge that we can find ourselves sometimes in challenging situations. Still, with some exceptions (of people enslaved and/or human trafficked or actual victims of violent crime) in every situation, we have a choice. However, most of us today believe we are victims of our circumstances rather than take personal responsibility for them.

If you don't even know where to start, I can help with that! Reach out, and let's clear the muck and activate your life, then onto the path of progression to figure it out for yourself. It is a choice for you to love yourself and make your world, starting with YOU—only better.

"Your reason and your passion are the rudder and the sails of your seafaring soul. If either your sails or your rudder be broken, you can but toss and drift, or else be held at a standstill in mid-seas. "

For reason, ruling alone, is a force confing, and passion, unattended, is a flame that burns to its own destruction.

Therefore let your soul exalt your reason to the height of passion, that it may sing;and let it direct your passion with reason, that your passion may live through its own daily resurrection, and like the phoenix rise above its own ashes."

- Kahlil Gibran

The Universe was like, "Nope - you don't get what you want." And I was like, "What the fuck?!"

Last year at this time, I hit a shocking and painful wall in my life. I had leaned in hard to my spiritual training to reach a certification that I truly desired, and had spent a massive amount of time, energy and money in the process of trying to complete.. I was attempting to put down roots in Florida, but still standing in Seattle, and traveling frequently to Michigan and Toronto.

The year before, December of 2022 I had officially moved to St. Augustine, Florida,I I had found a nice guy I liked spending time with. And, over most of 2023, this "nice guy" and I moved towards becoming serious, By Fall, we agreed to be with each other in a committed monogamous relationship. I, however, was still deep in the throes of my training, which meant spending much of my time flying between Seattle and Toronto.. . Unfortunately, despite the grueling hours, long nights and money spent, I failed my final exam and did not receive my certification. As I returned to Florida, there was not a part of me that was not exhausted. I was processing failure and grieving what I thought was meant to be mine. - I was ready to step back and redirect my attention. I was finally ready to settle deep into my beautiful beachside hometown in Florida, and pivot my desires into the arms of this relationship that had been placed on the backburner for too long. Or so I thought -It wasn't long after, I found out my nice guy was also seeing someone else and wasn't so nice after all. The days after, I went into shock.. All I wanted to do was go home. and cozy up to my boyfriend. And the Universe responded with an abrupt and harsh NO. - Again, what the fuck?!

Not to mention, this wasn't the first time I had been cheated on. "How could this happen to me again? This pattern? This betrayal? What is wrong with me?" I began to think…but then I chose something different. I resisted the temptation of fully drowning myself in self pity and victimhood, - Instead I called in help. I reached out to some very wise and trustworthy friends, and asked for a reality check.

One of those friends told me about a story of a woman who had died recently of something entirely preventable. The woman had been so focused on other people: pleasing them, helping them, doing for them, busying herself with all of their needs first, - she did not take care of herself. She ignored her basic needs and neglected her body as it began to tell her something was wrong.. AND IT KILLED HER. . . The preacher at her funeral said words that chilled me deep into my bones. "Get YOUR house in order. This woman is dead because of something entirely preventable. She was taking care of all of you, but forgot to first take care of herself. She chose to not first get her house in order before providing assistance to others, and paid the ultimate price. Yes, we should seek to help others, but we cannot pour from an empty cup."

They were words my very weary mind, body and soul needed to hear. My house was not even close to being in order and I was exhausted from all the travel and fruitless endeavors. My car had been stolen, my arthritis was angry, my house had ants, my dog missed me, my boyfriend left me, and my businesses was suffering. I had failed to ground myself into this budding new home,because I was so busy running all over the country pursuing something that actually wasn't my dream. I began to really ask myself, "What is it that I actually want?" And the answers came. I I wanted a nice cozy, simple life with a man who enjoyed spending time with me. I wanted to be healthy and available to be of service to others with my light work and my law practice. I wanted to be figuring out my joy and passions again. I wanted to bask in the sunlight and sit on a beach. Was I doing any of this? Nope. And I was in deep despair and grieving so many things. My house was not in order.

I made a vow to myself and placed these newfound prayers and intentions into my daily meditation.. I finally admitted a truth I had been hiding and distracting myself from - I wanted a partner. I wanted a home. I wanted to find my husband. My person. My mate. Someone who I could truly co-create with and share my life with., I was going to have to prioritize cultivating a sense of home. No more standing on the fence between two or three vastly different area codes. I began the application process for the Florida bar exam and I started dating again with the intention of finding my husband. I declared my boundaries and got clear on what I wanted and didn't want. And everyday I worked towards clarifying these desires, boundaries and intentions.

I took a hard, honest look at my life and the choices I was making that kept leading to the same patterns and outcomes.

1. I realized I was chasing goals, certifications, and achievements that lacked real meaning or passion for me. I was stuck in "achievement mode" — going through the motions for the sake of accomplishment alone, not fulfillment.

2. In my relationships, I was settling. I had set myself up for disappointment by choosing partners who reflected the same unhealthy patterns back to me. These patterns weren't just happening to me — I was actively choosing them.

First, I desire a true life partnership — a husband with whom I can build a meaningful, fulfilling life — and I will settle for nothing less.

Second, achievement for achievement's sake is no longer my priority. My goal is to serve humanity while also living a life that brings me joy and balance. This means putting down roots in Florida, traveling less for work and more for pleasure, and focusing on work that lights me up — empowering others through teaching, lightwork, and authorship, rather than leaning heavily on consulting or lawyering.

Fast forward to the present day. It is December 2024 and we are on the dawn of the New Year - just in time to set new intentions, I spent the past weekend in a class called Self-Leadership. The class was focused on how, through awareness of ourselves and our emotions - we can learn how to start detaching from the obstacles that we create. How we can start being more integrous with ourselves and take the actions we want, toward healthy productive desires that progress us to a better version of ourselves, and accomplishing what we want in life. How to stop the victim mindset and self pity, and as a result of being able to detach from the "story" or the "negative emotion" or the perceived "thing that is stopping me," we find freedom.

As I was listening to the content over the two days I had an epiphany about just how sneaky our negative ego truly is. The content was all things I had heard before. In fact, I had heard it in several different places, Hermetic classes, other seminars (albeit not with the spiritual lens). But it wasn't until this moment that it finally fully integrated into my body and I was really able to feel and understand it's profound truth. This revelation came one year after declaring to myself and the Universe that it was my time to put my house in order. .

And in this gorgeous present day moment,I take a long and very comforting sip of tea as I ponder on the teachings of the leadership course. I curl up on the couch inside my beautiful 2700 sq. ft home in St. Augustine, Florida. My partner, my soul mate, and a man I could someday call my husband sits down on the couch with me and places his arm around me. This is not just my house, but our house. Over the past year, we have built a home together. We begin to discuss the trickiness of the negative ego and relish in our shared desire for self improvement.

