MY SELF CARE SH*T with Kathy Love

What if true self-care isn’t just what you do internally, but how you choose to show up in the world?

In this powerful and deeply personal conversation, Kathy Love sits down with Jessica Papineau to explore confidence, visibility, and the emotional connection between how we see ourselves and how we present ourselves.

Jessica Papineau is the founder of CSJ Styling, a leading personal styling company dedicated to empowering female entrepreneurs on a mission to change the world. With over 25 years in the fashion industry, she has helped thousands of women harness the power of style to serve their purpose, boost their confidence, and elevate their image. From seven-figure entrepreneurs and executives of billion-dollar global brands to influential creators and leaders in entertainment, sports, and music, Jessica’s expertise transforms wardrobes into a strategic tool for success.

She understands that style is more than clothing—it’s a catalyst for confidence, visibility, and impact. By curating wardrobes that align with each client’s vision, Jessica helps high-achieving women step fully into their power, show up with clarity, and make a lasting impression in every aspect of their lives.

A recognized thought leader in personal styling, Jessica has been featured on ABC News, She Means Business Magazine July 2025 Cover, Voice of Changes - Top 40 Speakers, spotlighted in top podcasts, and listed among MSN’s Top 10 Self-Made Women to Follow in 2025 and in top entrepreneurial publications such as LA Wire, Women's Journal, She Means Business, and NY Weekly. Jessica was featured in the book "Slaying Sarasota," and was a nominee for Sarasota Magazine’s ‘Women Who Roar’ Leadership Award. She continues to drive conversations about the intersection of style, confidence, and personal growth. Through CSJ Styling, she is redefining what it means to cultivate a wardrobe that not only looks extraordinary but serves as a tool for personal and professional transformation.

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Website: https://csjstyling.com/

Power Presence Quiz

When women align how they feel internally with how they present externally, they naturally become more confident, visible, and open to new opportunities.

This episode is sponsored by TheOutlierProject.live a global community where growth, connection, and authentic leadership come together.

Kathy Love is a self-care coach, speaker, author, and host of the Self-Care Sht* podcast. She helps people reconnect to themselves, build self-trust, and create lives rooted in purpose, boundaries, and emotional well-being.

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What happens when you leave a 100-year corporate legacy… and then get fired six months later?

In this honest and energizing conversation, Kathy Love sits down with Lyndsay Dowd leadership expert, speaker, and founder of Heartbeat for Hire to unpack reinvention, resilience, shame, confidence, and the power of intentional community.

This episode is for anyone navigating a career shift, recovering from a setback, or realizing that the circle you’re in may not be the only one available to you.

Lyndsay Dowd is a leadership expert, speaker, author, and founder of Heartbeat for Hire. After 23 years at IBM building high-performing teams and cultivating culture, she transitioned into entrepreneurship to help organizations develop emotionally intelligent, modern leaders. Lyndsay specializes in refining leadership behavior, elevating executive presence, and creating irresistible cultures that drive results.


After 23 years at IBM and a 100+ year family legacy with the company, Lyndsay left on her own terms only to be fired six months later from her new role. She shares the emotional impact of shame, identity loss, and starting over.

The Three Self-Care Questions That Changed Everything
that became the foundation for her business and a roadmap for anyone navigating reinvention.

From Shame to Power

Losing her job initially felt humiliating — but it became the most relatable and powerful part of her story. We discuss how setbacks often become the very thing that makes us accessible and impactful.

Can Bad Leaders Be Taught?

Yes — and many of them are simply insecure or never shown another way. Lyndsay talks about “reformed assholes,” leadership awareness, emotional intelligence, and why good leadership is absolutely learnable.

Building Your Personal Board of Advisors (PBA)

Why surrounding yourself with people who believe in you, speak your name in rooms you’re not in, and remind you who you are is essential self-care. Community isn’t optional — it’s fuel.

Visibility as a Skill

If you struggle to be seen, start by celebrating others. Shouting out the people who inspire you builds confidence, connection, and authentic visibility.

Reinvention Is Ongoing

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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What do you do when life hands you a death sentence, literally?

In this profoundly moving episode, Kathy Love sits down with Terry Tucker, a former college athlete, police officer, SWAT hostage negotiator, and cancer survivor who has been living with a rare and aggressive form of melanoma for nearly 14 years. What unfolds is a powerful conversation about purpose, resilience, faith, mental endurance, and the quiet, life-changing impact of simply showing up.

This episode isn’t about toxic positivity or pretending things aren’t hard. It’s about finding meaning in misery, making deep human connections, and understanding that your life exactly as it is right now matters more than you may realize.

Terry shares his cancer diagnosis story and how he reframed a two-year prognosis into a lifelong commitment to meaning, connection, and contribution.

