They say the two hardest things to say in life are hello for the first time and goodbye for the last.

Hi, you’ve called Age & Mitch. And we thought we’d leave you one last Message on the Machine. 

It’s been a wild ride:

2 years

5 seasons

72 episode

Laughs, tears, shocks, triumphs and terrible embarrassments. Sex parties, disrupted bowels, heartbreak, “the ick,” psychic readings, halloween, healthy habits, fetishes, therapy, sex ed, Google histories and LOTS of gay shit.

It’s hard to look back at the last two years of laying all cards on the table and not want to celebrate. So that is exactly what the boys have decided to do. Pour yourself a glass of bubbles for this one because they certainly did.

Our hosts have spent their last hour behind the mics to take stock. Highlights, lowlights, regrets, favourite eps and some never before revealed BTS exclusives just for you gossipy little listeners to enjoy. To round out the show, Age & Mitch take a moment to thank each and every one of you gorgeous listeners that have made this show what it is today. Then thank each other and cry through to the credits.

If this is the first time you’re listening to us then honey, what a joyous many hours you have in your future. If it’s not then know this, we see you, we love you and thank you.

Good luck out there x

#afterthebeep

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Bring. Back. My Girl.

That’s right, with the end in sight, and for the first time in MOTM history Age & Mitch have welcomed back a past guest for another crack at the mics. But not just any guest, oh no. The boys are extremely excited to welcome back close friend of the show and self-professed superstar of the world: Jimi the Kween.

It’s been a hot 20-months since the last time JTK dropped into the studio. So naturally there was a lot to catch up on. From career pivots (ahem, DJ Jimi) to evolving relationships with gender. As a full-time drag queen these days, Jimi had a bit to add in the sequel to her iconic “The Secret Life of Drag” (Episode 22). The boys get the scoop on Drag Race auditions and whether a national drag icon still picks up the occasional prop from Supa Bargains.

On a grittier note, Age and Jimi compare notes on turning 30, a milestone they’ve both hurtled past since last catching up. Turns out it might not be as utterly horrendously terrifying as Mitch seems to believe? The boys also discuss the very topical… um, topic of drag for children and why it is categorically NOT grooming.

All this and a barrel of laughs in what is the penultimate episode of Message on the Machine. Enjoy.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

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Ultimate power has once again been granted to you, the listeners.

That's right, in our final EVER instalment of Your Message, Our Machine, Age & Mitch are giving the power to the people and will be discussing whatever you care to chat about. Until further notice.

In this edition of YMOM, the boys hold nothing back and take a min to get into their feels with the people to reminisce about the great times on the show both behind and away from the mics. They also provide their *expert* opinions on the success of the upcoming and highly-anticipated Sydney World Pride, and read out some farewell messages that you gorgeous people all wrote in.

For our final Confessions on the Machine, one poor girl in particular held nothing back when she completely outed her bestie in retelling what may be the worst date that anyone has ever had. We won’t go into too much detail here but suffice it to say it was a very shitty situation…

All this and more waiting for you after the beep, so go on then. What are you waiting for?

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ring, ring besties. It’s your monthly Catch Up Call on the line.

That’s right, Age & Mitch are back for everyone’s favourite monthly update on the lives of our two hosts and the highly-selective goings-on of the world at large. 

This week for the boys, it’s more Halloween updates, Losing It with one particular DJ in the park and some very, very Wet Bussys.

In current affairs (ie. the current affairs that have grabbed the attention of our two hosts), the world’s richest man is currently running Twitter into the ground and begging strangers for $8? A few of our dearly beloved have passed and Hollywood is FINALLY releasing a gay romcom that isn’t very extremely sad. The boys discuss People’s 2022 Sexiest Man Alive, but are they happy about it? And discuss JK Rowling’s ongoing feud with all that is good and decent in this world.

All of this and so much more jam packed into this bumper ep for your aural pleasure. Hot. All you need to do is press play.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

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Today, we're getting sexy.

This week, Age & Mitch are pulling back the cover on all things fetish. Never ones to shy away from the "taboo," our hosts deep dive into the exciting world of abnormal sexual desire and all that it entails. From feet, to pig play, to BDSM, everything is fair game as these boys would NEVER yuck someone else's yum.

Discussion points include what exactly constitutes a "fetish" and do our hosts have any that that would like to confess? Stigma around fetishes and whether they are more prominent amongst The Gays than their straight counterparts. Some important questions are asked around exploring fetishes with a hookup vs. with a partner and which one is the preference. And of course, this being an educational program Age & Mitch spit some educational facts about this kinky world. Spoiler alert, it seems that the world is crazy about fkn feet...

So slip into your finest gimp suit, lube up and let’s dive in.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

'Tis time for the listener to take back the power.

That's right, this week it’s the latest instalment of Your Message, Our Machine. The episode where you decide whatever the hell Age & Mitch get to talk about. After the big news of last week, the question box was inundated with questions. And fair enough. What has happened? Have they had a falling out? Did Adrian’s new boyfriend cause this rift? All will be revealed in due course.

