Man Alive

What’s it going to take for you, your loved one, or a friend to start healing from childhood wounds? Healing is all about pain—acknowledging it’s there, identifying where it’s coming from, and then knowing how to face it, grieve, accept it, take control, and heal.

Join Pat Morley for an overview of the stages of healing. God’s promise is that no matter how deeply you or your loved one have been wounded, you don’t have to stay that way.

Reflection and Discussion

1. How would you describe the emotions you’re feeling about authentically engaging with the stages of healing just described? For example, you could be any, or all, of the following: excited, hopeful, encouraged, positive, apprehensive, unsure, skeptical, fearful, anxious.

2. “You are not responsible for what happened to you, but you are the only one who can do anything about it now.” Do you agree with this statement? Why or why not? If yes, what are the implications for you personally?

3. If applicable, which of the healing stages described in this chapter have you already processed? Which stage do you want to tackle next, and why?

Do you regularly find yourself feeling insecure and looking for reassurance? Do you experience big mood swings, but don’t know why? Are you especially responsible or immature for your age? Do you have a negative experience, word, thought, or voice in your head from your childhood that stills torments you? Are you estranged from any family members physically or emotionally?

Join Pat Morley for Part 2 of how the 9 major characteristics of men with childhood wounds are affecting you or your loved ones.

Reflection and Discussion

1. What is a self-doubt that makes you feel insecure?

2. Have you recently experienced a big mood swing? What were the circumstances?

3. Have you assumed the role of the responsible son or of a man especially immature for his age? Why do you think the role you identified describes you?

4. Is there a negative experience, word, thought, or voice in your head from your childhood that still torments?

5. From which of your parents and siblings are you alienated because of what happened in your childhood?

The following questions might apply to you or a loved one:

Do you struggle to believe that people really care about you?

Do others accuse you of being oversensitive or taking things too personally?

Is there something that routinely triggers your anger?

Is there a particular area of your life where you struggle to understand what normal, healthy male behavior looks like?

Join me, Pat Morley, and learn how 9 major characteristics of men with childhood wounds are affecting you or your loved ones. It’s going to be a great day!

Reflection and Discussion

1. To what extent do you struggle to believe that people really care about you? Give an

example.

2. Do others accuse you of being oversensitive or taking things too personally? Give an

example.

3. Is there something that routinely triggers your anger? How are you able to control it?

4. Is there a particular area of your life where you struggle to understand what normal,

healthy male behavior looks like? If there is, who is someone you could ask to take you

under his wing in that area and show you the ropes?

If your parents were never properly parented themselves, that put them at great risk to repeat

the cycle with you. And that puts you at risk of repeating the vicious cycle all over again.

If you or someone you love is caught in a cycle, can put a stop to your family’s

intergenerational dysfunction. But first you must become an emotionally, mentally, and

spiritually healthy person yourself. The starting point is to understand what every little boy or

girl needs as a child, and how parents create wounds.

Join me, Pat Morley, for a look at the 4 building blocks of a healthy home, and the 7 negative

parenting styles that make homes dysfunctional. In this series, I’m going to show you how

becoming a healthy man, husband, and father may be easier than you think.

Reflection and Discussion

1. How would you describe your relationship with your father, mother, or caregiver today?

For example:

cordial, strained, warm, estranged.

2. What was your childhood missing in the areas of love, structure, roots, or wings?

3. Which of the seven generalized descriptions of negative parenting are most relevant for

you (e.g., “my parents were passive”), and why?

There are millions of us. We carry around leftover pain from childhood wounds.

As a result of this unprocessed pain, we act out in ways that damage our relationships. We’re

easily offended. Fragile. We lash out. We withdraw. We’re baffled by our behavior. Frankly,

we’re not even sure what normal behavior looks like.

We all want to silence the voices of the past, but the way forward is shrouded in mystery. We

look at our lives and can’t help wondering, Is this as good as it gets? We’re terrified we might

repeat the cycle with our own spouses and children, rather than break it.

What we really want—have always wanted—is for our parents to love us, believe in us, and be

proud of us. We ache to be encouraged, respected, and valued. We yearn for their approval and

affirmation—to be the gleam in their eyes. That’s what you and I need to thrive.

So, whether it’s for you personally, someone you love, or so you can help others, join Pat

Morley as he draws inspiration from his new book, From Broken Boy to Mended Man, to

introduce us to this timely topic!