I tell him about how I have recently been struggling with time management and realizing the roles the negative ego is playing in this. "My time has become messy for two reasons. 1. My own lack of boundaries. And 2. My own attitude and belief about a lack of time," I say as he listens intently.

He agrees, and adds "It is the sneaky negative ego that says time is not there. It's the sneaky negative ego that says you don't have enough, or that you are not good enough."

I recognize that same negative ego that had me running myself ragged for other people's goals a year ago, has me doing it again just under a different disguise with work. We are our biggest obstacle. Always.

My body lights up as I absolutely adore having a partner to share my life and epiphanies with. This was just a dream one year ago. But it was a dream that was my (and no one else's) true heart's desire and the Universe generously and abundantly gave to me.

Today, I am filled with joy and gratitude as I don't just have a house, but a home. No more chasing three different cities or dead-end relationships. I sit in the center of love and comfort, surrounded by my parents, friends, and this amazing life partner, who I adore and who adores me. A man for the first time in my life, I fully trust.

I reflect on my original intention - Is my home in order? In many ways yes. It has been an incredible year and I have come so far, but there are things that I would like to improve upon. As I look ahead, I realize I now want to deepen this understanding and continue my work in getting my home in order. The concept is still new and I am always a work in progress.

We are our biggest roadblock to all of the things - taking care of our needs and our wants. Living in joy is a process that requires awareness, discernment, commitment and consistency and spot checking, and reference points to see where we are and where we are going. And sometimes, recalibrating our internal GPS, when it gets off track.

On the dawn of this New Year, I am recalibrating and giving myself the gift of direction, acknowledgment of my passions and setting new boundaries with reason and light.

As you look upon your own New Year intentions, don't be afraid to revisit old goals through new eyes. There is a time for everything and maybe you failed in the past because you were not ready or maybe you failed in the past because the desire was not yours. The only thing that is constant in life is change and you may be surprised how an older and wiser version of you may bring a new perspective to an old intention.

And be careful of that tricky negative ego! Remember, if you need some help along the way - whether legally or spiritually - I can help with that! Contact me at LatterellLaw.com and lets get you set on the highest path forward for 2025!

I personally love Thanksgiving - if you've ever read my blog, Paprika Angel you will see my love of food and travel but also the time and energy I have spent preparing this meal for friends and loved ones and sometimes strangers for years. With minor exception I pull together 10 or more people to feast extravagantly every year, even if my funds are short. I always have found a way because I love to prepare and feed and make offerings at this time of year from a place of love.

At one of my in person legal educational events last year, my door prize included a Turkey Day kit and the who won it said. "Oh, I don't celebrate Thanksgiving." and was offended by my gift. I stopped in my tracks, not to apologize, but for my naivety and surprise - as some still believe and or are wholly ignorant of what Thanksgiving as a National Holiday is about. So we are going to go down a little gobbler day history less here to reclaim any misconceptions of Thanksgiving back into the light.

There were no docile aboriginals showing up at some saintly puritan pilgrims' feet offering them maize and turkeys. Our mythological buckled hat pilgrims straight off the Mayflower likely did not sit down at any table anywhere, let alone with the natives of the region we now call New England.

There is however a 1st hand account in a letter form from around that time of the first English settlements of Prospectors (not religious pilgrims but gold hunters seeking riches in the new lands) that a "harvest festival" of sorts occurred over the course of weeks involving the hunting of wild game (deer, wild turkeys, bear) and the sharing of cranberries, gourds and tubers by the local native friendlies. Likely, the "settlers" were starving to death on their own with no knowledge of what was edible in the inhospitable places they chose to set up camp, and having no supplies from England left over, the aboriginals may have felt sorry for some of them and shown them what to do. Or for the sake of trading for weapons to gain strength over another nation, they brought the prospectors food.

The original table is a myth taught to school children. Just as the belief that the original settlors came in the name of religious freedom and that Columbus discovered America. The actual first settlements in what is now the United States America were all about gold and riches. The actual first settlement in the United States in St. Augustine - and that was under the guise of saving souls by the Catholic church but it really was about the protection of Spanish gold from South America. But if there was truly to be a first North American Thanksgiving it would be the priests and Spanish military landing at what is now called St. Augustine and meeting The Timucuans, a truly kind and docile native people of Northeastern Florida, who took immediately to the prayers and symbols of the Catholic priests, and all of them celebrated together the mass and feast of St. Mary at El Nombre Dias (there is still in a cross in the ground today where this happened). They all prayed together, Timucuan, Spanish sailors and soldiers, Catholic priests - and they offered thanks and praise to god and the great mother, and they shared in a feast of shellfish provided to them by the friendly natives. But as England and Spain were rivals in the prospecting of North America for gold and riches, this story of a true first Thanksgiving (coming together in gratitude and prayer to the universal force that loves and protects us) is not in the common mythology of the United States. In fact it is buried in the annuls of Florida history as Florida did not become a state released from Spain until just before the US Civil War.

So, let's move forward in time a bit to when we have a thriving New England after the Revolutionary war when we are an independent nation open to those seeking freedom of religion, opportunity to farm, and asylum from persecution. It was during these times that we have huge influxes of Puritans who had Thanksgiving as a time of prayer. Entire days devoted only to giving thanks to God for everything in creation. For a long time this day of prayer and observance was the equivalent of our modern day Christmas celebrations because in puritanical christian practice the giving of gifts and worshiping saints like the Catholics and Lutherans was looked down upon. Puritans were very austere and labeled any festivals as negative, wasteful, and involving satanic invitations. So instead they prayed and gave thanks and this holy time generally occurred around the beginning of November - the early parts of winter and the late stages of Autumn when it was important to count your blessings and prepare for the meager months ahead by working hard to fill your stores. Pigs and Poultry would be slaughtered and salted and prepped for winter storage. So there would be a time of feasting as things that couldn't be stored had to be used up to prevent waste. It was out of necessity and practicality in a pre-electricity society.

People today can barely imagine going without the internet for a couple of hours let alone not having running water and electricity. Something we take for granted with the evolution of humanity and technology, is how fragile we are without the technology tools we have built.

This time of year it was necessary to feast so we did not waste. The last hurrah before the lean times when people died of exposure and diseases of malnutrition and lack of sanitation. But they still paused to give thanks and pray and embody gratitude. In Viking society even before our young country of the United States this concept of gratitude, prayer and nourishment was built into the bedrock of the culture (as Vikings were farmers and life was not easy). You see it in the Rune stones - Fehu translates to cattle which is the rune of abundance and mobile property. Wunjo translates to winning and joy - and it is the rune of gratitude i.e. having/having enough. And finally Algiz which translates to Elk Sedge or stage is a run of protection, boundaries and prayer because the man who prays and acknowledges what he has is protected by the Gods.

