Leaning Toward Wisdom

She was in the midst of a struggle. It was fresh though, which is never the best time to do much more than encourage. We reviewed the facts - the things she knew to be true as opposed to the things she could be assuming. At some point I said it.

"I'm sure there's a way forward."

Just because it's not apparent right now doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Figuring out ways to escape isn't often apparent. You've got to search high and low, devoting yourself to figuring it out. I'm thinking of that classic film, The Great Escape. Those prisoners of war had to consider a variety of paths forward in their attempt to escape. It required lots of thinking, pondering, planning, debating, and figuring it out. It also involved many setbacks and high risks.

Nobody said the path forward would be apparent or easy. Besides all that, sometimes endurance is the path forward. Not overcoming.

I've lost some friends - close friends - to fatal health issues. There was no overcoming of their illness. But each of them had to find a path forward so they could more successfully endure their eventuality.

Pain. Sorrow. Sadness. Disappointment.

EVERYBODY has experienced plenty of it. EVERYBODY has plenty of things they could dwell on to serve as excuses. EVERYBODY has lots of circumstances - some beyond their control and some not - that might compel them to embrace being "victims." NONE of us are immune.

A few years ago I suffered a personal setback. One I've alluded to in the past. It prompted me to surround myself with older men - each one a gospel preacher who I'd known all my life. I figured these were the guys who could help me find a way forward. And sure enough, they did.

I'm unsure of how timing works. I'm very sure about God's providence though - meaning God's ability to work through the natural courses of life. We all make up our own mind. We make choices and behave in ways we choose. The Bible pretty clearly teaches us that God can and does use the natural events and circumstances of life for his Will. If I choose to behave poorly, it's not God's fault. He's not behind it. It's my own free will in motion. But my poor choice can still be leveraged by God to serve some purpose that may not be clear for a long time - if ever.

One by one these 3 older sages in my life passed on...leaving me alone and pretty much without any more older men in my life who had served me as they had all my life. I'm not bringing it up to lament my plight, but to illustrate how urgent it is for all of us - no matter what we're facing - to find a way forward. My confession is that when I lost the first one I took great comfort that I had him for as long as I did. I was especially thankful to have had him over the course of the previous year plus. His wisdom was unparalleled. But I was also very grateful I still had the other two even though both had serious health issues (one more so than the other).

Curveballs enter everybody's life. Mine came when the seemingly healthier of the two was suddenly gone. Even though he was the oldest of the 3 - the youngest was the first to pass - none of us were expecting it. The suddenness of death is always a jolt.

Within a short time, the 3rd and final old man left the planet and entered Eternity. It was expected, but that didn't make it any easier. Now there were none and my path forward was not apparent. During dark days of sadness and sorrow, it's hard to find enough light with which to see any path or way. I'm a lifelong insomniac. Inside the Yellow Studio is a red light bulb I burn at night - like an old photographer's darkroom. It provides enough light to see without illuminating the house and waking up Rhonda. But I'll often traipse into the kitchen from my studio and without any lights on...and my eyes adjusted to the red glow...

Jason Wilber was John Prine's longtime lead guitarist and musical director. John died during this pandemic. Jason released a new album after John passed. It's entitled, Time Traveler and contains a song, Poet's Life. Today's show title is a lyric from that song.

How do you measure a pleasure or an itch?

I don't know. But I don't know how you measure sadness, sorrow or disappointment either? So my inability to measure such things runs in every direction.

I've been sharing way too much Billy Strings with the private Facebook group lately. Billy Strings is William Apostol. He's a 27 year old guitar whiz kid who combines heavy metal with bluegrass. Yeah, I know. Sounds nuts, right? Well, it's not nuts. It's brilliant.



Billy is one of those artists that I'll binge on a few times a year. I'll just listen and watch everything I can for 2 weeks straight. Mostly in complete amazement at how somebody can be so proficient at something at such a young age. I look over in the corner at my encased acoustic guitar, which I'm unable to play - and I think of measuring the value of a guitar in Billy's hands versus a guitar in my hands. At least you could kinda sorta measure that by looking at how much income Billy earns playing the guitar versus the zero dollars I'll ever earn with a guitar. My only chance of making money on a guitar is if I sell mine!

I grew up hearing preachers deliver sermons about the powerful impact of godly women. Much of the time they'd speak of how priceless a godly wife, mother or grandmother was. And since I had all three, I can attest to the high value they deliver. But I'm not able to measure it.

Proverbs 31:10 "Who can find a virtuous woman? for her price is far above rubies."

