No Trade Secrets

Welcome back to the playbook! We're diving back in with Kamil Mansuri, a privacy-first founder and software engineer. In PART ONE, we laid the groundwork for building with AI agents. In PART TWO, we’re getting brutally honest about why most AI products fail to gain traction and how to build one that lasts. What if the biggest threat to your AI startup isn't the competition, but the third-party models you rely on? How can a simple $20/month tool drastically improve your security? And why is the future of truly useful AI running entirely on your local machine?

⏮️ Catch Up on Previous Parts

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

Your $20 Security Blanket: Don't wait for a data breach to think about security. The first step is a simple audit of the customer data you're collecting (PII, cookies, etc.). For an immediate, high-impact boost, Kamil recommends using Cloudflare ($20/month) to set up a Web Application Firewall (WAF). This protects your domain from common vulnerabilities and is a foundational, cost-effective layer of defense before you even think about expensive penetration testing.

The AI Privacy Paradox: Most AI wrapper tools fail to achieve daily use because they're built on the same handful of third-party models (OpenAI, Anthropic, etc.). This creates a massive privacy vulnerability: you're sending your customer data to the tool, which then sends it to the model provider. For B2B or any privacy-conscious product, this is a deal-breaker and why a privacy-first approach is the ultimate competitive advantage.

Bet on On-Device AI: The solution to the privacy paradox is to bring the models to the data, not the other way around. Kamil argues the future of dominant AI tools lies in on-device, local models that run entirely on the user's computer. This eliminates the need to send sensitive data to external servers, building a truly private and secure user experience that fosters deep trust and wins in the long run.

🤫 PART TWO's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART TWO!)

Use AI against itself to audit your system. "I would actually spin up a separate agent that has no knowledge of your code base, no knowledge of anything. And you want that agent to ask you questions. And you could feed in those questions into other AIs... you wanna start developing a context and an understanding of your own system."

🗣️ Words to Build On

"[The] best tools are the ones that can leverage local models, the ones that can actually run on your computer and keep data local. And I think that's kind of why... those companies don't fully succeed." – Kamil Mansuri

"If you're building functionality on top of AI, you're essentially feeding it a new system prompt... The truth is you are sending that data to Anthropic, you're sending that data to OpenAI... which, of course, then violates that constraint." – Kamil Mansuri

"Sign up for Cloudflare. So your primary domain, it's $20 a month... You could put a WAF, a web application firewall. It will handle all sorts of crazy, like zero-day vulnerability." – Kamil Mansuri

👤 About Kamil

Kamil Mansuri is the founder of Bad Command AI, a Princeton, New Jersey studio building native AI applications for Apple platforms. Bad Command AI builds practical AI products, including Telescopo (a Markdown workspace for macOS), Telepath (an on-device AI voice agent call center for Mac), and Telefoto (an AI headshot platform). Before founding Bad Command AI, Kamil was VP of Engineering at Vapor IO, leading engineering across edge computing, cloud infrastructure, private 5G, automation, observability, and AI infrastructure. He previously led mobile backend engineering at Take-Two Interactive, helping launch Garden Tails on Apple Arcade, and served as CTO at Momentum Technology, working on telecom infrastructure and automation for products including Robokiller, SpoofCard, and TapeACall. 

He also worked as Lead Automation Engineer at Comcast, building foundational software for enterprise change management and alerting systems supporting NBC Sports and Xfinity Business Internet. His background spans finance, software engineering, telecom, cloud infrastructure, gaming platforms, native Apple software, and AI products, including award-recognized products like Robokiller and Garden Tails, and today he focuses on building software that is practical, fast, private, reliable, and thoughtfully designed. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Kamil on LinkedIn
• Check out Kamil's Blog
• Visit the Bad Command AI Website
• Telescopo Markdown Studio
• Telepath Voice
• Telefoto

 🎧 Missed the beginning? Go back and listen to PART ONE!

