Survival mode. Understanding
how stress is silently
running your life and
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impacting your behavior.
Welcome to this three-part series
inside the Movement, Mind and Meaning
podcast. I'm your host, Megan Nolan. We
are going to be unpacking your stress
response, IE you remember fight or
flight, rest and digest. It's evolved
more than that and we're going to talk
about that too. But in this first episode
we're talking about fight mode. We're
talking about when stress happens and you
go into go mode and the different
patterns like perfectionism and control
and being a high performer show up
as survival strategies to
handle the situation. We're going to
unpack all of that. So let's back it up
a little bit. Remember back in
biology when you learned about your
nervous system, right?We're going to do a
little refresher and perhaps this will be
a little bit of a oh wow, this is really
cool because we've come further in our
understanding thanks to an incredible man
named Doctor Steven Porges who
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recognized based on research that he was
doing with little babies who were in the
NICU. Different patterns of the nervous
system that were not until that point
known about. You probably remember rest
and digest, right?Rest and digest is when
we heal and our body processes food, we
metabolize, we eliminate, we're we're
grounded, we're we're calm. We can
heal because healing only happens in the
rest and digest state versus fight or
flight, right?You've probably heard that.
Oh, I'm in fight or flight. Not actually
the same thing, but that's OK. We'll talk
about that too. So basically until
1994, we basically thought that we had an
on switch, a gas pedal, which is the
sympathetic or stimulated fight or flight
response where we handle stress by either
running towards it, right, which is the
fight or running away from it, which is
the flight or freezing, shutting
down and not being able to handle it. But
we've subsequently realized that there's
actually more than just that on switch
and the off switch being the
parasympathetic state, the. Rest and
digest the soothe and
ground, the stay and play.
We're more complicated than we thought.
You're more complicated than you thought.
But fundamentally, what's happening is
your body is either searching for
well, it's always searching for signs of
safety or threat,
because its main function, the main
function of your nervous system, is
survival, keeping you alive. Right. And
so this evolved, incredibly intricate
system has evolved over millions of
years, but innately is the same.
It's searching for threats and dangers
and risks in your environment and your.
External environment and internal
environment. So it's constantly scanning.
It's kind of like an antenna. It's
constantly seeking out information from
the environment as well as what's
happening inside of you. So not only are
you receiving information, but you're
also emitting information. This is
important. We'll talk about that more
later because it's your vibe, right?Your
electromagnetic field or your vibrational
frequency, however you want to say it,
you are emitting a signal by way of your
nervous system again. This is so cool.
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And this is something that, you know,
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inside the yoga practice, they've been
talking about for thousands of years. And
now neuroscience is like, Yep, you guys
are right, you're pretty amazing. The
breath is important, all of this stuff.
We're going to get to it. But, you know,
plug for yoga because it's amazing. So
let's talk about this. So if your nervous
system perceives a potential threat in
the environment, it goes from being
in this nice, regulated,
centered, steady state.
Of this level of connection. So this
first state of the nervous system is
called the ventral vagal state. And this
is where you're engaged with people in
the environment. You have a nice peaceful
expression on your face. You're able to
handle challenges and then settle back
down. You can relax without collapsing.
So this is the baseline state, right?And
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we operate here and this is where we we
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tend to. Hopefully spend most
of our time, however, due to chronic
stress, not all of us do, but you know,
we'll get to that as well. So we want to
be able to be in this state, rise to the
challenge and come back and regulate,
right?So this is our our window of
tolerance or what we can handle that, you
know, doesn't fully trigger us and cause
us to get dysregulated. But what happens
when our brain perceives a threat, either
internal or external, either real or
imagined?Is we get activated.
So we go from being regulated to a
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very activated, dysregulated state. We
go into go mode, right?This is where we
switch on the gas pedal goes
basically where what is controlling us
and relaxing us and grounding us gets
lifted. Think of the the brakes on a
bicycle, right?So when you squeeze the
brakes, everything slows down. So the
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ventral vagal part of your nervous
system, right, because. There's more than
just the the on off switch. That's why
this is called the polyvagal theory,
because there's poly meaning more than
one, meaning many. So what happens is the
the ventrovagal part of our nervous
system is like a brake and it slows
everything down. OK, so we're just riding
on our bike and we got the brakes on.