Alright, back to the US and our Thanksgiving story. I'm writing this on the eve of the 2024 U.S. Presidential election so I think it is poignant in this time of massive emotional divisiveness to explain when and how Thanksgiving, the National holiday of gratitude, unity, and celebration of shared blessings came to be.

Civil War.

Can you even imagine if war was outside your backdoor? Cities burning, young men across the entire country dead and maimed by the millions. Families lost their homes, their means of making any income, there was no usable farmland, just fields of blood. People are starving and grieving.

Any issue we are facing today, pales in comparison to the aftermath of the United States civil war. And it was then that the Federal Government and Abraham Lincoln declared the need for a Great Healing. A coming together to give thanks for what we had been given by God and together as families and a hurting nation.

Gratitude is the foundation upon which the United States was rebuilt upon.

Gratitude is the strong foundation that allows us to build in spite of the greatest atrocities and destruction.. This is what saved Holocaust survivors. And Thanksgiving as a holiday is the core of our nation's gratitude practice and abundance mindset. It was initiated as a National holiday to create healing and to mend the divide between neighbors, so we could all come together as Americans again. Not as Northerners nor Southerns, not based in color or creed, or economies, not separated by ideologies , but together, as Americans - united in the spirit of acknowledging blessings and breaking bread.

Every thought is acted upon. By you or someone else. This is a Hermetic principle and a truth of the universe. How many people today have said death to Trump! Or Kill Kamala! Or some version of hate directed at those who hold differing views? Where are we going with this? Hate begets Hate and is acted upon. We can see this in our Nations history. I bring this up not because I hold any political viewpoint but because I am on the side of humanity, love, unity and reason for us to come together. Let us come together to solve our challenges. Let us come together and hear differing perspectives. Let us find nourishing common ground and stop playing the blame game.

How do we come together? With the greatest healers of all time - prayer and gratitude. Gratitude and prayer. Whatever that looks like to you. Whatever God, Gods or forces of universality you choose to worship. Look at your fellow person, your family friends, neighbors, city dwellers, statesman, countrymen and country women. And give gratitude for this country of opportunity of freedom and abundance we live in.

War is not at our back door. Our daughters can go to school. We have running water and electricity and almost everyone can have a cell phone and access to the Internet. YES there are problems but we have the technology, the infrastructure, and the resources to fix them! There is no lack. Lack is a fiction built by ideologies that come from hurt,shadow and negative ego. As within so without. If we are victims internally, we are victims externally. If we choose abundance and healing internally we will create healing and abundance for ourselves and others externally.

So. this is why Thanksgiving is such a special day and such an opportunity for us all. It is a day in our collective consciousness dedicated to the GREAT HEALING energy of gratitude. The power of gratitude is phenomenal. An action of gratitude has a rippling effect on the collective. . Like thoughts attract like thoughts. By us all coming together in gratitude we can create an enormous healing force of magnifying love. We can collectively create a shift in the consciousness to healing—and not just others but ourselves!.

Overcome the divide created by elections and propaganda language that is made to trigger our most egocentric emotions. We can be better than the propaganda counsels. We can unite in love. We can give thanks together in the bounty we have. We can propel humanity forward by choosing to raise everyone up. We can forgive the past hurts and grow as a result. We can truly be a land of opportunity. We just have to acknowledge in rich and beautiful gratitude everything we already have, and everything gratitude will allow us to create together.

In the true spirit of this misunderstood holiday, I wish you all— including those with differing politics, ideologies, geographies and beliefs— Happy Thanksgiving!

Forgiveness - the big F word. It sounds so simple but is the most difficult. Why is it so important to forgive? And how do we actually forgive?

To forgive is to release the hold a hurt or injury has on your physical and metaphysical self. The release cuts the cord to the negative energy that is binding you to an old self and way of being. If you can let go of the attachment to the pain and lower frequency emotion, you will allow space in your heart to heal. And by healing from the heart you increase your capacity to love yourself and others. You raise your frequency to a higher vibrational state and attract more positive things and people to yourself. This is why forgiveness isn't for the person you forgive. It is FOR YOU.

Forgiving ourselves and others is absolutely necessary for us to be able to grow, shift and evolve. And evolution/evolving is essential to living your highest life. If we trap ourselves in a box and refuse to change and grow, we lose access to so much abundance. . Our energy is instead occupied and used to hold on to the past. And then we get physically or mentally sick. We become sick and tired and then we get angry because we are sick and tired of being sick and tired and then we start to blame everything outside ourselves for the illness taking over our lives. When the perpetrator of all of it is the person in the mirror.

Our refusal to evolve. Our fear of change. Our attachments to the status quo. Our inability to forgive ourselves for our mistakes are all chains. If we choose forgiveness we can liberate ourselves. . Flush it down the proverbial toilet and free up all that energy to actually live our life. And living life is worth more than the need to hold on to the hurt.

But how? That is the big question.

As this is not an act we can think ourselves into. Overthinking exacerbates the challenge, it roots the pattern of regret and resentment, anger or feeling wronged, and triggering thoughts that "something is wrong with me,I'm broken, and unlovable" Thoughts create our reality. As within so without. So an intercessor of sorts is needed - our will, our heart that is connected to source - and our surrender to just that.

Sweet surrender!

By enacting the will to release it to God/Jesus/source - (whatever you name your universal power) and ask it to carry this hurt away from you.

Surrender and activate the strength of your positive ego and the collective consciousness of the masters of light behind you to make it happen. We can call in Gods and Goddesses of forgiveness to help us, like Quan Yin, Jesus Christ, Holy Mother Mary, Buddha.

So how do you forgive?

Invite help from your source, activate the light from within you and your divine masters, surrender, radically accept that you cannot change the past but only the future, and then release!

A year ago my brand new car was stolen. I meditated with Buddha and Jesus to reach the place of nonattachment. To forgive the thieves who took my car, as well as, some irreplaceable items near to my heart. I prayed for forgiveness for the thieves. "I forgive you," I would pray. And then I would say to myself, I forgive youfor leaving all the things I left in the car that disappeared with it. In the end it was stuff, but much of it was irreplaceable tools from my healing practice. This took focus, but in the end, it was easier to forgive than to accept the injury INTO my life. I held gratitude for the car and renters insurance to compensate me for what was lost and moved on. I let it go, and it gave myself new space and energy to focus on. I focused on what was going right in my life and forgave what wasn't.

The example of losing material stuff is an easy one.