🎧 Make sure to tune in to PART THREE to hear Kamil Mansuri’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" and keep this momentum going

In the AI gold rush, the barrier to building and shipping software is lower than ever. But is faster always better? Kamil Mansuri, founder of Bad Command AI, argues that the very tools accelerating development can introduce massive security, financial, and business risks. He reveals why the "vibe coding" approach of just prompting an AI to build something often leads to low-quality products that fail. This episode is a masterclass in leveraging AI as an assistant—not a replacement—to build a true moat around your product through tactical shipping and an obsessive focus on user experience.

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

Don't Let AI Be Your Head of Product: While AI can rapidly generate code, it lacks the strategic foresight of a product team. Relying on it completely means you're trusting an algorithm to make critical decisions about your database, pricing, and security architecture without human consensus. This "shortcut" bypasses essential planning stages, creating significant financial and security risks for your business and your customers down the line.

Make User Experience Your Moat: In a market flooded with AI-generated apps, a simple, intuitive, and beautiful user experience (UX) is the ultimate differentiator. Kamil emphasizes that while AI can build functionality, it can't yet replicate the human-centric design that makes a product feel effortless and enjoyable to use. Obsessing over the small details, like how a user zooms or navigates, is what separates a forgettable tool from an indispensable one.

Connect AI Directly to Your Design System: To bridge the gap between your vision and the AI's output, connect your coding agent directly to your Figma files. By giving the AI access to your component library, fonts, and wireframes, it gains a complete understanding of your brand's visual language. This ensures the frontend it generates is not only functional but also perfectly aligned with your design standards from the very first line of code.

Seek Brutal Feedback, Not Biased Praise: Friends and family will cheer you on, but they won't give you the harsh feedback needed to build a resilient product. Kamil advocates for sharing your work on platforms like Reddit, where users provide unfiltered, often jarring, critiques. This raw feedback is invaluable because it exposes flaws you're too close to see, ultimately making your product exponentially stronger.

🤫 PART ONE's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART ONE!)

The modern founder's mantra shouldn't be to just ship fast; it should be to ship tactically. Before you can earn the ability to ship quickly, you must first establish a rigorous cadence of building, testing, and validating. Don't let the allure of AI-driven speed cause you to skip the foundational work of ensuring your product is something you can stand by and be proud of.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"The moat really, to me, is user experience now." – Kamil Mansuri

"You now are trusting the AI to be head of product... In that becomes risk, financial risk, security risk, and ultimately risk for your business and for your customers." – Kamil Mansuri

"If this product sucks, like, let me have it. I mean, I'll suck it up and I'll deal with it, but the product will be stronger because of it." – Kamil Mansuri

👤 About Kamil

Kamil Mansuri is the founder of Bad Command AI, a Princeton, New Jersey studio building native AI applications for Apple platforms. Bad Command AI builds practical AI products, including Telescopo (a Markdown workspace for macOS), Telepath (an on-device AI voice agent call center for Mac), and Telefoto (an AI headshot platform). Before founding Bad Command AI, Kamil was VP of Engineering at Vapor IO, leading engineering across edge computing, cloud infrastructure, private 5G, automation, observability, and AI infrastructure. He previously led mobile backend engineering at Take-Two Interactive, helping launch Garden Tails on Apple Arcade, and served as CTO at Momentum Technology, working on telecom infrastructure and automation for products including Robokiller, SpoofCard, and TapeACall. 

He also worked as Lead Automation Engineer at Comcast, building foundational software for enterprise change management and alerting systems supporting NBC Sports and Xfinity Business Internet. His background spans finance, software engineering, telecom, cloud infrastructure, gaming platforms, native Apple software, and AI products, including award-recognized products like Robokiller and Garden Tails, and today he focuses on building software that is practical, fast, private, reliable, and thoughtfully designed. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Kamil on LinkedIn
• Check out Kamil's Blog
• Visit the Bad Command AI Website
• Telescopo Markdown Studio
• Telepath Voice
• Telefoto

 🎧 Make sure to listen to PART TWO and keep waiting for that momentum to hear Kamil Mansuri’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" in PART THREE

Every founder chases their "A-game," but the truth is that your peak state is a variable, not a constant. In this debrief, Jarome uses a powerful metaphor from golf - playing the swing you brought to the course today - to dismantle the dangerous idea that your best is a fixed standard. This episode isn't about lowering your ambition; it's a masterclass in strategic acceptance and intelligent adjustment. You'll learn the system for navigating the imperfect rounds of business, how to win when you don't feel 100%, and why the most critical skill isn't always peak performance, but the ability to manage your misses and secure a gritty win.