We're going at a nice easy pace and here
we go. And then all of a sudden it's
like, whoa, threat. Say there's a big a
car in front of you. So the brake comes
off, right?So the the nervous system
state shifts. And then all of a sudden
we're in go mode. Your heart rate gets
elevated, your digestion slows down,
your brain activity shifts from
being, you know, happy, present,
creative, in flow, whatever, to survival
mode, right?So a different part of your
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brain called the amygdala gets activated
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because it's sensing the threat in your
environment and it kicks us into go mode.
So it sends a signal to your adrenal
glands. It's like, go, we need
adrenaline, we got to take action. Your
heart rate starts pounding, your muscles
get activated, you start. to just get
ready to handle the situation.
So you are now activated in the
sympathetic state. So this is another
state of the nervous system, right?So
what's happening here is we go into
fight or flight. In our next episode,
we will talk about flight, where we run
from the situation, i.e. get the hell out
of there because it's dangerous, whatever
it is, right?Today we're talking about
fight, so being mobilized,
going into action. And going right
towards the situation, right. So
when the situation was, say, a
bear, we and if you were going to fight
it, I don't know why you would, but
whatever, we would go towards
the predator and prepare for action and
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engage in whatever fight mechanism. Maybe
we had to, you know, I don't know. I'm
not. I don't want to be aggressive
towards the bear, but it's a survival
situation. OK, so the body would need to
respond to the situation. So what's
happening here is that you would diffuse
this stress energy by fighting back,
right?We would diffuse it by, you know,
either, I don't know, maybe you poke the
bear in the stomach, you punch, I don't
know, whatever, whatever you'd have to do
with the bear. We we would go into go
mode. We prepare for action with the
predator. But because in our modern life
there's not a predator per
SE, this survival strategy
of fight mode is still activated,
but we internalize it. So rather
than this outward expression of
I got to fight back, I got to deal with
the situation, we default to these
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survival strategies that are still using
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this same stress response as a
mechanism. We default to these
strategies. Such as the high
performer pressure trap, such as
perfectionism, control issues, anxiety,
overdrive. We're gonna talk about these
individually, but basically
this is your body's way of handling the
stress. But instead of externally
expressing it, we bring it inwards.
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We pressurize ourself and we push
ourself to be able to fight back against
the stressor, right?Again, it can be real
or imagined, internal, external.
Basically, this is your way of handling
the stressful situation. Well,
how do I know that this is happening?
Well, as I go through these different
survival strategies, you might recognize
yourself in them. Well, how?
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How does this get decided?Which one we go
to?You might be wondering to yourself.
Well, your nervous system was patterned
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when you were a child before the age of
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7. Based on your environment,
your upbringing, the environment that you
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were raised in, the way that your
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caregivers behaved and handled stress,
it's dependent on your constitution, your
attachment styles, your
personality, the actual
situation. All of these factors will
impact how you respond in a stress
situation. And again, I should say that
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you know, of course. There
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is a caveat here. There are very real
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survival situations in our modern life. I
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am not negating that, but I'm just saying
that for the most part, our life,
thankfully, is not the level
of survival requirements that our
ancestors had when they were running from
the tigers and such. So of course there
will be real survival situations where we
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we do go into fight mode. We have to
handle the situation like you have to.
You know, like break down the door or
whatever it is and we go into action. But
in this modern reality that we live in,
this fight mode here tends to
shift us into this sort of gas
pedal go mode where we are running
towards the situation and taking action,
right. And so because we couldn't, we
can't discharge the stress energy, the
adrenaline, the cortisol by. You know,
fighting back in this situation, all of
this chronic stress gets internalized.
Chronic stress is a major contributing
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factor in every major chronic disease.
And so the more we can become aware
of stress in our life and how it's
showing up, and the more we can have real
time practices like power pauses to
regulate in real time and bring our
stress levels down, the better. Right.
Because your nervous system is very
responsive and so it wants to come back
to homeostasis, it wants to come back to
regulation. But if we are just operating
in these protective patterns and these
survival strategies and we're not even
aware of it, we're just feeding the
stress cycle in our body, right. The
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adrenaline continues, the cortisol
continues, which causes inflammation and
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heart issues and joint issues and and all
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sorts of things. And so it's really
important that we recognize that the the
threat is typically. No longer physical
and it's tends to be more emotional,
mental, chemical sometimes.
