Motherbirth

Elly Taylor and her husband thought they were prepared for having their first child but quickly realized they faced unexpected conflicts. When Elly started counseling other parents, she realized most couples were experiencing the same challenges. She began researching the stages parents went through and how having children transformed relationships. When Elly became pregnant with her third child, she wrote her book, Becoming Us, with the hope of preventing postpartum anxiety, postpartum depression, and relationship breakdown for both parents through better preparation.

Parenthood is a venture into the unknown and has such a huge impact on couples.  Elly passionately believes that as a society we are setting parents up for failure - there is no longer a community of people invested in a raising a child. Nowadays, the support families desperately need drops away when parents leave the hospital or shortly thereafter, and we aren’t equipped with the ability to communicate with each other about our needs and challenges.

Elly shares the dark and challenging times of her own transition to motherhood in this honest conversation - and also shares the hope and potential she sees for families after years of working with her own partner and with other couples.  Her work and her perspective are so encouraging and we are so excited that the message is spreading and reaching more families around the world.  Elly has now begun training professionals in birth and mental health circles to become Facilitators of the Becoming Us approach - see the Show Notes below for more information!

In This Episode:

● Having their first fight in the hospital parking lot

● How silence contributes to stigma and stigma contributes to people not asking for help

● Why we wouldn’t send people into situations of the same magnitude as parenthood without preparation

● Understanding everyone copes differently

● Tips for initiating intimate, vulnerable conversations

● Research shows that 30% of women say their postpartum depression comes from unrealistically high expectations of motherhood

● How parents can voice their expectations so they don’t become assumptions

● How to work with challenges instead of against them

● The different stages of every relationship and how it makes a difference what stage we become parents in

● How parents can find middle ground and respect each other’s choices

● Why approaching conflict is different as a parent than it is as a partner

Show Notes:

Birthing Stone Baby Sleep Coaching Program — This Week’s Sponsor

Elly Taylor - her website

Becoming Us: 8 Steps to Grow a Family that Thrives, by Elly Taylor

Becoming Us Professional Online Training

Despite being a believer in out-of-hospital births, Page Rose ended up giving birth to her first two biological children in a protocol-driven hospital. Pregnant with her first child, Page went to the hospital due to back pain, where she was shocked to find out she was in preterm labor at just 33 weeks.

There was no known medical reason for Page to be going into labor. Even though the doctors told her she was having contractions, she couldn't feel them.  As things unfolded, fear and disappointment crept over her as she realized she wouldn’t be able to follow her birth plan and would have to have a Cesarean.

Page got real with us about how her birth plan set her up for failed expectations as well as a lot of trauma and how she found healing in her journey as a mother.  The beautiful story of her redemptive second VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) at home in the water and of making it to 39 weeks after two premature births is an emotional one - not to be missed!

In This Episode:

● Her first baby being in the NICU for 2 ½ weeks and the staff only agreeing to allow 50% breast milk even after Page pleaded

● How triggers from Page’s past added to her postpartum depression

● How transitioning from being a hospital patient to being a visitor there to see her baby was agonizing

● How a support group like ICAN can make a huge different in relieving mental and emotional stress during the postpartum period especially after a traumatic birth

● Being determined to make it to full-term with her third so she could finally have her homebirth

● Why it’s important to hold your birth plan loosely and consider preparing for multiple scenarios

● The importance of prenatal and postnatal self-care

Show Notes:

Birthing Stone Baby Sleep Coaching Program — This Week’s Sponsor

International Cesarean Awareness Network (ICAN)

The Difficult Transition from NICU to Home

About This Guest:

Page Rose is a mother of five. Her family of three biological children, two stepchildren and husband live in the Northwest. Page is a postpartum doula and an advocate for maternal mental health and loves to support families in their transitional years. Page documents her day-to-day life with littles through beautiful photography and honest representations of being a mother - you can find her here:

Instagram | Facebook

An experienced NICU nurse faces her worst fears when her second daughter is born prematurely via c-section with unexpected respiratory failure and struggles to survive.

After an emergency cesarean at 26 weeks, a first time mother faces an agonizing NICU stay while her daughter fights for her life.

Part 2 of her story, co-host Mellisa Reeves shares about the difficult and grueling labor with her first son, complicated by severe postpartum anxiety and a long road to recovery.

Co-host of the show, Mellisa Reeves, shares the devastating story of the unexpected stillbirth of her son Rowan, and how grief changed her life.

Christa Black Gifford had no idea that her daughter, Goldie, had anencephaly until the moment she was born at home, delivering in one push since she only had a partial skull. She shares about the time they spent with Goldie before saying goodbye and what her healing journey has looked like.

Lindsay Ostrom of Pinch of Yum shares her moving story of delivering her son at 23 weeks, how she chose to spend their few precious hours together and what healing has looked like since saying goodbye.

A mother shares the haunting story of waking up to find her 2 day old son having passed away of SIDS, and how she found healing and strength in her life as a mother.

Filmmaker Jessicca Moore (Documentary - Why Not Home?) shares her story as a nurse practitioner of choosing a homebirth after researching her options and realizing that more and more medical providers are making the same choice.