Emotional forgiveness is much harder. A knife into the heart from someone you trust is one of the hardest wounds to heal and forgive. But it is also possible and when you reach that place you will stop the pattern from moving forward in your life. I speak from a place of great experience. I have been devastatingly betrayed at least 5 timesby past romantic partners The first time it happened I thought I had healed and moved on but I hadn't and it stunted my growth from age 22 to 45 years old. I played it safe (or so I thought) during those 23 years of life. I built walls so high around myself that I never thought I would be hurt again I cautiously entered relationships with men who didn't require me to be vulnerable. And I wasn't vulnerable. . I did not ever want to trust again because I never healed the first wound in my heart.. So, I settled for being in a guarded castle. And as a result, I invited in people to be romantic partners that felt no responsibility towards my heart and then replayed the same betrayal again and again. It was not until I took full personal responsibility for my choices and forgave myself that that specific knife in my heart could finally be removed and that space could start to then heal. The key out of my self imposed cage was forgiveness. And then immediately, as if by magic, my person who I could trust and form a healthy relationship entered my life.

With forgiveness came radical acceptance of myself. Self love. Self respect. There is nothing wrong with me. I am not perfect by far. But I did not do anything Wrong. I was just afraid to be hurt again - so much so, that I CLUNG to my walls of security too hard and perpetuated the hurt upon myself again and again. That is the lie of our negative ego. Stay Safe! Don't let go! It will get better if you just hold on to this hurt! This is the way you protect yourself.Instead, the opposite happens. You have to let it go. You have to forgive yourself. You have to forgive those who hurt you. Forgiving doesn't mean condoning or accepting the behavior or allowing the hurt back into your life. Forgiving isn't being a doormat. Forgiving means you radically accept the situation and let go of the need to change the past, so you can change the future. Don't condone it, but forgive it. Let go, so you can let in. "Forgive them Father, they know not what they do."

Injuries of the heart, like betrayal may be the hardest to get over. But at the same time because Forgiveness is an act of the heart, and therefore is an act of love, surrendering to its great Force can make it the easiest.

So, upon my release and actual acceptance and forgiveness of myself. My choice was to then radically love myself. My choice was to allow myself to y do more than yearn for a relationship. Give myself the ability to abandon my false sense of security for actual security. Then and only then did the wound dissipate in my heart and I was able to live freely and attract my highest good. I Love is the intercessor. s It is the force flowing through us. Become the container with an open heart - to receive it and then give it away. Love is not selfish. We are simply a conduit for its magic.

And now a quote from the gospel of Mary Magdalene "What binds me has been slain, and what surrounds me has been overcome, and my desire has ended, and ignorance has died. In a world, I was released from a world."

Without going on a tangent I want to note that in the Gospel of Mary, she explains the release from the 7 stages of the negative ego that bind us to our mundanity, our pain, our mediocrity, and keep us from evolving to our higher self and highest potential.

The key is Love. The key is forgiveness. The key is surrendering to the force of the power greater than our Monkey Mind.

She continues "I was released from a world, and in a type from a heavenly type, and from the fetter of oblivion which is transient. From this time I will attain to the rest of the time, of the season, of the eaon, in silence."

The chains that bind our heart and keep us trapped in pain are of our own creation. . And therefore, the will to set ourselves free is in our control. Forgiveness done right is powerful! In opening our heart to the force that is love, we receive more than we could ever "give." Forgiveness disconnects us from that which injures us and allows us to reconnect to a true source of light.The power to love and be loved in return, is the beautiful gift of forgiveness. Forgive and watch how your life changes.

If you still feel stuck and are in need of additional support - I can help with that! I would love to help you on your journey to love and light. Reach out to me through my website angellatterell.com and book a call.

Gratitude. Gratitude. Gratitude. What really is gratitude? I speak about it all the time. I share with students, clients, and colleagues - gratitude is the foundation of an Abundance Mindset and living a joyful life. But why? What is really happening with a gratitude grounded life?

Simply put, gratitude is the practice of appreciating what one has. On the next level it is the practice of appreciation for what one has, what one is given, and what one has lost. But it is more than that. It is a practice in being aware. To appreciate what one has - one must be first aware of what they have. To appreciate what one is given, one must be aware that they are being given things.

And to appreciate and hold gratitude for what has been taken away or lost - one must have an even greater awareness of cause & effect and other subtle hermetic universal principles at work - so you can see the quote, unquote "loss" for what it truly is. So if one is actually grateful, and truly holds appreciation for everything in their life (even the unpleasant stuff), then you are in a place of high vibrational awareness, clarity and discernment. Holding true sight and acknowledgement of what is going on around you and the ability to access wisdom and discern what is actually happening at any given time.

So, in short, gratitude = awareness. Awareness = discernment. Discernment = wisdom. Wisdom = Discernment. Discernment = Awareness. Awareness = gratitude.

And thus, we have a positive thought cycle occurring which allows us to live a joyful abundant life in flow with the universe even if our circumstances are filled with opportunity and challenge. In fact, we are more likely to seek opportunities and challenges because we have awareness, because we know that those difficult things we face are the fertilizer for the joy we grow.

A joyful life is not one without difficulties or sorrow. We all experience loss and grief in life because life ends. We lose loved ones to death. This is the only certainty in life. That this physical life ends. And along the way in our life we have people we love, and they grow old and die, or they are young and die from illness or tragedy. These are huge losses. But we continue. And those of us who learn in life how to continue and thrive are those who realize and are aware that this cycle in the physical body is not about learning how to survive - because that is the one impossible task. None of us get out alive. This experience in the physical body is about learning how to live and to see the glory that is everything we are given, everything we have, and everything we experience—even the losses. Jesus said to his disciples when you can truly SEE, then you will enter the kingdom of heaven. He was talking about discernment and gratitude. True awareness. When you can truly see what life offers you are capable of gratitude, and when you have awareness, gratitude and discernment - you enter the kingdom of heaven—a joyful life.

What is more heavenly than to be able to look at a shit storm in your life and say Thank You Universe for this opportunity. I am so grateful I had this experience.

I've been reflecting on gratitude all month. At the end of August I had the opportunity to be faculty for an attorney retreat and intensive where we engaged in some serious learning about different life insurance vehicles and annuities interspersed with meditation, personal development, and fun outdoor activities.We pushed ourselves out of our comfort zones in order to learn and shift ourselves and our practices for the sake of being better advisors to our clients. For me, I was also there holding a container for everyone to meditate and grow within, while keeping the focus on gratitude. Because with gratitude we can learn better, we can accept change better, we can live better. It is an essential element to anyone's life but especially for times of change, growth, and obstacles. And in order to change how one does something, or accept and adapt to a forced change we have to expend energy - we have to move out of the groove we have been in to shift into a new one. No more autopilot. Time to expend effort little by little every day until we get to the new phase of our becoming.

Gratitude helps us with this because when we start with awareness and recognition of everything we have in our environment to support us (even if it is just out own wits), and we see just how good it is, then we do not have to expend energy worrying about the lack and attracting more lack, we aren't running away from anything, we are moving towards something. And if that which we focus on expands it continues in the positive manifestation zone and we manifest that which we desire to bring about, versus that which we are trying to leave behind.

