Today on Mystery Crate, we’ve got a loaded show.
Zas debuts Big Ass Story Time with an emotional trip back to Magic Johnson’s unforgettable 1992 NBA All-Star Game moment. Jeremy finally gets the floor to defend his Bam Adebayo superstar take after Bam’s wild 83-point performance sparks chaos, conspiracy theories, and plenty of hater energy.
Then the crew dives into a Quentin Tarantino tier list, arguing over where classics like Pulp Fiction, Inglourious Basterds, Django Unchained, Kill Bill, and more actually belong. Plus: Jess has thoughts, Jeremy tells a Broadway story involving Daniel Radcliffe, Roy recaps losing to a bunch of children in barbecue, and the whole show somehow becomes exactly what Mystery Crate should be: loud, chaotic, and ridiculous.
Featuring:
-Zas’ Big/Old  Ass Story Time
-Jeremy defending Bam Adebayo
-Quentin Tarantino movie tier rankings
-Roy’s Key West barbecue recap
-Jess, naturally, having something to say

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A new era of Mystery Crate officially begins — and it starts the only way we know how: arguing about the cold open, bullying each other’s “sexy voice,” and accidentally creating a year-long competition that will absolutely ruin friendships.
In this episode, we introduce Zas Storytime (Z-Storytime?), where Zas takes us back to old sports lore — including the day Glenn Rice dropped 56 and Zas basically chose basketball over Passover (no regrets). Then it gets even weirder: the infamous Bar Mitzvah shirt story (and the hunt for the legendary tank top continues).
Plus: Punch the Monkey returns to the group chat thanks to a wild Christian Bale clip, the crew debates WWE and Elimination Chamber, and someone makes the case that Tom Brady vs Logan Paul might actually be a thing (Vegas energy!).
And because the internet demanded it: we break down the viral McDonald’s CEO vs Burger King CEO burger bite videos — including the most timid bite in fast-food history and why calling a burger an “excellent product” is a red flag.
Finally, the big moment: we pick captains for the brand-new Mystery Crate team competition — a season-long format with drafts, trades, and enough petty scorekeeping to power the show for months.

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On this episode of Mystery Crate, things spiral immediately.
Mike Fuentes attempts to defeat Chris Cote by taking on the 6 McDonald’s cheeseburger challenge — can he actually finish six McDonald’s cheeseburgers in one sitting? From there, the show derails into a full-blown argument about the Renaissance Festival (Ren Faire) — is dressing up medieval and drinking all day harmless fun, or is it officially “dorky”? The crew debates nerd vs dork culture, tailgates vs Ren Fests, and whether calling something “dorky” is secretly an insult.
We also:
-Try beef bacon and compare it to pork bacon (yes, this gets serious)
-Debate Game of Thrones vs Lord of the Rings
-Pitch a George R.R. Martin hot tub sitcom theory about why he hasn’t finished Game Of Thrones
-React to viral AI LeBron James videos
-Develop a brand-new fear of sinkholes in Florida
-Talk Knight of the Seven Kingdoms and the future of the Game of Thrones universe

If you’re here for fast food challenges, fantasy book conspiracies, Ren Faire arguments, or pure Mystery Crate nonsense — this episode has all of it.

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GREG COTE IS HERE on Mystery Crate — and we put him to work immediately: a full-on Frank’s RedHot taste test (original, buffalo, garlic parm, pineapple Hawaiian, ghost pepper ranch, spicy maple and more) to rank his top 3 hot sauces like it’s a “Hot Ones” episode… but with chips and a very loud front-chewer.
We also revisit Greg’s Love Guru moment from last week (yes, that advice), debate how many days is too long for a cruise, swap casino stories (including the infamous “caramel popcorn vape” incident), and somehow end up inventing a Toyota wave while arguing about waving etiquette, bike helmets, and why small talk ruins your whole day.

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Chris Cote attempts the ultimate McDonald’s cheeseburger challenge — how many plain McDonald’s cheeseburgers can he eat in one show? We set the over/under at 5.5 burgers, the burgers hit the table, and Chris hits the wall (with the mic paying the price).
Then we jump into the viral ChatGPT celebrity parents trend and let AI pick our “celebrity mom and dad”… and it gets WEIRD (Roy gets an all-time pairing, Jess gets absolutely robbed, and everyone’s face gets “AI’d” into chaos). Plus: Winter Olympics talk, curling discourse, the “quad god” figure skating hype, and the crew realizing AI fake videos are getting too real to spot.
If you’re into food challenges, McDonald’s, AI trends, and chaotic sports-adjacent conversations… this one’s for you.
Subscribe for more Mystery Crate: new episodes, dumb debates, and challenges that should not be attempted during the workday.

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After the show's successful experiment of having Zas try different sodas, Roy is forced to try a random item from the studio's kitchen. The show then explores the ghosts of Super Bowls past as they remember moments from the last few Super Bowls the show has traveled too. Chris Cote then questions the judging of the The Westminster Kennel Club dog show. Later, Jessica has no idea the segment has ended and Cote is challenged to see how many McDonald's Cheeseburgers he can eat in an hour.

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Zaslow joins Mystery Crate to do something he has never done as a 45 year old man, try different sodas including a dreaded root beer. He also wants you to know that 'Sinners' is just a great movie and not the greatest movie of all time. Jessica got engaged and the group is excited to hear exactly how Lee pulled it off. Finally the crew fawns over Zohran Mamdani's Carhartt jacket and Jessica is worried about her long toe.

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On a lean episode if Mystery Crate, the crew discusses the proper way to be a house guest when you take a trip or the best way to not be one at all. Chris Cote believes he is on a hot streak when it comes to ordering good food and suggests he can manipulate his daughter into ordering things he wants to try. Finally, the crew deep dives the hit HBO hockey/love story "Heated Rivalry."

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The boys bring Rose in on an impromptu game of Dominoes annoying Mike Fuentes who is just trying to do a podcast. The crew then quickly gives their takes on the finale of Netflix's "Stranger Things" before diving in to Chipotle's new ridiculous high protein menu. Chris Cote then figures out what type of water heater he has in his house and finally we ask Roy, "Whose Snore is This?"

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The crew breaks down the conclusion of Stranger Things, agreeing that no matter how it ended, people were going to hate it anyway. From there, they zoom out and celebrate the fact that we’re living in a rare moment with a lot of genuinely good TV to watch, including Heated Rivalry on HBO. The conversation then takes a hard left into why bowling is way more complex than just throwing a ball down a lane, Jessica’s celebrity sightings on the streets of New York during break, Mike Fuentes reading headlines, and Cote finally revealing his closely guarded tuna fish recipe. It’s TV takes, niche passions, and unnecessary secrets — exactly how Mystery Crate should.

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