In this deeply moving episode for Suicide Awareness Month, I sit down with Gina Oliverson—wife of Sean Oliverson and mother to Ellie—to share her side of the tragedy that reshaped their family two years ago.

When Gina's husband, Sean—a respected orthodontist and pillar of strength—tragically took his life, her world changed in a single second. Yet, in the middle of unimaginable shock and grief, Gina chose not to let anger or bitterness take root in her heart.

In this episode, Gina discusses how she supported her children through their unique grieving processes, the power of a consistent morning routine with God, and how she found peace through scriptural promises and personal miracles. She also shares how she turned her grief into purpose by starting a non-profit organization dedicated to helping men with their mental health.

If you are currently navigating the fallout of suicide, dealing with heavy family loss, or deciding whether to open the door to bitterness or the door to Christ, Gina’s story is a testament that joy and hope can exist alongside deep sorrow.

What you’ll hear:

A 25-year love story: Meeting at Utah State and building a family centered on hard work.

The onset of a nervous breakdown: How perfectionism, OCD, and insomnia spiraled out of control.

Recognizing missed warning signs: Loss of interest, withdrawal, and "uncomfortable" goodbyes.

The day of the tragedy: The sticky note, the search, and the immediate shock.

Seeing God's hand in grief: Angels showing up, ministering to her son, and thin veils.

Choosing appreciation over depreciation: Why bitterness destroys peace and how faith restores joy.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

Welcome back to The Matt Richardson Podcast. Today’s episode features an incredible, inspiring conversation with my friend Ellie Dupaix on navigating suicide loss, overcoming victim mentality, and building an authentic testimony of Jesus Christ.

Two years ago, Ellie experienced an unthinkable tragedy: she was the one who found her father, Sean Oliver—a strong, sturdy, beloved orthodontist—after he tragically lost his life to suicide. Ellie opens up about who her father really was, painting a picture far beyond how he passed away—from his playful teasing and quiet presence in the mountains to his unwavering belief in her abilities and the secret "I love you" sign he’d flash from the gym bleachers.

Ellie details the unexpected months leading up to his passing, seeing her steady father cry for the first time as he battled hidden, ruminating thoughts and severe insomnia. She takes us through that heavy Sunday afternoon, finding his phone, stepping into the backyard shed, and the unbearable pain of falling to her knees when reality set in.

She shares the dark, disorienting days that followed—questioning if God was even real—and the miraculous shift that occurred when her family chose to open their eyes to the tangible light of Christ moving through their community. From her 4-month "hibernation era" of staying in bed and going on sunset walks with her dog, to starting a prayer journal where she wrote to God like a friend, Ellie shares how she surrendered her grief to the Lord, turned her ashes into beauty, and rebuilt her life on an unshakable personal relationship with Jesus.

What you’ll hear:

Beyond the tragedy: Remembering Sean Oliver’s strength, curiosity, and love.

The warning signs of ruminating thoughts, insomnia, and OCD in strong men.

Finding her father: Navigating the immediate shock, guilt, and disorienting darkness.

Discerning agency and tragedy: Recognizing that God didn't abandon her family.

The "Hibernation Era": Why taking time to heal in bed and nature was vital.

Writing to God as a friend: How a prayer journal transformed her spiritual walk.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

Welcome back to The Matt Richardson Podcast. Today's episode features an incredible, mind-blowing testimony of deliverance with my brother Jose Lopez.

For years, Jose lived behind a dark, demonic mask. Having survived childhood physical abuse, he constructed an alternative persona to insulate himself from pain. His quest for self-protection escalated into extreme dark art—dyeing his hair, wearing pentagrams, imitating the Joker, and posting videos of himself mocking the crucifixion of Christ.

Though he achieved fame, money, and status in the dark entertainment world, Jose's soul was dying. He opens up about the terrifying moment he looked in his bedroom mirror and saw a demon staring back, and how his soul began screaming out for help.

