MercyCast

Many people who leave the church cite "church hurt" as one reason. What is it?

In this episode of the Mercycast, host Raleigh Sadler discusses the topic of church hurt with the author Joe Dobbins. Together, they explore the experiences of individuals who have been emotionally wounded in places of worship and the impact it has on their faith. Joe shares his motivation for writing the book Hope After Church Hurt: How to Heal, Reengage, and Rediscover God's Heart for You and highlights the need to address the issue of church hurt within faith communities. They discuss the various forms of church hurt, including judgmentalism, wounding with words, rejection, disappointment with toxic leaders, and even sexual abuse. Joe emphasizes the importance of recognizing and labeling the specific hurts individuals have experienced to begin the healing process. They also discuss the role of forgiveness, releasing pain to Christ, and restoring God's authority over one's pain as essential steps toward healing. In this conversation, Joe Dobbins and Raleigh explore three critical steps in healing: restoring God's authority, releasing pain to Christ, and refusing to carry resentment. They emphasize the importance of reframing our stories and seeing our experiences help others. They also discuss the challenges of reengaging with the faith community and offer advice on setting boundaries and finding a healthy church. If you have faced church hurt or know someone who has, please consider listening to this episode.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Church hurt is a real and significant issue that many people have experienced, leading to feelings of being unsafe in a place where they should feel safe.
• Recognizing and labeling the specific hurts individuals have experienced is essential to beginning the healing process.
• Restoring God's authority over one's pain, releasing pain to Christ, and choosing to forgive are essential steps toward healing.
• Churches and pastors should be trauma-informed and create a safe and supportive environment for those who have experienced church hurt.
• Healing from church hurt is a holistic process that involves addressing the emotional, psychological, and spiritual aspects of one's life. It involves restoring God's authority, releasing pain to Christ, and refusing to carry resentment.
• Reframing our stories allows us to find purpose in our pain and use our experiences to help others.
• Reengaging with the faith community requires setting boundaries and taking baby steps to rebuild trust.
• Finding a healthy church involves seeking God's guidance and being open to where His peace leads us.
• God desires to heal and comfort those who have experienced church hurt.
• "Church hurt, experiencing spiritual abuse, really feeling unsafe in a place where we should feel safe? It can be a hard topic to discuss because a lot of us want to pretend that it doesn't happen."
• "Church hurt is so unique... It's one thing to go into the battle and be wounded. It's another thing to retreat to a sanctuary and be wounded."
• "Our story doesn't just stop with us, but it gets redeemed until it helps someone else."
• "Take baby steps, little by little, to reengage with the faith community."

Find everything you need about Joe Dobbins on JoeDobbins.org. Get his new book, Hope after Church Hurt: How to Heal, Reengage, and Rediscover God's Heart for You.

You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh on Twitter and Instagram.

Thanks for listening. We want to hear from you!

Email us at [email protected].

Have you ever lacked Confidence?

In this episode of the Mercycast, host Raleigh Sadler and guest Ashley Henriott, author of the recently released book Confidence is an Inside Job, discuss the topic of Confidence and self-worth. Ashley shares her journey from being a single mom kicked out of her house to becoming a Christ-centered confidence coach. They explore the importance of finding Confidence in God's love and acceptance rather than seeking approval from others. Ashley emphasizes the significance of vulnerability, humility, and contentment in building Confidence. The conversation also touches on learning to love oneself and the role of faith in overcoming self-doubt. In this conversation, Ashley and Raleigh discuss the process of restoration and miracles in the context of personal growth and faith. Ashley shares her journey of finding restoration and miracles in unexpected ways, emphasizing that restoration is not always a happy ending or a Hollywood movie. She highlights the importance of trusting God's choice and unique journey for each individual. They also discuss the role of insecurities and how God can use them for growth and transformation. Ashley encourages listeners to embrace their weaknesses and find Confidence in vulnerability. The conversation concludes with a discussion on self-love and the importance of loving God rather than trying to love oneself.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Confidence comes from recognizing and appreciating one's abilities and qualities.
• True Confidence is not based on outward circumstances but on a deep understanding of God's love and acceptance.
• Vulnerability and humility are essential in building Confidence and connecting with others.
• Contentment, despite circumstances, is a crucial aspect of Confidence.
• Learning to love oneself is a journey that takes time and involves trusting in God's plan and purpose. Restoration and miracles can happen unexpectedly and may not always look like a happy ending.
• Trusting God's choice and embracing one's unique journey is essential for personal growth and faith.
• God can use insecurities for growth and transformation.
• Finding Confidence in vulnerability and embracing weaknesses can lead to personal and spiritual growth.
• Instead of trying to love oneself, focus on loving God and building a relationship with Him.
• "Confidence is being content despite our circumstances."
• "I should be dead, but the Lord just gives me that fresh perspective."
• "The truest, true thing about you is his love for you."
• "Restoration isn't always a happy ending with our family that we cut off. It is just the fact that we cut them off, and we're okay."
• "It has nothing to do with you. It's just genuinely like he chooses you. Do you trust that he chooses you and let that be your drive? You know, what would your life look like?"
• "God will use your insecurities."