But we want to look at how this pressure
that we experience in these stressful
situations, it's really triggering the
same stress response, but we don't have
this outlet, we don't have this, you
know, diffusion. And So what we do
is instead we go into.
High performing pressure trap as as the
first mechanism of fight mode. So let's
talk about this one. And you may not go
through all of these. I think that we all
have these different patterns and we
engage them based on the situation. We
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engage them based on our personality. You
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may do some more than others. You may not
do any of, you may not do one or two of
them at all, but it's just something for
you to be aware of because the more you
can be aware of these patterns as an
indicator of what's happening internal.
As a a cue that your nervous system
is in a dysregulated state, IE you've
gone into fight mode, then the
more self-awareness that you have, right?
Because that's what this really is, is
helping you develop self-awareness of
these patterns. And because they are
learned behaviors, good news, they
are changeable, much like you update the
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operating system on your phone. These are
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changeable because your brain is plastic,
right?Neuroplasticity. It's not actually
plastic. Neuroplasticity, meaning it's
changeable, it's malleable. So
what happens when we identify as
a go person, an action-oriented, a
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go-getter, a doer, a high achiever, a
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high performer, the the person that
really pushes yourself to the Max?
Then we have the high pressure
trap. Right. And so this, this,
I got to make it happen. I I'm going to
do it. I want more, I want better, I want
faster. And it's this
drive that is pushing
us forward and we're going to handle the
situation through action,
right. And so this actually feeds on
itself because when we accomplish a goal.
Then we have a release of dopamine, and
the brain loves dopamine. So it says
whatever we just did, let's do it again.
And so we get into this cycle where we're
constantly feeding and we're running on
these stress hormones as well as
dopamine, and we feel this internalized
pressure based on the stress of whatever
situation we have going on. And so
we want to look at this and recognize
that this is an adaptive
mechanism, right?This is the mind's way
of handling stress. It's not innately
good and it's not innately bad. But if we
are constantly running this way and we're
running on the on stress and we're in
this very dysregulated, sympathetic
state, we run. We burn out the system a
lot faster, the system being your body,
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right?And we just talked about the effect
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of stress. So if you notice yourself in
that pattern, recognize it and label it,
call it out. Oh, this is my mind. This is
my mind in this pattern. I do this. I do
this sometimes. And you might have done
it so much that you identify it and you
just have it be as part of your
personality, right?Some people just
identify as being high performers and
it's like a badge of honor in many
communities. And and that's good
as long as it's used from that place of
purpose and power and presence
and intentionality, I.e., it's used from
a place of regulation in the nervous
system. OK, so that's one of
the first fight.
Reactions when we have stress. Again,
this isn't necessarily sequential, like
you weren't necessarily go into this one
and that one and this one. These. I just
want to show you these different ways
that fight energy shows up, OK, in these
behavioral patterns. The second one is
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perfectionism. So perfectionism is an
attempt at controlling the situation.
Right. If we think that we make it a
certain way and we have that level of
control, it's a safety mechanism.
And when we think that we are controlling
it, it's a way of this creating
perceived safety because that's really
what your brain and your body want is
safety. So how can we give it safety?We
can power pause and we can regulate, but
we'll talk about that in a second. So
perfectionism, again, it's not inherently
good or bad and and it has, it has really
great things to it because we want to be
attentive to detail. We want to make sure
that things are presented in a really
high quality, but we also don't want to
be obsessive, right. And so that's really
interesting because again, we want to
look at how these behaviors are
playing out and and were these modeled
for you as as a child, like is this
something that your mom or dad did and or
is this something you learned from a
teacher or whatever?So again, you may or
may not engage in these behaviors. I just
want you to bring some shed a little
light on it. The third one that is a
fight response is control,
having difficulty, having
other people help you, trying to be in
charge of the situation, trying to. You
know, manage every little detail, being
a bit of a control freak, right, as we we
call it. And so again, this is a way of
the body attempting to balance the
situation. But usually it's
counterproductive because this control is
really an illusion, like we really don't
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have control in every situation. And so
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it can again cause us to be more and more
stressed out. And so again, just looking
at this from the lens of non-judgmental
self-awareness, like if you notice
yourself, if you notice that you have
control issues. Then again, this is just
something for you to be aware of. It's a
way that you've been handling stress,
right?And so again, this is might be
something that has been so
woven into the fabric of who you are
because of experiences you had in in the
past that some people suggest that these
behaviors are even trauma responses
because of how you learn to handle a
situation before. And then we default to
this because it's been patterned so much
into your nervous system. So again, these
are just things to look at through this
lens of curiosity, right?Through this
lens of compassionate curiosity. So the
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the 4th mechanism for fight mode
is
anxiety OverDrive.