Jose shares how God met him right in his bedroom through a Holy Spirit-inspired message, washing away his sins, driving out the spirits of darkness, and completely restoring his true identity. Together, we unpack the reality of spiritual warfare, the trap of holding onto subtle idols, and how Jesus Christ can take someone who once blasphemed His name and turn them into a fire-filled evangelist.

What you’ll hear:

How childhood abuse and trauma force young kids to build dark alter-egos.

The hidden danger of horror movies, dark personas, and inviting demonic spirits.

The mirror experience: Staring into the dark and seeing a demon inside.

How God bypassed religious institutions to meet a broken man directly in his bedroom.

Physical signs of deliverance: Hearing demonic spirits screech as Christ enters.

Letting go of the final mask: Truly surrendering all idols to follow Jesus 100%.

If you found yourself in my story today, please know you don't have to walk through the darkness alone. This podcast is dedicated to providing you with the spiritual truth, guidance, and community you need to find true freedom.

In this episode, I sit down with Diego Arellan for an incredibly transparent and authentic conversation about surviving childhood trauma, leaving behind a transgender lifestyle, and experiencing the radical redemption of Jesus Christ.

Exposed to sexual immorality at just five years old following his father's passing, Diego grew up wrestling deeply with his identity. Craving the male attention and love he missed as a child, he created a fake online persona named "Katherine" as a teenager before eventually transitioning into a woman as an adult. He took hormones for years, underwent multiple surgeries, and lived in Miami with a wealthy "sugar daddy" who bought him everything he wanted. But having all the money, beauty, and status in the world only left him depressed, addicted to drugs, and at total rock bottom.

Diego opens up about the powerful phone call from his sister that introduced him to Jesus, his fears about stepping into a church dressed as a woman, and the exact moment at a park where the Holy Spirit hit his body like electricity. He shares how God opened his spiritual eyes to see his "female" identity as just a costume, leading him to cut his hair, detransition, and step boldly into his calling as a man of God.

We also dive deep into the roots of same-sex attraction, healing childhood wounds, how Planned Parenthood fast-tracks transitions, and what true deliverance really looks like in the face of ongoing temptation.

What you’ll hear:

Childhood trauma, broken homes, and the early seeds of gender dysphoria.

Planned Parenthood & Hormones: How a 30-minute conversation fast-tracked his transition.

The reality of living with a "sugar daddy" in Miami while drowning in drug addiction and depression.

The park encounter: Feeling the physical presence of God and seeing the "veil" drop.

Detransitioning: Reclaiming his God-given masculinity and casting away past identities.

Healing the wound: Why same-sex attraction is a wounded relationship with masculinity, not an identity.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

Welcome back to The Matt Richardson Podcast. Today, I am joined by Casey Hartwig for an incredible story of redemption, identity, and the power of the Gospel.

After years of struggling with same-sex attraction and feeling like she was born in the wrong body, Casey transitioned into a man. She took testosterone injections for years, underwent a double mastectomy, and built a completely new identity as "Cruise". But the happiness promised by the world never arrived.

When her father passed away, Casey began seeking God for the first time. Through prayer, studying scripture, and learning that God doesn't make mistakes when He creates His children, Casey made the decision to step away from gender dysphoria and de-transition.

In this episode, Casey shares how surrendering her flesh allowed Jesus to change the desires of her heart, restore her soft femininity, and give her an unshakable identity as a daughter of God.

What you’ll hear:

Confounding tomboy tendencies with "being born in the wrong body".

The process of getting testosterone through Planned Parenthood.

The spiritual and physical reality of de-transitioning back to a woman.

Practical ways to surrender same-sex attraction and see others through God’s eyes.

Why true freedom is found in crucifying the flesh and walking in the Spirit.

If you found yourself in my story today, please know you don't have to walk through the darkness alone. This podcast is dedicated to providing you with the spiritual truth, guidance, and community you need to find true freedom.

