Midlife Schmidlife

My guest in this episode of Midlife Schmidlife is New York Times and USA Today's best-selling author, Jane Porter. She's written over 70 romances and women's fiction novels has had 3 of her books turned into Movies of the Week, started a publishing company at forty-in to give writers more opportunities, and now at 58 works placing Tule Publishing stories with film producers.

In our conversation, some highlights we spoke about:

• Jane shares her journey of becoming a writer, including the many times she could have given up but didn't.

• How menopause affected her creativity.

• The shift she made in her career in her 40s and why.

• How women should be supporting one another.

• Her take on being happy (hint - you have to choose it!)

Jane believes you're never too old to reinvent yourself or create the life you want. I know you will love our conversation!

You can learn more about Jane, her books and her publishing company at: JanePorter.com.

Want your own Midlife Ta-da? Join the mailing list by clicking here. You'll receive podcast episode updates, inner circle community invites plus biweekly confidence-boosting motivation. 

I feel quite jealous whenever I hear tales of women striking out on their own and having incredible solo travel adventures. I wonder who I would be without the thoughts of not being courageous enough or hurting someone else's feelings for a desire to travel alone. 

Today's guest encourages other women to embark on their solo travel journeys. Yolanda DeLoach finds empowerment and peace in solo travel, camping, and hiking. Her schedule as a hospice/palliative care nurse enables her to have long stretches off to pursue travel and hiking. 

In the spring of 2021, she became a Thousand Miler after spending a year section hiking the nearly 1,200-mile Ice Age National Scenic Trail in Wisconsin. On long road trips, she enjoys sleeping in her truck, Fiona, and searching for free places to camp. One of her all-time favorite places is Isle Royale National Park in Lake Superior, where she has done solo backpacking. The solo travel experience is exhilarating and offers great capacity for personal growth. She encourages women who want more solo experiences to start in a comfortable place: a walk in a local park, a day trip to a neighboring town, or camping at a familiar campground. Currently, Yolanda is writing a memoir about reclaiming her spirit while section hiking the Ice Age Trail.

She shares her advice to women in midlife: "Don't be afraid to try things solo. The most common response women say when they hear about my solo adventures is, "I wish I could do something like that!" You can! Take small steps."

You can connect with Yolanda on Facebook at:

https://www.facebook.com/autumnyearshiker

And Instagram: 

https://www.Instagram.com/autumnyearshiker

Yolanda's Bonnie & Clyde story that is mentioned in this episode can be found here: https://www.facebook.com/autumnyearshiker/posts/pfbid03HoCzfSDpr94K9ED9eh3FWCdEKu72m7KUVhyGgeJkBy7f8MEd8kezeS3BKbqBD8dl

Yolanda is one of my few guests who is not an entrepreneur. And I love her spirit and courage for wanting to be on the podcast! I'd also love to hear YOUR story and share it with the Midlife Schmidlife listeners. So head to https://www.midlifeschmidlife.com/guest, and let's get you on the show!

Thanks to Goli Nutrition for asking me to be a partner! You can save 10% on your order by clicking through https://go.goli.com/lizapplegate or using promo code: LizApplegate

Ready to reclaim the meaning of fitness in midlife?

Let me intorduce you to Cheryl Whitelaw a Move More Without Regrets coach, teacher, and CEO of Peace and Power Movement Services. She supports her clients to learn through their movement through body-based coaching, Mindful Movement classes, and hands-on work to support the functional activity. Her clients share a desire to live with vitality, keep going as they age, and often recover from life-changing conditions like MS, Fibromyalgia, or brain injuries. She found true joy in movement when she started training aikido at age 46. Currently, she is preparing for her black belt test.

We have a deep and meaningful convo about fitness in midlife, war, social injustice, power and peace in this impactful episode.

You can find out more about Cheryl and free monthly online workshops at https://www.kindpower.ca/awareness-through-movement-classes/

Cheryl is also offering 5 free online discovery sessions for Midlife Schmidlife listeners to help them learn how to move more efficiently with less stiffness or discomfort. https://app.acuityscheduling.com/schedule.php?owner=16538138&appointmentType=29112047

We are continuing with the series “Reclaiming Midlife.” This episode’s question before we join today’s conversation…how would your life be different if you accepted and celebrated all of who you are? 

Think about that for a minute. 