✨ Why This Matters for You

This episode provides a mental model for high-stakes performance when conditions are anything but perfect. You will learn to:

• Reframe your entire concept of "your best" from a rigid, unattainable benchmark to a dynamic capacity that changes daily, freeing you from the tyranny of "should."
• Distinguish between productive adjustment (the mark of a pro) and emotional reaction (the path to compounding a bad day).
• Master the art of the "gritty win"—the ability to find and execute the one critical move that advances your mission, even when your energy and resources are low.

📝 Key Takeaways

• Your Best is Not a Fixed Standard: Your highest quality output is variable. It changes based on sleep, cash flow, personal stress, and team dynamics. The goal is not to hit a static "best" every day, but to give 100% of whatever capacity you have available today.
• Adjust, Don't Abandon: When facing an "off" day, the tendency is to either force a failing strategy or collapse completely. The professional response is to adjust the plan—change your target, alter your risk level, or choose a different tool—without abandoning your core principles or long-term standards.
• The Danger of "Should": The word "should" (e.g., "I should have more energy") keeps you in an argument with your present reality. True progress comes not from fighting your current state, but from accepting it as the starting point for your next strategic decision.
• Manage Your Misses: Peak performance isn't just about maximizing your ceiling; it's about raising your floor. The best outcomes often come not from perfect execution, but from effectively managing your mistakes, eliminating the catastrophic downside, and maintaining emotional equilibrium through volatility.

🚀 Put It Into Action

• Define Your "One Thing" Daily: At the start of each day, take a moment for an honest assessment of your true capacity (energy, focus, resources). Then ask yourself the question from The One Thing: "What is the one thing that, if I accomplish it, will make today a win?" Make that your non-negotiable priority.
• Conduct a Reality-Based Strategy Check: The next time a project or day feels "off," pause. Instead of forcing your original plan, identify the specific conditions you're facing (e.g., low team energy, unexpected client pressure). Consciously choose one strategic adjustment—like leaving the "driver in the bag"—to align your actions with reality, not your ideal state.
• Perform a "Bad Day" Debrief: Don't just discard your tough days. At the end of a day where you didn't have your "A-game," spend 10 minutes journaling on what that experience revealed. What data did you collect about your own grit, your team's resilience, or your systems' weaknesses? Use these rounds as the most valuable source of intel for future growth.

🔗 Stay Connected

• Subscribe to the No Trade Secrets podcast so you never miss an episode.
• Connect with Jarome on LinkedIn
• Share this episode with a fellow founder who is building with intention.

Welcome back to the powerful conclusion with Anton Kinloch, the visionary force behind Lone Wolf Kingston. In PART THREE, we move from the foundational 'whys' of building a values-driven business to the gritty, in-the-trenches reality of sustaining it against all odds. How can you turn competitors into collaborators to strengthen the entire industry? What is the disproportionate, soul-crushing power of a single negative review, and how can you fight back? And what's the one simple question you can ask anyone to immediately build a deeper, more authentic connection? Let’s finish strong.

⏮️ Catch Up on Previous Parts

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

The Asymmetry of Feedback: Consumers are wired to share negative experiences far more widely than positive ones, a reality that is amplified by algorithms that give undue weight to 1-star reviews. Anton reveals it can take upwards of 20 five-star reviews to offset the damage of a single, context-free negative one. This highlights the critical need for businesses to actively solicit positive feedback and for consumers to understand the massive impact of their words.