So anxiety OverDrive is that
very activated state, very
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stressed state, right?And so this is
basically. Running on the
fumes of stress and
it's over functioning, overdoing, over
giving, attempting to control the
situation or be the leader in the
situation, but doing it from this place
of being off
kilter. It may appear like that you're
coming across with that level of
confidence and authority and being fully
engaged. But The thing is, is that if
it's this more dysregulated way of doing
that, it can come across very
performative. It's like we're trying to
prove something to ourself, prove
something to other people, and it really
is. You know, underneath it all, we have
this level of exhaustion or overwhelm or
maybe even dread or maybe even
resentment. But we we're powering
through, we're pushing through, we're
fighting through to get things resolved
or get things handled, right. So
again, this is interesting because
this is both a a very activated
state in the sympathetic state,
but there's there's elements
of. Connectivity
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and attempting to engage with others in
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the situation because we're attempting to
navigate it by handling it, by,
you know, presenting really well, by by
taking action, by showing up. And so it's
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a really interesting state. So this is
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more of a blended state. So we have
aspects of the sympathetic and we have
aspects of the parasympathetic because
we're attempting to be social and engage
with other people. But it's from this
very like, you know, frantic and frazzled
and on the verge of a freak out.
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State of being. So
what's happening here is that stress,
right?Stress is is prevalent in these
situations. The body is perceiving a
threat. It's realizing that we need to
handle the situation and and this is a
reality, right?This is a stress response.
This is the way that we are handling it.
It's not necessarily. Beneficial.
It's probably a little bit maladaptive,
but it's an adaptive behavior that you've
learned. This is, this is something that
you've practiced for a while and you're
just dealing with it, right?And so the
interesting thing is that, you know,
women are more likely than men
to internalize stress,
and we are more likely to engage in
these behaviors because we are
considered the. Caregivers, we
are shown to be and we want to be able
to balance all these things. I can handle
it, I can do it. And so when we
have this stress in our life and we
default to one of these modes, this can
cause us to be in that chronic stress
cycle more and more and more.
And 75% of adults, according to the
American Psychological Association,
experience stress or have experienced
either physical signs of stress or
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psychological. Signs of stress in the
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last year. And it's really common, right?
It's very common. And you know, some
stress is good, but when we have chronic,
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exhaustive levels of stress and if we
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stay in these survival strategies and we
stay running on stress, then it's
exhausting to us. And it's not
necessarily making use of all of
the incredible gifts and talents and
amazing parts of your being that you
have. And So what we want to
remember is when we're observing these
patterns, these strategies that we
default to, you know, just because
they are wired into your neurology,
into your nervous system, because they
were, again, learned when you were a
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little child, they're operating at the
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level that you may not even be aware of
until now. And so we want to
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witness these parts of yourself because
what they are are parts of you,
right?It's. It's a part of your journey
where you learned how to do things this
way, and you default back to that because
maybe it worked in the past. And so
rather than trying to, you know,
eradicate this behavior
or make it wrong in any sort of way, we
want to turn towards that part of
yourself. Because think about it. This is
a survival strategy. This is a
self-protective mechanism. It's
attempting to do what it's supposed to
do. So it's not negative, it's not
bad. But what
can happen because of it is if we
are listening to it and we're
following through and we're just doing
these behaviors because they are wired in
and we don't even realize we're just
feeding that cycle and we're fortifying
that pattern, right?It's like. You are.
You're training yourself to do it this
way because it worked OK in the past, and
maybe you haven't been more
effective ways of reducing your stress
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and being able to operate at the level of
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regulation just yet, which is what power
pauses do. So you just default to this
as your stress reaction. And so sometimes
we do it so much we think it's part of
who we are and we think it's part of our
personality. But what we want to
recognize is that this is. It's a
pattern. It's a way of
living that you have practiced for a
while, and that's OK. And we want to look
at it and we want to turn towards it with
a sense of appreciation.