Terry shares the four foundational truths that shape his philosophy:

• Control your mind or it will control you
• Embrace pain and difficulty
• What you leave behind is what you weave into others
• As long as you don’t quit, you can never be defeated

Episode Sponsor: The Outlier Project

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Karen Laos is a keynote speaker, executive advisor and TEDx coach, who transforms how high-achieving women communicate in business. Fondly called The Confidence Cultivator, she has empowered professionals at NASA, Google, Facebook, Netflix, and Sephora.

Her mission: to silence self-doubt in 10 million women by giving them communication tools that drive tangible results in the boardroom and beyond, using her trademarked method, The Confidence Cocktail™. Karen's clients consistently report significant outcomes, securing promotions, winning negotiations, and attracting ideal clients.

She’s a three-time bestselling author and podcast host in the top 3% globally (Ignite Your Confidence). Karen's books: Trust Your Own Voice: Growing Your Influence Through Confident Communication, Invisible No More: Stepping Into the Spotlight, and Unshakeable.

Website: Freebie: 3 Strategies to Speak Up in Meetings

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PODCAST: Ignite Your Confidence with Karen Laos

Contact: [email protected]

Retreat: (Santa Fe, April 30 – May 3)

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sh*t and leave a review!

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What if your greatest self-care superpower isn’t doing more — but pausing?

In this deeply reflective conversation, Kathy Love sits down with Laura Brennan Ballet to explore the concept of neutrality as a life skill — the pause between reaction and response that allows us to live, lead, and heal with intention. Together, they unpack generational self-care, emotional regulation, empowerment through awareness, and how learning to “see it through” can change everything. This episode is a reminder that self-care is not indulgence — it’s preparation for life

Neutrality as a Self-Care Superpower

Laura introduces neutrality as the pause that allows us to break patterns of reaction, judgment, and emotional overwhelm. Neutrality creates space for awareness, clarity, and choice.
Resource: The Science of Empowerment

The conversation explores how self-care is taught — not through words alone, but through behavior. Laura shares how her mother and grandmother modeled self-prioritization and how those lessons are now passed on to her daughters.

Negative, positive, or neutral — learning to recognize emotional energy helps us respond instead of react. Neutrality becomes a learned skill that can be practiced at any stage of life.

Self-care includes conscious decision-making. Laura discusses the importance of thinking ahead, understanding consequences, and choosing paths that serve both personal and collective well-being.

Laura shares the personal story that led to her book — a life-altering injury that required mental, emotional, and energetic rehabilitation. The episode highlights how empowerment is built through accountability, critical thinking, and self-love.

This episode is sponsored by The Outlier Project, a global community dedicated to personal growth, leadership, and meaningful connection.

As the #1. International Bestselling Author of The Science of Empowerment, Thought Energy Mindset Transformational Coach and Speaker, and Mind Development & Human Awareness Activator, Laura’s skill set, gathered wisdom, and personal discipline to advance human potential is evident in her creative work.
The care and consideration that supports her clients, attendees, and listeners around the globe, is evident at first greeting. High energy output and the feeling that all things are possible, begins the Co-creative relationship that she is sought after and known for.

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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In this deeply grounding and eye-opening episode, Kathy Love sits down with Kimberly Arnold, founder of Somatic Leadership, to explore what it actually means to bring the body into the conversation—especially in leadership, work, and everyday life.

This conversation introduces somatic healing in a way that is accessible, practical, and immediately useful. Kimberly explains why thinking your way out of stress doesn’t work—and how simple, physical shifts in the body can quickly restore clarity, calm, and connection.

If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, reactive, exhausted, or stuck in fight-or-flight, this episode offers a powerful new lens—and real tools you can use right away.

🧠 Key Concepts 

Somatic Awareness
Somatic work intentionally brings the body into awareness. 

The Nervous System Reality
80–90% of vagus nerve signals travel from the body to the brain. 

Resilient Reset
A Resilient Reset is a brief, physical micro-practice that helps you shift out of reactivity and back into clarity, presence, and resilience—often in under a minute.

💼 Somatics & Leadership

Kimberly shares how she works with leaders and teams to build collective resilience. 

Kimberly Arnold teaches leaders how to shift from adrenaline-driven execution to regulated, repeatable performance under pressure. Even self-described skeptics are surprised by how simple her Resilient Reset body-based practices are—many describe them as life-changing. Her approach helps leaders stay composed, credible, and human in crisis, rather than defaulting to burnout or reactivity, with 94% continuing to use the practices months later. Kimberly is an organizational resilience expert and a sought-after speaker, strategic advisor, executive coach, and corporate trainer, bringing decades of executive leadership at PwC, Salesforce, and Blue Shield of California, alongside deep somatic training rooted in Aikido, Tai Chi, Qigong, Feldenkrais and conscious dance.

