letters from a weirdo

I’m a community college prof who got run out of my home by Christo-fascists, and I’m actively being run out of my job for standing up for democracy. To wit, a Koch-funded news rag put out a hit piece on me, manipulating SEO like a heat-seeking missile to make sure that story stays at the top of every search of my name—all but guaranteeing I never find work again (in spite of the numerous national awards for my teaching, research, community service, and impressive roster of references). I understand exactly how fascist institutions work together to destroy those willing to speak up for democratic values.

Unlike the scaredy-pants military leadership discussed in Kristofer Goldsmith’s recent video, I don’t have combat training or even a group of veteran peers to protect my physical safety, nor do I have the cultural reputational advantage of being a respected veteran. No one thanks me “for my service.” Instead, I get hate mail. I get scapegoated. I get run out of my home— a whole life: gone.

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I don’t have a Purple Heart. I don’t have a uniform that displays bars and medals on my jacket. Nope. I’m just a random middle-aged, trans community college teacher, with no money, no muscle, and no larger community coming to my defense. When I chose to speak up, I knew I was outnumbered and that I’d likely get clobbered. I still stood up for my students, for public education, for the First Amendment, and for the promise of a more perfect union.

Personal values mean nothing unless you stand up for them, even when it costs you. How do decorated brass not know that? How do current and former military leaders forget that fear is the mind-killer and bigotry the harbinger of fascism?

Yes, it hurts. Yes, it’s terrifying. Yes, I lost everything. Yes, I am living out of two suitcases and don’t know how to rebuild my life. But I still believe my students and our democracy were worth my sacrifice. And I’d do it again.

Dear military leaders: I do not care if you’re “scared” of sanctions from a petty tyrant and his wife-beating alcoholic Secretary of Defense. Speak. Up. Anyhow.

On a personal note, as a child and grandchild of veterans, it’s a sad day indeed when community college teachers show more bravery than decorated military leadership. I said what I said. I refuse to apologize for it. Think of this as moral boot camp.

If you sacrifice our collective liberty in favor of conditional security, based on your silence, that’s not patriotism: that’s complicity.

I’m sick to death of this myth that soldiers are somehow braver and more patriotic than civilians. I’m angry at you for following illegal orders. I’m angry at a group of older white men in the military, with reputational advantage most people couldn’t fathom, who act like babies and stay silent during the rise of fascism.

All for retirement.

All to keep your rank.

All for fear of getting pushed out of a career.

That kind of cowering is unpatriotic. It’s un-American. And it’s weak as f**k for a bunch of guys who act like they’re “tough” because they know how to kill people and blow s**t up, most of which is leveraged not to protect freedom or “advance democracy” but to prop up oil and tech oligarchs’ business interests.

Same as it ever was.

Your learned capacity for violence is not strength, nor is it patriotic. It never has been. What makes a patriotic person is their integrity— and a conscious choice to adhere to long-term communal values over short-term personal struggles.

So no. I do not care whether a high ranking member of the military is “scared” of punishment. Miss me with that cowardice.

Who gives a s**t if your personal life may temporarily be upended when the alternative is decades of fascism? Does following the chain of command rot people’s moral compass? I’m not just “asking for a friend”— I’m asking for my nation. For the love of democracy, y’all, “the worst thing” in military culture isn’t standing up to authority and facing “consequences.” It’s following illegal orders, refusing to speak out, and allowing your country to collapse into fascism so you can keep your rank and retirement.

Standing up against fascism is hard.

Living under decades of consolidated fascist rule is harder.

Choose your hard.

“if you give a fascist a cookie” — by flightlessblrbs

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This news cycle will be designed to pull you into panic. I refuse to participate. Instead, I invite you to join me in taking part in A People’s Filibuster— which refuses to focus on authoritarian chaos and, instead, highlights the agency everyday people have to change their circumstances.

Join the People’s Filibuster

You can take part in A People’s Filibuster, whenever you find this blog by doing the following four things:

* Download Peter Ackerman’s The Checklist to End Tyranny, which is free on the International Center for Nonviolent Conflict’s website.

* Read it, chapter by chapter, on your podcast, YouTube Channel, or Substack live.

* Encourage others to take part. The idea is to flood the zone with news we can use— like an emergency broadcast that invites agency over despair.

* Email The Checklist to End Tyranny to all of your friends and neighbors. Start a bookclub. Take notes on how you can get involved in your community.

See you soon for Part 2 of A People’s Filibuster. Join me!

I saw the following note from Alyssa Milano, where she writes [image below]:

S**t, you guys. I’m so tired of just going about my life like this isn’t all nuts. NONE OF THIS IS NORMAL. I AM SO TIRED.

Squirrel, me too. Me too. I think a lot of us are feeling similar sentiments.

But there’s good news: We don’t have to just go about life like this isn’t all nuts. This is nuts. But there’s also something every single one of us can do to topple a budding dictatorship.

We can build hyper-local parallel systems of support.

This is crucial work, because it prevents fascists from being able to control the population. Fascists destroy food systems, economic systems, housing, healthcare, arts, access to basic safety because they need us in panic to remain in control. The chaos they create isn’t about incompetence: it’s about keeping you frozen and in trauma. Domestic abusers do this, too. (Survivors know.)

But we don’t have to cede ground to fascists. When we build parallel systems of support, at the neighborhood level, we deny fascists the disordered panic they need to stay in control. The cool part, though, is that parallel systems of support actually disintegrate power right from under the fascists; it crumbles the pillars of support they need to prop them up. It helps elected officials, military, institutions, and law enforcement to find their spines and re-calibrate their moral compasses.

This video explains why parallel systems of support aren’t just practical but actually the cornerstone of kicking fascists to the curb. Watch it. Share it. And, if your neighborhood needs encouragement to get started, give this weirdo a call.