In this episode I talk about how when my husband died people seemed to have an awful lot of advice, how there are no perfect words to say in grief and how it helped me to have a safe place to be honest and to have people that would sit with me and just be. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I used to be a grinch around the holidays, how I felt guilty for not doing something special on the anniversary of my husband’s death in the past and how I decided to start a new tradition by inviting my son to a Remembrance Event in honor of Daddy. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how when I use terms like hot mess to describe myself it makes me feel awful, how I’ve learned that we tell ourselves stories and I’ve been telling mine for years and how I have my shit together way more than I give myself credit for. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how sadness is fairly new for me in this journey, how anger is a disguise for what is hiding below the surface and how it took losing my husband to learn how to love myself and figure out who I am. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I was conditioned to be good and to behave and to not ask for too much, how I recognize that people pleasing was a way to cope in the past that isn’t serving me anymore and how I’m tired of saying yes when I desperately want to say no.

In this episode I talk about how the gravity of being solely responsible for my son hit me hard, how there is nobody walking through my door at the end of the day to rescue me and how I can’t be my son’s dad but I can be the best mom I know how to be.

In this episode I talk about how I started having random pain and other symptoms after my husband died, how maybe it’s safer to play small and stay with what’s familiar instead of risking more loss and how I am safe and no longer need to live in fear. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how my son’s grief started showing up as rage and frustration and tears, how I worried that because my husband died by suicide my son might do the same and how replacing my anger and worry and fear with empathy allowed me to parent from a much more loving place. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how I don’t think anxiety was even a thing growing up in L.A. in the seventies, how my husband leaving me triggered something inside me and brought me right back to my childhood and how gaining more of an appreciation of how my mind works has allowed anxiety to have less control over me. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.

In this episode I talk about how the three little words “how are you” can be so complicated, how I didn’t want anyone to think I was too happy or too sad and how because my husband died by suicide I was afraid to raise any red flags. You can follow my blog at mymessylittlelife.com.