Muse With Me

Introducing “Muse with Me,” a podcast lovingly hosted by Jenna Sophia Wadsworth. Here, we’ll explore the unexplored, the space between, re-weave the tattered fringes. This is an invitation to come learn to dance together within the No Man’s Land, reclaiming and restoring these well-defended, protected yet shared spaces.

For Independence Day, Free Your Voice; Sing Your Own Song. I sang mine. Here are two new expressions. Sung and played with all my love.

I found a piano waiting for me at a window today, another Fathers Day far away from my father. Two monarchs floated in and out of view as I played. I often think of nature making music as my fingers roam the keyboards, like wind swirling and water droplets cascading, leaves rustling, branches swaying… This piece I played for my dad.

September is Suicide Prevention Month, and I realize that I need to talk about suicide and the prevention of it in myself. So, here’s episode 2. Please, if you are struggling, keep trying again and again. Know that you are needed and wanted and loved deep deep inside.

To prevent suicide, we need to be able to talk about it. So, here’s a start to a conversation that needs to continue. If you or anyone you know needs support, please reach out for help. 988 is the National hotline for mental health.

In April 2022, I attended a conference as an exhibitor. It was my first conference in years, and I delighted in setting up my table and sharing conversations with everyone who came through. This was the remaking of my business, moving toward what I want it to be. I laid the table as a sacred act, with my beautiful Carnelian Mala draped in golden hands of gratitude as the finishing touch. During the lunch break, someone took the Mala, which was precious to me and the beautiful day caved in on my solar plexus like a gut punch, even as I attempted to relinquish that material item as a token that someone else must have needed more than me. The next day, I was still affected, struggling to release the grip on my diaphragm. Playing the piano helps me to release and transmute, so I found a piano to move thru the emotion trapped in my body. These three pieces are what came. First to release the thief, then to bless, and finally to recognize myself within them. The final piece is some of the most exquisite music that has flowed from me. I’m often shy to share these, as I don’t know that anyone else will appreciate them as I do. But who am I to hoard them for myself either? So, I relinquish them now, so as not to thieve these from you any longer. This music is not mine, but the thief’s. Welcome to it.

It’s been a while, so here’s a brief commentary and a song sung a cappella. If there are any inspired musicians out there who’d like to collaborate on instruments for this song, please reach out!

Recorded July 18, 2021 in the living room of the home I left in January of this same year. In order to be truly free and begin a new life, there’s a dying to to the old that must take place, and the soul must be released from what had tethered it in place. Be set free, oh my soul.

Recorded July 18, 2021 on the living room piano of the home that I left in January of this same year. Sometimes leaving is what is necessary, but that doesn’t mean it’s lightly done. There’s a weight to such decisions, a cost to such actions, and it’s worth grieving what is lost.