Movie Improvie: The Film Repair Podcast

Hey gang, we fixed The Shack this week. The movie we fixed is called The Shack. I wanna make that totally clear, cuz Phil and James forgot to say the title of the movie at any point in the podcast. The Shack, which was our movie this week, is about God and Jesus and how great those two fellas are, so obvs we threw all that out the window and made it about three of the wonderful kind boys from Queer Eye helping a man have his own sexual awakening, in Daddy Shack. It's a very nice time.

Also, we fixed the trailers for Sherlock Gnomes and Deadpool 2

Hello everyone! Phil came back from Palms Spring, so we came back from vacation! Some time ago, Phil and James watched xXx: The Return of Xander Cage and took some notes about it, so they tried to decipher their own cryptic, inscrutable notes on it to deliver unto you a better film. And they achieved their lofty goals with Gunboys: Kissboiz, an adaptation of William Shakespeare's Hamlet but in samurai times but with guns and also but with kissing. Do we remember Hamlet super well? No! But who cares when you've got beautiful, kissing boys shooting each other's heads off!

Also, we fix the trailers for Getting Grace, The Humanity Bureau, and CrossFit Presents: Redeemed and Dominated: Strongest on Earth, which is somehow not a title we made up

Hey you guys, did you know there was a fifth Underworld movie? Or a fourth Underworld movie? Us neither! But who gives a shit about that, cuz it's bad so we fixed it into the next global smash, X-Monster-Men Meet Van Helsing Meet Abbott and Costello, starring a whole grip of randomly generated folks, including 2 Hugh Jackmans, Ryan Reynolds as not Deadpool, Jeff Goldblum AS Deadpool, and of course, our muse, our lucky rabbit's foot, Mr. Armie Hammer.

Also, we don't fix the trailer for Venom, but we do fix the trailers for Death House and Hellraiser: Judgment

*deep breath* Hooooo jeez o' peets guys. Just a fair warning, this episode is our biggest, hottest pot of nonsense that we have ever put on the internets. So we watched The Cloverfield Paradox, which is a movie some people probably made and were in, (we've already forgotten) and, like an alchemist trying to make gold from lead, we accidentally bungled up our organs drinking mercury and we turned it into Arm & Hammer Presents: Arm and Hammer, the Armie Cloverfield Hammer Story, based on the real, actual, for sure happened life of Armie Hammer, who, as we all know, was born as just a single human arm and became an actor.

We also say Laura Dern's name so much her ears are probably now actually on fire, and we fixed trailers for Death Wish, The Cage Fighter, Living Among Us, and 7 Guardians of the Tomb.

Our sincere apologies to Armie Hammer.

Wowee wow, that sure is a long title, huh gang? Well we just needed more words to get across how awesome this movie is! We took the Academy Award nominee Boss Baby, which is pretty mediocre and forgettable, shoved it in the Movie Improvie Movie Grinder™, and we formed that gross nastiness into a delicious Movie Burger called Rosemary's Baby 2: Toss Baby, This Time The Baby Is The Weapon, starring Daniela Vega, Alia Shawkat, and Nicolas Cage, and hoo boy I think we have another franchise on our hands, friends and neighbors.

Also, we went ahead and fixed the trailers for Hurricane Heist, Deep Blue Sea 2, and Jurassic World 2 while we were at it! Tune in your earholes!

Hello aspiring Movie Improvers™! Hoo boy gang, we got a real stinker on our hands this time. Cuz this time, this time guys? We watched The Book of Henry, directed by Colin Trevorrow, and starring Naomi Watts, Dean Norris, and Sarah Silverman. This movie about a little boy who is a huge dick trying to murder a policeman was very bad, but we smacked it with our hammers and wrenches and we twisted its mangled form into the much better Overwatch the Top, star-- er, excuse me, it's actually called How to Watch Movies to Improve Your English for SEO reasons -- starring Jameela Jamil, Danny DeVito, Akaros, and Charles Melton, in a movie about a mom who *record scratch* plays vidya games?

Also, we fixed the trailers for Ready Player One, The Current War, and Show Dogs! It's a real hoot-and-a-half.

Hey everybody! Y'see how Batman's in the title? Well guess what we weren't actually fixing a movie with Batman in it, (even though they need our help badly,) we're actually fixing the bad, unfinished The Snowman, starring Michael Fassbender. We just decided to fix it into a movie franchise for DC about all their cool cold villain folks! So we started off our pitch with Batman v. Snowman: Dawn of Just Ice, starring Paapa Essiedu, Quvenzhane Wallis, Liam Neeson, and Kurt Russell. Also, we fixed the trailers for Death Race 4, Samson, and Alpha. 

Hello, how is everyone? Hey, do you folks like PIRATES? We sure do! So this week, we watched a pirate movie! But not just any one: The fifth one! Pirates of the Caribbean 5: Dead Men Tell No Tales, starring Johnny Depp, Brendon Thwaites, and Geoffrey Rush, is very bad. But what if it weren't? What if it was... good? And what if it had... Cowboys? Gender swapped cowboys? These are the bold questions your resident Movie Fixers had on their mind this week! Also, we watch the trailers for Truth or Dare, Wastelander, and *chicken picture* Blockers, and we went ahead and fixed those too. Also also, this is a 100 PERCENT MEN FREE episode!*


*except for James and Phil

Well hello there, Movie Nuffs and newcomers alike! Welcome to our new podcast, this time this one's called Movie Improvie! Phil and James are gonna set out to look at some bad movies, but rather than just be satisfied with movie that is bad, we're gonna make fix em better! This week, we looked at the Netflix Original Pile of Trash™ Bright, directed by David Ayer and starring Will Smith and Joel Edgerton, and we transform it with Improvie Magic into Goodspellas, starring Grant Gustin, Keanu Reeves, Gina Torres, and Michael B. Jordan. How'd we do that? Listen with your earholes to find out!

Happy Christmas or Other Chosen Winter Holiday erverybody! The Haters Cast has been retired, and starting next month we'll have a brand new podcast in this space for you to enjoy. But in the meantime, treat yourself to a little something special: The Origin of Christmas! Bored on a flight home for the holidays four years ago, Phil wrote an insane short screenplay about the true origin of Christmas. With James' help, he then printed copies of this script, highlighted lines, and placed it in the stockings of everyone in the family. Phil and James then forced invited their loved ones to do a table read of that script, and this recording is the result! We hope you enjoy it as much as we do.