Ep.13 Many people assume they're not "the right fit" to foster or adopt because of their life experiences. Whether you've overcome addiction, navigated ADHD, lived with a disability, immigrated to a new country or built a non-traditional family, you may be surprised to learn that your story isn't automatically a barrier to gain your license in New York State.

And if you've faced discrimination in the past, maybe it's time to try a new agency.

Families Thrive employees Rachel Doig and Michelle Hinds host this engaging discussion about overcoming biases, the significance of supportive agencies, and the unique challenges and triumphs faced by LGBTQ parents in the adoption and foster care community.

The key isn't finding "perfect" parents—it's finding the right families and pairing them with the right children through an agency that sees the whole person.

If you've ever wondered whether your past or life choices would prevent you from fostering or adopting, this conversation may completely change the way you see yourself and the difference you could make in a child's life.

Hosts:

Rachel Doig is a marketing assistant at Families Thrive and is personally connected to the LGBTQ community. While she currently does not have children, her work and personal journey have deepened her involvement in fostering and adoption support for all families.

Michelle Hinds is the senior home finder and trainer at Families Thrive, focusing on guiding prospective foster and adoptive parents through the initial inquiry to becoming a licensed family.

Melissa and Lidia Kubicar Kunz are longtime foster parents with Families Thrive. Transitioning from another agency, they bring a wealth of personal experience, having previously navigated the adoption process. They are passionate advocates for inclusive foster care practices.

Carlos Karan Almeida and Andrew Gilchrist are a couple participating in the Families Thrive adoption program. Both experienced bias when attempting to foster through other agencies, which drove them to Families Thrive, where they found a welcoming and supportive atmosphere.

Carlos holds a deep desire to foster and adopt due to his own experiences with coming out, and Andrew, whose background includes adoption of a child, brings valuable insights into building a family network.

 🌐FamiliesThriveinc.org

📞 Call 585-232-5110

Chapters:

00:00:00 Breaking the Bias Against LGBTQ Foster Parents

00:01:15 Meet Families Turning Adversity Into Strength

00:02:14 How the Foster & Adoption Journey Begins

00:05:00 Why Training Builds Trauma-Informed Parents

00:07:10 Finding an Agency That Sees Your Potential

00:12:02 Why They Chose to Foster & Adopt

00:15:49 Building a Family as an LGBTQ Couple

00:18:18 When Life Experience Is Mistaken for a Liability

00:24:39 Immigration, ADHD & Other Hidden Barriers

00:31:02 Myths About LGBTQ Foster & Adoptive Parents

00:37:10 What Children Really Need Is Family

00:39:38 Acceptance Over Assumptions

00:43:48 How Lived Experience Helps Children Heal

00:46:56 Matching the Right Child With the Right Family

00:49:18 Your Past Doesn't Disqualify You

00:50:03 Hope, Healing & Pride

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Ep.12 While thousands of children wait for safe, loving families, too many qualified same-sex parents are discouraged and kids are overlooked by outdated foster and adoptions agency bias.

This episode highlights the work of Families Thrive, a New York based agency committed to supporting all families through the foster care and adoption journey.

Whether you're considering fostering, adopting, or simply want to be a better ally, this conversation offers valuable insight, compassion, and practical resources.

Resources Mentioned:
• Families Thrive | 585-232-5110
• Trillium Health
• MOCHA Center Rochester
• NAMI Rochester

Because every child deserves a safe, loving home—and every family deserves the opportunity to provide one.

Chapters:

00:00 Inclusivity in Foster Care

05:17 Supporting LGBTQ Youth

10:56 Embracing Identity and Acceptance in Foster Care

12:57 Acceptance and Education

20:05 Ensuring Safe Spaces and Genuine Inclusivity

21:21 Challenges and Successes in Same-Sex Adoption and Fostering

31:33 LGBTQ Resources in Rochester

34:05 Supporting LGBTQ Families in Foster Care and Adoption

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Unsure about your rights, your voice, or what comes next in the family court process?

Ep. 11 Licensed to Love Nicole Bayly, Esq. a foster and adoptive parent with over 20 years of experience in Monroe County breaks down what really happens inside family court.

From understanding why children are removed from their homes to what permanency hearings actually mean for your role as a foster parent, Nicole brings both legal clarity and lived experience to the conversation.

Key Takeaways:

⚖️ What “Imminent Risk” Really Means
A child can only be removed when there is clear evidence of immediate danger—this legal threshold is higher than many realize.

🧭 Know the Court Milestones
Permanency hearings and Termination of Parental Rights (TPR) decisions shape the long-term outcome for every child in care.

🤝 Your Voice Matters in Court
As a foster parent, you have the right to participate and advocate for the child’s best interest throughout the legal process.

💔 Balancing Heart & Reality
Fostering comes with emotional complexity—supporting reunification while forming your own bond.

🏡 Permanency is the Priority
The system is designed to secure safe, stable homes for children—whether that means reunification or adoption.