Welcome back to The Matt Richardson Podcast. Today’s episode features an incredible story of radical transformation with Monica Samuel and Pastor Tina. 

Monica spent 27 years identifying as gay and was deeply involved in the LGBTQ+ community, even getting married to a woman in an affirming church. She opens up about her initial entry into the lifestyle during college, her experiences attending Pride events, and how seeing shocking behavior at parades made her question the movement. She also details sitting in an affirming church—where the pastor drank a beer at the altar—and experiencing a terrifying, supernatural vision of the church floor splitting open into hell.

Monica shares the turning point when she heard the audible voice of God, leading her to walk into a World Prayer Center where she met Pastor Tina. She shares the raw moment she got baptized fully clothed and publicly renounced homosexuality over the microphone, as well as the bold steps she took afterward to break all soul ties—including giving away her car, guitar, and wedding ring.

Pastor Tina shares her perspective as a leader who was led by the Holy Spirit to pray for Monica, offering wisdom on how to support those leaving the lifestyle and why it is vital to fill your temple with the Word of God to prevent the enemy from returning.

What you’ll hear:

27 years in the LGBTQ+ community: From college basketball to Pride events.

The distortion of affirming churches and the "Queen James" version of the Bible.

A chilling vision of an affirming church splitting open into hell.

Hearing God's voice and renouncing 27 years of homosexuality at the baptismal altar.

Breaking soul ties: Giving away a car, wedding ring, and belongings to follow Christ.

Pastor Tina’s perspective on disciplining, spiritual deliverance, and filling your temple.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

In this episode, I share a deeply personal letter I wrote to myself as if I were in heaven before being born, preparing my soul for the life, trials, and persecution I would experience on earth.

Born into the last days prophesied by holy prophets, I fell for the lies of the enemy at a young age. Introduced to explicit content at 13, I spent years lost in addiction, same-sex attraction, and chasing the temporary pleasures of the world. I found myself standing at the gates of hell—depressed, suicidal, and trapped in darkness. But at the bottom of that pit, I surrendered my life to Jesus Christ and allowed His grace to set me completely free.

In this letter, I address the public persecution, mocking, and ridicule I would face for stepping into my calling to share my testimony online. I detail the lies the devil tries to place in my head—that I should feel embarrassed or that sharing my darkest parts will ruin my future.

I also share the powerful download I received from the Holy Spirit after posting about my sexuality for the first time: how Jesus hung on the cross, mocked by the world, endured the pain for the "one person" who would be saved. Six months later, I share real messages from men and women whose lives have been completely transformed through this exact ministry.

What you’ll hear:

The pre-mortal perspective: Writing a letter to prepare myself for earthly trials.

Falling for the lie that pleasure brings happiness, and ending up at the gates of hell.

Overcoming the enemy's lies designed to make you feel embarrassed by your testimony.

The vision of Jesus on the cross: Why standing for truth is always for "the one".

Real testimonials from clients who have overcome addictions to sex, porn, and men.

Standing boldly, authentically, and unapologetically for Jesus Christ in the last days.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

In this episode, I share a very personal letter that I wrote to Jesus Christ just before getting baptized to rededicate my life to Him.

For years, I believed the lie that pleasure, money, status, and image would bring true fulfillment. At 22 years old, I was making $500,000, leading a team of 60 sales reps, and living a wild lifestyle—yet I was spiritually dead, empty, and hating my life. Worldly pleasure didn't bring me joy; it led me straight to the gates of hell.

Ten months ago, I was at rock bottom, addicted to lust and pornography, having tried every recovery group and white-knuckling technique without success. But when I put the promise of Galatians 5:16 to the test and chose to walk in the Spirit daily through scripture, fasting, and fervent prayer, God completely purged the demon of lust from my mind and replaced my heart of stone with a heart of flesh.