I can't play the guitar, but I sure do enjoy watching and listening to Billy Strings perform. In the last 2 weeks, I've likely spent over 50 hours listening to my Billy Strings' records (okay, they're digital) and watching his YouTube concerts. I love watching the guy perform. Many nights in the last 2 weeks his songs have been earworms.

Many things are hard to measure.

But maybe it's worth asking, "Why measure them anyway?"

The square, super-logical among us would say, "Because you can't make progress unless you can measure it." Check out The Squircle Academy if you want to investigate circles and squares.

Ridiculous. Of course, you can make progress in something that can't be measured.

Some aspects of love may be measurable, but it's pretty hard.

John 15:13 "Greater love has no one than this, that one lay down his life for his friends."

So there's the pinnacle, right? Hatred is at the opposing extreme I reckon. But what about all that space in between?

I fell in love with my wife in the summer of 1975. After 42 years of marriage, I love her more now than then. I don't have any paperwork to prove it. Nor do I have any assessment I can show off to her. I just know how I feel and what I think. I can measure it intuitively. By how important she is to me. By how devastated I'd be if something bad were to happen to her. By how lonely I'd be without her. By the value she provides to my life.

Family. Friends. Allies. Mentors. Teachers.

How do you measure their value?

Billy Strings said this in a magazine interview...

Those moments are what I cherish the absolute most. For instance, when I was six or seven years old, I was learning “Beaumont Rag,” and I just played the rhythm, but I kept messing it up in this one part. Right in the middle of the song, I said, “Stop. Dad, why don’t you play it and let me listen?” I listened to what he was trying to say with the guitar, and I go, “Now, let me try it again,” and I nailed it. He started laughing.

NOTE: I began preparing for this episode some days before the violent death of George Perry Floyd Jr. in Minneapolis at the hands of a police officer. As violence broke out across the country it seemed best to stay silent and observe. And listen. The irony of the title of today's episode wasn't lost on me. It was purely coincidental. I was already thinking very seriously about my own urge to be quieter in some specific areas of life. If you've listened to the COVID19 episodes you could likely figure out that my tolerance of highly opinionated, judgmental people is eroding. I've never much cared for it, but if the coronavirus didn't bring such people out of the woodwork, this current ordeal surely has. I simply want you to know that today's show is not a response to specific incidents or any news, but today's show is mostly provoked by human behavior. Disagreement. Anger. Assumption. Judgment. Strife. Contention. No big shock really. Behaving poorly is almost always the easy choice. Doing the right thing - behaving with kindness - requires more from us. At the beginning of the pandemic, I began to post some audio sermons in a YouTube playlist entitled, In Thy Paths. The first sermon (21 minutes long) was entitled, A Certain Samaritan Answers The Question, "Who is my neighbor?" I've embedded it here in case you want to give it a listen. Even if you're irreligious I hope the message will resonate with you. So with that, let's talk about moving in silence. Thank you for hitting that play button. I know your time is valuable and I can't properly thank you enough for giving me your time and attention. Without you, I'm just a guy talking to himself into a microphone!



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It started some time ago with Baker Mayfield, starting quarterback for the Cleveland Browns, but most notable in my book as being the OU Sooner Heisman Trophy winner. Last year I was highly entertained by him, as usual. But I'm a fan, so that's my bias. During the offseason - and even during the season - Baker was widely criticized for being too loud and talkative. Prior to the beginning of this weird 2020 season, Baker decided it was time to start "moving in silence" - a quote from his press conference that captured my attention.

John Prine's song had already been in my ears and on my mind, Quiet Man. And for weeks I'd been giving serious consideration to my urge to become quieter, not in a podcasting sense necessarily, but in other real-life situations. Truth was, I had made up my mind weeks ago that I was going to be much quieter in some areas of my life.



And there's more music about silence or quiet, too. One of my favorite bands, Mandolin Orange, released an album in 2010 entitled, Quiet Little Room.



Then about a couple of weeks ago Ken Yates released a new album, Quiet Talkers. It's like the universe was pushing, not just nudging, this idea of quietness. Something that isn't all that hard for me. In spite of the fact that I'm a podcaster who struggles with consistency.

Thoreau wrote, "The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation." I'd also been thumbing through an old book (circa 1988) - a paperback that I've had for years entitled, "Quiet Desperation: The Truth About Successful Men."

There are a number of books dealing with introverts which have a focus on the power of quiet.

The paradox is that I'm compelled to communicate. Until I'm not.

Then I'm even more compelled to be silent. And it can last quite a while.

I don't read the genre, but I jotted down a quote I ran into that I thought was quite clever. Science fiction writer, Philip K. Dick crafted a great line in a novel, Valis:

“When you are crazy you learn to keep quiet.”