All the “flaws” you feel you have and are magnified in how you see yourself. While all of your gifts are downplayed. All the areas where you have been successful or are proud of that you brush away. Everything you’ve gone through that has led you to where you are…

What if, instead of thinking it was no big deal - you thought “Hot damn, I’m pretty amazing!” 

Sadly, we’ve been taught to not get too big for our britches. Or that bragging isn’t nice. That being boastful makes you arrogant. 

I have a theory that comments like “don’t get too big for your britches” is what I call a “good girl rule.” We learned this as a child as a way to fit into the proper box of being acceptable as a woman. And here we are, over 40 and still living by those standards. 

My friends, you can claim your brilliance without being a jerk. You can be confident in who you are as a person and not belittle others. In fact, by claiming yourself, you are giving permission for other women to do the same. You can point out your daughter’s, sister’s or friend’s magic and celebrate that for them so they can then see it in themselves. 

And I think that’s one of the amazing attributes today's guest brings to the show. 

Kim Romain is a holistic life & business strategist helping busy professionals move from chaos to clarity in their work and life. For years (decades, even), she thought there was something wrong with her because she couldn't settle on the "one thing" she was "meant to do" in this lifetime. She had 11 different undeclared and 5 different declared majors in college and has had 6 major career changes (not just job shifts) since then. When she was introduced to the concept of being a multi-passionate individual, she felt like she was finally able to breathe.

Clearly someone who doesn't like to settle for one things at a time, Kim describes herself as an artist, theater-geek and D&D enthusiast, who is deep into the practice of meditation and mindfulness, loves playing the violin, working with her crystals and Oracle cards and will jump at any opportunity to whip up culinary delights in the kitchen or plan a super fun party with all the bells and whistles.

Head over to the show notes to find direct links to connect with Kim online, previous Midlife Schmidlife episodes mentioned in this conversation as well as a photo of a dessert that Kim shares in our conversation. 

We are kicking off a new series, "Reclaiming Midlife." The concept was inspired by a meme I saw on Facebook - It's of the Golden Girls side by side with the characters of the Sex in the City reboot, And Just Like That. The meme lets us know that both shows' characters are the same age. Head to the show notes to see the meme.

My mind started swirling around when I saw this. First, there was disbelief. Then, there was shock and horror. Then, finally, there was an acceptance that we've come a long way, baby! But also how we still have a long way to go. 

And I believe that the journey of reclaiming starts with ourselves. And reclaiming midlife is both literal and figurative - why do we have such an aversion to the word "midlife?" This podcast is midlife Schmidlfie, all based on what the term implies. And figuratively, how are you choosing to show up during this time? Are we embracing who we are now? Or are we living in the past? When was the last time you asked yourself what's important to you now? Are you settling into a career that no longer suits you? Have you dreamed of having more in your life - only to feel guilty?

It's time we claimed this time in our lives! And hey, I'm always open to a new word to describe where we are, so if you have any suggestions, please let me know!

And speaking of reclaiming, I have another podcast suggestion for you! The concept of a woman "circling the drain" conjures up negative imagery for some. But for the hosts of Circling the Drain Podcast, they've heard this phrase used so many times about perimenopause, menopause, and the plight of the aging woman that they've chosen to reclaim and repurpose the term in the spirit of humor.

Co-hosts and longtime friends Ellie and Julia take a deep dive into the sometimes embarrassing, often hilarious, and always bewildering issues of hormonal changes in midlife. Through honest accounts, thoughtful interviews, and group panel discussions, their mission is to make you chuckle, nod your head in recognition, and hopefully make some scientific progress!

Their episode from March 30th, My Face is Falling, is with a board-certified family nurse practitioner and certified aesthetic nurse specialist. Their convo is all about botox, injectables, and filler. I learned so much! And it shifted my view of what I'm willing to explore for myself. The best part? I laughed my ass off the whole time while listening. 

Tune into Circling the Drain Podcast, every other Wednesday. Wherever you get your podcasts. Seriously, be sure to go and subscribe. 

Now back to Midlife Schmildfte, my guest for today's show is Grace Howes. Grace and I have many similar life experiences and do identical work supporting women over 40 with their business mindset. And I've been very fortunate to know Grace through the Courageous Living Coach Certification. So we've even met in person! And our conversation in today's show makes it feel like yesterday. In fact, we were just talking about reclaiming midlife, and neither of us realized we had started the podcast conversation! So it's a good thing; I had hit the record button early. 

Grace believes that women can achieve anything at any time and that her age should never be a factor. It was only in her early 40s after she started her 1st business when she realized that JOY was hers to have (she always thought she needed permission). However, that doubt didn't need to be her constant sidekick.