In this video, I read the exact letter I wrote to my Savior for my baptism, declaring the burial of my old wicked self and my new identity as a warrior for His kingdom. I also break down the promise from the Gospel of Mark: why any sacrifice you make to follow Jesus Christ will be paid back to you 100-fold in true peace, purpose, and spiritual abundance.

What you’ll hear:

The true ordinance of baptism: Burying the old self and being reborn in Christ.

Reading my personal baptism letter written directly to Jesus.

How putting God's word to the test purged a deep-seated addiction in 4 to 6 months.

Trading strip clubs and hookups for late-night prayers with God.

Why making $500k at 22 years old still left me empty and dead inside.

The 100-fold promise: Why surrendering everything to Christ is worth every sacrifice.

If this message spoke to your heart, consider this channel a safe haven for your journey. We are here to bring you the hope, restoration, and real-life tools found only in Jesus Christ.

In this deeply personal and transparent episode, I open up and share in full depth my raw story about the miraculous redemption of Jesus Christ.

From a very young age, I was met with immense inner turmoil and intrusive thoughts. At 13 years old, I was exposed to pornography for the first time, sparking a deep and destructive 14-year addiction. At that exact same time, I realized I was struggling with same-sex attraction—a heavy thorn in my side that I had no idea how to navigate while being told by the world that it was who I was.

I open up about the darkest periods of my life, including using toxic coping mechanisms, getting married and divorced, falling back into the abyss of depression, and eventually fantasizing about ending my life. I even share the terrifying night I felt so abandoned by God that I literally prayed to and worshiped the devil.

But a total rock bottom became the exact foundation I needed to finally rebuild my identity strictly on the Word of God. I want to talk about the radical difference between who I was and who I am now as an entirely new creature walking in His abundant life.

What you’ll hear:

Living a double life: Leadership on the outside vs. hidden darkness on the inside. 

The 14-year battle with pornography addiction and same-sex attraction starting at age 13.

The reality of deep inner turmoil and crying myself to sleep as a teenager.

The dangerous timeline of escalation: How pornography leads straight to the gates of hell.

Spiritual warfare: Facing literal demonic attacks while trying to find the light again.

The blueprint to freedom: The exact morning routine and fasting structure that purged the lust from my heart.

If you found yourself in my story today, please know you don't have to walk through the darkness alone. This podcast is dedicated to providing you with the community you need to find true freedom. 

In this episode, Wes shares his deeply moving, raw journey of surviving severe internal pain, isolation, and a near-fatal choice.

From the outside, Wes’s life had milestone achievements—including walking on to play Division 1 college football at BYU. But internally, he was dealing with deep-seeded anger, resentment, and the trauma of growing up in a broken home. He opens up completely about the perfect storm of relationship betrayal, intense family conflict, and academic stress that drove him to a Provo Temple parking lot, where he shot himself in the chest.

Wes talks about the exact millisecond reality set in, the absolute miracle of a bullet narrowly curving around his heart by just three millimeters, and the immediate internal shift that wiped away any suicidal thoughts forever.

This conversation highlights a heavy reality that many of us face but rarely discuss openly: the dangerous trap of carrying a massive backpack of shame instead of leaning into the truth. Wes explains what began to change for him, how he learned to view his deepest afflictions through an eternal perspective, and why choosing to surrender your pain to Jesus Christ is the ultimate step toward true redemption and a whole new light.

What you’ll hear:

Navigating the underlying trauma and lack of security that comes from a broken home.

The hidden danger of sacrificing your own healing trying to "rescue" someone else.

An unfiltered account of Wes’s suicide attempt and the exact millisecond his perspective flipped.

The medical miracle of a bullet missing his heart by three millimeters.

The critical difference between life-destroying shame and constructive guilt.

Why true greatness as a man is found in absolute submissiveness to Christ.

If anything in this episode resonates with you, The Matt Richardson Podcast is a place to find support, tools, and guidance.