In this episode, Sean and Josh discuss Josh’s long-time wrestle with perfectionism. The prescription for perfectionism will surprise you! Enjoy our second full length episode.
If you want more detailed show notes, please contact Josh here.
The books we talked about are below (please note that the college gets a small donation if you buy anything after clicking through to Amazon using these links):
* The Freedom of Self Forgetfulness by Tim Keller
* Embracing Obscurity: Becoming Nothing in Light of God’s Everything by Anonymous
* One Way Love by Tullian Tchividjian
The show notes follow:
Young people under 30 are pretty stressed out:
Dr. Richard Leahy, a prominent psychologist and anxiety specialist, was quoted as saying, “The average high school kid today has the same level of anxiety as the average psychiatric patient in the early 1950s. (From One Way Love)
What drives perfectionism?
1. Fears of inadequacy or fears of failing people (these examples come from Tim Keller’s books, The Reason for God and The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness).
Rocky
In the movie Rocky, his girlfriend asks him why it is so important for him “to go the distance” in the boxing arena. He replies, “Then I will know that I am not a bum…”
Chariots of Fire
In the movie, one of the main characters explains why he works so hard at running the 100-yard dash for the olympics. He says that when each race begins “I have ten lonely seconds to justify my existence.”
Modonna:
if you want a perfect example of what I am talking about, here is an excerpt from an interview with Madonna in Vogue Magazine some time ago where she is talking about her career. This is what she says: ‘My drive in life comes from a fear of being mediocre. That is always pushing me. I push past one spell of it and discover myself as a special human being but then I feel I am still mediocre and uninteresting unless I do something else. Because even though I have become somebody, I still have to prove that I am somebody. My struggle has never ended and I guess it never will.’ I will tell you one thing: Madonna knows herself better than most of us know ourselves. Every time she accomplishes something, these are the kind of thoughts she has: ‘Now I have got the verdict that I am somebody. But the next day, I realize that unless I keep going, I am not. My ego cannot be satisfied. My sense of self, my desire for self-worth, my need to be sure I am somebody – it is not fulfilled. I keep thinking I have won it from what people have said about me and what the magazines and newspapers have written. But the next day, I have to go and look somewhere else. Why? Because my ego is insatiable. It’s a black hole…”
· 2. A Comparison Mindset:
Tim Keller’s book, The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness says that “The way the normal human ego tries to fill its emptiness and deal with its discomfort is by comparing itself to other people. All the time.”
1 Corinthians 3:21-22: So then let no one boast in men.