You can find Grace on Instagram and Facebook at @kgracehowes. And since recording this conversation, Grace started her podcast for women in biz, Brave, Bold, and Badass. Here are ways you can connect with her:

https://www.kgracehowes.com/podcast

https://www.instagram.com/kgracehowes/

Are you ready to reclaim midlife? Let's drop into the conversation that I had with Grace. 

So I'm holding to the boundary I promised myself, and I hope you'll do the same. Remember, it's okay to change your mind. It's okay to say no, and it's more than okay to hold a boundary. 

Join me next week, April 19, 2022, for the new season, Reclaiming Midlife, with my guest Grace Howes. 

Today’s conversation is with my guest Kerstin Martin, a leading SquareSpace Expert and Calm Business Educator who helps entrepreneurs simplify their business tech with the all-in-one SquareSpace platform.

Kerstin also publishes the popular Eule Planner®, an analog business planner specifically designed for digital entrepreneurs. As an HSP and empath Kerstin’s approach to teaching and running an online business is calm and gentle, with a focus on delivering high quality content, service and training. She advocates and practices kindness, integrity and inclusivity. Kerstin is originally from Germany and lives in the Pacific Northwest with her American husband, fluffy grey cat 'Stinky', and their plane 'Ginger.'

Best of all? Kerstin started her business in her 50's.

We talk about the natural evolution of becoming an “accidental entrepreneur” and how Kerstin likes to be open to new opportunities by living by trial and error. She tries something new with the attitiude that is it doesn't work, she can try something else. This has led to having a 6-figure business without all the hype and hustle. I can’t help but notice how Kerstin creates what she needs and then shares it with her audience.

You can connect more with Kerstin at kerstinmartin.com and on Instagram at instagram.com/kerstinmartin

Interested in Human Design? Find out more here: https://www.jovianarchive.com/

We mention Susannah Conway a few times. She is amazing and you can find here: https://www.susannahconway.com/

This is the last episode in the “How they got started,” series. The upcoming series “Reclaiming Midlife” begins on April 12, 2022. This next series was inspired by the meme that recently circulated of the Golden GIrls and the Sex in the City roboot, “And just like that…” actors side by side, shocklingly letting us know the characters were the same age. I was in total shock so had to check and yep…Dorothy stated she was 55 in the very first episode of the Golden Girls.

Head over to the show notes on the website to catch a glimpse of the meme. https://www.midlifeschmidlife.com/podcast/episode-46.

Finally, If you don’t know my story, after starting my first business as a virtual assistant & online business manager at age 47, left my 9-5 18 months later and became a coach at age 49 and shifted my business around that new-found passion/purpose. I then in 2016, started this podcast when I was 50. I honestly feel that I came into my own in midlife. Since then, helping women in the "middle years" has been dear to my heart.

I often say how you don’t need to be in business for this podcast but many of you have reached out to me wanting to know more about becoming an entrepreneur. I'm considering creating a group program to help you do just that.

Not only will we be setting up the basics for your business, you’ll learn what’s really needed, what’s not -  we will also look at your business idea and get clear on what you are offering. And most importantly, we are going to look at developing your entrepreneur mindset. I always say that besides parenting, there is no greater growth opportunity than starting and growing a business. And having a successful business is less about strategy and more about the inner work that needs to be done.

You can be just starting your biz idea or maybe you have a business and feel the foundational pieces need support. Whether it’s a side-gig, a passion project or maybe you eventually would like to be a full time entrepreneur - they all need to start with a good base and this program will help you do just that within a community of other women doing the same. 

If you'd be interested in learning more, click here to add your name on the list and will be hearing from me soon. I will also be reaching out for your input! I'd love to hear where you need the most support and how this program can help. 

Something for the very first time? Like taking a class learning a new skill or hobby. Something that takes you out of your comfort zone and puts you back in the beginner's mindset.

I have a theory that our confidence plummets when we quit actively learning. And this week's guest, Diane Diaz, feels the same. 

Diane is a speaking coach and personal brand strategist. She loves working with women to help them find their unique voice and build their personal brand and thought leadership through speaking. Nothing makes her happier than seeing other women step into their power, tell their stories, and make a bigger impact.