 Learn more about Kimberly’s work at Resilient Reset:

Science-backed practices for regulated, repeatable performance under pressure

https://www.ResilientReset.com

Try Resilient Reset practices on YouTube:

Short, practical somatic tools you can use in real time

https://www.youtube.com/@SomaticLeadership

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Simple insights and practices to stop running on adrenaline and lead with clarity

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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In this powerful and deeply relatable conversation, Kathy Love sits down with Brian Sacheta, author of Get Out of Your Head, to talk about anxiety, looping thoughts, nervous system regulation, and what real self-care actually looks like when your mind won’t slow down.

Brian doesn’t come at mental health from a clinical or textbook place. He comes from lived experience—years of panic attacks, OCD, overthinking, and learning how to function in a world that didn’t leave much room (especially for men) to talk about feelings.

Together, Kathy and Brian unpack:

• Why anxiety loops happen
• How our brains are wired for survival—not modern life
• Why logic alone won’t calm an anxious nervous system
• And how movement, compassion, and awareness can interrupt the spiral

This episode is honest, practical, and grounding—especially if you’ve ever thought, “Why can’t I just stop thinking like this?”

✨ What You’ll Learn in This Episode

• Why anxiety is a protective mechanism, not a personal failure
• How the fight-or-flight response shows up in modern stress (hello, performance reviews 👀)
• What it really means to “get out of your head”
• Why movement and breath are often more effective than positive thinking
• How to recognize when you’re stuck in a mental loop—and how to gently interrupt it
• Why talking to yourself like a trusted friend matters more than you think

🧠 Brian’s Core Framework: The 10 Steps to Getting Out of Your Head

Brian shares insights from his book, including:

• Moving your body or eyes to signal safety to your nervous system
• Using breath to bring your prefrontal cortex back online
• Evaluating all possible outcomes—not just the worst-case scenario
• Reconnecting with compassion instead of self-criticism

This isn’t about “fixing” yourself.
 It’s about learning how to work with your brain instead of fighting it.

💬 A Moment That Really Landed

🤍 Who This Episode Is For

• Anyone living with anxiety, overthinking, or looping thoughts
• Men who were never given language for emotional experiences
• People who are tired of being told to “just calm down”
• Anyone ready to practice self-care that’s grounded, realistic, and human

Contact Brian:
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My first book (on managing anxiety)

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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In this powerful and validating episode of My Self Care Sh*t, Kathy Love sits down with Dianne, a coach and author, for an honest conversation about emotional abuse, self-gaslighting, codependency, and rebuilding self-trust.

Dianne shares her personal journey through two divorces, including an emotionally abusive marriage that left her deeply confused, disconnected from herself, and doubting her own reality. Together, Kathy and Dianne unpack why emotional abuse is so hard to recognize, why people stay, and how healing begins—not with answers, but with awareness.

This episode is a reminder that confusion is not a personal failure.
It’s a signal.
And learning to trust yourself again is real self-care.

✨ What We Talk About

• Why confusion is one of the biggest red flags in unhealthy relationships
• Emotional abuse vs. physical abuse—and why emotional abuse is often minimized
• Self-gaslighting and how it slowly erodes self-trust
• The fixer / helper identity and how it keeps people stuck
• Shame, denial, and protecting a partner at your own expense
• Trauma bonding, love bombing, and lack of pacing early in relationships
• Rebuilding self-trust after emotional harm
• Why self-love and self-care are the foundation of healing
• Forgiving yourself for what you didn’t see sooner
• Choosing peace over appearances, money, or comfort

🧠 Key Takeaways

• If you’re confused, something matters
• You can love yourself and still abandon yourself
• Emotional abuse is real—even when it leaves no visible marks
• Self-trust is usually the last thing to return
• Healing is ongoing, not something you “arrive” at
• Peace is worth everything

📖 About Diane

Dianne Harris is a life coach who supports people healing from emotionally abusive relationships and rebuilding their sense of self. She is also the author of the upcoming memoir Love Bomb, a ten-year journey of love, denial, awakening, and choosing herself. Dianne works with both women and men and is passionate about bringing more awareness to the long-term impact of emotional abuse.

🎧 This Episode Is For You If:

• You feel constantly confused or second-guess yourself
• You don’t trust your instincts anymore
• You’ve been told “it’s not that bad”
• You stayed because you thought you could fix it
• You’re rebuilding after emotional harm
• You’re choosing peace—even if it costs you comfort

💙 Final Reflection

It’s amazing how little we’re willing to live with
just to have our peace back.

Take a breath.
Pay attention to what your confusion is telling you.
That awareness is self-care.

