1. How Men Sense Openness vs. Guardedness: 
   • Men, especially conscious men, are attuned to whether a woman’s heart is open or closed. 
   • If they sense she’s withholding or impenetrable, it creates an internal response similar to being physically pushed away.
   1. 
      
2. The Impact of Vulnerability: 
   • When a woman allows herself to be vulnerable, she’s not projecting blame or frustration onto him. 
   • This openness is attractive because it doesn’t trigger his fears of “getting it wrong” or “not being enough,” which past experiences with closed-hearted partners may have left him sensitive to.
3. Guided Openness: 
   • Embrace an honest but gentle approach to sharing. 
   • You can express past challenges without overwhelming yourself or your partner by saying something like, “I’m feeling sensitive due to past experiences. I’m not ready to share everything, but here’s what I am open to sharing.”
4. Resisting Attachment to Past Wounds: 
   • Importance of being willing to release attachments to past pain rather than expecting a partner to change around those unhealed wounds. Pushing for him to adapt to unresolved pain can build resentment and distance.

1: Reflect on the Past Year 

• Importance of self-reflection in your love life.
• What patterns, beliefs, or actions have held you back in love?
• Reliance on dating apps: How has it made you feel? Have you been showing up in alignment with your true self?
• Write down what you want to release and let go of from the past year, including any negative experiences tied to app-based dating.
• Reframe past experiences as lessons to build your "new story."

2: Cultivate Feminine Energy and High Self-Worth 

• What feminine energy is and how it creates attraction and connection.
• Self-love and high self-worth are foundational to feminine energy.
• Practical ways to embody feminine energy: presence, receptivity, and self-care rituals that honor your worth.
• Step away from the apps and focus inward on becoming magnetic through their energy, not just their profile.

3: Set Clear Intentions for Love 

• The power of intentions vs. resolutions.
• Craft a "love intention" for the year (e.g., "I attract a partner who cherishes and values me" or "I deepen my self-love and trust in divine timing").
• Write this intention somewhere visible as a daily reminder.
• Align actions with these intentions, like spending more time on personal growth instead of endlessly swiping on apps.

4: Embody Your Dream Love Story

• "Act as if" you are already living your dream love story.
• Take aligned actions that match the love they want to attract (e.g., creating space in your life for a partner, treating themselves with the love you desire).
• Spend time doing things you love and building a life you adore, which naturally raises your vibration and draws in high-quality love.
• Journaling or affirmations to stay in alignment with your vision.

5: Trust the Process and Step Away from the Apps

• Common fears and doubts around love, especially the feeling that "it won’t happen" without dating apps.
• Surrender and trust divine timing.
• Stepping away from apps can create space for more authentic connections to arise naturally.
• Gratitude for what is yet to come and how it keeps you in a high vibrational state.

1. What are triggers? 
   • Sensitivity to specific behaviors: 
   • In Jungian psychology, a trigger is described and understood as an unconscious and unresolved part of the psyche. 
   • Unintegrated aspects of the self, or “shadows.” These are parts of our personality that have been repressed, made wrong, judged, criticized, denied or ignored because they are considered bad, wrong, unacceptable or painful.
   • Triggers are a window into the shadow aspect,
   • Unconscious projection 

Opportunity for self-reflection:
Recognizing triggers in relationships can be a valuable opportunity for self-reflection and "shadow work" - actively examining and integrating the unconscious aspects of ourselves that are being highlighted by our reactions. 