As an attorney, I find it exceptionally important to always be finding ways to hold gratitude and create containers for my clients that allow them to move toward things. Lawyers in a traditional sense are called upon only when there is a problem. We are the solvers. Or the ones that must help people through an unpleasant situation, or we are the ones causing the unpleasant situation because we manage litigation in a win-lose system. Winning in the law is determined by whether or not the proper procedure is followed - which for the average person is not winning. People want wrongs righted, justice served - but the law cannot really provide that - legal "justice" is not moral justice or God's justice - is simply checking all the boxes in the proper order and following the proper rules. What the law can provide however, are strong containers of prevention and protection to ensure to the best of our ability that bad things don't happen, and worse things don't happen when bad things do occur (especially in the case of dying). But for me that isn't enough either - I don't want to just prevent something, I want to create containers for my clients that also grow in abundance alongside providing protection. And what I learned in my attorney summer camp experience in August was the missing piece on how to use planning to build actual abundance and wealth for families. A true abundance manifestation goal versus just the mindset of planning with the end in mind and using that to expand on opportunities through prevention and protection planning. Now my understanding of life insurance, its strategic use in retirement planning, saving plans and investment, as well as the access to an extremely knowledgeable team of resources that I can consult with to guide my clients, has opened up a huge new gallery of wealth building containers that every family can take advantage of. And it gives me great joy to be able to offer a direction that is truly an Abundance building methodology.

As I write this it is Fall Equinox. Mabon in the Wiccan calendar. A day of gratitude and appreciation, bringing balance into our lives as we harvest the fruits of our efforts and give thanks for them. This autumn I am holding immense gratitude for my new partner in life and everything he has brought into my life, as well as everything he has given me, and alongside this relationship those things which have been lost. I hold gratitude for all of it - and for all of the growth I've experienced as a result of being in a real relationship with someone willing to do the work next to me. It's not all roses and sunbeams, and his health is far from good, but I wouldn't trade this time to be in something else with someone else.

I am beyond grateful for the opportunity to experience something so real with someone so willing & capable of being themself with me. This relationship that brings me such great joy also reminds me of the short and preciousness of life. I've never been one to sit by the wayside and not squeeze the marrow out of life—but since Covid I have to admit that all I've done is work and fit my relationships in inbetween. When sitting next to my partner and knowing that with his particular health challenges, that our life together is more likely to be truncated than not - it adds an urgency to living. Death is a reality for everyone, and I spend a lot of my time reminding people of that because I am an estate planning attorney - but when it is on your own doorway - it is no longer a philosophical conversation. It is happening. And this is where gratitude is my foundation now, more than ever. The kind of appreciation that keeps me in full awareness so that I can truly see, discern, and live in the kingdom of heaven right now in this physical body enjoying my life in the present moment, for what it is.

Jesus said Come to know what is in front of you, and that which is hidden from you will become clear to you.

This is gratitude. Clarity. Awareness. Discernment. Recognition.

"Whoever has (something) in his hand, (something more) will be given to him.

And whoever has nothing, even the little he has will be taken from him."

So, your homework this month is to determine what you have through the practice of gratitude. Build your foundation to live a joyful life by creating and cultivating your garden of appreciation for every aspect of your life - even the hard parts.

"Do as I do, be as I am. " Jesus Christ

"When we strive to become better than we are, everything around us becomes better too." Paulo Coelho (author of The Alchemist)

Sometimes we forget who we are. Sometimes we think, is this all there is? And if that is true, what is the point of all of this? We all can feel stuck. Trapped even. Unable to get out of the web of the choices we made to get to this point. And then when you are so wrapped in that silky meshy mess, panicking that the gross scary spider is going to come and get you that you lose sight of everything but the panic! The fear! The NEED to get OUT before the monster gets you! Then before you know it, this is what your life is - survival and fear. Trapped in a web and trying to get out.

No longer are you actually going anywhere. You are just GETTING OUT. But "getting out" is not a destination.

And OUT! Is driven by fear which has us thrashing around so much that we just wrap the web even thigh around ourselves so it is now even harder to achieve. It is like one of those Chinese finger traps,you played with as a kid - the harder you pull against it, the tighter it binds you.

But if we stop thrashing and fighting and fearing The Monster (the unknown). If we breathe and take a moment and ask ourselves. Where am I? Who am I? Where am I going? What do I actually want? Where do I want to go? What do I WANT to be doing right now? (in the positive, the answer can't be ESCAPING or ESCAPISM behavior). If all options are on the table, what would I actually choose to be doing to spend my time if I wasn't so scared and spending all my energy beating back the tides of change, fear, and all the things I don't want?

If you could articulate in the positive a destination. I want to be writing a book. I want to go to the gym twice a week. I want a job that fulfills me. I want to have a conversation with my partner. I want an abundant family. I want to laugh. Do you see where I am going with this? What can you articulate in the positive? What do you aspire for yourself? And yeah maybe your mind will say it's a pipe dream. But you know what? It is YOUR pipe dream. And if it brings you joy and light - why is it silly to aspire for that, and to do that, instead of just surviving? instead of just "getting away from THIS." Because running away is not a destination. Getting away is not a goal. It is running from the monster. Running away from the monster is not running to something at all - it is getting you lost deeper in the woods and going right into the belly of the beast.

If you feel trapped and depressed or scared of what is to come. What if you were not spending all of your time on surviving, on beating back the fear, or trying to get away? If you hate your job and every night you come home and drink a bottle of wine - what is that doing? That is just numbing the pain from the job you hate. Is it getting you a new job that is fulfilling? Is it raising your vibration to a place where you can see a new alternative? Is it giving you anything but escape? Yeah you are surviving the pain. But is that a life? Surviving and enslaved to something you hate?

Our negative ego is a real motherfucker. It makes us believe that running away is a solution. It says STAY SAFE! Don't leave this box. HIDE! Outside this box is failure - is the inability to pay your bills. Outside, is the eternal question, are you dying alone? Because it says you are not good enough. You don't deserve nice things. You are not capable. No one likes you. That is for other people. Other people write books, other people take fabulous vacations, other people get graduate degrees and careers they actually enjoy. It is an insidious record that keeps playing over and over again - that keeps you thrashing in the spider web you spun yourself. Keeps you making choices that keep you trapped in a cycle of fear and miserable-ness and not progressing toward something that will actually bring you satisfaction and joy.

And here is the secret. It is not in some new age book from the early 2000s called, The Secret or even just positive thinking, or in that next social media influencers webinar about the 10 steps to financial freedom and happiness. It is none of those things. It is in the most simple (but hard to practice) axiom of Know Thyself. Know thyself as God. Know thy own needs and wants. Your thoughts create your reality. Hermetic Principle #1 - All is Mind. 99% of your success in creating a change in your life comes from how you feel about the situation because every feeling creates a thought, and every thought is acted upon. So if we feel good about where we are going, and are actually consciously choosing where we are going, and know in your heart of hearts that where you are going is what you actually want to do - then you will follow that gratitude filled feeling, into a gratitude and hope filled thought, then apply consistency and discipline to carry out actions daily (little bits every day) that get you somewhere new that you actually WANT to be. And after some effort you will find yourself free of your bondage and looking forward to even more amazing things as you take action in the present moment. But until YOU CHOOSE an actual DESTINATION that you want and desire then you will never ever be able to get there. Because no one ever gets anywhere when you are running away from your life.