Community Over Competition: The old model of viewing every similar business as an enemy is dead. Anton champions the "rising tides raise all ships" philosophy, arguing that F&B venues are now so diversified that they should actively support one another. By recommending other great establishments that offer a different specialty, you build trust with customers, strengthen the local scene, and collectively raise the standard for everyone, naturally weeding out the bad actors.

Educate to Elevate: Stop gatekeeping your knowledge. Anton’s strategy is to openly educate guests—sharing the history, techniques, and passion behind his craft—to empower them with a new standard of quality. When a customer leaves with a deeper appreciation and understanding, they carry that new benchmark to every other venue, becoming a force that challenges and elevates the entire industry from the ground up.

🤫 The No Trade Secret

The secret is to immediately shift the spotlight from yourself onto the other person by asking: "What are you working on that you're passionate about?" This simple question disarms people and invites them to share what truly makes them tick, building instant rapport and genuine connection. It transforms a transactional interaction into a memorable relationship, whether it's with a client, a guest at your bar, or a potential collaborator.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"It's important for us to support each other collectively because rising tides raise all ships." – Anton Kinloch

"If you are not visibly seen and recognized and your complaints or concerns are not recognized, you feel more insulted than the actual insult itself." – Anton Kinloch

"The hospitality industry has always been all about bending over backwards, so much so that it's a detriment to ourselves." – Anton Kinloch

👤 About Anton

Anton is a hospitality operator, bartender, educator, and consultant based in the Hudson Valley. He is the owner and operator of Lone Wolf in Kingston, New York, and previously operated Fuchsia Tiki Bar in New Paltz. His work blends craft cocktails, food, design, education, and service into hospitality concepts that are thoughtful, intentional, and deeply rooted in the guest experience. Through his bars and consulting work, Anton has built a reputation for bringing creativity, technical skill, and a strong point of view to the hospitality industry. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Email Anton at [email protected]
• Visit the Lone Wolf Cocktail Bar Website
• Check out Lone Wolf's Instagram

 🎧 Missed the beginning? Go back and catch up on PART ONE and PART TWO

Welcome back to another raw and unfiltered conversation with Anton Kinloch, a 25-year veteran of the food and beverage industry. In PART ONE, we laid the groundwork for Anton's philosophy on building authentic community. In PART TWO, we’re pulling back the curtain on the entire industry’s darkest secrets. What toxic culture of abuse and unpaid labor is hiding behind the world’s most celebrated Michelin-star restaurants? Are prestigious industry awards just a “pay-to-play” game for giant corporations? And what is the one simple, no-cost action you can take to actually save your favorite local spot from disappearing forever?

⏮️ Catch Up on Previous Parts

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

Pull Back the Curtain for Your Customers: The hospitality industry has long been conditioned to hide its struggles to preserve "the magic" for the guest. Anton argues for the exact opposite: radical transparency. By openly sharing the realities of running a business—from the astronomical cost of tomatoes to the razor-thin profit margins—you don't alienate customers; you bring them into the fold, build unbreakable trust, and turn them into genuine advocates for your survival.

Expose the "Pay-to-Play" Myth: Prestigious awards like the Michelin Guide are losing their integrity. Anton reveals how massive corporate partnerships (like Sysco's) are forcing the guide to favor commoditized consistency over the true art of seasonality and local sourcing. The takeaway is to stop chasing hollow accolades and instead double down on the authentic principles that built your business, even if it means rejecting the industry's broken definition of "the best."

Activate Your 1% Army: You don’t need grand gestures to support your favorite spots; you need small, consistent actions. For operators, this means applying the "1% rule" to transparency and consistently sharing your reality. For consumers, this means understanding the immense power of leaving a positive online review. That simple, free action directly influences new customers and can be the deciding factor in whether a beloved local business survives or fails.

🤫 PART TWO's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART TWO!)

