Daisy shares her experience of a cryptic pregnancy and how her and her partner had just 2 months to prepare for parenthood.
Christie: Hi Daisy, thank you so much for joining us today. Do you want to introduce yourself and your family?
Daisy: Hi, I’m 24 and I live in London and last year I had a cryptic pregnancy. I have a 10-month-old daughter now.
Christie: We came across your Instagram after your chat on BBC women’s hour where you discussed your cryptic pregnancy. Can you explain what this is?
Daisy: Like many people I did not know what it was and had never heard of it before, it’s quite rare and doctors are not used to seeing it really. A cryptic pregnancy is where a woman does not know she is pregnant for 20 weeks or further. In my case it was 30 weeks which is very far into a pregnancy. People can also suddenly give birth and not have known they were pregnant.
Christie: How did you find out?
Daisy: I was working in central London, living a busy lifestyle was feeling completely myself, I couldn’t tell you one thing that was different about the way I felt. I was on birth control as well so it was not a question in my mind that I could be pregnant.
One day I came back from work after a super busy day and was just lying on my bed and I felt the strangest feeling and would describe it as if there was an alien in my stomach. It was so out of the blue; I didn’t think I was pregnant at first. I didn’t tell anyone as I was so gobsmacked. It was very late at night and I did not have a pregnancy test at all. So, I just went to sleep and thought I would deal with this in the morning and see if it continues. The next morning on my way to work I brought 3 pregnancy sticks. I still didn’t tell anyone, not even my boyfriend as I didn’t want to freak him out if it was nothing. I went to work that day and took the 3 pregnancy tests throughout the day and they all came back with one very strong line and one very faint line and I didn’t know what this meant. I went back to my desk to know what this meant and read that no matter how faint the second line is, your definitely pregnant. I was then very freaked out and had no clue how far along I was.
I then called up the doctors for an emergency appointment and at this point I had still not told anyone. I was trying to sleep that night but kept worrying how far along I was as I realised the baby was basically doing somersaults. I was googling it and it said you don’t feel movement in your stomach till you’re at least 6 months pregnant. I went to the doctors the next day and they asked me if I hadn’t realised my bump. I thought I was just putting on a bit of weight. They then did an ultrasound and confirmed I was 30 weeks pregnant!
Christie: Oh my goodness! What was your first reaction when you first saw the positive pregnancy test
Daisy: It was a complete shock and denial. I had been on the pill and was unaware of the thought of being pregnant. It was much younger than I would have chosen to be a mum.
Christie: How did your boyfriend react?
Daisy: I was so scared to tell him, it felt like re living that first reaction all over again. We had spoken about having kids but not for 5/6 years down the line. I told my mum first of all and shouted down the phone that I needed her help. I kept saying to her how do I tell him; I can’t tell him. I texted him saying can you come and see me at the end of the day, I need to tell you something. He came to my house and I got him to stay in the car. I got in his car and I explained the whole thing and ended it by saying so yeah were going to have a baby in 2 months’ time. He literally looked like a deer in headlights and didn’t know what to say. He then came into my house and my mum calmed him down. He was much more calm and ready than I was for a long time. I was so lucky that I had such a supportive partner and still do.
I would work during the week and then each weekend we would do something to prepare ourselves like buying a pram, buying a cot. With an impromptu baby shower as I well I suddenly had everything you need for a new baby. We were meant to move into a flat 2 weeks after I found out I was pregnant, but we pulled out of this and I decided to stay at home. We crammed everything in quickly and it was not too stressful.
Christie: How did your family and friends react?
Daisy: I was so lucky, there was nobody that was angry or rude to me. It is a crazy story to tell but I got such an outpour of support from everyone. My mum is my rock and has been so good to me. My partners family were amazing as well.
Christie: That is incredible, we’ve seen a couple of other cases of cryptic pregnancies on social media where people haven’t been the kindest to them. Have you received any form of criticism over your cryptic pregnancy?
Daisy: In my personal life, I have had 99% support from everyone. I know there are some people that talk about me about the pregnancy, and I don’t blame them I would have lots of questions if it was someone else. I want to put my story out there and explain how this can happen, I’m keen to spread awareness. Since putting my story out, I’ve seen strangers comment “As if this happened, you’re lying”, and you just think they were not there, and have no idea what happened.
Christie: You mentioned your pregnancy was very smooth and that caused you not to notice the pregnancy. Did you have any complications with the birth?
Daisy: In my first scan they said the baby was very healthy. At one point they did think my baby could have had down syndrome because she had a big head and short legs. But I thought she would be fine as I’m a short girl myself so I thought my baby would have short legs. When they took further tests, they found the baby did not have down syndrome. The doctors were finding it hard to estimate a due date since they were not able to track my last period. They had to measure the baby by the baby’s head.
When it came to my due date it came and went, I did not have any symptoms of labour. I then was induced a few days later. For a long time during my labour, they couldn’t find her heartbeat which was stressful. After a day of being in labour they told me to have an emergency C- Section and when she came out her cord was wrapped round her next twice and that I was right she was probably about 3 weeks younger than the doctors thought. I then stayed in hospital for a few days to help her put on weight.
Christie: looking back, what do you wish you now know
I didn’t know how strong the connection would be that I would have with the baby. I thought I would be back at work within a month of being off. I had no idea that I was going to become unbelievably obsessed and have so much love for the baby. Now I’ve gone back to work and in the office it’s a lot harder than I ever thought.
Christie: Thanks so much for sharing your story!
