In this episode, Shelly Sharon and I dive deep into the mother wound, a relational trauma that often begins in childhood and shapes the way women see themselves, connect with others, and navigate motherhood. Together, we unpack a deeply misunderstood truth: healing does not require forgiving the mother who caused the harm.

Instead, we explore why true healing is an internal process, rooted in self-awareness, emotional repair, and breaking survival patterns that were formed long before adulthood. We also talk about how the mother wound shows up in identity, boundaries, and relationships, and what it looks like to rebuild a sense of safety within yourself.

In this episode, we cover:

What the mother wound really is — and how it develops

Why healing can happen without reconnecting or forgiving your mother

How forced forgiveness can actually block healing

The internal work required to break relational trauma patterns

Ways the mother wound impacts mothers’ own postpartum experience

Steps toward rebuilding confidence, worthiness, and emotional safety

Whether you’re in the thick of postpartum or reflecting on patterns that have followed you for years, this conversation offers compassion, clarity, and a path forward.

Below are the courses, blogs, and episodes Shelly referenced:

In this episode, I’m taking a moment to intentionally close out the year before opening the next.

I share why I believe how we end our day matters just as much as how we begin it, and how our nighttime routines quietly shape our mornings, our nervous systems, and our capacity to move forward with clarity.

I reflect on the realities of 2025, the struggles, the stretching, and the lessons that came with building work that lives at the intersection of maternal mental health, education, and advocacy. And I share what’s carrying me into 2026 with hope.

This episode also marks an important milestone: the launch of a powerful partnership with Andrea’s Wish Foundation that allows me to offer my 4th Trimester Group Program to ten mothers at no cost, a tangible step toward the kind of postpartum support mothers deserve.

I also talk about the recently released state maternal mental health report cards, which gave maternal mental health care in the U.S. a C average, and why this confirms what so many mothers already know: postpartum care is still largely reactive, fragmented, and failing families.

This is why I believe education, community, and preventive postpartum support should be the standard of care, not the exception.

If you’re a mother navigating postpartum, a provider supporting families, or someone who believes mothers deserve better, this conversation is for you.

Applications are now open for ten sponsored spots in the 4th Trimester Group Program through a partnership with Andrea’s Wish Foundation.

If you’re postpartum and craving support, connection, and guidance during this season, I encourage you to apply.

👉 Apply here

Women can experience 3 sacred windows in their lives: menarche, postpartum, and menopause, and today we open the window to postpartum through a different lens, the Ayurvedic and Universal Mother principles of care.  In this episode, I explore these principles and approaches with Christine Eck, the founder of Sacred Window Studies.  We explore the importance of understanding our bodies, what it means to "nourish" them, specifically in the postpartum period, and how her organization is prioritizing moms' recovery through the Conscious Care Giver Training program.  Our conversation was uplifting and inspiring, reminding me how special and valuable this transformative experience of postpartum is. 

Christine is a mother to four children.  She is an Ayurvedic Health Consultant, a Birth and Postpartum Doula, and the founder and director of the Center for Sacred Window Studies.  She is an advocate for social awareness and change for postpartum care in cultures where traditions in caregiving have diminished or disappeared.  She is an educator, speaker, organizer, caregiver, and group facilitator.  Her mission with the Center for Sacred Window Studies is to empower professionals in postpartum care and families with information and tools in creating the support needed during the sacred postpartum window.  She trains Conscious Postpartum Caregivers to support families using diet, routine, herbal support, healing touch, and the Universal Mother Principles of conscious care.  Christine resides in Western Massachusetts and teaches students around the world.

Trigger Warning:  This episode follows Andrea Kolbe's journey through pregnancy, postpartum, and the devastating loss of her life to perinatal suicide.  In this episode, I sit down with Andrea's sister, Kyra Vocci, who was willing to share Andrea's story with The Whole Mom, in an effort to raise awareness and talk as openly as possible about the risks of perinatal suicide in our country.  Since the loss of her sister, Kyra has made it her mission to raise awareness and advocacy about perinatal mental health, inspiring everyone in her path.  She joined Postpartum Support International's MD Chapter, where I have the honor of working alongside her on this mission.  She has since founded Andrea's Wish Foundation, where all proceeds have gone to unique approaches at funding additional services for postpartum moms.  She is a powerhouse and someone I am truly honored to know.  Please be mindful of where you listen to this episode and your mental health status at this time. 

Should this episode resonate with you, we would love to hear from you.  Please consider making a donation to Andrea's Wish Foundation and sharing this episode with family or friends.

“If you or someone you love is struggling, you are not alone. Call or text 988 for the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. For postpartum-specific support, call or text the PSI HelpLine at 1-800-944-4773.”

Social media can be a useful tool for many things.  It can also be detrimental for postpartum moms who are navigating unfamiliar and vulnerable spaces.  I get down to business in this episode, validating the desire for connectivity and motivation while also reminding you that social media is performative, much like the movies.  This powerful episode explores the dichotomy of "enjoying the newborn phase" and rushing our development and evolution as moms, and how that shapes our emotional constructs.  You are NOT going to want to miss this episode, no matter what stage of postpartum you are in.