Legendary chef Marco Pierre White—the man who made Gordon Ramsay cry—famously turned in all of his Michelin stars. Why? Because the guide's obsession with consistency penalized him for using seasonal, variable ingredients from local farm partners. He chose to be a "chef for the people" rather than chase accolades that compromised his art. The secret is knowing when to reject the industry's definition of success to protect your own.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"[For years], if you worked in this industry, you had to sacrifice a portion of yourself in order to level up. And I think that we are finally coming round as an industry in general saying, you know what, this is not sustainable." – Anton Kinloch

"We as an industry have always been very secretive. We've always been about showcasing the positive, bubbly, kind of fun side of the industry... But at the end of the day, we also do it by capitalizing on the labor of the people that we work with." – Anton Kinloch

"When you look at that dish and you say, 'Oh my God, $27 for X,' guess what? Over 85%, over 90% of that nowadays is literally lost to costs... So now you literally have this 5% margin to work with, and that's if you're lucky." – Anton Kinloch

👤 About Anton

Anton is a hospitality operator, bartender, educator, and consultant based in the Hudson Valley. He is the owner and operator of Lone Wolf in Kingston, New York, and previously operated Fuchsia Tiki Bar in New Paltz. His work blends craft cocktails, food, design, education, and service into hospitality concepts that are thoughtful, intentional, and deeply rooted in the guest experience. Through his bars and consulting work, Anton has built a reputation for bringing creativity, technical skill, and a strong point of view to the hospitality industry. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Email Anton at [email protected]
• Visit the Lone Wolf Cocktail Bar Website
• Check out Lone Wolf's Instagram

 🎧 Missed the beginning? Go back and listen to PART ONE!

🎧 Make sure to tune in to PART THREE to hear Anton Kinloch’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" and keep this momentum going

Anton Kinloch set out to be a chef, graduating from the Culinary Institute of America with a business degree in hand. But his first job behind a bar triggered a massive pivot. He discovered the power of instant gratification - seeing a guest's reaction in real-time, and realized the financial upside of a beverage-first model. In this episode, Anton unpacks his playbook for engineering unforgettable guest experiences, revealing why true hospitality starts with paying your staff a living wage and how he navigates an industry where a 3% profit margin is the new, unsustainable normal.

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

The Instant Gratification Pivot: Anton’s career shifted from a chef-focused path to a bar-centric one due to the immediate feedback loop of serving guests drinks. Unlike the back-of-house, where you rarely see a diner's reaction, the bar offers an instant connection and the ability to see if you’ve created a magical moment. This insight, combined with the superior profit margins of beverage programs, led him to build his businesses around a strong bar with a tight, intentional food menu.

Proactive Hospitality: Anton’s team goes beyond standard service by researching guests before they even arrive. Using publicly available information from social media, they look for small details—like a recent vacation or an anniversary—to create surprise-and-delight moments. Recreating a cocktail someone enjoyed in Hawaii or surprising a couple with a custom dessert for their anniversary transforms a simple night out into a core memory, all without being intrusive.

Invest in Your Team First: Anton’s philosophy is that exceptional service is impossible when your staff is stressed about making rent. By paying a living wage well above the industry standard, he removes the pressure of relying on tips. This allows his team to be fully present, creative, and genuinely focused on the guest experience, which reduces turnover and builds a team of true advocates for the business.

🤫 PART ONE's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART ONE!)

The secret to delivering exceptional hospitality isn't just about the guest; it's about removing the financial pressure from your team. By paying a living wage, you free your staff from the stress of relying on tips, allowing them to be fully present, creative, and genuinely invested in the guest experience. A secure team is empowered to create unforgettable moments.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"[People] will always forget the drinks, they'll forget the food, but they will never forget how you made them feel. The same is applicable to your staff." – Anton Kinloch

"How do we deliver a whole experience where we can... signal to them, hey, we see you, we recognize the situation you're in, and we're here to make it better?" – Anton Kinloch

"I do not know many F&B professionals who are both creative and financially minded. Like, you can either be one or the other, but it's very rare where you can find somebody who's able to do both successfully." – Anton Kinloch