This is your life. You only get one. What do you want to be spending your precious minutes on? How much time and energy have you spent beating back the fear? What is the worst that could happen if you paused and surrendered to whatever you are avoiding and chose what you actually want? Then and only then do you realize just how futile and useless the fight that fear is. How irrelevant - and that all your writhing and drama and gesticulation was just an ugly dance that you can stop. And finally,with clarity and simplicity you can step out from by deciding with discernment and your will to set your mind, your thoughts, words and acts toward the true desire you have in your heart of hearts, for the best and highest good. Then you will be free of the bonds of the web you wove. The box you stapled yourself into and you can live as the god/goddess you truly are and start creating your reality.

And THIS is the magick that Jesus spoke of and embodied as a Hermetic teacher. This is why he was able to create miracles - and was trying to teach us to do the same. "Do as I do. Be as I am." "Everything I can do, you can do and more." Jesus Christ was a Hermetic Teacher. When he was alive there was no such thing as Christianity. There was Judaism and Jesus was ethnically Hebrew and he is referred to as a Rabbi but he wasn't Jewish either. In the annals of time and translation rabbi simply meant teacher. And Jesus was just that - a teacher of Hermetics. Hermetics and any Hermetic principle is from the mind of God. It is the understanding of God's mind without human pollution. If it is Hermetic it will benefit people and always be good. Because God does no harm. Hermetics creates clarity which simplifies life - thus increasing our potential to act as God in this life. Whereas the human mind creates complications and traps us in fictions and stories. And ultimately this is what Jesus was teaching - and like good humans we have complicated his words and made a religion out of him which separates what he could do from what we can do. Which is the exact opposite of his teaching. "Do as I do. Be as I am." In other words "Act like the God/Goddess you are. Master your mind by doing the will of God."

Jesus was and is one of the greatest teachers for humanity in all time - and as a master of light he mastered his negative ego completely in this physical life and as a result could create miracles. He used every single one of his gifts as a human being for its intended purpose in its intended way. And although he was special (because he had a unique mission to bring the ray of love and compassion to this planet for all of us to experience) his message to all of us was that HE WAS NOT SPECIAL. In that everything he could do, we can do. Our job is to LISTEN to him, to take him as an example of possibility and to start living that possibility. And through his teachings become the teachings - just as he was.

Now he did some amazing party tricks (though turning water into wine back in the day just made the water safe to drink) he also defied the laws of physics, cleared negativity, and cured the sick. However, the potential to do all of this is within us as well. And humans have created miracles again and again. The examples we have from the gospels (albeit told through the lens of religion, politics, two hundred or more years, translation from aramaic to greek to latin to english) are examples of a clear will (desire from a place of purity) applied with the rules of Hermetics and the power inherent in this existence as a fully actualized human being connected to spirit acknowledging our power as God - you can have a major impact on this physical world. You can defy the laws of physics. You can create miracles. You can just simply live a joyful life. But it all starts by setting your will in motion and remembering that you are god. You are a powerful being that can affect your reality through your feelings, thoughts, choices and actions.

With Jesus we weren't supposed to start a religion. We were supposed to discern. To learn. To follow in his footsteps versus follow him. If we say "Jesus take the wheel!" you abdicate responsibility for your life and that is in the exact opposite of what he was getting at for us. Did we ever hear of Jesus saying "Father DO everything FOR me?" Yet we do this all the time with Jesus, with our jobs, by blaming other people, by pouring our sorrows into a bottle or any other substance. We abdicate our responsibility and we run away to our hiding place prison and we stay safe in our survival mechanisms.

Bringing me back to my point. All of us forget how powerful we are from time to time. Or maybe we have no fucking clue we have any power at all. We forget or are completely ignorant that in most cases we actually hold the keys to let ourselves out from our chosen prison.

We are all at some point like the figures in the The Devil card of the Rider Waite Tarot deck -held in chains to a big hairy winged beast of a problem but the chains are actually loose enough to simply lift off of our necks, if we desire to remove them. We chain ourselves to the false God (the thing outside of ourselves that is not us). We chain ourselves to the Devil, to a demon, to a false idol, we make something or something else God, and we deny our own power. We say we have no choice. We had to. I need this escape to cope because I can't leave him or her. I can't leave my job. I'll die if I remove the chains of slavery. But you won't - the truth is you've abdicated your power and voluntarily chained yourself to the external thing and forgotten your power as God. As the author of your story. As the determinant of your own destiny. Then you've focused on staying safe, or getting away, or NOT being in the chains you feel trapped in.

I've been personally chewing on all of this because recently I felt a little bit trapped by my own circumstances. Even though I KNEW LOGICALLY that it was all my choice and all really for the good. But in preparing for the Florida Bar Exam for over 7 months it started to take a toll on me and I began to forget why I was doing it. And as my ability to focus on my business was distracted by study, my partner's health, my own arthritis pain, my sense of lack when some things didn't go as planned and I was disappointed by some individuals. I spent every last bit of my effort preparing for the test then used what little I had left to move twice and learn how to be in a new cohabitation situation. And with my distractions and the challenges - I stopped flowing the normal abundant client load I usually do for a myriad of reasons. And of course I started getting concerned that I didn't have enough time or money and my thoughts and feelings turned to lack and fear and this just enhanced the worry and lack and thus had me starting to feel trapped. Trapped because passing the bar is a big slow thing and Seattle is far away from my home in Florida, and trapped because I have to be vulnerable in my relationship and I can't run away anymore. And trapped because I have to communicate about my finances and don't have the same overflow I'm used to. All of these things were not helpful. Because I said before 99% of your success is how you FEEL about something versus the actual tactical logical work you put into it. So here I was working in a way that SHOULD have resulted in my usual flow but it wasn't - but the thing that was off was my fear. It was my lack mentality. Plans are definitely still helpful but your own thoughts will destroy the best plan. So as long as I feel scared and trapped and in lack, that is the energy I am going to attract. And no one wants a worried estate planning attorney or an abundance & flow coach who is in lack.

