READ: 2 CORINTHIANS 5:17; GALATIANS 5:16-18; JAMES 1:3-5

For most of my youth, being mature was all the rage. Everyone pretended to be mature. My conception of what that meant was not laughing at sexist and inappropriate jokes, portraying a cooler version of myself, and pretending not to be boy-obsessed while also knowing everything about dating, boys, sex, and love. I wanted to be admired and included among my peers, but deep down I knew my knowledge and experience were insufficient.

Meanwhile, I pondered what maturity in Christ truly meant. I rarely heard it mentioned, except when it was used to criticize or condemn someone else. When I turned twelve, I developed a deeper longing for a relationship with God. I wanted my life to be a sweet aroma to Him. Yet, I got caught up putting up a front. I was the “good church girl,” smiling when I should, being gracious, kind, sweet, and mature. That would make God want me, right?

Yet, what I truly desired was sin. Taking revenge. Being sassy and rude. Lusting for every boy I wanted with no care. In reality, my “maturity in Christ” was only a mask—a pretty snug one. Inwardly, I was a sinner. God didn’t care for the good things I tried to do. They were filthy coverings before a holy God.

What Jesus desires is a humble and contrite spirit. He took our sins upon Himself when He died on the cross so we could be dead to sin and His Holy Spirit could live in us. Through Christ’s death and resurrection, we are forgiven, made alive, and given eternal life—a life where we can have the mind of Christ and be led by His Spirit.

I came to realize that He made me a new creation, so I could reflect the faithful nature of God. His plan was to strip the covering of dead works in my life. In time, my words no longer contained dirty hidden meanings. My actions began to be modeled after the works that Jesus did. Through the Holy Spirit, my life is becoming a genuine reflection of Jesus Christ. • Estelle Cardriche

• In what ways have misconceptions led you to try to do good things to make God want you? The truth is, God knows everything about us, and He already loves us—so much so that Jesus died and rose again to forgive us and bring us near to Himself! And He is eager to help us grow in true maturity as we seek Him. (If you want to dig deeper, read Psalm 51:17; Isaiah 64:6; 66:2; John 17:3; Romans 6:1-18; 1 Corinthians 2:16; 2 Corinthians 2:15; Ephesians 2:8-10; Titus 2:14; James 4:6.)

I have been crucified with Christ, and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I now live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me. Galatians 2:20 (CSB)