PART 2: Healthy Communication

The fast vs slow lane in love

• Relationships can move at different speeds.
• Ultimately, it’s not the speed that determines the triggers, it’s the depth. Everyone has an emotional threshold. How deep are you willing to be seen, felt, experienced, received and loved? 
• When your experiences of intimacy cross that threshold, triggers will surface and your subconscious will begin to sabotage. 
• When triggers surface, communicate with compassion
• The unconscious people project their trigger. (It’s his/her fault/their fault)
• Happens all the time in dating, especially in the “red-flags” conversation. There’s so much energy going outwards and focusing outwards, and not the awareness that if you’re experiencing the trigger, it is within YOU.
• When something triggers you, FIRST you must acknowledge the trigger within you. its easy to get defensive or shut down. One great approach is to start by acknowledging the tension and validating the feeling  The key to navigating this moment is to communicate with compassion. 
• Timing is everything. Knowing when to communicate is just as important as how you communicate.
• It’s ok to take a step back before having a conversation. You can even ask, “when is the right time for you to talk about this?” 
• Respecting timing ensures both partners are in the right emotional space to listen and understand.
• Reframe “I don’t like” to “I feel”
• Language matters. Instead of saying “I don’t like when you do this,” try “I feel (emotion) when  this happens.” This shifts the conversation from a place of judgment to a place of vulnerability and understanding, which creates a safer space for your partner to respond.
•  When you can’t speak, write or reflect. Sometimes words fail us in the heat of the moment. 
• Trust, love and respect over fear 
• At the core of emotional triggers is often a battle between trust and fear. 
• **Address the small stuff before it becomes big stuff.
• Small issues can snowball into huge problems if left unaddressed. 

1. Allow Grief Process/ Accept and Validate the Pain of Heartbreak
   • Acknowledge the full range of emotions following a breakup, from sadness and anger to relief and confusion.
   • Allow emotional (energies) to move through. Ride each wave.
   • Validating these feelings is a healthy step in letting go, rather than suppressing or dismissing them.
   • Grief Process: 
     1. Denial, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance
2. Radical Acceptance of what is
   • Understanding that denial is part of the grief process, know that acceptance is the goal.
   • Too many women take action before they reach acceptance. (texting him, begging, trying to get him back, stalking him, his socials and his new girlfriends, etc) 
     1. He won’t come back until and unless you’ve healed, grown or he has a change of heart. You can’t force it.
3. Reflect on Lessons Learned from the Past Relationship
   • There’s value in reflecting on what the relationship taught you—both about yourself and what they need in future relationships.
   • Offer journaling prompts or questions to help listeners identify lessons and insights that can guide their growth. 
   • ** (journal prompts)
4. Practice Forgiveness for Yourself and Your Ex-Partner
   • Explain that forgiveness doesn’t mean condoning any hurt but is a way to release lingering resentment and free up emotional energy.
   • Ways to practice forgiveness, 
     1. writing a letter (whether sent or unsent) 
     2. Raging (swamping)
     3. Radical self compassion (through meditation)/ tapping into your body and accepting what is
     4. Perspective (put yourself in his shoes).
     5. Consider the gift (“I’m so happy and grateful this happened because…)
5. Rebuilding Yourself
   • Self-Love and Self-Care
   • Emphasize the importance of nurturing oneself and rebuilding confidence after a breakup.
     1. What have you overlooked about yourself that now you can get back? Hobbies, passions, unique sense of humor, stifled personality traits, etc. Get back to your true self. 
     2. In what ways was your confidence rocked in this whole thing? That stimulus is gone, so remember who you are.
   • Provide ideas for self-care activities and routines that promote healing, self-worth, and reconnection with personal passions.
6. Setting New Intentions for Future Relationships
   • Shift your focus from past hurt to envisioning what you desire in future relationships.
   • Exercises, like creating a list of desired traits in a partner or visualizing the ideal partnership, to start manifesting a brighter future in love. FEEL.

Deeper understanding of Red and Green Flags

1. Define what red flags are: behaviors or traits that signal potential for unhealthy or toxic relationships. 
   • They mirror back what you are subconsciously allowing, desiring or “needing.”
   • Before pointing fingers, the true Queen observes the red flag in her field and recognizes that if it wasn’t a shadow aspect of her, she would not be experiencing it. From there, she can decide what to do about it. Stay and transform within herself to back her boundaries, or Leave and transform herself to no longer attract that experience.
   • 
     

Define green flags: positive behaviors that indicate a partner is likely to support a healthy, nurturing connection.