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Ep. 10 pulls back the curtain on the real work of foster care—reunification, healing, and breaking generational cycles. Foster parents Tiffany and Louis Rivera share what it really feels like to love children as your own… and still help them return home.

From building relationships with birth parents to managing the emotional toll of goodbye, the Riveras offer a perspective most people don’t talk about—but every foster parent needs to hear.

💔 What do you do when a child you love calls for you as you drive away?

✨ Key Takeaways:

🌐Families Thrive  FamiliesThriveinc.org

📞 Contact Families Thrive: 585-232-5110

Chapters:

00:00:00 Why Letting Go Is the Hardest Part of Foster Care

00:01:00 The Real Goal: Reunification, Not Adoption

00:02:00 Building Trust with Birth Parents from Day One

00:04:00 Staying Connected Even After Children Go Home

00:05:00 Supporting Families Through Different Parenting Styles

00:06:30 Why Kids Need Two Families to Love Them

00:08:00 The Emotional Reality of Saying Goodbye

00:10:30 When Kids Don’t Understand Why They’re Leaving

00:12:30 Creating a Safe Space for Kids to Want Their Parents

00:14:30 Most Kids Want to Go Back Home

00:16:30 When You Lose Contact After Reunification

00:18:00 Preparing Kids for Transition (When You Can)

00:20:00 Helping Your Own Children Process Foster Care

00:22:00 Balancing a Household with Foster & Biological Kids

00:24:00 Setting Boundaries with Difficult Birth Parents

00:26:30 Foster Care Requires an Open Heart

00:28:00 Why More Foster Parents Are Needed

00:30:00 Finding Joy in the Smallest Moments

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Ep. 9 Unconditional love as a foster parent means showing up again and again… even after the child leaves your home. It looks like answering late-night calls, sending groceries across state lines, and reminding a child—no matter where life takes them—that they still have a family.

In this episode of Licensed to Love, you’ll hear the story of a foster-adoptive mom whose commitment didn’t end when the kids turned 18. For her, forever truly means forever.

Toni Marrocco-Helwig shares what it really means to provide a safe home and unconditional love to children in foster care—especially those with special needs who often wait the longest for families. For 15 years, Toni and her husband Mike have welcomed more than 50 children into their home, offering stability, patience, and lifelong support.

Foster parents can play a powerful role in supporting birth families.

Building trust takes time. Showing up consistently is more powerful than words.

Loving children with special needs or trauma backgrounds requires patience, flexibility, and a willingness to meet them where they are.

Key Takeaways
🔗 Learn more about fostering and support services at

🌐 FamiliesThriveinc.org

📞 Contact Families Thrive: 585-232-5110

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“Kids know when they are loved and when they are chosen.”

Ep. 8 Veronica Black sits down with Trelawney McCoy, a foster and adoptive parent whose life is a living example of what it means to stand in the gap for children who need stability most.

Trelawney has fostered more than 30 children and adopted 11, all while working full-time, mentoring young women, and leading a youth football program with the Rochester Rams.

Her story isn’t about doing it all—it’s about doing what matters most. This conversation goes beyond inspiration and into the real work of foster care:

Whether you’re curious about fostering, already in the system, or simply want to understand how love becomes action, this episode is a reminder that futures are shaped by the adults willing to stand in the gap.

🔗 Learn more about fostering and support services at 🌐https://familiesthriveinc.org/ 

📞 Contact Families Thrive: 585-232-5110

Chapters:

00:00 From Foster Care to Forever Family

03:31 Single Mom Raising 30+ Foster Children

08:08 — Kids Know When They’re Chosen

13:59 Advocating for Special Needs Children

16:23 Faith and Resilience in Foster Care

20:38 Supporting Biological Family Connections

27:04 Healing Trauma Through Community Support

30:37 Self-Care for Foster Parents

31:48 Building a Village for Future Generations

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Ep. 7 “Usually when I made a mistake, I would just get moved to another house. But here, you actually showed that you cared about me.” - Joubert Black, 19

I was in foster care. I moved through seven different placements. Every time I messed up, I learned to expect the same outcome: pack up, move on, start over.

On this episode of License to Love, I sit down with my mom, Veronica Black, to share what it was really like growing up in the New York State foster care system—and what changed when I finally landed in a home where mistakes didn’t mean abandonment.

✨ In this episode, you’ll hear:

What it’s really like to move through multiple foster homes

Why building trust with older youth takes patience—not perfection

The harm of judging children by their “file” instead of their humanity

Why older youth in foster care deserve families just as much as anyone else

How love, consistency, and empathy can change a life’s trajectory

This episode is a must-listen for foster parents, adoptive families, advocates, and anyone who believes children deserve more than a system—they deserve a home.

📞 Contact Families Thrive: 585-232-5110

0:01 A Child’s View of Foster Care

1:36 Why Stability Matters More Than Placement

4:07 From Foster Care to Adoption: Joubert’s Story

13:15 Why Older Kids Deserve Adoption Too

16:24 Parenting Through Trauma in Foster Care

21:39 Searching for Belonging in the System

26:11 Rebuilding Family Ties Through Supervised Visits

29:11 Adoption, Birth Families, and Identity

32:33 Building Forever Families, One Child at a Time

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Ep. 6 Opening your heart to foster a child is an act of love—but staying open when it hurts takes courage.