She loves seeing women's confidence and seeing more and more women move into positions of power and influence in our world in companies, on boards, and in political office. More women in positions of influence and power, please! :-)

In our conversation, Diane shares how learning to swim in her late 30s catapulted her confidence into many new experiences. From starting a new career to competing in the Florida Ironman Triathlon in her 40s, and so much more.

We are making our way through the "How They Got Started" series, and Diane's story is one to inspire you to get out of your comfort zone. 

Be sure to connect with Diane:

LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/dianediaz/

Website: https://www.speakingyourbrand.com/

Hey Schmidlifers. I have a question for you: when was the last time you listened to your Inner Wise Woman, aka your Inner Knowing, in other words, your intuition?

She is the one who whispers to take a new route home, and you later find out there was a bad car accident on your usual route. Or she whispers that a particular person gives you the creeps, so you steer clear. She is also gut-feeling when a new opportunity feels right (even if it's a bit scary). If we listen hard enough, we can hear her whisper about what we really want. 

And I do mean whisper. Because most often, we've drowned out her voice with our very loud inner critic or who I call the inner mean girl. That constant chatter about how you aren't good enough, smart enough, etc.

Which by the way, you ARE good and intelligent enough. That inner chatter is formed out of fear, our lizard brain hard at work keeping you safe. 

Our intuition? She is patient, but we need to learn to turn up her volume, listen to what she says and honor her suggestions. 

And that brings me to today's guest, Marianne de Kleer. She is a Canadian ex-pat living in the French countryside. Her intuition told her precisely what she REALLY wanted in the early stages of her career - but she took the way that most of us do…she chose what seemed like the practical choice. 

You will learn that Marianne is a certified Sophrologist and holistic wellness facilitator working in both English and French. Marianne helps women in their middle years avoid burnout, reduce stress, and boost confidence through Sophrology, a popular mind-body technique in Europe. In her holistic wellness mentoring, she encourages her clients to find their anchors: the things that bring them back to feeling their best.

From mindful walking prompts in her Creative Walking Tours to guided meditation recordings and feeling trackers, she loves to share the contents of her toolbox so that everyone can move into a vibrant way of living, full of ease.

You can find links to connect with Marianne on the links below: 

https://www.mariannedekleer.com/

https://www.mariannedekleer.com/a-year-of-creative-walking-tours/

https://insighttimer.com/mariannedekleer

https://www.instagram.com/mariannedekleer/

I hope this conversation inspires you to tune into your own intuition and follow those "maybe someday" dreams.

This week's podcast guest is Valerie Albarta. Valerie is an author, a blogger and podcaster at Midlife-a-Go-Go, a speaker, a TedX Charlotte presenter, and is working on another novel. She is a kick-ass woman. Despite her diagnosis in 2020, Valerie continues to show up and inspire us to do the same.

A little over a year ago, she was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis at age 57. "It's been a difficult journey filled with unexpected dips and turns, but I continue to navigate life as best as I can. The good days far outnumber the bad days, so I hold onto that."

We continue in the series "How They Got Started," and in our conversation, Valerie shares her journey from starting a blog, a podcast, and shy she has taken a step back to focus on her novel. Her story is a reminder to focus on what is important and make time for your passions.

When I asked Valerie to describe herself, this is what she offered:

Valerie is a woman who wants to steer clear of sounding cliche at all costs. But honestly, I love midlife women. My concern is I don't want us to be pushed aside by the emerging population. I think we're fabulous and offer so much to society.

I'm trying to offer hope, inspiration, and motivation by sharing what I do. Am I the best midlife cheerleader around? Probably not. But I like what I do, and I love why I do it. Midlife is hard. But look at how we're handling it!

And like many midlife women, I, too, have my challenges. Everyone has a bit of a sob story to tell, and I know I'm no different. But unfortunately, my challenge sent my life into a tailspin. A little over a year ago, I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis at age 57. It's been a difficult journey filled with unexpected dips and turns, but I continue to navigate life as best as possible. The good days far outnumber the bad days, so I hold onto that.

I try to remain optimistic -- about life, my illness, and the world in general. And as a midlife woman, I know that the knowledge, experience, and wisdom that we bring to the table can't be faked, bought, or duplicated. We're the real deal. So I try to get everyone else to see that as well.

You can find Valerie at the links below:

• Midlife-a-Go-Go for Valerie’s blog and podcast: https://www.midlifeagogo.com/

• The Invisibility Trifecta: Why Midlife Women of Color Matter (TedX Charlotte Talk): https://youtu.be/RGUPnitqAxM

• Connect with Valerie on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/midlifeagogo/

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