Not Allowed to Die

Mariska and I were helping the brother of a student I lost to suicide decide if he wanted to become a public speaker to use his pain to help others. In this episode we talk about how to decide if you should share your story, and how. This episode will not be on Youtube. Currently only my episodes with guests are in the youtube feed. If you want me to change that email me to let me know.

Dallas Goodlet joins Mariska and me to talk about the hole in his heart that came from being adopted (by a very good family) and how that led to addiction, depression, self loathing and his path to healing, and how he has turned walking into a refuge from temptation and a place to get clarity.

Mariska and I finally get to talk to an EMDR practitioner! Becca Ferguson tells us about misconceptions and how EMDR actually works. In addition she is offering you 10% off of her mini courses with the code Not Allowed.

Check out Becca's website and courses:

Dr. Praveena works with parental narcissistic abuse victims. She has created a framework known as the Narcissistic Victim Empowerment Technique (NVET) to help victims find the freedom from manipulating and controlling thoughts of toxic parenting.  She joins Mariska and me to talk about how to overcome narcissistic parents and partners.

Check out her website:

Lately I have been wrestling with the appropriate time to push clients, question them, challenge them, encourage them, and/or just support them. As a therapist or a friend you want the people you talk to to feel comfortable and safe, but sometimes what a person needs to hear is not comfortable. In this episode Mariska and I delve into some of the challenges I have been facing in working with my clients to find what is appropriate for them each week. Sorry the audio quality is still not back to our old standards but it is improving.

In this episode we explore several of my clients who are beating themselves up for not having their lives where they want them. Mariska and I hope to give them a way to reframe and have a little less self judgment.

In this episode Mariska and I discuss some things to think about for therapists, clients, and anyone who is about to consider disclosing something or receiving disclosure of a memory that feels toxic and shameful to the person sharing it.

Mariska and I get the chance to talk to Dana Slowinski, who has been teaching me about DBT for years. Dana is the co-founder of the Family Recovery Centers: https://familyrecoverycenters.com/

This is just a brief overview of DBT to learn more: https://depts.washington.edu/uwbrtc/our-team/marsha-linehan/

When you or people you care about have had their safe space violated how do you not let yourself be consumed by anger and hate for the bullies who did it?  In this episode Mariska and I discuss the violation of the privacy of the group room of the school where I work and how that impacts the kids who see that space as a refuge.  Lots of references to my favorite movie It's a Wonderful Life.  

Ever wonder what a therapist is thinking after a client discloses that they made a suicide attempt?   Mariska and I talk through my feelings after a recent disclosure.