Source transcript provided by the user

Support the show

If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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In this deeply honest and emotional episode of My Self Care Shi*, Kathy Love sits down with her dear friend Chason for a raw conversation about addiction, trauma, forgiveness, worthiness, and what true self-care actually looks like when the mask finally comes off.

Chason shares his life journey—from childhood abuse, addiction, homelessness, and survival, to healing, service, and founding Transformation Kitchen—a nonprofit built on dignity, community, and second chances. This conversation is about what happens when we stop performing strength and start paying attention to the pendulum inside us.

This episode is a reminder that self-care isn’t pretty.
It’s honest.
It’s brave.
And sometimes, it’s choosing to pause instead of pushing harder.

✨ What We Talk About

• Growing up in trauma and learning to survive
• Addiction, recovery, and forgiving yourself
• The danger of “partial healing”
• The monkey on your shoulder (and how to quiet it)
• Why journaling, brain dumps, and pausing actually work
• The moment someone paid it forward—and changed everything
• Building Transformation Kitchen as a trauma-informed nonprofit
• Letting people see your why
• Catching the pendulum before it swings too far
• Why true self-care means staying aware, not perfect

🧠 Key Takeaways

• You can be high-functioning and still drowning
• Self-care only works when you do all the work
• Forgiveness starts with yourself
• Awareness is healing
• Community saves lives
• Pausing is power

❤️ About My Guest

Chason Forehand is the visionary Founder behind two mission-driven organizations: HR Consultations, a boutique HR firm dedicated exclusively to empowering Social Good Entities, and HR-4U INC., a trailblazing Nonprofit committed to economic justice. Through bold advocacy and their groundbreaking Transformation Kitchen™️ program, HR-4U INC. champions living wages and workforce dignity for marginalized communities turning opportunity into lasting impact.  "They don't just flip eggs, they flip lives."

🌱 Mentioned in This Episode

• The Outlier Project
• Rayo de Sol
• Journaling & brain dumps as daily self-care tools
• Recovery communities and the power of asking for help

🎧 Listen + Support

If this episode moved you:

• Subscribe to My Self Care Shit
• Leave a 5-star review
• Share it with someone who needs to hear it

🌊 Final Invitation

Before you rush to the next thing—
Take one minute.
Breathe.
Pay attention to where your pendulum is today.

That is self-care.

Source transcri

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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In this raw and soul-stirring episode of the Self-Care Sht* podcast, host Kathy Love sits down with Erica Bonham, a therapist, author, and somatic trauma specialist whose work blends science, spirituality, and deep humanity. Together they unpack what it really means to heal the “not-so-pretty parts” of ourselves—those stories, sensations, and inherited wounds that live beneath the surface.

Erica shares how her own journey through adoption, sobriety, and family trauma shaped her mission to help others integrate body, mind, and heart. She explains ancestral and epigenetic trauma in down-to-earth language and offers powerful ways to reconnect to the body when talking therapy isn’t enough. From rage as sacred energy to shaking, laughing, and crying your way toward wholeness, this conversation is a masterclass in embodied healing.

🔑 Key Takeaways

• We All Have “Stuff.” Healing isn’t about erasing pain—it’s about metabolizing it so it can transform.
• Trauma Lives in the Body. You can’t think your way out of trauma; you have to feel and move through it.
• Find Your Own Medicine. Meditation, dancing, shaking, screaming, or stillness—whatever helps you release energy is valid.
• Slow Is Fast. Real healing takes time; rushing the process only recreates the trauma.
• At the Center of the Shadow Is Sweetness. When we compost the hard parts, we uncover love, levity, and liberation.

Erica Bonham is passionate about walking folks through the beautiful, messy process of turning wounds into wisdom so that we can all remember our true nature—that we are always and already enough AND we still have work to do. Her work bridges personal healing with collective transformation and invites us to remember that the world needs us here in our fullest expression. She is a nationally sought-after speaker, licensed professional counselor, certified EMDR clinician, consultant, trainer, bestselling author, and nervous system regulation coach. She’s passionate about redefining leadership as a practice of presence, resilience, equity, and joy.


📦 Download the Free Regulation Toolkit: 11 Somatic Practices to Get You Out of Overwhelm:  https://www.avoscounseling.com/freebie

🌐 Connect with Erica and her team for therapy and coaching services at: http://www.avoscounsleing.com

📘 Book: Get a signed copy of Erica's bestselling book, Always Enough, Never Done: https://www.avoscounseling.com/always-enough

💌 Find AVOS on Instagram and Linkedin:
https://www.instagram.com/avoscounseling/

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If you’ve been struggling with emotional codependency or want to learn how to establish a healthy balance of independence and vulnerability in relationships, join Kathy on this transformative journey. Be sure to subscribe to My Self-Care Sht* and leave a review!

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