Conscious or unconscious, the belief we have about ourselves is rooted in our life experiences, our relationships, and what was modeled for us. Self-sabotage is no different. Consciously or unconsciously, we make decisions that are driven by our emotions which are triggered by our thoughts and attached to what we believe about ourselves. As you move forward with building a relationship with yourself, give yourself the gift of grace, kindness, and acceptance which produces self-love and self-worthiness.

Emotions and feelings are strong and bold and provide us with much-needed information about who we are, what we want, and how to move. However, if not properly identified or managed, they can become like runaway trains out of control. No matter how much you try and control them, they will pick up excessive speed causing great damage. During this podcast and blog, I will be addressing what are emotions and feelings and the importance of them building a healthy relationship with Me, Myself, and I. Let 2023 be the year that you build a healthy relationship with yourself and connect with other relationships that can honor the whole of you.

Building a healthy relationship with oneself is a direct barrier to people pleasing. People pleasing is a belief that others’ needs and wants are more important than one’s own needs resulting in a disconnection from self. As we move into the holiday season, remember that you are just as important as others you may encounter during the holiday season. Remember to be good to yourself and know that only one of you exists.

Trauma bonds are relationships that are built through unhealthy hormonal attachments that produce pain and hurt that create a false definition of safety, love, and trust connected to repeated abuse.  Whether with family members, friends, or strangers, trauma bonds separate you from the original you.  Being that trauma is trapped in the body based on an out-of-body experience, a connection to oneself can become lost creating a false sense of safety, love, and trust in self.

Trauma is an emotional response to distressing events that alters the original you. When experienced through one incident or multiple incidents, trauma creates a disconnection from the original you and becomes trapped in your body. Leaving you struggling to build a healthy relationship with yourself. Whether it is a lack of safety or trust, trauma can affect many parts of you causing healthy development to become impaired.

Anxiety does not mean you are not equipped, but that you need additional information. Anxiety is born when our brain does not have enough information to accurately predict the outcome of a situation in the present or future. Without accurate information, fear is introduced resulting in the brain being alert that a behavior must be implemented to maintain safety. For this reason, the outcome of building a relationship with ourselves is skewed and affected due to having limited or lacking identified information surrounding who we are

Trust is the cornerstone of any relationship, especially the one you have with yourself.  If you have not established or defined trust for yourself, how do you measure it in your relationships? When trust is not demonstrated in healthy relationships or identified on your own, it can become skewed.  MMI gives insight into what trust and a lack of trust produces.  Remember, your definition of trust is your measuring stick for all relationships.  

Identifying safety and unsafety in relationships is an important part of sustaining, maintaining, and participating in relationships.  The same is true for you.  Understanding how you view yourself through a lens of safety and unsafety can open door to how you move forward with seeing and building a relationship with yourself. 

Relationships can be beautiful, loving, exciting, and challenging at the same time.  Often, when challenged, we struggle to build and maintain a healthy relationship with ourselves.  During episode #2, we will be discussing what are some of the challenges to building a healthy relationship with yourself.  Those challenges can be value, biases, trauma/pain, comparison, grief, and resentment.

Having a relationship with yourself is the cornerstone of all your relationships. However, identifying and establishing a healthy relationship with you does not always happen, leading to isolation, loneliness, anxiety, and uncertainty. The episode “Why is the importance to have a relationship with yourself? will assist you in identifying your strength as you implement the keys to building safety, trust, stability, acceptance, patience, and love. Together, the 6-keys offer you the freedom to see your originality.