👤 About Anton

Anton is a hospitality operator, bartender, educator, and consultant based in the Hudson Valley. He is the owner and operator of Lone Wolf in Kingston, New York, and previously operated Fuchsia Tiki Bar in New Paltz. His work blends craft cocktails, food, design, education, and service into hospitality concepts that are thoughtful, intentional, and deeply rooted in the guest experience. Through his bars and consulting work, Anton has built a reputation for bringing creativity, technical skill, and a strong point of view to the hospitality industry. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Email Anton at [email protected]
• Visit the Lone Wolf Cocktail Bar Website
• Check out Lone Wolf's Instagram

 🎧 Make sure to listen to PART TWO and keep waiting for that momentum to hear Anton Kinloch’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" in PART THREE

Leadership communication isn't about speaking well or being persuasive; it’s the disciplined practice of understanding before trying to be understood. In this debrief, Jarome dismantles the common misconception that communication is simply the transfer of words, revealing it as the transfer of meaning. He introduces the "leader's temptation" - the urge to jump into correction and solution-mode, and explains how this single impulse can create a vicious cycle of misalignment and disengagement. By reframing listening as a strategic act of data gathering and risk management, Jarome provides a new operating system for leaders to solve the right problems, build psychological safety, and foster a culture of genuine ownership.

✨ Why This Matters for You

For founders and operators, mastering this communication philosophy is the difference between a team that complies and a team that commits. Here’s the perspective shift you’ll gain:

• You will learn to identify how most "execution problems" are actually communication problems in disguise, allowing you to solve the root cause, not just the symptoms.
• You will move from a default mode of control, which breeds compliance, to a system of clarity that creates true ownership and a healthier culture.
• You will reframe listening from a "soft skill" into your most powerful tool for risk management, pattern recognition, and uncovering the fragile points in your organization.

📝 Key Takeaways

• The Leader's Temptation: This is the innate urge for a leader—who often has more context and is steps ahead—to immediately correct, direct, or solve a problem. Succumbing to this temptation means you skip the crucial diagnostic step, often leading you to solve the wrong problem with confidence and damage team trust.
• Seek First to Understand: This is the core principle for effective leadership communication. By prioritizing listening and making a genuine effort to understand your team's perspective, you lower their defensiveness, create psychological safety, and gain access to higher-quality information that separates symptoms from root causes.
• Listening as a Strategic Advantage: Far from being a soft skill, intentional listening is a form of data gathering, pattern recognition, and risk management. It reveals where trust is strong, where processes are broken, and allows you to hear about issues before they become organizational fires.

🚀 Put It Into Action

• Rephrase Your Questions for Understanding. Instead of asking "Why didn't you get this done?", shift your language to invite context. Try using phrases like, "Help me understand what got in the way," "Walk me through your thought process," or "What part of this feels difficult?"
• Practice the Pause-Reflect-Clarify Loop. The next time you feel the urge to immediately respond or correct, consciously pause. Reflect by repeating back what you heard ("Here's what I'm hearing, is that correct?"), then clarify any missing pieces before attempting to align on a goal or make a decision.
• Decouple Understanding from Correction. Make a deliberate effort to separate the act of listening from the act of fixing. When a team member shares their reasoning after you’ve prompted them, do not immediately follow their explanation with a correction. This sequencing builds trust and ensures they don't associate being open with being disciplined.

🔗 Stay Connected

• Subscribe to the No Trade Secrets podcast so you never miss an episode.
• Connect with Jarome on LinkedIn
• Share this episode with a fellow founder who is building with intention.

Welcome back to the finale of our deep dive with communication and leadership expert, Erik Berglund! In PART THREE, we pivot from the foundational principles of influence to the tactical execution that separates good leaders from great ones. What are the only two jobs a leader is truly responsible for? What is the three-step "enrollment" formula that generates authentic buy-in without manipulation? And what is the most common trap that turns high-performing experts into burnt-out, ineffective managers? Get ready to take notes.