Perhaps I'm becoming aware of my own craziness.

It's May. And we're still in this pandemic thing. Let's talk it out. Some more.

Join the private Facebook group. There'll be surprises in it for you! Click here.

Thanks,

It's a question. Not a statement.

Here in Texas, our "stay at home" order (issued by the governor) ends tomorrow, Thursday, April 30, 2020. Starting Friday, May 1st, stores can open up at 25% capacity. The exceptions are hair salons, bars and health clubs. If things continue to improve (some argue that they may not be improving), then the governor said he'll modify his executive order to elevate the capacities to 50% on May 18th. By then, he may have a plan for bars, hair salons, and health clubs to reopen, too. As with many things, time will tell.

It's the first sign and step toward emerging from this pandemic. Maybe.

Some are still quite anxious about it. Others are restless and ready to get back to the old normal.

Me? I'm pretty sure I'm not ready to enter some crowded space. Those who are cavalier, thinking this is much ado about nothing, will likely think I'm an idiot. And that's fine. I can live with it. I've been called worse.

Today, let's talk about music and other coping mechanisms of this pandemic.

Enjoy. Stay safe. And let's see if we can't figure out a way to create an even better normal than our past normal.

Here's the social media post I refer to in today's show. Laugh at will.

Randy

P.S. If you'd like to watch the video of this episode, plus tons of other fun stuff not available here at the website...join the private Facebook group. Just click here and answer a few quick questions.

It's been about 5 weeks since this whole stay-safe-at-home began. Today, it's a rambling-mess documenting my effort of continuing to cope with Covid. You can judge how well or how poorly I'm holding up.

Early on, I know many of us, including me, thought this might be much ado about nothing. But there are real people behind the fatality numbers. Here's just one example that happened more than 2 weeks ago...

I wish you all the best.

Love,

P.S. If you'd like to see a video of me recording today's episode, then join the private Facebook group. Click here!

Today's show is a video. I decided against live streaming 'cause I'm just not a live streaming guy. Okay, mostly I'm a chicken.

I'll give some words that distill today's episode:

Compassion

Understanding

Judgment

I'm coping with COVID by trying to better understand. I hope you and yours are safe, and well.

Links you may want to check out (mentioned in today's show):

Ed Sheeran's looper board demonstrated (you can find much more if you dig deeper)

Kevin Presley's sermon on Plagues And Punishment

Enjoy the show.

Happy Friday the 13th. No, I'm not superstitious.

The best definition I ever heard of overthinking is creating problems that are never there. Today let me encourage us to just do stuff while avoiding thinking of all the things that could go wrong.

Today it's about thinking what if it goes right. What if it goes well. 'Cause it could. It might. But we'll never know if we don't try.

Fear stops us, but today needs to be the day - a notable day 'cause it's a Friday the 13th - to give it a go and fail if we must. But we might succeed. Wildly. How will we know if we don't try?

And if we fail we'll laugh it off. Get back up and either do it again because one failure doesn't mean we were doing it wrong...or we'll adjust and it slightly different. The good news is we get to decide what we'll do. But the urgent thing is that we do something! And that we keep doing it.

“When I look back on all these worries, I remember the story of the old man who said on his deathbed that he had had a lot of trouble in his life, most of which had never happened.”

– Winston Churchill

Stop worrying about it. Stop thinking it may not work. Stop thinking that everybody is watching. You know that's untrue. I certainly know it's true. Unless you've got millions of followers on social media you know nobody is paying attention to your life. That's a blessing. We can try stuff without any fear of failure or embarrassment - except in our head. So today get out of your head.

“In a moment of decision, the best thing you can do is the right thing to do, the next best thing is the wrong thing, and the worst thing you can do is nothing.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

Today it's about being in the sunlight of optimism. And it's about working harder to battle our fears and pessimism thinking it won't work. Starting today and all through the weekend let's try an experiment. Let's put in the work - let's do the things we most want to try to do - and let's assume it'll work out. Let's assume success. Yes, failure is always possible, but success is, too. Let's bet on success!

What if for the next 3 days we refuse to be pessimistic about what we're doing and we embrace optimism choosing rather to believe that our work - our efforts - will pay off.

Do something. Do the one thing you've refused to do up to now because you were afraid. Stop being so afraid you don't do anything. Be afraid, but do it anyway.

Pick the one thing that you know is in your way. The one action you're not taking that you know may make the big difference. Do that thing. Believe it will work out to your favor.

“Optimism is the faith that leads to achievement. Nothing can be done without hope and confidence.”

