Ever had one of those days where you're sprinting down a hallway in heels, hoping your pantyhose don't rip, all to rescue a kindergartner stuck in the frame of an overhead projector?
In my previous career as a school leader, I had a vision of shaping the future. I wanted to create a world where our children could choose any dream or goal based on their passions, equipped with the education to succeed.
However, working towards that vision wasn't always straightforward.
One typical Tuesday morning at school, my secretary rushed in and said, "Mrs. Hardin, there's an emergency in the kindergarten room."
Without a second thought, I jumped up and ran down the hallway in my heels and pantyhose—yes, that's what we wore back then.
When I walked into the classroom of one of my favorite kindergarten teachers, I said, "Here to help!"
She motioned for me to come forward. She was sitting and reading a book, keeping the kids engaged as a good teacher does.
As I approached, she pointed down to a little five-year-old boy with his finger stuck in the hole of the frame that held the overhead projector. He wasn't crying or upset—just worried he might get in trouble.
Seeing him stuck took me back to times when I've felt stuck or watched friends struggle with their goals and dreams.
I remembered my first marriage when I had to get my wedding ring off after my divorce. So, I grabbed some lotion, slathered it on his finger, and gently worked it free.
How do we get stuck to begin with?
I think we learn how to be stuck from common advice heard in movies, read in books, T-shirt slogans, words said to us by parents and teachers, or a bumper sticker on a car in front of us at a red light.
Examples of Common Advice We Hear:
* "Play it Safe"
* Stick to what you know; don't take risks.
* "Settle for Less"
* Don't aim too high; lower your expectations.
* "Stay in Your Comfort Zone"
* Avoid stepping outside your usual boundaries.
* "Listen to Your Doubts"
* If you feel unsure, it's a sign you shouldn't proceed.
* "Compare Yourself to Others"
* Constantly measure your worth against others' achievements.
* "Wait for the Right Moment"
* Hold off on your dreams until everything feels perfect.
* "Seek Approval from Others"
* Rely on others' opinions to validate your decisions.
* "Focus on Your Weaknesses"
* Pay more attention to what you can't do rather than what you can.
* "Avoid Failure at All Costs"
* Fear of failing should keep you from trying new things.
* "Be Realistic"
* Don't dream too big; stay practical and realistic.
These pieces of advice reinforce the belief that we are not capable or worthy, keeping us from a clear path to joy, purpose, and accomplishment.
So, there I was, freed the little guy’s finger with the magic of hand lotion, saving the day in my heels and pantyhose.
As I watched him run off to play, it hit me—getting unstuck is often simpler than we think.
We’ve all heard these bits of advice that keep us spinning our wheels. It’s like being trapped in a never-ending game of "Mother, May I?" where we ask for permission to take a step forward.
Spoiler alert: you don't need anyone's permission but your own.
Imagine if we followed all that misguided advice to the letter.
We'd all be huddled in our comfort zones, comparing ourselves to everyone on social media, waiting for the perfect moment to arrive while twiddling our thumbs.
Spoiler alert: the perfect moment is like Bigfoot—lots of sightings, no solid evidence.
Instead of playing it safe, I say we embrace the chaos.
The next time you find yourself stuck, remember that a little lotion (or metaphorical push) is all you need.
Laugh at the ridiculousness of waiting for perfection.
Picture this: You’re at a red light behind a car with a bumper sticker that says, "Be Realistic."
Roll down your window, give them a middle finger, thumbs up or peace sign (depending on your personality), and then proceed to dream big anyway.
Because realistic is for seat belts and mortgages—not for dreams.
So here’s my challenge: let’s ditch the bad advice, grab some metaphorical lotion, and slip out of those stuck moments.
Life is too short to wait for permission.
Run down that hallway, heels and all, because your dreams are waiting at the other end.
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