What?Why?It's doing something that's
exhausting me and it's causing me to burn
myself out or whatever. Well, it's doing
what it's supposed to do. It's protecting
you. It's helping you handle this
situation. So we want to look at it with
a sense of acceptance and love, because
what it's showing you is that you are in
a contracted state. You are in a
protective, contractive state. So it's
showing you that you're dysregulated, and
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you may not recognize it because you've
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been doing it for so long that you think
that's just the way that this is. But
what we want to do is recognize that this
pattern, this way of doing things, way
of handling stress. It's not
necessarily conducive to
evolving and expanding and getting to the
place where you are achieving your goals
with ease, where you have sustainable
success, where you have that level of
continued energy and clarity and
focus, because that's what comes when
we're in a regulated state. We can rest
without collapsing, but we can rise to
the challenge without overexerting
ourselves or going into that spiral.
That's where we want to come back to, and
that is that state of regulation in the
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nervous system. So when we notice that
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we're engaging in this old, outdated
pattern, we label it the mind.
Oh, there's my mind again, trying to
protect me. You know, some people like to
make up funny names for their mind and
just call it like whatever the the
squawking seagull collective or the
shitty committee in your head. Or, you
know, some people call these patterns of
self-sabotage. I don't necessarily agree
because I think it's a pattern of
self-protection. So, you know, some
people name these different characters,
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whatever. You can do that, right?You can
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do that. Just label it. Oh, there's my
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mind. Oh, there's my mind. And that's
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what it is, is your mind is attempting to
protect you. So we label it. And
then when we recognize that, and when you
are bringing that level of consciousness
to it, is that you're shifting from the
state of the fear center in the brain,
your amygdala, and it's automatically
bringing back online your prefrontal
cortex, which is your higher mind. The
creativity, the CEO of the brain, where
we can process emotions more
consistently and more effectively. So
we want to label it, right?And you can
now that you know, oh, I'm in fight mode,
I'm in fight mode, I'm in go mode here.
So we're in go mode, right?We want to
come back to flow mode. We're going to
get to know mode later, but we're talking
about go mode now. So I'm in go mode
right now, but it's you don't have the
fuel to sustain that pace. And
it's not the effective use of your
talents and gifts and skills. It's just
not, right?Despite what your mind says,
and we get so conditioned to running and
operating this way, is that we forget
that within you is an innate wisdom
that will guide you towards your next
step. And this is the wisdom of the
prefrontal cortex or your intuition, your
soul, however you want to say it. But
what we're doing here is bringing you
back into that regulated state where you
have the availability of more information
because you can perceive it. When you're
in a survival state, you're under stress.
You don't even see all of these other
opportunities that are around you. We
don't see these other options because
you're just about survival. So first we
want to label it. There's my mind doing
its thing again. And then I want you to
drop into your body. So this is the power
pause method. So we want to label it and
we want to feel the feels. So I want you
to label the feeling that you're
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experiencing. Oh, I'm feeling very
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00:26:09,1000 --> 00:26:11,520
overwhelmed right now. I'm feeling very
pressurized. I'm feeling tight. And so we
label it and we give it that sense of
acknowledgement. Because what we're doing
here is, remember, this stress energy has
been very active in your system and your
body's just trying to handle it and
trying to fight back from the situation.
So we want to be able to give an
opportunity to express some of that
stress energy out of your body. And
metabolize the stress, meaning process
it or move it through, right. So
first thing we want to feel the feels, we
want to label it, right. So then we're
already shifting gears. You've brought
everything back into that level of
awareness and consciousness and presence.
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00:26:51,1000 --> 00:26:54,720
So we feel the feels. And then
we take a power pause. So we want to give
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00:26:57,480 --> 00:26:59,1000
an opportunity to ground into your body.
We want to give an opportunity to support
your body so that you can come into a
state of regulation. So you can use a
tool, you can use a resource. So
usually we use something in the body.
Maybe, you know, you could use your
breath. Since you're in fight mode
and you tend to have a little bit more of
that very activated
go forward momentum, you may need
something that's a little bit more
active. I do find that when you're in
that that fight mode, you need something
that's a little more active to
down regulate you. So for example, you
could do some sort of like running on the
spot or stamping your feet on the ground
and pounding your feet into the ground.
