Life, Death & The Space Between with Dr. Amy Robbins podcast

March 16, 2023 LOVE Is All You Need with Humble The Poet

EP. 301: HUMBLE THE POET - LOVE IS ALL YOU NEED

“Love is the breeze and the work is opening the sail moreso than it is to find that breeze.” – Humble The Poet

“What is loving yourself? it’s literally treating yourself the way you treat people you love.” – Humble The Poet

“Self pity in itself is the fast food version of self love.” – Humble The Poet

“Loneliness isn’t a circumstance, loneliness is a feeling. loneliness isn’t being alone, it’s not enjoying being alone.” – Humble The Poet

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EPISODE SUMMARY:

What is love? What does it take to love?

Today we talk with Humble the Poet, a Canadian-born rapper, spoken-word artist, poet, internationally bestselling author, and former elementary school teacher.

His efforts to impress girls with spoken-word in coffee shops have transformed into a creative adventure spanning over 10 years and transforming into something completely different. He now uses his platforms to share art and teach others “How to be Love(d)."

Listen in to hear what truly blocks us from love, how to be in relationship with yourself, and how every relationship in your life mirrors that one.

Topics We Discuss:

[3:07] We have to be love to be loved. Love can’t be given or received if we are blocked. A failed relationship opened Humble up to this.

[5:28] Love is within us. Affection, sex, attention, power, etc aren’t love and can’t fill that void. We can’t find love, we can only realize the love that is there. You have to let go of your insecurities, old habits, beliefs, etc to realize it. This can only start within. Self-love is treating ourselves the way we treat people we love.

[7:41] We often feel undeserving of love because we know our imperfections and insecurities. Even the people we love have these though. There are no qualifications for love. Having the car, the clothes, the money, etc won’t bring you more love. External validation can’t solve an internal problem.

[9:51] The way we treat others is always a reflection of how we treat ourselves. Vulnerability is the first step to building a relationship with anyone. This doesn’t mean sharing your deepest, darkest secrets on the first date. Journaling and therapy can help. Self-awareness is the key.

[13:17] You are not your thoughts or emotions. All of us to various degrees are floating through life unconsciously. The only way to stop is by becoming self-aware. Journaling has to be done unfiltered. Prayer is another way to be intentional and authentic with yourself and God about what you really want out of life. Happiness is an expression of gratitude.

[18:29] You have to figure out what matters to you in relationships. Being loved vs liked. If we’re worried about being liked, we are sabotaging ourselves from experiencing real love.

[20:52] Movement is medicine. All relationships have a level of physical intimacy. Dancing, hugging ourselves, staring at yourself naked in the mirror. Connecting with vs criticizing our bodies sets the bar for our relationship with ourselves. Social media perpetuates unhealthy views of ourselves.

[24:14] ‘We are flawed people raised by flawed people.’ Flawed doesn’t equal unlovable. Childhood traumas can shape our decisions, but we have an obligation to own our baggage. Healing can be found in reparenting your inner child.

[30:47] Our unconscious patterns stay with us until we correct them in adulthood. We can’t feel sorry for ourselves when we consciously act them out. Humble was taught that vulnerability is weakness.

[33:28] Social media has many of us seeking external validation. It’s designed to keep us hooked in. The biggest cages we live in are internal. The journey to self-awareness is limiting in itself. Progress is the goal.

[36:55] Humble’s experience with DMT. His personal definition of meditation - sit and do nothing. Loneliness is a circumstance, not a feeling. Lack of vulnerability can make us feel lonely in our relationships.

[40:59] Love as a verb vs love as a noun. We often look for reciprocity in romantic love unlike other relationships. Focusing on love as service allows us to give love to anyone. Divorce is a byproduct of wanting someone else to love us more than we love ourselves. TV and media almost never depict happy healthy marriages. Marriage is an industry.