1. These reflect a more healed, authentic, empowered and high-value within you.

Common Red Flags in Dating

• Highlight several major red flags:
• Fast Pursuit of Sex (You’ll disrespect yourself)
• Inconsistent Communication: When they regularly cancel, ghost, or don’t follow through. (You’ll take on that load of responsibility)
• Lack of Accountability: Avoidance of responsibility or refusal to admit mistakes. (You’ll doubt yourself)
• Disrespect of Boundaries: Ignoring or dismissing personal boundaries. (You’ll lose confidence in your truth)
• Intense Jealousy or Possessiveness: Signs of controlling behavior. (You’ll lose trust in yourself)
• Gaslighting: Manipulating or denying reality, leaving you questioning your own perception. (You’ll lose yourself)
• Emotional Unavailability: not able to say “I love you,” open his heart, get vulnerable/share your past, feelings and pains. (They will eventually sabotage: Set you free)
• Insecurity: Expressing “You’re too good for me.” “I don’t know why you’re with a guy like me.” “I”m afraid someday you’ll leave me for someone else.” “You’re out of my league.” (They’ll push you away bc they don’t feel worthy of you.)
• ***(HARD ONE TO ADMIT) Intense emotions within yourself: anxiety, need, obsession, incessant thinking about him, fixation on the text/call frequency, obsessing on his whereabouts
• The importance of trusting intuition when these red flags appear.
• The importance of assessing beliefs: Do you believe most men are “red flag men?” Your beliefs about men represent and reflect your beliefs about yourself and what you’re worthy of.
• Positive Green Flags to Look For

List green flags that signal a healthy partner:

1. • Consistent, Healthy, Clear Communication: They openly express thoughts and feelings and listen actively.
   • Respect for Boundaries: Honoring boundaries without pushing or challenging them.
   • Genuine Interest and Support: They show enthusiasm about your goals and encourage your growth.
   • Accountability and Self-Reflection: Willingness to own up to mistakes and grow from them.
   • Respect for Personal Space and Independence: They support your individuality and value time apart.
   • Easy expression of feelings:
   • Confidence/life purpose:

Focus on these traits to create a foundation for a lasting relationship. First, you have to hold yourself to the same standards

• You can’t expect someone to exude qualities that you don’t.
• How to Assess for Red and Green Flags in Early Dating
• Most teachers would say….Share strategies for gauging compatibility without judgment, like asking open-ended questions and observing behavior. (job interview)
• I say…..Turn the mirror onto yourself also. Notice his behavior but ALSO how you (your body) reacts to it. What patterns are arising in you? Do you feel anxious or calm? Do you feel desperation or safety?
• Understand you’re merging two lives and that’s a messy process, so don’t be TOO picky about small stuff. 
• E

1. Understanding What Self-Love Really Means
   • Redefine self-love beyond just treating yourself; explain it as deep acceptance, compassion, and nurturing for oneself.
   • Self-love is a spectrum. You can heal on your own or through relationship. Relationship is a mirror to you. You will invite love in to the degree that you love yourself. 
2. Identifying and Celebrating Unique Strengths and Values
   • Exploring and honoring personal strengths, passions, and values as a way to deepen self-knowledge…shadow work, acceptance
   • Exercises to help get clear on what you love about yourself and how to celebrate those qualities.
     1. What makes you unique? Special?
     2. What makes you quirky?
     3. What have you accomplished? What are you proud of?
     4. What have you overcome? Healed from?
     5. What do you STILL have to heal from?
3. The Power of Setting Boundaries
   • How setting boundaries is a critical aspect of self-love and communicates self-respect to others.
     1. Boundaries are more for yourself. They communicate to the other what you’re available for and what you’re not.
4. Developing Inner Confidence through Self-Care and Self-Expression
   • Practical self-care techniques to nurture body, mind, and soul and reinforce self-worth.
   • Encourage self-expression, like through creativity or personal style, as a way to cultivate confidence and authenticity.
5. Letting Go of Comparison and Embracing Individuality
   • Discuss the role of comparison in diminishing self-worth, especially in today’s social media world.
   • Share strategies for focusing inwardly and celebrating individuality to build unshakeable confidence.