If you feel that you know you can do that
in the situation that you're in, you
might use your breath
in a really intentionally
letting it out, expressive sort of way.
So that's how you can take the power
pause and then so we feel the
feel as we take the power pause and then
when you feel the shift right, when we go
from go mode to flow mode, you'll feel
yourself. Everything
is settling, grounding, becoming a little
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bit more present. Then from that
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place of power, from that place of center
within yourself, you get to decide
how you're going to go back into the
situation. And that is your
place of power. That is being able to
show up on purpose. And that
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00:28:31,040 --> 00:28:33,1000
is really the true magic of the
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power pause is reminding you that you are
a purposeful powerhouse. You get to
decide. You get to live and move and
breathe and show up on purpose. And that
is so powerful. So you
decide how you're going to go back into
the day. Do you want to be centered?Do
you want to be focused?Do you want to be
happy?Whatever it is, right?Some people
struggle to decide on that in the moment.
So sometimes we. Not sometimes in the
power pause movement, we go deeper into
this. So you know who you are, right?You
know who you are at the deepest level of
how you want to show up and how you want
to feel. So you know that you already
have that information. You're like you
finish your power pause and then you say
to yourself from that activated,
grounded, centered state, I'm a
purposeful powerhouse. I can do this. And
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00:29:17,280 --> 00:29:19,1000
so you are activating, you're anchoring,
you're deciding, you're intentionally
calibrating to that. And now you're back
in the flow state. OK,
so this is part one of the
series. This was flight mode.
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00:29:33,1000 --> 00:29:36,560
So Part 2, we're gonna go into flight
mode, flight like airplanes go into
flight. And when we are activated, we're
mobilized, but we go away from the
situation. OK, so make sure to tune in.
This episode will be dropping next week.
And I really hope that this was
insightful for you because when you know
about your nervous system, when you know
about. How your body is attempting to
just deal with, you know, the challenges
of life, the stressors of life, and you
have this level of awareness of the way
that you're showing up and these patterns
that maybe were operating at the below
the level of your awareness before. So
subconsciously, when you can just shed a
little light on it, it gives you that
sense of, wow, this is really amazing.
This is, this is who you are, right?Your
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00:30:16,720 --> 00:30:18,1000
body's just trying to. Make it through is
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00:30:18,1000 --> 00:30:21,040
just trying to survive. And so looking at
these survival strategies from a
different perspective, I think hopefully
will give you some more clarity because
it's really, it's really quite
fascinating how we've evolved, right. And
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00:30:30,640 --> 00:30:32,1000
so the the most evolved part of our
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00:30:32,1000 --> 00:30:34,880
nervous system is that ventrovagal
state. And so that we want to go from
being able to recognize these patterns to
coming back into that regulated state so
you can be present. You can engage
in the situation. You can handle the
situation, right, which is that that
fight energy is handling the situation,
but from a much more
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00:30:55,1000 --> 00:30:58,320
controlled and intentional
state. And that's really what we're
looking for, right?That's really what
we're looking for. And that's truly
living from your leadership energy and
staying in that very, you know,
staying in your lane, if you will, like
staying in that place of of
Presence and power and purpose. So I hope
that this was really helpful for you. I
would love to connect with you further on
this. And so if you are a leader who is
leading teams and you're seeing these
signs of stress in your team members and
you're noticing maybe some of these
behaviors in them or in yourself, I would
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00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:33,1000
love to connect further. So I have a free
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00:31:33,1000 --> 00:31:36,040
burnout, risk and resilience quiz that
you can take. It's going to be linked up
in the show notes and you can take that
and give you some insight onto where you
or your team are and be able. To
help you to foster more resilience, right?
Be able to be in the flow zone and be
able to go into the go zone and then come
back, right. And that's really what
resilience is, is your ability to have
this flexible adaptability to life's
challenges. So I hope this was
insightful. Make sure to tune in for
episode 2. Next week we're talking about
flight mode and I bet you can
guess what those are. Maybe you can
guess, maybe you can't, but I'm not going
to tell you anymore. I hope you have an
amazing day and take good care. Bye bye.
