Has it ever felt tough to trust that a friend is really there for you?  When I was growing up in an alcoholic family, I learned never to trust anyone. Yet in adulthood, friends who really did have my best good in mind were kept outside a fence that only I could break down.

Has it ever seemed like it was difficult to just let go and do something on the spur of the moment?  I have had a lot of trouble with being spontaneous - unexpected events were frightening.

Has it ever seemed like your world is terribly complicated?  That you just go from one crisis to the next? I had learned to seek out and perpetuate crisis from growing up in an alcoholic household, and thrived on the rush of constant upsets in my world.

Hypervigilance.  What the heck is that?  In my world, it meant always being in what I call "on patrol" mentality.  It was like I was in a war zone, and the bad guys were out in the bushes.  Growing up in an alcoholic family, the slightest misstep could make me the target of my Dad's anger.

Has it ever felt like you were getting sucked into the drama of someone else's world?  As I experienced that, sometimes I had to step away - detach myself - from certain people.  Getting wrapped up in the chaos of another person's life, I wasn't doing myself any good.

Has it ever seemed tough to rely on God?  When I started dealing with the effects of growing up in an alcoholic family, I discovered my attempts at faith were more superficial than I had thought.

Yes, it's the line from Field of Dreams, but boy, it's a good one! It's a good concept in life - I might not get very far each day, but if I'm still moving, still trying, that's a good day!

Have you ever felt like you had things on your mind, and didn't know what to do about it?  Calling someone wasn't something I thought of, but it gave me a huge amount of relief as I went through the grief process.

Has it ever seemed like things were just going to stay the same, and that wasn't good?  By addressing my problems, beginning to find solutions, and seeing changes in my world, it allowed me to feel hopeful for the first time in a long while.

Have you ever been trying to work through a problem and you've looked at it so intently, that you almost can't see it any more, and are not closer to solving it? If I let my peripheral vision work on a problem I'm dealing with, I will suddenly see my answer with a lot less fretting and worry.