⏮️ Catch Up on Previous Parts

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

The Subject Matter Expert Trap: Promoting your best individual contributor into a leadership role is a tale as old as time—and a massive trap. Erik explains that when a leader has all the answers because they used to do the job, they get sucked into solving their team's problems for them. The best leaders don’t need to know how to do the work; their job is to lead their people to solve their own damn problems and develop their talent in the process.

The Leader's Two Core Responsibilities: According to Erik, the job of a leader boils down to only two things. First, hold people accountable to the mission of the organization, ensuring the team gets things done. Second, and just as crucial, is to develop the talent of the people you've been entrusted to lead. If you excel at these two functions, you are an awesome leader, regardless of your subject matter expertise.

The Recipe for Authentic Buy-In: To get true buy-in, you must frame your ask around what's in it for the other person. Erik shares a simple but powerful three-step enrollment formula: 1) Start with what you genuinely want for them. 2) Clearly state your intention or what you'd like to do. 3) Ask for their permission to proceed. This approach disarms resistance and ensures their "yes" is genuine because you gave them a real opportunity to say "no."

🤫 The No Trade Secret
I talk to myself like a crazy person. In the shower, on a drive somewhere. I have gotten over the awkward sensation of literally talking to myself and saying the thing I want to say in that next meeting again and again and again, such that it's just normal... it is very helpful to have said the words you're about to say to a person under stress or under duress a couple times to yourself in a zero-risk environment.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"Doing what you like to do is pretty expensive. Doing the thing that's effective is far more profitable, whatever profit means in your world." – Erik Berglund

"A really good leader doesn't need to know a single thing about what you do in order to help you be more effective at getting it done." – Erik Berglund

"Giving somebody the opportunity to say no is the only thing that actually makes their yes mean anything." – Erik Berglund

👤 About Erik

Erik is the founder of the Language of Leadership and Loominary, and the host of the 'I have some questions' podcast. His work focuses on changing what people say and how they say it in order to be influential. His companies create skill simulation systems that allow people to practice the most difficult conversations before they occur in real life. He lives in Bend, Oregon with his daughters (10 and 7) and his wife of 13 years. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Erik on LinkedIn
• Check out the I Have Some Questions Podcast
• Visit the Loominary website

🎧 Missed the beginning? Go back and catch up on PART ONE and PART TWO

Welcome back to another powerhouse session with the incredible Erik Berglund! In PART ONE, we laid the groundwork for understanding our internal decision-making frameworks. In PART TWO, Erik shifts from the "what" to the "how," giving us the tactical playbook for authentically influencing others. How do you uncover someone's preferred communication style when they don't even know it themselves? What's the critical difference between using scarcity as a cheap tactic versus inspiring through abundance? How can a single word or a subtle shift in tone completely change your message across different cultures?

⏮️ Catch Up on Previous Parts

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

The Simplest Hack: Just Ask: To understand how to best communicate with someone, the most effective method is the most direct: ask them. Erik explains that most people have never articulated their communication preferences, but the sheer act of asking builds immediate trust and connection. Even if they don't have a clear answer, your curiosity shows you care about them as a human, making them far more receptive to your influence.

Tune In to WII.FM: Everyone is naturally tuned into their favorite radio station: "What's In It For Me?" To truly influence someone—whether in sales, leadership, or a personal debate—you must first invest the effort to understand what they value and what they're trying to accomplish. Pitching your solution without understanding their world first feels transactional and will almost always fail because you haven't answered why they should care.

Beyond Words to Culture and Tonality: Communication is so much more than the words you choose. Erik demonstrates how tonality, pace, and body language can completely alter a message's meaning. These signals are culturally specific; what signifies respect in one culture (like averting eye contact) can be interpreted as disrespect in another. True influence requires being aware of these nuances and adapting your approach to bridge the gap.

🤫 PART TWO's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART TWO!)