But luckily I have a practice and a path to follow and a community of lightworkers to recharge in. I have teachings and things to study that can bring me around and back to my core purpose, strengthen my will, and turn me back to gratitude. So this trap was a brief mindset blip and now that I'm out of the gauntlet I can actually start holding gratitude for the bar exam and the time to work on client flow, teamwork with my new team members and communication with my love and life partner. I remember why I am doing this work. My law license allows me to help so many families create plans that will protect them in their time of need. And my purpose and mission in light work helps me remember I am not trapped. I am choosing this. I will allow the will of God to flow through me. And use Jesus as a light and as a master teacher guiding my heart in every moment. Because that is where he has been since I was a small child, guiding me to live as he lived. Do as he did. To be in my life an embodiment of his teachings in my unique way in this physical life. There is nothing to run away from. I am not stuck in any trap. I choose everything and I can remove any obstacle. And I have built a beautiful life based on my choices and I will continue to do so. A joyful life doesn't result from things being easy or handed to you - in fact sometimes the hardest things in life bring the most value.

I laugh as I wonder which was harder? The Florida Bar exam or being vulnerable and in true partnership with another human being. . To be honest, I know it is the latter. Taking a test and getting a piece of paper is easy. I've done it time and time again. Helping people as a lawyer is easy. I've done it time and time again. But being in a relationship with someone I love and who loves me, growing myself and actualizing myself as an authentic human being is incredibly challenging! Don't get me wrong - I have prayed and manifested this type of partnership and love, but that doesn't make it not terrifying. To be even more honest, sometimes coexisting and being in real love with my person, scares the living shit out of me. Because my negative ego is constantly being proved wrong. I am lovable separate from the things I provide to people in this world. What a concept? I feel like - even now I have to say it twice to truly believe it. I AM LOVEABLE DESPITE WHAT SERVICE I CAN PROVIDE FOR OTHERS! … and you are too.

I am God. YOU ARE GOD. WE ARE GOD. Fully worthy of giving and receiving tremendous amounts of love + prosperity. So let's start creating some miracles - shall we?

The homework for this episode is simple - well that is, if you allow it to be.

Love yourself like your life depends on it - because it does. Know Thyself. Know God. Do as God would do. And CHOOSE to love yourself more than your struggle.

Don't overthink it - just start - a small change in the right direction can make a huge impact.

And if you get lost along the way and need further inspiration - I can help with that! Drop me a line at [email protected]. I will leave you in the words of author Roald Dahl

"And above all watch with glittering eyes the whole world around you because the greatest secrets are always in the most unlikely places. Those who don't believe in magick will never find it."

"Do the best you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better." Maya Angelou

It is the day after Independence Day. I'm watching the street sweeper brush up the remnants of yesterday's fireworks shells on the neighborhood streets of Jacksonville Beach, Florida. The detritus of the party is all that is left after America's red, white and blue holiday. Last night thousands of people poured past the front of my house to go to the beach to watch the fireworks and celebrate freedom and independence. Thousands of explosions small and large rocked the beach and I was in the middle of it. A far cry from the remote shores of Lake Superior in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan where I have spent the last 10 years celebrating the holiday with my sister and family.

But nothing is at all like the past for me this year and it has me examining my attachments really closely and getting super clear on what truly is conscious choice and surrender. Because somewhere in between that lies True Freedom in this lifetime.

True freedom isn't surrendering to the current and going with the flow that others set for us. A lot of people think that is an easy life - just let go! Don't choose, let life take you as it may - everything happens for a reason etc…That's just floating. Delegating your personal responsibility for your life to others so you have the excuse "I was just going with the flow!" or "I had no choice!" You did though. You chose not to choose in that situation because something in your programming, that artificial intelligence of your negative ego, has you so afraid to do so. whether you believe you can't have nice things, or you are so afraid to fail, or who knows what your damage is, but if you never examine the baggage you carry, you will never know.

On the other side, is someone like me. Controlling every single aspect of everything in your life with an exacting plan that everything must go according to, or else. Achieving the objective of the moment. Because achievement of the next thing is the highest good. Except sometimes, er, well, a lot of the time, my objective is misinformed because it comes from my subconscious programming and I am not aware of that, until it's too late. If you try to control every little thing you are so busy controlling you can't see or hear the signs that there is something better or that a higher path could open up, paved in opportunities. Except in these situations I honestly believe I am acting from conscious choice when I double down in stubborn determinism and radical self reliance "to make it work!" to "achieve the gold star!" to "take care of the problem!" But as my recent move from St. Augustine to my partner's house in Jax Beach proves - NO, I'm not always aware of how my thoughts are creating my reality. And I made a lot of things harder on myself by just assuming I had to do it all myself because that is the way it has always been.

Meanwhile my partner is left wondering why I didn't trust him enough to ask for help. And I realized I didn't because I assumed I couldn't and I was afraid of retribution for asking at all. So yeah - I didn't trust.

So here I am - surrendering to the change and the shift - all beautiful things coming from being in partnership with another but I was completely unwilling to look at how I approached a situation with him on my team, or even being on a team period. Huh. Was that conscious choice from my higher self? I couldn't let go of control and my subconscious programming for two seconds, I reacted and went right into "do it all yourself" mode.

But I won't do that specific thing again. Now that I see it and can be willing to let it go. I can learn from it and be aware in the future and not do it that way again. No shame, no blame or guilt. Yes I was emotional when the situation was brought up for me to look at it. But most of it was from the release of all that stored shit in my subconscious and it wasn't directed at anybody, as much as it was messy. Literally my suitcase of unexpressed emotion was strewn all over my partner's living room. And luckily he's very patient and held space to let me work it through.

So how do we know if we are surrendering our attachments and living and choosing from the collective consciousness of the higher selves and ascended masters i.e. the positive ego, free of the negative ego and shadow self?

We can't sit there and analyze every action. Or can we? No, we can't - that analysis paralysis would be using our lower self to attempt to solve the problem that got us there in the first place. We have to use discernment. And this is where training comes in and the invocation of the Adept Initiate.

"It is by will alone that I set my mind in motion."

Every human being, myself very much included, is far from perfect but the path to know thyself allows us to get clearer and clearer every day such that we begin to know ourselves as the creator of our reality and to be able to tap into the will of God and the universe - and with that understanding of the higher good we use our mind as a tool versus us becoming a tool of the mind.

Monkey mind gets in the back seat where it belongs in a seat belt strapped in. We sit in the driver's seat with a GPS from a higher power and are capable of managing our thoughts, words, and deeds towards the best and highest good we know at the moment.

How do we get here? Through daily will strengthening exercises. Through daily boundary setting exercises. And learning through doing - achieving the understanding of where I begin and end. Understanding my true needs and wants and where they begin and end. What my wants truly are and how to choose, not out of fight or flight but from nurture and love for self and others. All of this combined with meditation so there is actual space for mental clarity and the light of God i.e. enlightenment, whatever you choose to call it, to come in.

From that place we can begin to experience True Freedom. Freedom from triggers, from self defeating patterns, from digging ourselves into deeper holes when we think we are solving problems. And when we know ourselves better there are less surprises and we can surrender to the positive will of the universe, letting go of our crap and allowing help to come in when it is offered (among other things.)