• Definition and Origin:
  • Originating from South Korea, the "4B Movement" empowers women to opt out of traditional patriarchal structures.
  • Focus on rejecting societal pressures to conform to roles tied to marriage, relationships, and reproduction.
• Core Principles:
  • "No dating, no sex, no marriage, no children."
  • Promotes self-reliance, self-worth, and personal healing outside of romantic involvement.
• Growing popularity globally as women prioritize their mental health and autonomy.

Healing and Taking Back Your Power

• Shadow reason for swearing off men
  • anger, taking a stand, resentment,
  • Like attracts like: if you’ve attracted difficult people, it means you’re difficult.
  • If you attract avoidants, you’re projecting your own avoidance (and available to avoidance)
• Why Some Women Swear Off Men:
  • Experiences of toxic relationships, emotional burnout, or societal expectations.
  • To heal, find yourself/self-discovery, personal growth, …it’s a recalibration. (It’s not forever)
• The Role of Healing:
  • Emphasizing healing past wounds before entering healthy relationships.
  • Therapy, inner child work, shadow work, and mindfulness practices.
    • In what ways were you (your truth) beat down to the point of you always doubting yourself?
    • If you were cheated on, what are our unfaithful triggers?
    • If you were abandoned, what are the triggers? 
    • If you were abused, what sets you off?
    • If you were disappointed by low quality men, what beliefs are projected out into the world?
  • Practical advice for women using this time to recalibrate their lives.
    • Use this time as a gift, not as a punishment for men. The more you’re in your bliss, the more it will inspire him/them to heal. You can’t force healing through defiance.

1. The Reality of Dating Apps Today
   • The benefits and limitations of dating apps.
   • How to set realistic expectations for app-based dating to avoid frustration and burnout.
2. Crafting an Authentic Profile That Attracts Real Connections
   • Tips for creating a profile that reflects your personality, values, and interests.
3. How to Recognize and Handle Ghosting, Breadcrumbing, and Other Challenges
   • Define 
     1. ghosting, 
     2. breadcrumbing, 
     3. love bombing, 
     4. situationships
   • Strategies for responding when these situations arise and maintaining self-worth despite setbacks.
4. Balancing Openness with Discernment
   • How to stay open to possibilities while practicing discernment in conversations and matches.
   • Tips for setting boundaries and recognizing when a match isn’t aligned without overthinking or overanalyzing.
5. Practicing Self-Care and Avoiding Dating App Burnout
   • Self-care practices to help you stay centered and not become overwhelmed by the highs and lows of online dating.
   • Techniques for stepping back when dating apps feel like too much.

1. Look at yourself: 
   • Dive into your triggers, your patterns, your pain, your trauma…unprocessed shadows manifest as projections outward. Everyone (especially romantic partners are ‘you pushed out.’
2. Know Your Values and Non-Negotiables
   • Identify core values: honesty, compassion, family orientation, or career ambition.
   • Recognizing and standing firm on non-negotiables to avoid compromising on fundamental principles.
3. Embrace Authenticity and Self-Expression
   • Embodying your true self attracts partners who genuinely align.
   • Exercises for exploring what authenticity means in dating.
4. Cultivate Self-Love and Self-Worth
   • How self-love sets the stage for attracting a high-value partner.
5. Focus on a Fulfilled Life Beyond a Relationship
   • How living passionately (hobbies, friendships, personal goals) makes you magnetic.
   • Encouragement to avoid feeling that a partner "completes" you; instead, find someone who complements your journey.
6. Visualize and Manifest Your Ideal Partner
   • The power of visualization and clarity in manifesting love.
   • Techniques like journaling about the type of relationship desired or creating a vision board.

Welcome to the Love Like a Goddess Podcast! Here's where spiritual women gather to hear inspiring stories and learn how to manifest meaningful love the feminine way. I break down all the topics we'll cover from communication and boundaries to owning your self worth, receiving and healing.