Lunchtime in Rome

Lunchtime In Rome Podcast is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 181 is entitled, “Reel Observations.” Social media has impacted our lives in so many ways. What can we learn from it from an emotional needs perspective? We’ll be looking at many examples tonight at The Table!

Get full access to Lunchtime In Rome Podcast at www.lunchtimeinrome.com/subscribe

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 181 is entitled, “Reel Observations.” Social media has impacted our lives in so many ways. What can we learn from it from an emotional needs perspective? We'll be looking at many examples tonight at The Table!

Pull up a seat at the table and join us!

Lunchtime In Rome Podcast is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 180 is entitled, “Be prepared.” Are your relationships "good enough?" When is "good enough" not going to be good enough? Tonight at The Table we're going to be talking about why you should be prepared for tough times in your relationship(s).

Pull up a seat at the table and join us!

Be Prepared - The Importance of a Solid Relationship

* “They’ve changed”

* Since they went to college

* Since they started dating “x”

* Since they started making money

* Since they started partying

* (other ways we’ve noticed people change)

* Money, substances, fame, don’t change you.  They make you more of what you are.

* Your emotional needs don’t change as your circumstances change

* Examples: From a need perspective

Need | Change | Reaction

* Security | Lotto | Hyper controlling, fear of loss, frugality

* Affection | Relationship | Smothering, demanding, jealous

* Attention | Fame | Jealousy, self-promotion, loss of self

* Belonging | Bad relationship | Abuse, self-deprecation

* Respect | Authority | Hyper controlling, abuse

Your hurts don’t change either.

Hurt | Change | Result

* Fear | Money | same as above

* Anger | Substance | Rage

* Guilt | Fame | Imposter

* Self Condemnation | Trauma | Hyper controlling, abuse

Which brings us to the focus on tonight’s talk

* Be prepared and have a solid relationship as trauma is coming

* “When you say ‘I do’ you have no idea what you’re saying ‘I do’ to”

* Examples

* Brian & Lex - Financial, Lex’s mom, health?

* Eric & Amy - Conception issues

* Jay & Rachel - Trey 

* Did your needs change during your trauma?

* Did your hurts change during your trauma?

* My (delicate) examples of the couples I’m dealing with right now

* Good couples with a “model” marriage

* Their hurts/needs are magnified during this time/trauma

* They’re playing “catch up” 

* Good enough is only good enough while things are fine

* When tough times hit, the needs don’t go away and the hurts multiply

* If you survive the trauma, you won’t be better

* You deserve a great intimate relationship beyond wanting to survive trauma

Get full access to Lunchtime In Rome Podcast at www.lunchtimeinrome.com/subscribe

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 180 is entitled, “Be prepared.” Are your relationships "good enough?" When is "good enough" not going to be good enough? Tonight at The Table we're going to be talking about why you should be prepared for tough times in your relationship(s).

Pull up a seat at the table and join us!

Lunchtime In Rome Podcast is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 179 is entitled, “Narcissism, Feelings vs Emotions pt3.” What is a narcissist? Why does narcissism fly in the face of loving others? How does narcissism use feelings instead of meeting others emotions? We’re talking about that tonight at The Table.

Feelings vs. Emotion

* What’s on display in the world today? What’s the world’s current economy

* Narcissism - the feeling of needing to love self above all others.

* It’s selfish, non-sacrificial, artificial, and empty.

* It feeds the sin of wanting to be our own god. It is a counterfeit

* operating system and produces no real fruit

* Plain and simple, it is pride, vanity, and ego that only terminates on itself

* Four kinds of narcissism

* Grandiose narcissist - the classic representation of the narcissist (dresses better than everyone, arrogant, lacking empathy, egotistical, attention seeking, validation seeking, the entire world revolves around this person, all the time)

* Malignant narcissist - all of the things the grandiose narcissist is but also incredibly mean and does really bad things - steal from their company, cheat, steal, great criminals (Bernie Madoff, politicians)

* Covert narcissist - someone who feels like a victim of everything of the world while being all the things a malignant narcissist is. “Life done them wrong”, passive aggressive.

* Communal narcissist - virtue signallers. “Look at me! I’m giving to charity! I’m at this event! I’m doing this good thing!!!”

* Exploitation - using others for your own personal gain, to feel better about yourself

* Constant tearing down and criticism of others

* Victimizing others to selfishly accomplish something that benefits you or your group

Get full access to Lunchtime In Rome Podcast at www.lunchtimeinrome.com/subscribe

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s episode 179 is entitled, “Narcissism, Feelings vs Emotions pt3.” What is a narcissist? Why does narcissism fly in the face of loving others? How does narcissism use feelings instead of meeting others emotions? We’re talking about that tonight at The Table.

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s is episode 178 entitled, “Feelings vs Emotions pt2.” Do you find people of faith don’t respond to you emotionally? Do you get platitudes and judgment rather than true comfort? Does God care about our emotions? This week at The Table we will continue our discussion on Feelings vs Emotions and look at what God has to do with all of it.