As I just shared in my example today, by no means is the path of the adept initiated in the lineage of King Salomon a magick pill that makes you perfect and cures all ills in life. But if you are willing to do the work it is exceptionally rewarding and leads to the ability to enjoy limitless freedom and joy in this physical existence - improving your daily life gradually with proven repeatable methods.

If you are interested in learning about these practices and the path of an adept initiate offered in the Empower Thyself program please reach out, I can connect you to a practitioner in your area.

Alright my friends, until next time, do your best until you know better, then do better! And if you need help along the way - I can help with that!

"Love God and then do whatever you wish." St. Augustine

This is the quote for the spiritual experience of the sun tarot card in my ultimate guide to the Raider Waite Tarot book. I had to laugh as I read it this morning sitting down to write this podcast.

I decided to write about the sun card because it is the solstice, and the sun symbolizes rebirth and daily renewal. And surprise! This month and for the rest of this year I am in a process of change and renewal yet again. I'm currently writing this on my deck in St. Augustine, Florida. Inside my little house in the woods surrounded by magick and elemental beings are boxes ready to be packed and put into storage. I'm moving. Again. I just put the last of my Seattle life into a storage locker at my good friend's condo and now I am putting my St. Augustine things into storage until November when I hopefully move into my new house that is currently being built.

"Birth is not a momentary event, but a permanent process. Our aim in life is to become completely born…living means being born every minute." Erich Fromm.

The process of rebirth for me has been going on for years. But more intensely these last 2 since I was called to step up in my spiritual practice and make this move to St. Augustine. I keep laughing because it really seems to keep getting more intense when silly me thought it would chill out by now. But relocating your life and business across the country is a process. All good things - meeting the love of one's life, co-creating a new home together, establishing a foothold in a new city, building a new community, taking yet another bar exam (I could do without this step but it's a right of passage in my profession) - these are all major things. As is exiting a place (Seattle) where you built a life for the past 20 years.

What I'm learning in part is surrender. Allowing the will of God to flow through me. Allowing the highest good to flow through me. And not being an obstacle to my own birthing process. Not being an obstacle to my own greatness and purpose. I will, thy will, I say. Let my greatest desire be that I fulfill my contract with God. The purpose I made for myself when I was spirit before I had amnesia caused by this physical density.

So, I am attempting to understand with my higher self my needs and wants. Then holding the vision for them to be met. And thus arranging my priorities to ensure that energetically, and then physically. Versus clinging to my past self and fighting the process. I surrender to the process of rebirthing.

So I shared the quote that I read and laughed out loud when looking at The Sun card. There are no coincidences that St. Augustine himself is speaking to me today. Love God i.e. love yourself and all beings and allow the will of god to flow through you. Then do what you want. Well, when the will of god flows through you - you become an agent for the best and highest good.

December of 2023 marked one year of my leap of faith to move to St. Augustine. And although it was a month of upheaval and unmet expectations for myself and others it was actually really great - because I put my house in order. I had to sit down with myself and decide the priorities for Angel's life. What was it that I really desired and wanted in my life? Yes, I want to do God's will but I'm not a robot. I'm a human being with needs and wants and one of our 4 basic needs is love. I decided that the most important thing to me in my life was to find my life partner. Someone I could spend my life with who would love me for me, and I would love them for them in return - and we could be a team. Team us.

I also decided that I was going to fully let go of Seattle. That I was going to ground my light here in St. Augustine. I was going to plant my energy in this soil and build my life here instead of traversing the country every other week or month and running myself ragged in the process.

The result of this decision? Within 2 months I was registered for the Florida Bar Exam, I found a location for my light center at the Center for Spiritual Living, and I was in a relationship with a person that I love and who loves me in return, who actually wants to spend their life with me as a team. Not someone in it for some sense of immediate gratification but actual loyalty and commitment to building a relationship and all the co-creation that goes with that. And as a result of all of that, here I am. Moving and rebirthing myself again.

But not chaotically. I'm executing (with assistance) the vision of grounding myself here in St. Augustine and the universe is supporting me because it's in alignment with my purpose.

How do I know? Because I trust my higher self, I trust the tools of my spiritual practice and the law of the universe I am watching at play around me. I'm far from perfect, or a perfect situation but I'm doing my best and I am holding gratitude for everything given and taken away.

So let's talk about The Sun card and the summer solstice for a second. The Sun = the active principle. As the moon stands for the collective unconscious the sun stands for the collective Consciousness. Being able to be free from autonomous programming and making actual choices authentically from our free will. I'm going to take a step further and say that true choice from our freest of free wills comes from our positive ego that is connected to the holy spirit i.e. the collective consciousness of the ascended masters (these are those who have mastered their negative ego and now live to support those of us in the physical world i.e. Jesus, Buddha, Quan Yin, Isis, Osiris, Odin, Freya, Lakshmi, Ganesha, any archetype from any culture..the ascended masters are numerous).

If we are connecting with our higher self and making discerning choices for our nurture and wellbeing out of love for ourselves and others we are truly living from free will and influenced by the conscious positive collective consciousness.

On the other side, if all we are doing is playing out a record of our story fueled by programming from our subconscious (our stored repository of unexpressed and repressed emotions i.e. that suitcase full of crap you had to sit on to close and hide under your bed). Are you really living fully? If you are motivated only by fear, jealousy, stress, pain, or the avoidance of pain your negative ego says is necessary to survive? Is that truly a choice? Or are you choosing to be a slave to your masks, your negative ego, and unmanaged emotions? I'd say so - choosing to stay in the prison of fear we build for ourselves because we are afraid to try something different, or think it will hurt is not living.

Life is filled with a myriad of opportunities to fuck up. That's the point! To learn by failing forward and making mistakes. Picking yourself up when you fall down and saying "well, maybe I won't do it that way again." But a lot of us (and I have been guilty of this myself) say "I have no choice!" I have to stay here doing this thing this way because if I change I'll die. Our negative ego is so caught up in our fight or flight mechanism we really do equate change to death.

But that is a lie. Change is rebirth. Growth is freedom. Failing is movement. And if you are not moving forward you are going backwards and you are letting your subconscious rule the show. Instead we should go arms open naked on a white horse into the sun of a new day smiling because if we fall off it was one hell of a ride.

Now - the solstice! The sun is at its peak! This is the time of action. Of light. Of celebration and growth. We have all the vitamin D and all of the time and energy to accomplish all of the things! Now is the time of Joy and Illumination. Of healing by shining light on that which was hidden. And it's the time of the masculine energetic active principle. So see what there is to see and be in the now making choices from your positive ego for the best and highest good.

And that is your assignment this month. Do or do not. There is no Try. Go forth! Be in the now. Get 'er done. Live your life. Fail gloriously and celebrate the victory of doing something differently than you did before.

I love you all. And as always if you need any assistance with this assignment or anything else - I can help with that! Until next time. Go frolic in the Sun and live joyfully.