And so it was, all that god save the queen patriotism really came to nothing but a hangover and a realisation that England truly is Babylon. In this episode, the girls reminisce on that fateful evening, and discuss all the TV shows and films (not books because we really like being employed) that started off amazingly, and ended up a bit shit. The main characters also tell their stories of not coming home; Rochelle describes accidentally falling into a shop that had been left open at 3am, Katie laments at the drinking of dark fruits at any time before 4pm and Soraya details how she got drunk when most people were doing the school run or morning commute. Not everyday wholesome book chat guys.

In this episode, the girls pretend like they haven't been chaotically releasing episodes whenever they fancy (we did say chaos in our description, sorry), they also talk about how they would lay down and die if the world was ending and discuss Love Island. The theme of the week is are you not embaRAZed and the girls reveal their guilty pleasure book that may or may not be about a very rich man into bondage and named after a tone... Katie explains how she destroyed her musical theatre career at the age of 15, Soraya describes simping for a man who hated her and Rochelle tries to compete in singing Disney songs with Katie. 

This week the girls discuss the return of the greatest show to grace UK television, so please stand for the national anthem; the Love Island theme song. They also finally admit which books and shows they never finished, even if it exiles them from twitter, and parties they've exited early. Rochelle tells us of how she ran away from a hot guy mid kiss, Katie shares the importance of her own bed at the end of a night out, and Soraya expresses how much of a basic bitch she is with her FOMO. Don't say we never do anything for you! 

This episode you find out just how hard your favourite hosts truly are. Katie, Rochelle and Soraya share with you some of their favourite True Crime books and shows, as well as the best type of thrillers that get you right in the feels. The hottest hosts in publishing explore what makes a good thriller and crime story, the fact that serial killers like Dexter are actually hot, and times they may have been a bit naughty with the law. Rochelle reveals her life of crime from skipping train barriers as a child, Katie exposes her drastic attempts to get dream matte mousse regardless of the dangers, and Soraya shares with us her time as an incarcerated young offender. Not only are these ladies sexy bitches, but they're also bad bitches. 

Disclaimer: the girls are not actually irl criminals, they want to keep their jobs pls and thanks. 

In this episode the girls are joined by the romcommoisseur and author of the Sunday Times bestselling Love in Colour, Bolu Babalola. It would be rude not to talk about love when the world's leading expert in the area joins the podcast, so the girls talk about their favourite romcoms (Twilight unfortunately included), their ideal fictional romances (men and reversing the car, amirite?) and probably a bit too much talk about fellatio (we're always sorry). Bolu role-plays interviewing Soraya about her boyfriend Dylan O'Brien, Rochelle imagines a life in the country with Bella Hadid and Katie describes the joy in making a man clench their butt. Anyway... enjoy!

In this episode the girls are sober. Soraya tells a story about a not-like-other-girls orange prom dress, Katie says 'who said I can't wear my converse with my dress' because that's just her, and Katie tells Rochelle that she has a flat-chested personality. There's twerking (audio only), a lot of singing and of course, the most spot on French accents in the UK.

You won, Jane. Enjoy the money, I hope it makes you happy. This week your favourite book baddies discuss the high's and low's of awards seasons; including the recently broadcasted Nibbies, Booker, Academy Awards and Grammy's. They give you their 'what a sad little life, Jane' moments of their own with Rochelle's haunting memories of working as a bartender, Katie beating her arch nemesis at a dance competition, and Soraya 'making it' to the theatrical stage (in Ilford). 

In this episode the girls talk about heartbreaks and periods and A Little Life. You can’t say we don’t bring you variety! Soraya changes the way we should pronounce ‘pastor’ forever, Rochelle reads a poem and gets everyone in their feels and Katie almost throws up when the conversation turn to blood clots. If you love the Main Character energy of travelling on a train while it’s raining and listening to heartbreak anthems like you’re in a music video, this episode is the one for you. 

In this episode of Main Characters madness the girls dish the dirt on all the celebs they’ve met, and you guessed it, say if they find them hot unprovoked! Katie manages to do a hark the herald angels sing/Body by Russ and Tion Wayne remix, they discuss *that* traumatic Oloni thread, Soraya tells the most disgusting story to ever exist and Rochelle describes how she almost lipsed a Mighty Boosh cast member. Oh, and they also talk about some books. 

It's only an author episode!!

It's also the most explicit one yet, so you know, peaks and troughs. 

This episode the girls are talking about hot hot summer romances, inspired by Voyeur, the new novel by Francesca Reece. In this bilingual episode they talk about that scene in Call Me By Your Name, no not that one, the arguably more traumatic one in the book (if you know, you know, and they're planning to set up a support group), spoil Bonjour Tristesse for Rochelle, who only speaks one language (bad bitch) and tell stories of their own very steamy summer affairs. Francesca says Rochelle's name in a French accent, Katie tells a story about a digit in a trailer park, and Soraya expresses her love for the queen, Jenny Han.

NSF, and they cannot stress this enough, W.