Life Workshop

Presentation is where someone can get fooled by marketers or presenters.Once we think independently and practical, presentation won't matter as much.Q: How much do you value the presentation vs the real thing?

What do you value? saving money or spending it, do you wanna look scary or friendly, what is more important function or fashion, Do you prefer to be famous or helpful, Do you value approval or being challenged? 

Small changes that we make in our value system now, may not look like that much to begin with, can have exponential effect in the long run.

Q: What do you value? saving money or spending it, do you wanna look scary or friendly, what is more important function or fashion, Do you prefer to be famous or helpful, Do you value approval or being challenged?

Although the saying, "if it's not broken, why should you fix it?" can be correct often, reviewing it is not such a bad thing. 
Often we are OK with the poor results of our habits but question the better results of a change.

Q: What do you value more, healthy food or tasty food? Do you think healthy food is expensive? Do you exercise to be healthy or other reasons? Do you want something unique or popular? Do you take pride in buying cheap or expensive stuff?

In order to have a good life we should have our values in the right order. 

For me the most important thing is to be happy and have a good life in general. The chain that makes a happy life has different links to it, e.g. health, money, circle of friends, helping others, fame, power, daylight, satisfying job and so on. At different times of my life different links have been the weakest where I put my attention. By re evaluating my life, re-examining which links are the weakest at the time and focus on it till it has improved to my satisfaction. After all a chain is as strong as its weakest link.

Q: What are your priorities in life, Wealth, health, happiness, family, fame, power ....... and in what order?

One becomes famous because they are liked by the public, its not always because they are correct, smart, helpful, reasonable and so on. This is why I say you can judge the value system of a society by seeing who is on top.

A country becomes democratic, dictatorship, good or bad and so on because of the people not the government, after all the government is selected or stays in power because of the people. 

Most of us wish for a peaceful, happy, rich and healthy life for ourselves and others. We generally fail because we have the wrong value systems and are not aware of the consequences. 
    
Q: Among your friends, Who do you like more, the ones who agree with you or the ones who challenge you in a proper way?

People have different standards, let them decide what they need help with and how. After all, try to help people the way they want to be helped not the way you want to help. 

Often is better to take other's request/comments at face value, not base on the previous experiences, otherwise its like eating in a dish that hasn't been cleaned up, you get the previous food flavor in the new one. yuck!

Any change should be discussed and hopefully agreed upon by all parties, even if the change is for the better. 3 way communication is key. Repeat what you have been asked to do and wait for a yes/confirmed answer. 

Do you ask what and how you can help or simply help.
Do you ask for help for clean up and why?

We teach our children stranger danger,  Bad idea. Strangers are only strangers until you get to know them.

When we say we like someone, it does not equate to us trusting them, and vice versa disliking someone does not equate to not trusting them. People being trustworthy or not does not rely on liking them or not.

You can change your feelings and get to like someone e.g. by getting to know them but you can't make them trustworthy or good, if they are not.

As a general rule, feelings change, facts don't.

We don't often have bad people, people have bad ideas, which for the most part is fixable by education.

We often look for similarities and are scared of the difference. Although the unknown can be exciting and worth to get to know.

Be careful what you look for, good or bad, you will find it, you will never get disappointed.

When searching for differences or similarities in each other, it never stops. First you will find the more obvious ones, then you will find the less obvious ones.

We should stop saying "those people", and say "some of us".

When we say "us", we want to help and cooperate but when we say "those people" it brings a sense of hostility and fight.

We are on a small planet, but at times we behave like ants that fight over a small piece of bread crumb, when there is lot left for everyone.

We have differences, we have good and bad people, thieves and trustworthy, different cultures and religions and looks and more differences BUT we are living on one small planet. It is just "us".
 
Q: How do you feel when you say "us" vs " you people or my people"

You can get some attention/look when you look different than the norm in the society. And that will be fixed as people get used to it by seeing more of it

Don't trust the first impression, 
Don't trust your intuition, be objective

Solution to lessen discrimination:
1. Be curious, not judgemental
2. Stranger is not danger, stranger is just a stranger, TILL you get to know them. Studies show when you get to know someone, there are 93% chances you get to like them
Most abuse is happening among the people we know not from the strangers Since we give them a trust that they don't deserve
Unknown is not scary, Unknown is another subject worth discovering, and can make life interesting and exciting
3. Remember it is just us on this planet

Remember the way you think dictates the way you feel.

Q: Which part do you need to improve on and what change are you making?
Q: Do you have friends of different backgrounds, see, sensuality, tattoo, religion, culture, country?

It is important to know if it is discrimination, vetting, or that there has been no discrimination at all and instead it was our own perception that made this judgement. Sometimes we make wrong conclusions and try to fix a problem that doesn't exist. We then neglect to pay attention to the things that need it. This said, we can get discriminated against based on multiple reasons.

Discrimination is not selecting someone based on unrelated subjects to the vetting process. In order to avoid potentially discriminating against someone, I recommend visualizing a person whom you like exhibiting the same behaviors or having the same qualifications. Will you treat them the same?

Often we discriminate unintentionally, due to ignorance. Education is the key.