Find your stage of postpartum:  

Apply to our Birthing Her Group Coaching Program

Your Free 4th Trimester Blueprint (developed by a perinatal specialist)

Breastfeeding is a lot of things, and underdiscussed and underprepared for are some of them.  Moms leave the hospital with their baby, diapers, and handouts, but retain little information about feeding their babies.  Instead of encouraging moms to "put the baby to the breast", let's normalize getting education around nursing and baby feeding practices.  Tune into this week's episode where I chat with Abigail Miles, RN, IBCLC, Founder of Latchline, and talk about the impact of nursing/pumping on maternal mental health, and how Latchline is helping moms within the comfort of their homes.

When I talk to you about prepping for postpartum, it goes deeper than your physical and mental health.  It should include all aspects of your baby's life, especially a feeding plan.  You know my motto is that it's better to have a plan and never use it than to need one and not have it, and that goes for feeding too.  In this weeks episode I sit down with Share The Drop Founder, Kelly Cox, and learn about her mission to match moms with milk and resources all across the country.  You can imagine that we had a lot in common, so tune in for an insightful and educational chat.

Kelly Cox, RPYT, LCSW, Birth Doula, 500 E-RYT

Cox is a registered prenatal yoga teacher, birth doula, licensed clinical social worker, and creator of Share the Drop.  Cox has worked with families throughout their childbearing years for 17+ years and now focuses on helping families without access to breast milk find donated milk in their communities. As a breast cancer survivor, Cox focuses on how those who are unable to produce breast milk can access it for their infants.

Have you ever felt like you carry all of the responsibilities of parenting and your household?  Have you ever wondered how this happened and if this is just how it's "supposed to be?"  Then you are in the right place.  I had the pleasure of speaking with Lucinda Gibbons, founder of Lake House Collective, who specializes in men's mental health, as well as perinatal mental health for all family members. We explored why this is the current situation for American moms and how to break through this.  We explore the Fair Play Method and what moms are responsible for vs what we are conditioned to believe.  You do NOT want to miss this.

Lucinda Gibbons, MMFT (she/her) holds a Master's degree in Marriage and Family Therapy and advanced training in Perinatal Mental Health from Postpartum Support International. She is the founder of Lake House Collective, where she specializes in men’s mental health, perinatal mental health for all family members, LGBTQ+ youth and parents, and cultivating inclusive and high-performing workplaces. She is the lead trainer for The Fair Play Method, where she trains practitioners and professionals from around the world to bring The Fair Play Method to individuals, couples, and teams of all kinds. 

Lucinda’s warm, matter-of-fact approach creates an inclusive and collaborative learning environment that encourages active participation and personal growth. Her expertise lies in rebalancing the domestic workload among partners, making space for men to learn how to identify and communicate their inner world to those they care about, as well as in parenting, communication skills, and guiding clients through making values-aligned choices in their lives. 

Lucinda lives just north of Boston, MA, and offers virtual sessions worldwide and in-person work at her office in South Hamilton, MA. 

We measure our growth and progress in the postpartum period by months rather than spaces.  In this episode, I share a new concept I developed called the Postpartum Stages, and explore what each stage looks like, what to expect from yourself, and how long these should last (reference guides).  I use this with my 1:1 clients to help give them a framework to navigate rather than an arbitrary deadline of 6 months, 9 months, or 12 months pp.  The stages help you accurately measure your progress based on outcomes, not deadlines.  I will walk you through the 4 stages that cover two years postpartum and lay the foundation for you to build upon.

If you enjoy this episode and are interested in working together on navigating these stages, please email me @ [email protected]

I had the distinct honor to sit down with Dr. Moya O'Leary, a psychologist and LPC, to open a large can of worms related to the "Mother wound" and generational influences.  We had a candid conversation about our pasts, and Dr O'Leary simplified the ideation of the mother wound, how our bodies keep score, and how we can still choose to mother the way we intend.

Dr. Moya O'Leary is a psychologist and licensed professional counselor, currently licensed in Connecticut, Florida, and Pennsylvania. She’s a proud mother of two, Wyatt and Olive, and a loving bonus mom to Carolyn. Moya blends relational-attachment theory with cognitive behavioral strategies in her work, supporting clients through nuanced emotional challenges with compassion and clarity. She is currently pursuing certification in Ketamine-Assisted Psychotherapy, deepening her exploration of consciousness and healing to help clients access deeper self-understanding. She aptly named her practice Healing Clover Counseling as a nod to her Irish roots and the four leaves of the clover, representing the four stages of life she has dedicated her career to: trying to conceive, pregnancy, postpartum, and motherhood. Moya is grateful to have connected with Nicole on the Midnight Mama podcast and is open to any other professionals interested in collaborating. 

Where to find Dr. O'Leary:

Healing Clover Counseling

IG: @Healing_Clover_Counseling