Find everything you need about Ashley Henriott on ashleyhenriott.com. Get her brand new book, Confidence is an Inside Job.

You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh on Twitter and Instagram.Thanks for listening. We want to hear from you!

Email us at [email protected]. For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

When you are at the end of your rope, that's when you can grow the most.

Risa August, author of 'The Road Unpaved, Border to Border with a Brain Tumor and a Bike,' shares her journey of resilience and self-discovery after being diagnosed with a brain tumor. Despite the challenges she faced, Risa refused to let her diagnosis paralyze her and instead made a conscious decision to live. Starting with small goals, such as walking to the mailbox, Risa gradually built her strength and confidence. Along the way, she discovers the power of reframing her thoughts and embracing connection with others. Her story is a testament to the transformative power of resilience and the importance of community. Risa August shares her biking experience from Canada to Mexico across Northern Spain on the Camino de Santiago. She discusses her challenges, the support she received, and the mindset shifts she experienced. Risa emphasizes the importance of visualizing success and focusing on the rewards to stay motivated. She also talks about the lessons she learned from these journeys and how they have influenced her everyday life. Risa encourages listeners to embrace challenges, shift their perspectives, and live life fully.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• When faced with a difficult diagnosis or challenge, it's essential to make a conscious decision to live and not let it paralyze you.
• Setting small, measurable goals can help build confidence and momentum in adversity.
• Reframing negative thoughts and focusing on gratitude can shift perspective and foster resilience.
• Embracing connections with others and seeking support can be instrumental in overcoming challenges and finding strength.
• Resilience and self-discovery often go hand in hand, leading to personal growth and transformation. Visualize success and focus on the rewards to stay motivated.
• Embrace challenges and shift your perspective to navigate obstacles.
• Don't limit yourself, and be open to different ways of achieving your goals.
• Learn from every experience and apply the lessons to your everyday life.
• Live life to the fullest and prioritize what feels important to you.
• "When my back is up against the wall, some interesting things can happen."
• "Having all the options taken away from you with your diagnosis was somewhat freeing."
• "I remember focusing on what it would feel like to get to the U.S.-Mexican border, what that would feel like. What would it taste like? What would the food taste like? What would the air smell like? What would the sun feel like on my skin?"

Find everything you need about Risa August on her link tree and get her book here.

You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh on Twitter and Instagram.

Thanks for listening. We want to hear from you!

Email us at [email protected].

Over 50% of Christians struggle with mental health.

For this reason, in this episode of the Mercycast, host Raleigh Sadler engages with Chris Morris, a certified mental health coach and author of the new book Resilient and Redeemed: Lessons about suicidality and depression from the psych-ward to discuss the often overlooked topic of mental health within the church. They share personal stories and insights on addressing mental health concerns within a faith community. They emphasize the need for vulnerability, understanding, and support for those struggling with mental health issues. They also discuss the difference between spiritual maturity and mental health and the importance of holistic care. The conversation highlights the need for open dialogue and creating a safe space for individuals to share their struggles.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• It is essential to talk about mental health in the church and create a safe space for individuals to share their struggles.
• Vulnerability, understanding, and support are crucial for those dealing with mental health issues.
• There is a difference between spiritual maturity and mental health; both should be addressed and supported.
• Mental health discussions are crucial in church communities.
• Vulnerability is often discouraged in church settings.
• 54% of Christians struggle with mental health issues.
• Mental health is a holistic concern, not just spiritual.
• Church leaders can unintentionally perpetuate harmful myths about mental health.
• Positive pastoral support can significantly impact mental health recovery.
• Spiritual maturity does not equate to mental health stability.
• Cognitive reframing is a valuable tool for managing anxiety.
• Building a supportive community is essential for mental health.
• Starting small conversations can lead to deeper connections.
• Holistic care, including physical, emotional, and psychological aspects, is essential for overall well-being.
• Open dialogue and education about mental health can help reduce stigma and promote understanding within the church community.

Find everything you need to know about Chris Morris, including his books, at Chrismorriswrites.com.

You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh on Twitter and Instagram. For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking. Finally, reach out to us at [email protected].

“There’s miracles in the monotony.”