The core answer is to just try. Be aware of the gap that might exist between your preferred communication style and theirs. Your awareness alone and your effort to bridge that gap will bring you closer to connection and influence than if you had spent no time trying at all. It isn't about getting it perfectly right; it's about the genuine effort to understand the person across from you.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"[It] is never going to go out of style to validate the human being across from you, to convey empathy to them, and to seek to understand what's going on in their world just because you're curious and interested." – Erik Berglund

"The best indicator of how somebody is going to be influenced is how they've previously been influenced." – Erik Berglund

"Just your awareness alone, your effort to bridge the gap, is going to bring you closer than if you had spent no time trying." – Erik Berglund

👤 About Erik

Erik is the founder of the Language of Leadership and Loominary, and the host of the 'I have some questions' podcast. His work focuses on changing what people say and how they say it in order to be influential. His companies create skill simulation systems that allow people to practice the most difficult conversations before they occur in real life. He lives in Bend, Oregon with his daughters (10 and 7) and his wife of 13 years. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Erik on LinkedIn
• Check out the I Have Some Questions Podcast
• Visit the Loominary website

🎧 Make sure to tune in to PART THREE to hear Erik Berglund’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" and keep this momentum going

Most leadership problems are just communication problems in disguise. So what if you could master communication by treating it not as a soft skill, but as a sport you can practice and win? In PART ONE, communication expert Erik Berglund unpacks his playbook, revealing the three distinct arenas of communication: information transfer, shared experience, and pure influence. He challenges you to recognize that your default communication style is likely a foreign language to others and provides the master key to unlocking how anyone—from a client to your spouse—truly wants to be persuaded.

💡 Unlocking the Playbook

Communication is a Sport, Not a Gift: Stop believing that great communicators are born, not made. Erik argues that communication is a professional skill that improves dramatically with deliberate practice and targeted feedback, just like athletics. He honed his own skills through early role-playing in high school, proving that anyone can level up their ability to connect and influence by treating communication as a trainable discipline.

The Three Arenas of Communication: To communicate with intent, you must first know which game you’re playing. Erik divides all communication into three categories: transferring information (teaching or explaining), sharing an experience (connecting and bonding, often nonverbally), and influence (causing someone to do something they wouldn't have done otherwise). Understanding which arena you're in dictates your strategy and clarifies your objective.

Adapt or Be Ignored: Your default communication style—whether it's driven by logic, abundance, or risk avoidance—is not universal. Trying to persuade someone using a "language" they don't speak is a guaranteed path to failure. The first step to becoming influential is acknowledging that your preferred method of making a point is likely not the way the person across from you needs to hear it.

🤫 PART ONE's Playbook Secret (The official No Trade Secret drops in PART THREE, but here is the hidden secret of PART ONE!)

The single most effective way to understand someone's communication style isn't through complex analysis or trying to read body language—it's to simply ask. If you need to persuade someone, ask them directly: "If someone had to make a compelling argument to you, what would you hope to see in that argument?" They will tell you exactly what they need to hear, whether it's data, stories, or a vision for the future.

🗣️ Words to Build On

"If you practice something and get feedback on it, you get better at it. And that doesn't just happen in sports." – Erik Berglund

"My primary way of thinking about communication is being influential. That means getting somebody to do something they would not have done otherwise." – Erik Berglund

"Recognize that your default style is probably not the way everybody around you would prefer to be communicated with... It's like they speak a different language." – Erik Berglund

👤 About Erik

Erik is the founder of the Language of Leadership and Loominary, and the host of the 'I have some questions' podcast. His work focuses on changing what people say and how they say it in order to be influential. His companies create skill simulation systems that allow people to practice the most difficult conversations before they occur in real life. He lives in Bend, Oregon with his daughters (10 and 7) and his wife of 13 years. 

🔗 Links & Resources

• Connect with Erik on LinkedIn
• Check out the I Have Some Questions Podcast
• Visit the Loominary website

🎧 Make sure to listen to PART TWO and keep waiting for that momentum to hear Erik Berglund’s ultimate "No Trade Secret" in PART THREE