– Helen Keller

Go do it. If you want my help, shoot me a message using that contact page. Let me know what you're going to do. Let me know you did it. Then let me know how it turned out. I promise I'll reply and give you encouragement to keep moving forward.

Randy

“If you judge a fish by its ability to climb a tree, it will think it’s stupid.”  - Albert Einstein

Let's personalize it. If YOU judge yourself by your inability to do something, you'll think you're stupid.

There are many things you're not. Many thing you cannot do.

That doesn't mean you're a failure or stupid. It merely means those aren't likely the things you should pursue. Those aren't your element, that place Sir Ken Robinson describes as where your natural aptitude intersects with what you love. So you'd best devote more time to finding your element than lamenting what isn't.

You know what's possible for everybody? The things within the reach of every single one of us?

Goodness. Morality. Righteousness. Holiness. Love. Forgiveness. Humility. Loyalty. Friendship. Courage. Vigor. Zeal. Enthusiasm. Resolve. Persistence. Trustworthiness. Sanctification. Salvation.

Add whatever words you'd like to that list. You get the idea.

Nothing prevents any of us from accomplishing ALL of these things. Lasting things. Things we can instill into our families, our children, and our friends by our good influence.

We can be so much more.

We can do so much more.

We can if only we will.

What's stopping you?

Is it the pursuit of lesser things? Like money? Or fun? Or self-indulgence?

Should we give up these lasting pursuits for entertainment, or luxury, or ease?

Self-talk is important. Be careful how you talk with yourself. But be even more careful to see yourself for what you truly are.

Invest more time in those areas where you can become a better person. Where you can make a bigger difference to others.

Be wise. Be helpful.

Randy

P.S. Want to join us inside Facebook? Click here.

How are those New Year's resolutions working out for you? Have you given up on them yet? The odds are you've already quit. And if you haven't, you will. Almost everybody does. Sad, huh?

Maybe. Maybe not.

There's good news and bad news. Let's start with the bad news. You won't do anything you don't want to do. Well, actually that can be good news if you think about it in more positive ways than most people do. Because...it means you can do what you want to do. It doesn't mean you can do it well. You may not have the talent to pull it off. But you can still give it a go. The thought of an unprofitable outcome might help you change your mind and decide to give up on it. Like me playing the guitar for the past 40 plus years. Mostly I've been in love with the idea of being able to play. I've been far less in love with actually putting in the work. So it's pretty clear I made up my mind. Learning to play the guitar has never been important enough to me - important enough that I wanted to put in the work to learn.

Freedom. We all have it.

Our freedom may be impacted by our circumstances, but only to the degree we allow it. We convince ourselves of things. Real and imagined things. You know the circumstance that has always ruined my desire to learn the guitar? Not being able to play anything well for a long time. I'm not foiled by the knowledge that I'll never play music for money, or be recognized as a great guitarist. Those were never goals or dreams. The new times I've sat down to try to begin learning, the task seemed so daunting that I convinced myself it'll be years before you can play anything enjoyable. I've never been able to mentally or emotionally move past the truth that I just don't enjoy the process. And even though not all processes are enjoyable, we pursue the processes that take us toward something we really want. Seems my truth is, I really don't want to learn the guitar. Else, I'd be learning. My truth? I really enjoy listening to and watching great guitarists play music. That's where I get pleasure. The result? I listen to a lot of music. I love it and I willingly invest the time to listen to a lot of music every single day. I can easily prioritize my music listening in lieu of other activities like watching TV or reading a novel or any other thing.

The good news is you can do what you want to do. The hard part may be figuring that out.

The other bad news is that you can't decide or choose for anybody except yourself. Deciding for yourself is challenging enough, but sadly we frequently spend more time hoping to change somebody else. Meanwhile, our own growth and improvement go unattended. We're busy trying to drive somebody else's car. Growing increasingly frustrated when it doesn't work. They don't do what we want. All the while, losing more and more of ourselves. Sometimes our life goes into the ditch because we're not taking the wheel of our own life. Maybe it's time to change that.

So now what you gonna do?

It happened. Something you never saw coming. Something you knew was coming. Something bad. Maybe horrible.

Life knocked you down and dragged you out back, beating you until you were so hurt you couldn't get back to your feet. Not right away.

I don't know what it is that attacked you. It could be one of a million things. Sickness. Death. Broken relationships. Money (or lack thereof). Job. Faith.

There is no area of our life immune from a crisis. 

Before you can dive too deeply into answering today's question there's another - even more personal question to answer.

Who are you gonna do it for?

I hope there is somebody.

Think about them. Right now. Keep thinking about them. Embrace whatever feelings sweep over you. Spend a lot of time pondering the person - or the people....