In this unfortunately titled episode, Kevin and Tony explain why, however bold the Bold are, Mold always wins out in the end because it’s, well, mold. Whether the mold has a shiny green sheen or a crumbly black quality, even the boldest get moldy. But we don’t want to give away the ending. The show’s first segment is “Tony and Kevin Invite Your Mom to Breakfast” because breakfast is the most important meal of the day if you want to start the day bloated. Learn how easily your Mom can be lured

Tony and Kevin decide that since England gets a Scotland, the New America is entitled to one as well, so they choose Canada. Canadians waste their time receiving affordable health care all day, and likewise hey waste all their natural resources by failing to exploit them. Best for Canadians to hand over the reins to their overlords in the New America, our hosts conclude. The episode segments start off with the return of “Life Lessons with Oswald Spellman.” Indulging in “pleasures not available

It’s that late-winter, consumerist hit holiday again, Valentine’s Day, and naturally our thoughts turn to our love for mollusks. As clams and whelks press their horrid little bodies against your ankles with hopes of being your Valentine, listen to the wisdom of Tony and Kevin in order to learn how to shake them off without offending them. Today’s show is all about the love of mollusks, starting with the classic “One on One Couples Therapy” with Doctor Mike. Let’s face it, the need for couples

Tony and Kevin amuse themselves by exploring the prankster’s etiquette for handing out subpoenas. Their advice: it’s better to give than to receive. To give even more, they take us to the first segment, “Lower Heights Recycling and Curbside Healing,” where we learn how dispose of Christmas effluence (fruitcakes, etc.) in a way that no one but your neighbor will object to. Next, they take us to episode 3 (but the 4 th in the sequence) of the “Schmalkaldic League,” for more history/myth/lies about

Kevin kvetches about why “Men in Charge” cedes so much time to CHAOS, the science program that’s mainly there to let you know all the ways nature has your number, and Tony reassures him that he has found it “personally profitable” to make such deals unilaterally. Just back from some time served at the behest of Interpol in Great Britain, CHAOS host Anders Lurkawhile introduces the viewers to his “girl-friend,” Enid Hackney-Grubbe. Anders and Enid thrill to “In the Field” with “Spurious Jack”

First, Tony and Kevin avoid the topic of “Exemptions for Small Hands” by considering what Sulu and Chekhov really kept in that locked cabinet between their stations on the Enterprise bridge. It’s what you’d expect, perhaps. But then, what chores should the Small-Handed be spared, given that the noise of their personalities is compensatory? Should the small hands be kept away from chainsaws and buttons that are too big? Do the small handed deserve an extra scoop of ice cream and someone to open

For the first time in recorded prehistory, Kevin and Tony lug the Men in Charge Portable Recording Unit, contained in three Mitsubishi Minivans, to record out of the studio. They set up shop at the Unhappy Childhood Festival at the Lower Heights Convention Center, where they are promptly ignored by everyone who attends, probably because of their “Deep State”-required nametags. They do introduce four segments, the first of which is “Professional Housesitters,” in which Tony and Kevin lay out the

Kevin begins this episode by describing what it was like living next door to kids who were raised by hamsters, and the dangers these kids posed while “foraging” on the bus. Then, to unclump our mental sawdust, we move on to another chapter of “Johnny Hambone, Library Bouncer,” in which Johnny attends an academic conference on Library Bouncerdom. He scowls, drinks with a sputtering old flame from graduate school, and finally has a bit of a fracas over his name tag. And yes, we use the breaking

This episode, the typical jocular beginning of the episode, banter, is replaced by a revolutionary new idea…oh, wait, it’s just banter. But scintillating and—dare we say—titillating banter? After all, this is “City of Steves”! Our first sketch is “Tales from the Profane Calliope,” hosted by Bay Radbury, and it’s our first Men in Charge radio sketch in black and white! This particular tale is the nail-chilling and bone-biting “What Were You Smelling in the Year 2000?” After that, our sponsor, the

Tony and Kevin remonstrate with the audience for their lack of research ahead of each episode. Notably, the Listener probably is unable to insert either “cavalcade” or “lipids” into their cocktail party badinage, or even “badinage,” for that matter. First up is Jimmy Stewart, Presidential Press Secretary. Mr. Stewart comes out of retirement, and the grave, to tell the public what it’s like to work for the President in the New America. And he does. He certainly does. Next is a word from our