Speaking of boyfriends, the people want to know how Mitch feels about the new man in Age’s life. What does a co-dependent friendship look like in a peri-boyfriend world?!

All of this and so much more leading up to our fav segment, Confessions on the Machine, where one deranged listener has their confession unpacked live on air for the surprise and delight of our hosts and the world at large. And this one is a goodie. Think mistaken identity, lesbian love, a surprise vegetable and a (somewhat) happy ending. We’ll leave it at that so you can enjoy the boys taking you through all the finer details.

So as always, pour yourselves a little vino. Draw yourself a nice hot bath and settle in for this gorge little ep. Then we’ll see you at the next one.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello dear listeners.

It's us, Age & Mitch in the copy this week, to let you know that while we have curated our usual fun-filled Catch Up Call for you all, it also comes with some slightly sad news. For the full scoop on what's going on with MOTM, give the ep a bloody listen 'cause we'll get that out of the way upfront. Before resuming with your regularly scheduled programming.

Catching up this week, Age has been busyyyyy over the break with the start of a new decade, a new man and a new business all on the agenda. Mitch... has had a slightly less eventful break but we'll let him tell you about that himself. This catch up call is a funny one because the boys had months of headlines to trawl through to bring you the very best of what's been on their mind. Some important things were most likely forgotten, but many things weren't. Of course we would be referring to a certain fallen Monarch, the upcoming Glee docuseries, Frank Ocean's iconiqe cock ring and two foxy morons returning to the small screen. How's that for a roundup?

For all this and more, dive on into the very first Catch Up Call of Season 5! We'll see you at the next one.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hold onto your hats people, because MOTM is back, back BACK AGAIN!

Yes, you read correctly. Your two favourite gay boys are behind the mics for Season 5, and a very important discussion about growing up.

Since our hosts wrapped Season 4, resident old bag Age big adieu to his twenties, while Mitch has remained a beacon of controlled youthful chaos. This gave the boys reason to pause, and consider some of the big questions. What makes an adult? How do you become one? Have we made it yet? When will our good looks begin to fade?

For all the scientific and well-researched answers to these questions (and so much more) dive back into the brand-spanking new season of Message on the Machine and you too might gain some clarity on whether you’ve already left your childhood behind, or if there’s still time to grow the bloody hell up.

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

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Oh em gee, It's the season finale and we're talking about loooooove.

Now I know what you're thinking: what do Age & Mitch know about this delicate, complex human phenomenon? And if you're thinking just about fuck all then you're spot on. Which is why they've called in reinforcements. Joining our hosts in the studio today is acclaimed love, sex and relationships coach Dr. Lurve. (Don't ask her full name because she won't tell you. Hot.)

Nonetheless, this spicy lady holds nothing else back as she unpacks each of the boys' current romantic... situations. In a completely brutal and hilarious style. Beyond that they discuss falling in love, being single, monogamy, polygamy, cheating, the list goes on!

As some of you have realised by now, this is a pretty gay show so of course, conversation turns to relos specifically of the same-sex persuasion. Turns out all the discourse around how it's impossible to date as a gay man is a load of shit and maybe we are, in fact, the problem?

What we all thought would be a hilarious and sexy chat over the mics turned out to be, well, just that. But if you pay attention to what iconic Dr. Lurve has to say you might actually learn something. So whip out your fave vibrator (or don't, no stress) and enjoy our final ep of Season Four. Meanwhile, we are off to go fight for the love we deserve.

Thank you so much for another ripper of a season. Couldn't have done it without each and every one of you crazy binches. Enjoy the time off as a chance to go back and relive some of the classics and we'll be back on the air in two shakes of a... well, you get it.

This episode was brought to you by Sophie Cosmetica.

Check them out at sophiecosmetica.com or on insta @sophie.cosmetica

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ring ring babey, you've called and we've answered.

It is indeed time for another instalment of Your Message, Our Machine. An exclusive opportunity to have your say about the kind of content that hits the ears of our listeners across the globe.

True to form, you've all given Age & Mitch plenty to play with, resulting in another juicy ep that may surprise, delight and shock. Natch. We've had birthday shoutouts for gorgeous friends and romantic love notes to one of our esteemed hosts. Plenty of chatter about the exciting competition with Poof Doof that will be drawn in one short week! If you haven’t entered yet then we don’t even know what to say to you. 

The people want to know what the boys have been watching recently and also ask a very important question; are we, or are we not allowed to say THAT f-word?

In the confessional booth, one listener regales us with a classic tale of losing her v-card. Safe to say that we never thought a bunch of live chickens would play a role in one of these stories, but here we are fam. Have a listen for all the details

Once you've finished the ep, get in early and line up your questions, comments and confessions now for the next time MOTM throws to the people. We're always around to take a message via insta DM or email. (Voice memos obviously encouraged.)

This episode was brought to you by Sophie Cosmetica.

Check them out at sophiecosmetica.com or on insta @sophie.cosmetica

Make sure you're the first one to press play on every message we leave on your machine by following/subscribing on your favourite podcast platform and leaving us a GLOWING review. Then be sure to head to our insta @messageonthemachine to keep up with all our antics on those long days in between. #afterthebeep

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.