This week on Licensed to Love, host Veronica welcomes Michelle Hinds back to the podcast for a deeply honest conversation about what it really means to become a foster family—and how that journey ultimately led her and her husband to adoption in New York State.

As a dedicated home finder with Families Thrive and a foster/adoptive parent herself, Michelle brings a rare dual perspective. She shares what first drew her to fostering, the emotional reality of loving children who may not stay forever, and how understanding trauma, boundaries, and healthy attachment shapes everything. This episode is both tender and practical—offering reassurance to those considering fostering and affirmation to those already walking the path.

If you’ve ever wondered whether you’re strong enough to love children through uncertainty, this conversation will meet you right where you are.

🔗 Learn more about fostering and support services at 🌐 ⁠FamiliesThrive.org ⁠ 📞 Contact Families Thrive: 585-232-5110

Fostering is centered on meeting children’s immediate needs and can sometimes lead to unexpected adoption journeys

Saying goodbye is one of the hardest parts of fostering—and caring for yourself is essential

Every child expresses love differently, especially when trauma is involved

Stability, structure, and patience can be life-changing for foster youth

Supporting children doesn’t end at adulthood—long-term guidance matters

“It’s our job to show them what healthy love is, right? With boundaries, expectations, and structure.” – Michelle

“I had to look at her as her own person… and how she was going to show affection.” – Michelle

“Take a chance on these kids… Teach them what it’s like to be in a family.” – Michelle

🎧 Listen now and learn what it truly means to love with intention—even when the outcome isn’t guaranteed.

Chapters:

0:00 Why We Chose Foster Care (And What We Didn’t Expect)
3:24 The Emotional Reality of Foster Placements
11:56 Loving Kids You Might Have to Let Go
22:46 When Fostering Turns Into Adoption
27:02 Parenting Foster & Adopted Teens Is Different
34:38 Choosing Commitment When It Gets Hard
37:17 Learning How a Foster Child Shows Love
42:31 The First Time She Called Me “Mom”
44:26 Building Trust Inside a New Family
48:34 Love, Loss, and Growth After Adoption

Key Takeaways:Notable Quotes:

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Ep. 5 What does foster care really look like behind closed doors—especially when teens are involved?

In this powerful episode of Licensed to Love, Families Thrive’s Director of Program Services, Veronica Black-Turner sits down with seasoned foster parent Jeronda James for an honest, compassionate conversation about the realities of fostering in New York State.

Jeronda shares her lived experience opening her home to foster youth, navigating challenges with patience, advocacy, and heart—particularly when supporting teenagers who urgently need safe, loving homes. From managing daily routines and school placements to allowing emotional space for healing, this episode sheds light on what it truly takes to show up for children in care.

You’ll hear how ongoing support from Families Thrive makes a difference, why advocacy is non-negotiable, and how fostering—while challenging—can be deeply rewarding. Whether you’re considering foster care, currently fostering, or simply want to better understand the system, this episode offers clarity, encouragement, and truth.

✨ In this episode, you’ll learn:

How patience and flexibility shape successful placements

The critical role foster parents play as advocates

How Families Thrive supports foster parents every step of the way

Why following your heart matters when considering fostering

🔗 Learn more about fostering and support services at

0:00 Jeronda James' Journey Into Foster Parenting With Families Thrive

5:50 Preparing for Foster Care as a Single Parent

7:47 School and Healthcare Placements

9:46 Creating a Welcoming Environment

16:35 Importance of Space and Listening

20:11 Challenges of Foster Parenting

30:35 Flexible Parenting Strategies for Traumatized Children

35:19 Fostering Love and Overcoming Challenges in Family Dynamics

42:00 Fostering Hope for Teens in the Foster Care System

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Ep. 4 This week on Licensed to Love, we’re breaking down the heart of the initial fostering process: the training, preparation, and ongoing support that Families Thrive gives every family who says “yes.” 💛

Director of Program Services Veronica Black sits down with Michelle Hinds, a seasoned home finder and trainer, to walk you through the 10-week trauma-informed course that equips families to understand the emotional and developmental needs of children in care. From navigating trauma to building confidence as a caregiver, this training is designed to prepare you for the real-life moments you’ll face — not just the paperwork.

You’ll also get an inside look at the support that continues after licensing:

Chapters:

0:00 Introduction

3:44 Training Foster Parents to Handle Trauma-Experienced Children

6:01 Background Checks and Support Systems

11:16 Flexible Foster Parent Training and Support Initiatives

15:49 The Joys and Challenges of Fostering Children

19:32 Supporting Foster Families Through Personal Experience

#LicensedToLove #FamiliesThrive #FosterCareTraining #AdoptionSupport #FosterParentJourney #TraumaInformedCare #InHomeSupport #NYFosterCare #FamilyServices

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