L.I.V.E. Life Inspired Views for Everyday

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My sisters Deb and Freda were both fluent in Spanish and had a deep appreciation for celebrating The Day of the Dead, always held on October 31. Growing up in the Christian church, I always knew the meaning of All Saints Day on November 1. These two days took on special meaning this year.

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I've been driving past a house that has slowly been disintegrating from abandonment. It holds stories that we can only imagine. But now it is gradually returning to the earth, which we will do one day as well. This gives me pause to place value. To think about the vibrant place it once was, loved, and full of life. A reminder for us to intentionally connect with, love, and value others now, in the present, with intentionality, unconditionally, and joyfully.

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Victor Borge was a Danish comedian and musician. One of the sketches that made him so popular was called "Phonetic Punctuation." In the sketch, he would read a passage from a book and make sound effects for the punctuation marks, such as periods, commas, and exclamation marks. My dad would imitate him to us as kids when we were young, and we would beg him to do it over and over. (You can find recordings on YouTube.) 

What if instead, we looked like the punctuation mark that fit our personality? I thought that might be fun to explore.

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What were your grandparents like when you were young? Did they seem old? If you are a grandparent now, do you feel like you acted or looked as "old" as your grandparents? It could be perception, but it's fun to think about. I've been studying a bit about trees and how they age. Sometimes they are mistaken for being worthless to the forest, but in any shape or form, they give value to the environment. If you are old, think of what value you continue to give to those around you. If you are young, look at the elders in your world and discover what they continue to give...and then how you can be like them when you are old

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When I think of the mistakes I have made in my life, some of them make me cringe. Thinking of things that I have said without knowing how they might affect another person are painful memories. Using those painful memories and instances to become more sensitive and thoughtful gives that pain purpose. I sometimes wonder why we learn the greatest lessons in life through painful mistakes. They become great lessons when we use them for growth instead of succumbing to defensiveness and blaming. When we make the decision to do better.

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The two people in my world who mentored me on entertaining were my mother and my dear, dear friend, Pøtt Van Auken. As a pastor's wife from the 1950's-1990's, my mom often hosted open houses for the congregations to come to the parsonage. She also entertained many small groups and visiting speakers or international visitors. She taught me so much about preparing, being a host, and always warmly welcoming all who entered our home. 

Pøtt Van Auken grew up in Norway. She was an elegant entertainer. She garnished the delicious food she prepared so that you would think it was catered by a chef extraordinaire. She knew how to set the table, so it was beautiful as well as memorable. And she would sit people at the table in different conglomerations so there were always interesting conversations. At the parties she and her husband, Mike held, we were encouraged to bring some sort of "entertainment," be it a poem, a song, a story, whatever might be interesting to present during the meal. It allowed everyone to be seen and heard. She was a master at entertaining.

Entertaining people in our homes doesn't have to be fancy and spectacular...it just has to be welcoming.

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The book, What Do You Do with a Problem? by Kobi Yamada is an excellent narrative on tackling a problem as well as looking at problems with a new perspective. The story describes a little boy who discovers he has a problem. He doesn't know what to do with it. He finds that the more he worries about it the bigger it gets until, even though very afraid, he realizes that he has to tackle the problem. What happens then is that he finds that the problem wasn't what he thought it was. In fact, there was something beautiful about it because inside it he found an opportunity to learn and grow. To be brave. To do something. It could even be an opportunity for something good. 

Problems are a part of life. Our response is the ingredient to know if it makes our life better or worse.

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There's an old Yiddish folk tale about a man named Jacob who lived in a small farmhouse with his wife, children, and mother-in-law. It often became terribly loud and chaotic. Jacob couldn't stand it anymore and went to the rabbi in the village for advice. The rabbi listened and asked Jacob, "Do you have any chickens and ducks?" Jacob replied, "Yes." The rabbi instructed him to bring them to live in the house. Not wanting to disagree with the rabbi, Jacob returned home and brought the chickens and ducks into the house. Now the noise and commotion were worse than ever, not to mention the chicken droppings all over the floor. Jacob went back to the rabbi and complained again. This time the rabbi told him to bring his cows and goats to live in the house, too. Flustered, Jacob returned to his home and added the cows and goats. Now his house was a roar of sound and chaos. He ran back to the rabbi and implored him to help. He said, "I cannot go back or I will lose my mind." The rabbi calmly told him to put the animals back in their pens. Jacob did as the rabbi said. When all the animals were out of the house, he went back in to find the most peaceful house that he could remember. Jacob learned that when he stepped back and saw a different way of living, what he thought was so bad, wasn't actually bad at all. He changed his perspective.

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When I was in high school, I worked at a pizza place called Ted's Pizza Palace in Menomonie, Wisconsin. The owner, Ted Hasapes, was from Greece. He always had advice on how to live life for us teenagers who worked for him. It was my first job other than baling hay for a farmer during the summer. Though Ted and his wife Tasula trained me in how to be a waiter in their restaurant, the training I remembered most was the words of wisdom Ted tried to inspire in me. 

What training in your life do you remember most? If you have repeated it to someone else sometime along the way, it must be significant to you. Something to think about...

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Over the years, I have had a plethora of business or "calling cards." Several had just my business information. Some had my picture on it. The first one I had we made after I became a storyteller. It had a picture of a part of an arm with a hand coming from the sleeve because I always started my storytelling programs by pulling the stories from my sleeve. It was the way I made my storytelling style or identified me in a unique way. 

But we also have mental business or calling cards that we leave when we interact with others. What is on those "mental calling cards" are made by the reflection we leave with others. 

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