Lunchtime In Rome Podcast is a reader-supported publication. To receive new posts and support my work, consider becoming a free or paid subscriber.

Feelings vs. Emotions

* God and feelings/emotions

* God only experienced one (negative) feeling through Jesus

* God feels anger 

* Jesus overturning the tables in the temple

* Ephesians 4:26 “In your anger do not sin”

* Isaiah 5:25 (On this account, the anger of the LORD has burned against His people, And He has stretched out His hand against them and struck them down. And the mountains quaked, and their corpses lay like refuse in the middle of the streets. For all this, His anger is not spent, But His hand is still stretched out)

* God has given us emotions to reflect our significance as a creation made in His image. God has emotions.

* God is Affectionate and loves 

* John 3:16 

* Romans 5:8 (But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us)

* God grieves and seeks to comfort

* John 11 – Lazarus – Jesus wept and then raised Lazarus from the dead

* 2 Corinthians 1:3-9 (3 Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of mercies and God of all comfort, 4 who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.)

* John 16:33 (I have told you these things, so that in me you may have peace. In this world you will have trouble. But take heart! I have overcome the world.)

* God encourages

* Deuteronomy 31:6 (Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you)

* Romans 15:5-6 (May the God who gives endurance and encouragement give you the same attitude of mind toward each other that Christ Jesus had, so that with one mind and one voice you may glorify the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ.)

* Etc. It’s clear that God displays emotions more often than feeling and is never manipulated by them (feelings), and if God Himself clearly displays emotions, then we need to be very intentional about understanding them. By understanding these, we can then understand others (love your neighbor) and ourselves (…as yourself). When we understand emotions, we understand how to operate on God’s economy, not the feelings of this world’s

Get full access to Lunchtime In Rome Podcast at www.lunchtimeinrome.com/subscribe

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s is episode 178 entitled, “Feelings vs Emotions pt2.” Do you find people of faith don't respond to you emotionally? Do you get platitudes and judgment rather than true comfort? Does God care about our emotions? This week at The Table we will continue our discussion on Feelings vs Emotions and look at what God has to do with all of it.

Feelings vs. Emotions

* Last week, we hit on a topic when Brian said “feelings are different than emotions” and we began a discussion about what that really means? So what DOES it mean?

* It is important to note that psychologists spend years studying and defining this on a clinical and scholastic level.  It is our goal/motive to make this relatable and understandable on a practical level.  

* Feelings are ambiguous and superficial, found directly in the conscience

* We feel “good” or “bad” but don’t have the vocabulary to explain why

* They are fleeting and ever-shifting

* Brian’s take: In and of themselves, they never satisfy. They’re like an undefined drug that we look to “hit”, and when we can’t get that “hit” we’re looking for, we feel empty and lacking

* Satan LOVES to deal and operate on the “feelings” level

* People are keenly aware of their feelings and demand that they be accounted for.

* In the most general of terms, the 4 places hurts go are the primary (negative) emotions

* Angry

* Guilty

* Fearful

* Self-condemning

* Emotions are eternal and fundamental, they exist in the subconscience

* Emotions and emotional awareness are intentional and defined (as we’ve been doing for the past 176 episodes)

* Emotions are concrete and tangible. They are as real as our DNA.

* Emotions are what fuels (along with physical stimuli) our feelings

* People are largely unaware of their emotions and are manipulated by them

* When our emotional needs are unmet or taken from us we experience negative feelings.

Get full access to Lunchtime In Rome Podcast at www.lunchtimeinrome.com/subscribe

Welcome everyone and pull up a seat at the table. It’s Lunchtime in Rome. Tonight’s is episode 177 entitled, “Feelings vs Emotions.” What is the difference between feelings and emotions? Why do feelings get so much attention while emotions are most often misunderstood and ignored? We're talking about that this week at The Table.

Feelings vs. Emotions

Last week, we hit on a topic when Brian said “feelings are different than emotions” and we began a discussion about what that really means? So what DOES it mean?

It is important to note that psychologists spend years studying and defining this on a clinical and scholastic level.  It is our goal/motive to make this relatable and understandable on a practical level.  

Feelings are ambiguous and superficial, found directly in the conscience

We feel “good” or “bad” but don’t have the vocabulary to explain why

They are fleeting and ever-shifting

Brian’s take: In and of themselves, they never satisfy. They’re like an undefined drug that we look to “hit”, and when we can’t get that “hit” we’re looking for, we feel empty and lacking

Satan LOVES to deal and operate on the “feelings” level

People are keenly aware of their feelings and demand that they be accounted for.

In the most general of terms, the 4 places hurts go are the primary (negative) emotions

Angry

Guilty

Fearful

Self-condemning

Emotions are eternal and fundamental, they exist in the subconscience

Emotions and emotional awareness are intentional and defined (as we’ve been doing for the past 176 episodes)

Emotions are concrete and tangible. They are as real as our DNA.

Emotions are what fuels (along with physical stimuli) our feelings

People are largely unaware of their emotions and are manipulated by them

When our emotional needs are unmet or taken from us we experience negative feelings.