In this episode of Mercycast, host Adsum Try Ravenhill and guest Raleigh explore the profound significance of walking as a metaphor for life and faith. They discuss personal experiences of walking, the concept of pilgrimage, and the importance of community and solitude in life's journey. The conversation emphasizes that walking is not just a physical act but a spiritual practice connecting us to ourselves, others, and the divine. Raleigh shares insights from his recent pilgrimage experiences, highlighting the lessons learned about provision, trust, and the beauty of imperfection.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Walking is a universal act that connects us all.
• Pilgrimage is about intention, not just destination.
• Solitude allows for deep reflection and personal growth.
• Walking with others fosters community and support.
• Everyday life can be a pilgrimage if approached with intention.
• Provision comes in unexpected ways during our journeys.
• Embracing imperfection is key to personal development.
• Walking helps us to slow down and appreciate life.
• The journey is as important as the destination.
• We are all on a pilgrimage, seeking something greater than ourselves.

Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

What doesn’t kill you may make you weaker. And that’s okay.

In this conversation, Raleigh and Adsum Ravenhill discuss the concept of suffering and how it can be used for the good of others. They explore the idea that vulnerability and suffering can bless those around us and that our pain can help others find hope and healing. They also discuss the importance of situating our suffering within a greater story and finding redemption in our experiences. Through personal stories and reflections, they highlight the transformative power of suffering and its role in shaping our faith and relationships. Adsum Try Ravenhill and Raleigh discuss the power of vulnerability and weakness in this conversation. They share personal stories and insights on how suffering and weakness can be used to encourage and bless others. They emphasize the importance of authenticity and transparency and how vulnerability can deepen relationships and create growth opportunities. They also highlight the role of Scripture in providing perspective and hope while suffering.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Suffering can be a blessing to others when we are vulnerable and open about our pain.
• Our suffering can be used for the good of God's people and can bring hope and healing to others.
• We can grow and learn deeply through our pain by situating our suffering within a greater story and finding redemption in our experiences.
• Suffering can strengthen our faith and deepen our relationships with others. Suffering and weakness can be used to encourage and bless others.
• Being vulnerable and transparent deepens relationships and creates growth opportunities.
• Scripture provides perspective and hope while suffering.
• Our weakness is a pathway that connects us to God and others.
• Adversity exposes our true selves and teaches us to care for others.
• Vulnerability is the great equalizer that connects us as human beings.
• "What if our pain actually helped other people?"
• "We struggle with this idea of vulnerability; we struggle with this idea of suffering."
• "The vulnerabilities, the difficulties, the struggles, the burdens, the sufferings that we go through, we often, in fact, usually don't know what they're for, either until afterward or never."
• "It's going to change the trajectory of somebody else's life completely."
• "They need to see how a man of God suffers. They need this example."

Have you enjoyed hearing from Adsum? Feel free follow him on X and to read some of his articles.

Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

I am joined by Shannon Popkin, author, speaker, and podcast host, in this episode. We dive deep and discuss the harmful effects of comparison and how it can hinder our ability to live a fulfilling life. In light of Shannon’s books, Comparison Girl, Lessons from Jesus on Me Free Living in a Measure Up World and the new book Comparison Girl for Teens, Thriving Beyond Measure in a World that Compares, we explore the idea that comparison is not a game, but a strategy used by the enemy to distract and destroy us. The conversation concludes with a discussion on shifting from a me-focused to a me-free mindset, where we focus on pouring ourselves out and lifting others up. We also discuss that our confidence and freedom flow from looking to Jesus and serving others rather than focusing on ourselves. This conversation is for you if you’ve ever compared yourself to anyone else.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Comparison is a strategy used by the enemy to distract and destroy us.
• We fall into the comparison trap daily by hyper-focusing on ourselves and constantly measuring.
• Jesus teaches us that success and greatness in his kingdom differ from the world's standards.
• Shifting from a me-focused to a me-free mindset involves pouring ourselves out and lifting others up.
• When we realize that Christ has already proven everything we couldn't, we no longer have anything to prove.
• Comparison leads to a never-ending cycle of trying to measure up and seeking approval.
• Jesus offers a different way of living, where our confidence and freedom come from serving others and looking to Him.
• Paying attention to the messaging we listen to is crucial, as it can align with Jesus' words or the world's influence.
• Our rewards are not tied to results but to being faithful servants with what we have been entrusted.
• "Comparison is at the root of many of our insecurities."
• "Comparison is a strategy that our enemy uses against us."
• "Comparison holds me back from serving others."
• "And if someone makes fun of you or something doesn't go your way, it's like your skin is being ripped from you."
• "A danger that a lot of us in Christendom face is many of us have made self-loathing a virtue."

Enjoy this episode? Learn more about Shannon at her website. Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

In this episode, we have a podcast inception—yes, a podcast within a podcast. The hosts of the Freely Given podcast join me on the Mercycast. Katie Koplin, author of Encouragement for Motherhood, and Gretchen Ronnevik, author of Ragged, share their perspectives on being comfortable with being uncomfortable. We explore how the gospel meets us in our discomfort and talk about seasons in life and how, because of Christ, discomfort is not permanent or defining. 

 Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Discomfort is not permanent or defining; it is just a season in life.
• Blaming discomfort on the devil is a typical response, but it is essential to consider other factors.
• Having concrete hope in the finished work of Christ can help us navigate discomfort.
• Living in small towns can make it difficult to hide from discomfort but also provides opportunities for authentic relationships.
• The pressure to perform and compare oneself with others can hinder authenticity and joy.
• Resting in Christ's finished work allows us to be true to ourselves and live in freedom. The church often struggles to sit with people in their pain and grief, expecting them to move on quickly.
• Being comfortable with discomfort is necessary to support others in their pain.
• A theology of the cross recognizes the reality of suffering and the need for a savior.
• Compassion and presence are more important than trying to fix someone's pain.
• Learning to discern truth from lies and finding comfort in the grace of Christ can help us be more comfortable with discomfort.
• "Unless you become comfortable with being uncomfortable, then you're going to be really frustrated because life doesn't go the way we want it to."
• "Have you noticed that sometimes anytime we're uncomfortable, it's very easy to immediately blame it on the devil?"
• "It kind of shows us our God of the moment, right? It shows us our functional savior. It's comfort. We want everything to be okay."
• "Every single move they make right now is being done in pain."
• "Assuming that someone should be able to get over something within a specified amount of time exposes that person's underlying assumption that life isn't really as bad as that other person may feel."
• "The people that sit there with me and say, it's not okay. And they offer nothing. They just sit there. I think those people in that moment are modeling the fact that they are comfortable with being uncomfortable."

Have you enjoyed hearing from Gretchen and Katie? You can find their podcast here. Buy Katie’s book, Embracing Motherhood, and Gretchen’s book, Ragged.

Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

Rather than hearing a story this week, I want to pause and talk about the importance of sharing our stories and being vulnerable. Whether you believe it or not, everyone has a story that matters, and our stories have the power to impact others. There is a cost of vulnerability and the need to share with safe people. One of my friends, Adsum Ravenhill, joins me and shares his perspective on vulnerability and pain. Adsum highlights the importance of trusting God and seeing our stories as part of a greater narrative. I hope that you enjoy this extraordinary episode.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Everyone has a story that matters and has the power to impact others.
• Vulnerability comes at a cost and should be shared with safe people.
• Sharing our stories should not be manipulative or self-serving.
• Trusting God and seeing our stories as part of a greater narrative can bring hope and perspective.
• "Your story matters because it impacts other people."
• "When you share your vulnerability with someone, that can change a life."
• "Vulnerability is a gift, a sacrifice, and it's costly."

Have you enjoyed hearing from Adsum? He’ll be back, but until then, feel free to read some of his articles. Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.

Julie Sunne, author of Sometimes I Forget, 60 Reminders of Hope for Your Hard Days, joins me to share her personal experiences of suffering, including miscarriages and caring for her daughter, and how these challenges have deepened her faith. She emphasizes the importance of acknowledging and processing grief and how it can lead to a more intimate relationship with God. Julie also challenges the notion of 'normal' and our expectations of ourselves and others. This conversation discusses the importance of vulnerability and authenticity in our faith journeys. Julie shares how her experiences of suffering and challenges have deepened her faith and made her more compassionate.

Highlights and takeaways from the conversation:

• Suffering is a universal experience that ties all humans together.
• Comparing our pain to others can hinder our ability to process and heal.
• Acknowledging and processing grief can lead to a deeper faith and a more intimate relationship with God.
• The concept of 'normal' is based on expectations and comparisons and can be unhelpful and limiting.
• Vulnerability and authenticity are essential in our faith journeys. We don't have to have it all together; admitting our faults and struggles is okay.
• Suffering and challenges can deepen our faith and make us more compassionate.
• God's attributes, such as sovereignty, love, and faithfulness, can bring hope and comfort in difficult times.
• We must have a community of trusted individuals with whom we can be vulnerable and share our struggles.
• We must let go of our expectations and trust God's plan, even when we can't see the bigger picture.
• Worship music and prayer can be powerful tools for finding comfort and strength in difficult times.
• "I wrote it because I needed it."
• "We all feel alone in those sufferings. We have to know that we're together, that we aren't alone. Not only are we together with one another, we all experience that, but we're also not alone in that God is with us."
• "This whole thing, it's not about me having it all together. It's about God having it all together for me."
• "Our self-esteem is very fragile as people. And that's why we seek so much esteem in other places instead of where we need to, which is in the Lord."

Follow Julie and learn more about her work here. Don’t forget to pick up her book, Sometimes I Forget.

Email us at [email protected]. You can follow MercyCast on Instagram, Twitter, and Facebook.

You can follow Raleigh Sadler on Twitter and Instagram.

For more conversations like this one, check out my book, Vulnerable: Rethinking Human Trafficking.